Three Ways to Supercharge Your Network
7 Mar 2023 · 1 min
James Laughlin shares three networking strategies: adopt a curious, promotion-focused mindset; find shared projects to deepen relationships; and lead by giving value first. MBA students spend over 50% of networking time with people they already know, despite 95% wanting new connections.
Questions this episode answers
March 7, 2023.
Habits of High Performers.
95% wanted to meet new contacts.
They spent over 50% of their time with people they already knew.
About 165 lawyers at a large firm.
Chapters
I'd like to ship you a free copy of my book Habits of High Performers. If you come and join the 2026 goal setting workshop, I will ship you one of these today. The link is in the notes. Please come and join me to set up the very best 2026 you could imagine. If you've set up goals in the past or New Year's resolutions and they haven't substantiated, I'm here to help you across all the key pillars of your life nail your goals. I'll see you there. Welcome to Lead On Purpose. I'm James Laughlin, former seven time world champion musician and now executive coach to global leaders and high performers. Each week I'll publish a solo cast where I'll share my top high performance habits and methodologies to supercharge your life and career. If you enjoy the show, please take a short moment to subscribe and leave a rating and review. I'd greatly appreciate it. Thanks for taking the time to connect today and investing in yourself. Enjoy the show.
I want to share with you three ways to supercharge your your network. You've probably heard that age old saying, your network equals your net worth. Look, I don't want to get transactional. I believe in partnership and collaboration. So look, here's some benefits you're going to get from supercharging your network. Salary growth, multiplication of innovation, increased productivity and much higher quality of work. That sounds great right now. Look. A new study of of MBA students at an organized networking event found that 95% of them wanted to meet new contacts, but they spent over 50% of time with people they already knew. Now isn't that quite contradictory? Almost 100% of them wanted to meet new people, yet they spent over 50% of the time with people they already knew. Why? Why do we do that? Have you caught yourself doing that? Why? Well, yes, it's natural. It's safe to be around people who are in our tribe already. But we don't grow when we stay in our tribe. We grow when we explore, when we go to the outer limits of our territory, outer limits of our comfort zone. That's where we really expand and grow and meet new people, get our ideas challenged. And people who are studying for an mba, arguably they're some of the most competitive, driven, innovative people yet intrinsically built into them. They are naturally inclined to be around people in their own tribe. But the 5% of people who get out there and meet new people, those are the people who supercharge their networks. Another study showed that networking for the purpose of advancing our professional goals can actually make us feel dirty. Have you ever been to a networking event like here? We have the bni and I know that's worldwide and it's a networking event and I've been to a couple of BNI meetings and sometimes it does feel a little dirty, it feels a little transactional. However, we're going to get into why it's important to push past that. And I'm not saying you need to join a BNI at all. What I am saying is we need to get ourselves in the right places with the right people that are going to help us add value, but also add value to, to ourselves. Harvard released a piece of research around. It was about 165 lawyers at a large firm and they found that their success depended on their ability to network effectively both internally and externally. Those who regarded these networking activities as distasteful and avoided them had fewer billable hours than their peers. Right. So I mean, the study just shows that when you network, when you have an optimistic approach to that networking, it's going to have a direct impact on your professional life. It's just a fact. So I want us to take a little look at, well, what's going to make the difference? Here's three ways for you to supercharge your networking. Number one, focus on the upside. I'd love you to write that one down. Focus on the upside. That some people are what we'd call promotion focused people. Others are prevention focused people. Promotion focused is like, how can this promote my career? How can this promote my values, my strengths? Whereas the prevention focused people are like, this is. This feels weird. I don't like it. This doesn't feel right. We want to be leaning on the edge of promotion focused mindset. So focusing on the upside. Write that one down. If you focus on the upside, you focus on, okay, I'm going to go to this event or this experience, this conference, the summit, and it's going to be uncomfortable and there might be some awkward silence, there might be some interesting conversations, but I'm going to focus on the upside. What will this experience, if I approach it with that possibilitarian mindset, what will it mean for me personally? What will it mean for me financially? What will it mean for my team, for my family, my community, my career trajectory? What will it mean for freedom and abundance? Focus on the upside. Here's a question I would attach to that. I'm a big believer in taking action. So the question I would ask when going to any event Is when I meet someone, what can I learn? The most interesting person in any room is the most interested person that room. The person who asks questions, the person who gets curious, they are the most interesting person. And again, data and research backs this up. My question to you right now is, are you that person that's curious? Do you go in and ask questions or do you go in and think, what can I tell people about what I'm doing right now and how excited I am about it and where my company's going and what we're going to achieve and what we're going to do and how my career is going to do this and that and all my big wins. Are you that person who has to fill the space and has to have all the accolades or are you the person that goes, tell me more about what you're doing. What are you most excited for right now? Tell me how you do that. What's your biggest challenge? What are you headed towards this year? What are you headed towards over the strategic five year plan? My challenge to you, if you truly want to network like a legend and get the best network you can possibly get, is be curious and focus on that upside. What can I learn? That is the question. No matter where you go into the office meeting, annual, check in with your group or your team, an organized networking event, a summit, a conference, whatever, what can I learn? You can't get nervous. You can't feel transactional when you ask the question, what can I learn? If you go in with what can I get? What can I get out of this? That is a totally different approach. That's self centered. There's no giving, there's no contribution. And yeah, you might feel a little distasteful, you might feel a little transactional, but what can I learn? Whoa, you're going to have a totally different conversation. That's the first way that you could supercharge your network. Okay, the second before I give you the second, please can you do me a favor? I'd really love it and appreciate it. Could you please subscribe to the podcast and you do that on Apple Podcasts or Spotify, Hit that subscribe button and download the episodes. That helps me to reach more people like you. And I do this because I love it and I share everything I can, everything I learn and the people that I interview because I want to help you help the people around you by me giving you insights and bringing you great guests. I just hope that it serves you and your community. So please help me by leaving me a rating and review and Hitting that subscribe button, share the episode with a friend. Okay, so number two.
Find common ground. So when you're networking or meeting people, the objective is always to find common ground. And that's not, hey, what car do you drive? Oh, wow. I drive a Volkswagen too. That's not what it is. Oh, I support that sports team as well. Yeah, that's cool. But let's find the common ground professionally. So studies in social psychology demonstrated that people establish the most collaborative and longest lasting connections when they work together on tasks that require one another's contributions. So you get the longest lasting impact and the best impact, the best connections when you find a common project that you can work on common ground. So when you're being curious and you're out to learn, find out what it is that person wants and ask yourself, how can I support them with that? Where do I fit in? Could we work together on this? So finding common ground is one of the fastest ways to, to take your networking relationship from transactional to relational. And we want to bridge that gap. Real quick, I'd love you to. If you can go to a networking event, sign up for a BNI or go to some networking event and just go to learn and look around you and see how many people are transactional, you might find it's up in the 80% or more. And look for those people that are relational, that aren't trying to do the hard sell or the self promo. They're there to engage and give. So what is the common ground? Where is the common ground? How do we meet on that common ground? Collaboration is the key. If you want to succeed and build a really incredibly rich network, you've got to find common ground. Okay, last but not least, this is the third way to really supercharge your network. And look, I have to say, I'm so privileged and so grateful for the network that I have. And I often don't call it network, I just call it the great humans that are around me, the people that I get to connect with. I feel the word network has negative connotations, but these are people in my community and we support each other. But I'm so grateful that I've got these people who are running small companies, people who are running large organizations, people who are performing at the top, their industry, some people who've, you know, ran countries even. I'm so grateful that they are part of the fabric that makes up my community that I can reach out to and connect with and add value and find common ground. I'm just so grateful and I want you to have the exact, the same thing. And I know you already have a network, but how can you supercharge it? If you supercharge your network, you're going to supercharge your results, bottom line. Okay, Last way for you to supercharge that network is lead with giving. Yes, that's right. Lead with giving. Networking is often regarded as take, take, take, what can I get? What's in it for me? But if you lead with giving, the law of reciprocity will mean that you will get so much more in the long run in an authentic way. And the, and that law of reciprocity is simply this. When you give and give and give some more, the person or the organization that you're giving to, or the people, the family, those people are naturally at an intrinsic level. They're naturally inclined to want to give back to you, to be thankful, to be grateful. The vast majority of humans, when they're given something from a place of love and authenticity, they naturally want to help the other person that has given it to them. So I'm going to challenge you to ask yourself, where can I give more without expecting things in return? The law of reciprocity doesn't work when you expect something in return. So the question I want you to ask here, anytime you're going into an event or a summit or a networking event, the question I want you to ask is this. Where can I add value? Simple question, right? Where can I add value? Doesn't matter who you're working with, talking to, whether it's family, whether it's professional, where can I add value? That changes your mindset to oh, what do I know that I can give or pass on or connect people, develop other people's networks for them by connecting. Where can I add value? It might be something that you do in your profession that you're just world class at, that you're willing to do at no cost or, or heavily discount, or you're willing to do something that really, truly adds color and value to another person. Now look, if you were to implement those three strategies over the next six weeks, I know that your network will get supercharged. And I'm going to just quickly recap them. One, focus on the upside. Two, find common ground. And three, lead with giving. I hope you enjoyed this week's episode and I'm really excited to bring you our next guest, so stay tuned for that. But for now, please get out there and lead your life on purpose.
Thanks for tuning in today and investing in your own personal leadership. Please hit that subscribe button. And I'd love if you'd leave me a rating and review. I've got some amazing guests lined up for you in the coming weeks. And leaders. It's that time to get out there and lead your life on purpose.
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