Grief specialist David Kessler argues suicide is an illness, not a selfish choice. Mental illness removes the capacity for logical decision-making. Funeral attendance drops from 78% to 28% for suicide deaths, showing the stigma families face.
Hi, I'm David Kessler. I'm a grief and loss specialist. Here's what I know. Suicide is not a choice or a selfish act. It is an illness of the mind. Saying to a family in grief, "That was a selfish act they committed," is not helpful and can be really cruel. Science now tells us it was an illness of the mind. And there's a difference between making a logical choice in an illness-driven action. They couldn't make a logical choice. At funerals, we see around 78% of attendance, people showing up for the family. When it's a death by suicide, it drops down to 28%. Calling someone with an ill mind selfish is inaccurate. If you don't know what to say after a death by suicide, remember this rule: treat it like it was an illness, because it was.
