How to Protect Your Energy From Toxic People

Does anybody maybe have some negative people in your life? Just want some, some quick advice on how to manage that. All right. So let's, let's start with this. How do you deal with toxic people, especially during the holidays? Well, we talk about you have to be very careful who you spend time with because who you spend time with is who you become. We start, you know, I had a mentor tell me that some people are batteries included, some people are batteries not included. And they siphon off all your energy. Dealing with negative people, or specifically toxic, especially during the holidays, it could definitely be a challenge. The holidays— and this goes— this, regardless of those holidays, you know, is a time. And I think every day, you know, it should be a time for joy, togetherness, celebration. But toxic Personalities can bring stress, especially when dealing with different or difficult personalities. Let's just put it there. So here's some strategies. For me, I think it's important to set boundaries. When part of being limitless is setting limits, and it sounds like a paradox, but when we have certain constraints, we have more freedom. So I feel like setting boundaries is so critical. And think about even if you don't have toxic people, how you could teach this to somebody else so you could really ingrain this. I think it's important that you decide in advance who you are and aren't willing to tolerate or accept. If certain toxic people, they have certain topics or behaviors, you know, which ones are off limits, you know, be clear about these boundaries for yourself and if necessary with that individual also as well. Remember, It's okay to say no or to limit your exposure to negative influences. And this, for me, that's not just people, that's from whatever I'm consuming. You have to stand guard to the doors of your mind. I think also besides that, another quick tip is just to manage expectations. It's important to manage expectations when dealing with, with difficult people. You can't control their behavior, but you can control your reaction to it. If that makes sense. So you could prepare yourself mentally for the possibility of these challenging interactions and decide ahead of time how you're going to handle them. I think it's really important. My third quick tip would be, you know, how do you stay calm and collected when you're confronted with negativity of any kind? If it could be people or any kind of negativity, somebody make some, you know, some comments on your social media or something. That's why it's so important to have some kind of mindfulness practice, you know, deep breathing. I know there were questions on my breathing strategies to get me kind of my nervous system regulated, because you're in— when you're in fight or flight, you definitely don't learn or perform your best. When you're in fight or flight, you're kind of held hostage in your survival survival brain, and it keeps you from accessing the other parts of your brain, your creativity, your problem solving, uh, your, your mental agility, your emotional regulation. So, um, it's so interesting that a brief moment of stepping away, how it could help you regain your composure, right? And reacting with anger, frustration, sometimes it, it has a place, and yet sometimes it— most, more times than not, it can escalate a, a situation. The last couple of tips I'll give you, if I'm thinking about this, is focusing for— this is easy for the elephants. If you've taken the brain quiz, focusing on empathy. Sometimes understanding that a person's toxic behavior, it may stem from their own struggles or their own insecurities. And when we're sensitive to that, it can help you better approach the situation with empathy. It doesn't excuse their behavior at all. That's not what I'm saying. But it can help you not take it as, as personal, right? We've all heard this quote, um, that hurt people hurt people, right? I think it's also important, choose your battles. And if that's the metaphor, it doesn't have to be a, a conflict, but not every comment or action deserves your attention, and it certainly doesn't deserve your energy. So ask yourself, is this worth my time? Is this worth my emotional investment? And if not, it's best to let it go and focus on the positive aspects of what's going on. Remember, you have this reticular activating system and you're mostly deleting everything. So your reality becomes what you focus on most. And sometimes if we're inputting too much negativity, a negative mind, it's really hard to create a peaceful life. And I think that peace of mind is is high currency. My last quick tip on this is getting support. If you're feeling overwhelmed, is it possible you could have an ally in this and turn to a supportive friend or a family member? Have someone to talk, you know, to provide you with just that emotional, mental support to help you navigate through interactions. Last 2. Self-care is not selfish. So especially during the holidays, there's a lot of stress in general. So what activities can you enjoy and relax and to recharge? Because I find that when we're exhausted, then we're more quick to react. I don't know if you feel the same way, or if we kind of like not eating so good, we tend to do other behaviors and indulge in other things that's not so good. So You know, we always have a choice, and sometimes the choice is joy. Sometimes the choice is peace, and sometimes the the choice is having an exit strategy. That'd be my last tip. If things get overwhelming, it's okay to remove yourself from the situation. So having a plan in place on how you could politely excuse yourself could be very, very, very empowering. So remember, while you can't control how other people behave, you can control how you respond. And when you focus on your own responses. And maintain your mental and emotional health and well-being, you can navigate through any situation, holidays included, with a little more grace, more smoothly, even in the presence of challenging people.