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In this first‑person narrative, the speaker—who has a background in massage therapy—draws parallels between massage work and legal sex work. They describe the operational model of licensed brothels as being similar to a hotel, with rented rooms, common areas, and a front‑of‑house bar. Workers receive a sheriff‑issued work card, sign contracts, and handle paperwork. The speaker outlines the health‑and‑safety regime imposed on providers: regular STD testing (weekly or monthly), mandatory condom use, and a pre‑service physical inspection called the "DC" (dick check), where the client must drop their pants for a quick visual exam before any transaction. The speaker notes that they have only had to refuse service to a few clients per year, indicating the system’s effectiveness.

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