3 Lessons on Living a Life of Meaning

I'd like to ship you a free copy of my book, Habits of High Performers. If you come and join the 2026 goal setting workshop, I will ship you one of these today. The link is in the notes. Please come and join me to set up the very best 2026 you could imagine. If you've set up goals in the past or New Year's resolutions and they haven't substantiated, I'm here to help you across all the key pillars of your life nail your goals. I'll see you there. Welcome to Lead On Purpose. I'm James Laughlin, former seven time world champion musician and now executive coach to global leaders and high performers. Each week I'll publish a solo cast where I'll share my top high performance habits and methodologies to supercharge your life and career. If you enjoy the show, please take a short moment to subscribe and leave a rating and review. I'd greatly appreciate it. Thanks for taking the time to connect today and investing in yourself. Enjoy the show.

I'd like to thank NZ Mortgages for sponsoring the Lead On Purpose podcast. You can check them out at nzmortgages co nz. Welcome back to the show. I just want to share something really important with you. Did you know that here in New Zealand we have one of the highest bowel cancer rates on the planet? Look, I think it's around 3000 people every year get diagnosed with it and 1200 will actually die from it. That's over a third of the people that are actually that have it that will die. The statistics are unbelievable. The reason I'm talking about this right now is last night I was speaking at an amazing charity event. I was the emcee for the night with some incredible guest speakers, which I'm going to share of the gold with you that they shared with us. But it was by the Gut foundation here in New Zealand, run by the amazing CEO Alice Fitzgerald. And what they're doing is they're on a mission to spread the word around this beautiful country that we need to be talking about our bowel movements. And she's very awesome. She talks about we got to give a shit, we got to talk shit, let's talk shit. And you know, I don't swear a lot on the show here, but you get the pun. We've got to be more open and relaxed and comfortable in talking about our bowel movements and keeping an eye on it, looking for things. So I'm not going to give you any advice on doing that stuff now. That's not my area of expertise, but I will put a link to the Gut Foundation's URL in the show notes. They've got amazing resources. They actually go all around the country into different workplaces and they do these amazing toolbox talks. It's just, it's phenomenal. They do it for all different types of companies and Alice is great at delivering them, as is her team. So definitely go check it out. But I want to share some gold with you because. Because I got the chance to be the MC and interview some legends. I'm going to tell you who they are. Razor Robertson, who is the current head coach of the All Blacks. He's the most prolific super rugby coach on the planet ever. I think it was out of 117ish games, he won like a massive, like, massive percentage. It was up around like 90 plus percent. Just phenomenal. Unreal. Unheard of, in fact. And of course he's now head coach of one of the best teams on the planet. He's a great thinker, he's got great insights. We had Raeleen Castle, who's the CEO of Sport New Zealand. She's the former CEO of Rugby Australia and Netball New Zealand. She's done a lot of governance. Fascinating speaker. And last but certainly not least is the amazing Dr. Alia Bushilova, former lead psychologist in the SAS, was taken hostage in Syria, is a best selling author and yes, I'll put a link to her book in the show notes. It's the Resilience Toolkit. She's got her master's. Sorry, her doctorate in resilience. So definitely worth checking out. So I want to get into it and just share with you because I know that you show up here, you're so incredible, you're loyal, you keep coming back to the show. Why? Because it adds value. I bring insights from the most incredible people on the planet to you in the hopes that they'll be valuable in your work, in your career, in your personal development and the mastery of your life and becoming better every day. And I like these little short snippets that I share because I know I get feedback from you guys. Some of you drop me mail so you can actually, there's a new feature on the podcast if you're listening on Apple or Spotify, you can see that there's a little URL that says send me a text. You can send me a text directly if you want to give me feedback or email me or whatever way you want to contact the team. But I appreciate you guys saying, James, the short ones are just as good as the long ones because sometimes in the short ones, I'm driving to the shops or I've got a five minute journey or I'm going out for a quick jog. So really great to get your feedback. And if you've got any guests that you'd like me to interview, please just let me know. My mind is a bit blown, seriously blown, about who I'm going to get to interview in this next six months. In my life of thinking about podcasting, I never thought I'd get to interview these people. Dream come true. I haven't quite got Barack Obama on the list yet of confirmations, but that is also like, that's, that's number one. I want to get him on the show, I want to talk to him, I want to understand how he leads his life on purpose. So watch this space, folks, and if you can help me connect with him, please do so. Let me get to it. I've taken some notes, as you know, for those that are watching on YouTube. Got my journal in hand. I love to journal every day. It's just a process of getting out of my head. Getting onto the page allows me to think, it allows me to reflect, it allows me to challenge myself and just to record some of the gold. So I'm not going to share everything. There may be a little bit of exclusive content from last night's event that I do share with you listeners. So listening carefully over the next couple of weeks, I might drop it somewhere. I'll probably not put it in full format here on the podcast, but I might just drop it for you guys to go and check out somewhere. So first things first, let's start with the amazing Raelene Castle. So the thing that I wrote here last night, she shared so much and you know, some of you may be familiar with Raylene, there was the Israel Folau saga. So he was arguably one of Australia's most well known professional athletes. Played for the rugby team the Wallabies. But he put a public statement out essentially saying that homosexuals will go to hell. And you can go and check it out, you just do a Google search, you'll see it all. It was horrific and it was, you know, representing his views. But also he's in a very privile position. And to be saying such things obviously incites a lot of unrest, concern, disappointment, sadness, fear, all those awful things. So Raylene at the time was CEO of Rugby Australia. Essentially she was his boss. So Raylene decided to get rid of him. Gone, see you later. And you Know, chatting to Raeleen last night, she shared quite openly about it.

Smart decision. Right decision? Why. Why do I say that? Well, let me just share with you what she shared with me and why I think this applies, and I think this could help you when you're trying to make a decision. And just remember when you're leading or you've got responsibility, it's not about being popular. It's about being respected. And if you stick to your values and principles, people, good people, will respect you for that. It's not about being liked by the media or social media or people at the office. It's about doing the right thing. So here's what she shared in my words, kind of summarizing it, of course, have core values and principles to inform and shape your behavior. Don't get caught up in other people's opinions. Raylene shared with me she got death threats in Australia. They did these awful cartoons depicting her as different things all over the media, like, just horrific. But what I love about that, she's like, James. I made the decision to get rid of him based on principles, morals, values, things we'd agreed to, things that were in his contractual agreement around what he could and couldn't do. And he broke his agreement. And so I kept my. Upheld my agreement with my employer to say, hey, I'll do the right thing. And some people might have disagreed with her decision, but I admire people who make decisions based on values and standards and what they agree to doing. Do we all do that all the time? Look. No, we don't. We're human. I make mistakes all the time. I often go, oh, geez. If I had to sat back and thought a little bit longer, what would my true values have came through and shone through? Three of my key values. Mastery, curiosity, and connection. To me, those are things that every day, I really try to live into it just a little bit. But mastery is like, I'm a rookie, I'm a learner. I know nothing. I want to always remain in that curious mindset. And the connection is like, how do I connect with great humans like you? Who's listening right now or watching? How do I connect with you and help you and learn from you? Those are my values. So often when I'm making decisions, they're through those. Now, we've all got lots of values. Maybe it's loyalty, maybe it's faith, maybe it's excellence, maybe it's joy. We've got hundreds that actually we value, but there's two or three that are core that drive us. I would challenge you to think for a second. What's the one, two or maybe even three core values that really drive you? I'm not talking priorities. Priorities to me, family, fitness, finance, learning and business, in that order. So what are they for you? So you've got values and priorities, but for values. But what would they be? Now let me share with you a little insight from Dr. Aliya Bushalova. Dr. Aliya is phenomenal. She is the most incredible mindset. She is one of the world's leading psychologists. Her ability to articulate very complex things and distill them in a way that a simple Irishman like me can understand is phenomenal. So if you haven't listened to the feature length episode I did with her, I'm going to ask the team just to pop it in the show notes below. You need to go and listen to that episode. We go into more detail about her kidnapping, getting taken hostage, potential beheading, and how she convinced her captors in Syria to let her go. You got to go and listen to it. But back to what I learned. This was interesting. Someone in the audience, we did Q and A at the end and someone in the audience asked a really great question around. Hey, the people that apply to go into the SAS and those that get in and then that don't get in, what's the difference? Because arguably the people that are selected or recruited or shoulder tapped or apply to go into the elite forces, they're pretty high performers. They're phenomenal at what they do. They're probably the best of the best. They go to apply, yet there's such a high failure rate. It's the same in the Navy Seals got 25, 30% pass rate. Not very good when you think about it, but that's the standard that they're setting. It's gruesome. I think the word Aliya used was brutal. Training for the New Zealand SAS is brutal. So here's what she shared is the one thing that really stood out because she analyzed and supported and equipped these individuals that were going through the training. And she said this was the one thing over everything else that really stood out as the one thing that helped people get through these brutal moments. And you may be in the SAS or elite forces, but many of you listening right now won't be. But you are fighting battles each day with decisions with health, with relationships, with finance, with government decisions with crazy drivers on the road, Right? So I want you to think about how this could apply to you. So here's what it was. Self awareness is the Difference that makes the difference in elite special forces. Now those are my words. In reflecting in terms of what she shared, she shared it in much more detail. But self awareness was the word she came back to. And personal agency, those two things were so crucial. She said, when we've got high self awareness and high personal agency, we can move through, we can push through tough things, we can do really difficult things. So I want you to ask yourself, how self aware are you? And most of us like to think we're very self aware. Most of us are again, very self aware. I'm very emotionally intelligent, but actually people who generally tell me that when I sit back and look at them because generally you see it by people's actions, like emotionally intelligent and reading a room. And they're not very, they talk a lot, they don't listen, they interrupt. There's a lot of bragging. So I want you to think about your self awareness. How self aware are you? That's one of the reasons I journal. I want to be way more self aware than I am. And I said continual journey. When I journal, it allows me to heighten my self awareness. When I meditate, again, heighten self awareness. It's interesting, some people call these trends meditation and journal rubbish. They're not trends. These things have been around for millennia.

But nowadays we're seeing how they can actually help us in everyday life. So I don't think they're trans. They're not going to be here and disappear. They've always been here, they're always going to stay. They're crucial. So I want you to think about what you do to heighten your self awareness. There's a couple of questions that many psychologists have shared with me over the years that you ask at the end of the day that can really help heighten your self awareness. I'm going to share those with you. One, what went well today? Two, what didn't go so well? And three, what did I learn today? It's interesting how many different psychologists from different backgrounds and parts of psychology have shared those three same questions. They allow us to self reflect, be introspective, heighten our awareness. So please think about using those three questions. Super simple. What went well? What didn't go so well? And what did I learn today? It could be one word answers, could be the same answer. Some days it could be something very small or something massive. Have a think about that. Okay. Last but definitely not least is the current head coach for the All Blacks and for those that are not from New Zealand, that are listening into this, the All Blacks are a world class, world champion. Not currently, but world champion rugby team. And they are just phenomenal. Their record is unreal. So we got a chance to sit down last night and connect with Razor Robertson. His name is Scott Robertson. For those that are not familiar with him is Nick. Name's Razor. He was the head coach for the Canterbury Crusaders, the most highly esteemed provincial rugby team as part of a franchise on the planet. They're phenomenal. Great record. He had seven straight national titles. Incredible. So chatting to him, I think he thinks in such a unique way. And he talked quite openly about his dyslexia and how that for a long time has allowed him to see things in a different way than others who don't have dyslexia. See. And he shared something really cool. So he said, be clear on vision, mission and purpose. He was very, very clear about that. And it's interesting. So I've worked with a lot of his players over the years and I've always been asking why they go the extra mile. Why give Razor Robertson the discretionary effort that they give? And they talk a lot about the care that he had, the care, the value that he gave them, but also how much he valued them, the time that he spent with them, rubbing shoulders, being together, creating memories. So he's very clear on that vision, mission and purpose. We've got to understand what it is. We've got to know where we're headed. There's got to be an emotional component to that. There's got to be an actual tactical outcome to that. People have got to understand why we do what we do, who we're serving. Because high performance is driven by a deep why. Why do we do the thing? And I know many companies that simply don't know their why. If you don't know your why, I promise you, your senior leaders, your executive leaders, they're not going to have the discretionary effort. They're not going to go the extra mile that you need them to go. We need to understand why we're doing what we're doing. And I guess the last but not least was I think of Razer as a great storyteller. He's humorous, he's self deprecating, he's funny in so many ways. But he's got this wisdom and it's a bit kind of almost like Confucius or Lao Tzu. It's really amazing. He thinks quite deeply about concepts. Big believer in theming. And some of the sports teams that I've worked with over the years Theming is so crucial. Picking a theme, he said in the earlier years when he took over Canterbury Crusaders, their theme was Rumble in the Jungle. Muhammad Ali and he went into the detail of why that theme was picked and why it was so relevant. Because Muhammad had had two massive big knockouts, you know, he lost two big games and this had happened for the Crusaders. And then Muhammad was going up against George Foreman, going to take it back and beat George, be the first ever to beat George. So he had all this deep seated themes and they would have music around it, they'd have imagery around it, they'd have stories around it, and they'd carry it throughout an ENT season. How many workplaces or organizations do you see seasonal theming? I just don't see it. I really don't. They might pick a word like relentless. There's our theme for the year. Where's the story? Where's the emotion? I love. I seriously love it. Going into organizations and understanding their challenges, but then getting them out of their heads and into their hearts. I love nothing more than that. Firing them up and inspiring them through story. And you think about it as a kid, stories allowed us to dream. They allowed us to feel like we were part of that journey, escape into something that was really inspiring. Well, we're still big kids right now. We still want to be inspired, we still want to dream and we still want to move towards stuff that really attracts us. So story and theming and using music and different tactile things and touching all of that stuff is really, really important in allowing each of us individually to grow and master ourselves. But also in our teams and organizations, it's absolutely crucial. Like crucial. So I hope that those insights were valuable to you. Hope you might be able to apply one or two or more of them to some part of your life or work or career or relationship. But I certainly had so much joy in sitting down with those three great speakers and meeting the incredible audience who came to support this great cause. It was simply phenomenal. So we're getting towards the end of the solo cast. Please do me a favor. If you're on Apple, please hit the subscribe button. If you could leave me a review, I would deeply appreciate it. It'd be phenomenal. And for those of you that I'll be seeing, please come and say hello. I'm doing a lot of keynotes over this next few months. Several in New Zealand this month, couple in Australia, I'm over to the uk, a couple in London, one in Northern Ireland. Going to get to see my family, which is pretty cool. But if you're at any of my keynotes and you listen in, please come and say hello. Would love to meet you. Thank you for continuing to support the podcast. Please share it with a friend, pop it on your social media. But as again, the final words of every podcast that I always say is this. Please get out there and lead your life on purpose. I'd like to thank NZ Mortgages for sponsoring the Lead on Purpose podcast. You can check them out at nzmortgages Co nz. Thanks for tuning in today and investing in your own personal leadership. Please hit that subscribe button and I'd love if you'd leave me a rating and review. I've got some amazing guests lined up for you in the coming weeks and leaders, it's that time to get out there and lead your life on purpose.