Kwik Brain Episode 38: Eliminate Stress and Make Anxiety Disappear in Minutes (Part 1 of 2)

Welcome to Kwik Brain, bite-sized brain hacks for busy people who want to learn faster and achieve more. I'm your coach, Jim Kwik. Free your mind. Let's imagine if we could access 100% of our brain's capacity.

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Welcome back, Kwik Brain, and the question for today is, How do you get rid of stress? How do you reduce or eliminate anxiety out of your body? And I'm really excited about this topic because we talk about how to speed read and we talk about how to memorize a presentation without notes. But if you're stressed about it and you have a fear of public speaking, for instance, then it could really be a real blocker and obstacle for us to be able to perform. And there's no one really better on the subject of eliminating and reducing this negative stress in our body than our guest on the Kwik Brain Podcast, New York Times bestselling author, my friend for over a decade, Nick Ordner. Thanks for joining.

We've been friends a decade already, Jim?

It's been more than that. I mean, I remember even being there at the premiere of your documentary.

Yeah, yeah. And that came out in 2008 and we were friends before it was released. You were in that little theater in Bethel, Connecticut, right down the road from where I am now. And The movie that started it all.

Yeah, I mean, even then you were ahead of your time. I mean, you having— you always have been, whether it's the documentary, whether it's the Summit, which is the model that you guys started. I mean, it's exciting. I'm excited about tapping because I've been a fan and a follower of your work, obviously, for so long, and it's helped me personally through so many of my challenges, you know, everything from sleep to fear of public speaking. And, and so I'm excited about this episode. And we're actually doing this— this is the first episode I've ever done at a distance. There might be a little bit of background noise where I am, so I apologize for that. It really— it's under real conditions. I want to get this out to people, you know, right away. And the other thing is, we've never done this also. We're also doing this on video. And so I'm going to put this in our show notes also as well, because this is a little bit of a visual. tutorial also as well, so you can watch it there also as well as download it. So, um, so we go right into the practical content, but I also want to give people a little bit of why this works. And so you're absolutely amazing. Why don't we tell people just briefly what EFT is, tapping?

Yeah, absolutely. So EFT, Emotional Freedom Techniques, or tapping— tapping is a general word for it, just like we say meditation encompasses all different kinds of meditation, right? We call it Tapping, because we are literally physically, and if you're listening, what I'm doing right now is physically tapping on these endpoints of meridians of our body. And it's a technique that certainly seems strange at first. I know when I discovered it for myself over a decade ago, I said, we're doing what? Like, why are we hitting ourselves, right? Why are we doing this tapping? What was incredible for me then were the results. I just experienced them in my life. Something was different, and I could see it. And people today, what's going to be exciting is that if you do the tapping with us, you're going to be different now. You're going to be different 10 minutes from now than you are now because we're going to do this process. What the latest research is showing, what's really exciting for me, is that when we tap on these endpoints of meridians, these are major meridians of our body that we're tapping on, we're sending a calming signal to the amygdala in the brain. And Jim, you know well, and a lot of your listeners know, that the amygdala is that fight or flight response center. It's a part of your brain that when you're stressed out, it's activating. It is running from that tiger, running from that bear. And if we look at the things in our lives where we're struggling, where we feel stuck, where we're stressed and overwhelmed, no matter what the issue is, we can trace it back to that fight or flight response. We can trace it back to the amygdala, to that part of you that locks up, right? So if we think about what we're going to work on today, releasing anxiety about a future event, about something that is upcoming. Public speaking, for an example, right? Like you get up on stage and I always say this example when I'm actually up on stage, this is different. There's no audience. But right now you and I are speaking in public in a way. We know people are watching and listening and there's some people listening that even just this experience, if you were interviewing them, Jim, they would be freaking out inside, right? They—

Yeah.

They would lock up. We all know the physical responses, right? So the palms would get sweaty, their stomach might feel nervous, they might clam up. Oh, you ask a question and they're stressed, so they go, um, um, ah, what, what I meant to say is, uh, right? So what's happening there? Like, why do we lose our train of thought? Why do we lose our focus? Why do we lose our capabilities? Why do we lose our memory? Oftentimes it comes back to that stress response. If you are being chased by a tiger, if you're interviewing me and my body feels like it's being chased by a tiger, that amygdala is firing. I literally don't have the mental resources to answer your question. The blood flows away from my forebrain into my arms and legs so I can fight you. I can run from you. I can freeze, but I can't think. I can't create, I can't be present. I can't think of the next thing to say. I can't enjoy the experience, right? Like it's not fun being chased by a tiger. So if you have a fear of public speaking, if you have an upcoming project you have to do, if you have something that you are holding on to tension, anxiety, and that flight or flight response, you're not even going to enjoy it. Right? And how many people go through life going, well, I just powered my way through that, right? Like, We think that's the answer. Willpower. Like, if I'm scared of public speaking, well, I just need to be stronger. I'm going to sweat like crazy before I go on. I'm going to be anxious for 3 months, then I'm going to power through like a warrior, and then it's going to be over, right? To me, that's not what life is about. Like, just if that's going to be the experience, don't do it, or find a way, which is what tapping can do, to release that anxiety, to turn off that fight or flight signal in the brain. And allow the body to know that it's safe in that experience. Like, that's the difference. That's what we're going for, whether it be public speaking, whether it be even just, hey, I've got a project due next week, or I've got to make a phone call that's difficult, or there's a meeting at work and I just keep thinking about it, right? All these places, the time that we spend just imagining, and you know, Jim, right? Like, we're human. We imagine these scenarios. Like, How many times have I done it where you're just like, you make up these things that are going to happen. They're usually pretty awful, you know, like what if this happens? What if that happens? With the tapping, we short circuit that part of the brain. We tell the body it's safe and that's when the flow comes in. That's when the focus comes in. That's when the pleasure and the joy comes in. And that's what I'm excited to do with everyone today.

I'm excited about this too. And I've seen you in front of huge audiences, hundreds and even thousands or more people. You'll have them come right up on stage and you'll ground them through this routine and it's amazing because they'll rate how much pain they're feeling in the beginning and at the end. I mean, it's something that's very, very measurable. So let's say that's the situation. People who are with us right now, they have to prepare for something.

Yeah.

And let's say it's a meeting, important meeting, or maybe it's a presentation or they have to make a sales video. We have a lot of entrepreneurs that do some online marketing and such, but they get nervous.

Yeah.

Test, are they— they have an exam they have to take and have anxiety around it. What, what can we walk people through right now and they could participate? Yeah, let's do it.

So all those scenarios are great. Pick one, right? We might have a lot of things in our lives. We want to focus in on one. And if none of that rings a bell, if you're like, I don't have any projects, pick something in your life you're anxious about. Ideally an upcoming event. But if it's just like, oh, this is happening in my life, just pick that so you can do it with us. All right. And, uh, if you're driving the car, don't do this.

Pull over.

You need 2 hands. But, uh, if you're, if you're not, close your eyes and just take a deep breath and let's take a moment to just get a little grounded. And I want you to, as I said, pick that one scenario, that one thing that you want to work on, that anxiety, that fear, that stress, the presentation, the speech, the project that needs to get done, the video that needs to be filmed. Take a moment to think about that event. You know, we focus on it not to be negative or to lock it in, but to release it. So pick the one event, run it through your mind's eye, and then tune into that feeling of anxiety in your body or your mind and give it a number of intensity on a scale of 0 to 10, whatever comes up. So you might say, oh, it feels like an 8 or 7 or 10. Just pick whatever number comes up and see if you can tune into where in your body you feel that anxiety. So as you think about this event or going to sleep or this presentation, whatever you need to do, Just tune in, feel it in your body, give it a number, and when you're ready, you can gently open your eyes and we're going to do the tapping. I'm going to use very general language because I don't know what everyone's working on out there. Repeat after me, feel free to modify it, it's going to work great. And for everyone listening on the podcast, I will explain the points. Do your best. If you don't get a point perfectly, the process is not ruined. It's not an exact science. So we start by tapping on the side of the hand. We call it the karate chop point. It's the outside of the hand below the pinky. So you take 4 fingers of one hand, the other hand, whatever feels comfortable, and you just tap on that meaty part of the outside of the hand. And then you're going to tune into that anxiety. We want to stay in the field, the thought process of that thing that we're working on and just repeat after me. And Jim, will you be my echo on this?

I will.

All right. So tapping on the side of the hand continuously, even though I feel all this anxiety, Even though I feel all this anxiety, I choose to relax now.

I choose to relax now.

We're gonna do that 2 more times, still tapping on the side of the hand, tuning into that anxiety. With all this anxiety in my body, all this anxiety in my body, I choose to relax and feel safe now.

I choose to relax and feel safe now.

And one more time. Even though I feel so much anxiety about this, even though I feel so much anxiety about this, This event.

This event.

This upcoming thing.

This upcoming thing.

I choose to relax and let go now.

I choose to relax and let go now.

Now we're going to tap through the points. The first point is the eyebrow point. It's on the inside of the eyebrow, right where the hair ends and it meets the nose. And you can tap with 2 fingers of one hand, the other hand, or both hands. The meridian runs down both sides of the body, and you're just tapping gently. And repeat after me: this anxiety.

This anxiety.

Now we go to the side of the eye. It's not at the temple, a little further in, right on the bone. Again, one side or both sides. This anxiety.

This anxiety.

And now under the eye, right on the bone, tap into the points. And I want you to just start imagining this event. So if you have to give a speech, just think about it or see yourself doing it. Run that movie in your mind about the upcoming thing. If you're anxious about going to sleep tonight, run that movie. What does that look like? And just tune into that anxiety in your body. Now, under the nose with 2 fingers, tapping gently, running that movie. I want you to see it. I want you to see that movie, feel the fear, be present to it. If you have to give a speech, see yourself in front of 1,000 people. If you're an actor and you've got lines to give, see yourself doing it. Notice how you feel. Notice how your body feels. Run that movie. Under the mouth. It's above the chin, below the lip, and that little crease there. Tune into your body. Tune into that anxiety. If you get distracted, that's okay. Notice the other thoughts that are coming in, maybe wanting to distract you from looking at this and feeling the feelings. Go back to it. Acknowledge that anxiety in your body. Now for the collarbone point, feel for the 2 little bones of the collarbone and you go just down an inch out to each side. You can tap with all 10 fingers of both hands, feeling grounded and safe, and run that movie again. We're trying to fire that amygdala. We're trying to connect to that energy field in order to disengage it. See that upcoming event and just start noticing how perhaps at this point the anxiety has lessened a little bit and you're thinking other thoughts. What are they? Sometimes we start working on one thing and then something else comes up. That's okay. Notice any memories that come up. You could be thinking about speaking on stage and you think about when you were 10 years old and you were in front of the classroom. That's a clue. There's something going on there. This anxiety isn't just something out of the blue. It's manufactured by your body and brain from previous experiences. Allow those to come up now. Now under the arm, 3 inches underneath the armpit, either side of the body, right on the bra line for women. Keep running that event, being present with that anxiety or any other emotions that come up. Top of the head, right on the crown, tapping with 5 fingers, being present to that anxiety, to that feeling. Run that movie. Feel that anxiety in your body. Think the thoughts around it. And now we're going back to the eyebrow again and just allowing it to evolve. What are you feeling now? Ask yourself, what's this anxiety all about? See what comes up. Ask yourself, what would happen if I released this anxiety? Oftentimes we hold onto things and we don't know why, but there's a reason underneath it. Well, if I release this anxiety, then I would actually have to do that and I don't want to do it. Be present with that anxiety. Ask your body what it's all about. Ask why it isn't letting go. Ask how it's serving you and how you can release it. Under the nose. Run that movie in your mind again. Search for that anxiety. You might find it's getting lower and lower. Dig a little deeper, pull it back up in order to clear it completely. What are you anxious about? Feel it in your body. Feel it letting go. Under the mouth. Run that movie one more time. It's getting harder and harder because you're disconnecting and letting go. And some of you might be tapping along going, I just don't even care anymore. Notice that. Back to the collarbone. And as you find it getting less and less, you might find that naturally you see another image. So you see yourself on stage and you're comfortable and relaxed. You see yourself giving that presentation or going to bed and it just seems effortless. Just notice how you didn't have to will this picture. It came up naturally. You see yourself focused and flowing. Back to the top of the head. Being present with the good feelings that are starting to come up. And we'll do one more round on the eyebrow and repeat after me. It's safe to let all this go.

It's safe to let all this go.

It's safe to release any remaining anxiety.

It's safe to release any remaining anxiety.

Under the eye, and to feel strong and confident.

And to feel strong and confident.

Under the nose, feeling strong and confident in my body.

Feeling strong and confident in my body.

Under the mouth, feeling safe in my body.

Feeling safe in my body.

Collarbone: I've got this.

I've got this.

Under the arm: And I know that now.

And I know that now.

Top of the head: I've got this.

I've got this.

And you can gently stop tapping and just take a deep breath and tune back in. What we want to do after every couple rounds of tapping is check in, right? That was check in on your original number. So it was an 8. And now you're thinking about it and you're like, huh, anxiety is a 5 or a 4, or it's not there anymore. That was a quick example of the process. Jim, I saw you tapping with us and going deep.

I feel good. I actually had a very specific example of something that I have to do later today and I was feeling like a 7.5 and 8 around anxiety and stress. And, uh, and so I'm feeling pretty amazing right now. It's, it's at most a 2. So I wanted to mention to everybody, this is huge. It's this book right here, Tapping Solution: Manifesting Your Greatness. Tell me about the book. I'm so excited. I recommend everybody got copies of this. I recommend everyone gets 3 copies and gives them away.

Yeah. So, you know, what I did in this book, um, is take people through a 21-day process tapping every day. And it doesn't have to happen in 21 days. We actually have right in the beginning, you can sign up for email reminders to space it out the way you want it. Right? So some people are reading it every other day. And the chapters are short, and they're specific, and they're actionable. So it's, how do I take these steps? Because it can be so overwhelming, especially a lot of times when people discover tapping and they realize, oh my gosh, there's all these things that I want to change in my life. You know, like people say, I've got 50 years of limiting beliefs and traumas and things that I want to change. I broke it down. So we go, look, let's go one day at a time and let's build on it. You know, what do you do today? To then set the foundation for the deeper work. As an example, the first week in the process is really about just calming down that anxiety, like what we did today, that panic that we have. If we try to do that deeper work, if we try to get into that subconscious mind and and really establish a new vision for ourselves while we're panicked, it's just never going to stick. Right? So the first week is like. We need to take a deep breath. We need to start establishing patterns in our day and our thinking where there's now the room and the energy to create what we want in our life. And the second week, we clear out the old stuff like that, those limiting beliefs, the things that happened when we were 5, 10, 20, 30 that are keeping us stuck, the things that keep us doing the same things over and over and over again. And then the third week, once it's like, calm it down, clear it out, that's when we create the vision that we want for our lives. That's when we create the big dream. You know, we're often told, okay, establish a big dream or a vision and you like have to do it right now in that moment. And what happens? I mean, we've all had this experience. I know I have. You write down a big goal or dream and you instantly go, it's such BS. You know, you're like, it's never going to happen. I'm not this, I'm not that, or I'm overwhelmed. How am I going to get to it when I have all these other things to do? We tend to jump a couple steps ahead. So this book is specifically targeted to not only take you through the process, but to use the tapping to really break through.

I love it. I absolutely love it. Congratulations on this book, Manifesting Your Greatest Self. Where can people go? Amazon?

Amazon, Barnes& Noble, your local bookstore is always amazing. So we keep them running. Um, it's all around the world. Kindle version, you know, it's everywhere.

So Well, this is perfect for our listeners because they love things that are bite-sized, that are practical, something that they could dive into for 10 minutes and incredible change after a few weeks.

Yeah.

I think people grossly maybe overestimate what they could do in a day, but what they could do over the course of a few weeks or a month, it's absolutely amazing. So, I highly support that. I think everybody go get multiple copies of this and make sure you get 2 copies to be able to gift to a friend. 'Cause I'll thank you for it big time. Nick Horner, thank you, buddy. Thank you.

It's been such a pleasure.