Smart & Simple Financial Goals with Nicole Lapin & Jim Kwik

I'm really proud to introduce a very close friend of mine. She's been on the show before. She's a multiple New York Times bestselling author, and her expertise when we're talking about reset is really wealth and finances. How many of you would like to, uh, to reset, uh, make a reset in that area? Okay, wonderful. I'd like to introduce to you my friend, and I just have one of her books, of her many books here. Nicole Lappin. Uh, Nicole, are you here? Yeah, you're so awesome. I love your energy.

I've missed you. Thank you.

Thank you for doing this. Um, when we were talking and we had all these requests, I asked people here— we have 1,000 people here live on Zoom, we have people watching all of our Facebook pages. Um, we're also— um, and so you're amazing and And you have had, I would imagine with all your clients, with your background in media, you have such a powerful presence with your, I know you have another book coming. You birth books like no other, I can't imagine. People are concerned about—

I just birth books. Yeah, Rich Bitch, Boss Bitch, Becoming Superwoman. I just signed a 7-book deal. Last time I was on your show, I was, totally adamant that I was closed for business. I'm like, Jim, you know me, like, I'm taking book birth control. I am tying my book tubes. We are donezo. And, you know, whoopsies, just got preggo with septuplets. So that's happening.

Well, I mean, it's so wonderful that you share. You're able to, through your books and through your platform, share incredible, usable, practical knowledge and You know, we're talking this theme of this conversation, and I know we only have you for a little amount of time. We're going to the top of the hour. It is really about resetting. You know, sometimes people— how many of you want to reboot 2020, especially in the area of your wealth and your money? And so Nicole, where do people start? I mean, like, have you seen a year like this before?

So first of all, the place to start is admitting you have a problem. Like a lot of recovery programs, that is always the first step. And I think we all have problems. Listen, I have more issues than Vogue. So you can't— the only problem you can't fix is the one you ignore. And Diana, I'm reading all of these amazing comments as we're going. Diana just said that she's scared of the numbers. And that's a really good place to start this conversation because so many people and women in particular tell me they're freaked out by the numbers or freaked out by the math of getting their financial life together. And I got to say that all of the numbers, all of the math, like a 5th grader can do. It is the emotional part that is the hardest part of getting our financial life together. It is the enemy between our ears. It is the mean girl or the mean guy inside your head that we have to tell to take several seats because, yeah, listen, we don't learn this stuff in school, Jim. I mean, we learn how to dissect a frog in some cases or the Pythagorean theorem. We don't learn how to do a budget or a tax return. taxes or a business plan, and that is bananas. But that's also no excuse for burying your head in the sand. You know, I grew up in an immigrant family, super broken home. Like, I didn't learn anything about stocks or bonds. Forget about it. Like, I didn't have a silver spoon in my mouth. I barely had a spoon of food in my mouth at times growing up. So like, if I could do this and I could join the language of money, I gotta tell you and everybody listening that I promise you can too. I'm the least likely person to not only get my own financial life together, but be talking to the world about it. I was on CNBC and Bloomberg talking to like the richest, most powerful dudes in the country. Me, the girl who thought her boyfriend in high school was gonna go into gardening when he told me he wanted to be a hedge fund manager. Like me, that girl, if I could do it, I promise you could do it.

That's amazing. I, we had this conversation with people in here about school and how they teach you these things like Pythagorean theorem, but not taxes, because there's no like Pythagorean theorem season. But we're not really prepared. So what would your advice be for everyone that's watching right now? Where do they start if they feel overwhelmed, if they feel confused, if they feel a little scared, you know, with where, where can we start? So looking at the numbers, not getting over that fear of it.

Getting over the fear of the numbers and breaking it down into baby steps. All of my books are 12-step plans, first because admitting you have a problem is the first step, but also that anything intimidating broken down into baby steps is much easier to tackle. And I think that when you're starting a reboot for '21, I think that a great place to start is to come up with a basic spending plan. I mean, I'm sure you're bringing on folks talking about eating and health and stuff like that. Think about a financial diet in the same way you would think about a regular diet. Allow yourself small indulgences. Like I argue for the morning latte. So many so-called financial experts and pundits and stuff tell you don't buy a morning latte and that's gonna be your ticket to financial freedom. Oh, hell no. Like that is the worst advice I have ever heard ever, ever, ever. That just doesn't make sense to me. You cannot deprive yourself into wealth. That is the wrong advice. Rather, if you allow yourself to come up with a spending plan in the same way as you would come up with an eating plan, it's not a crash diet or a fad thing or whatever's going on. I don't even know, keto schmeeeto, paleo schmeeleo. Like, you know, none of that stuff is sustainable. What ends up happening is you end up in the middle of the night noshing on a big old hunk of chocolate cake because you are so hungry and you are so deprived, right? We have all been there. So when it comes to getting your financial life together, allow yourself the equivalent of a financial Hershey's Kiss. Like, whatever it is, it doesn't have to be the latte. It could be the mani-pedi. But put that into your budget because what ends up happening, gotta say, time and time again, year after year, Jim, people will say, hey, you know, Nicole, I cut out the morning latte in the beginning of the year, January 1st, no latte, made my own coffee, messed with the filters, did all that stuff. But come April, you know, I was so good that I bought myself a Gucci purse. I'm like, what? If you just would have given yourself a small indulgence every single day, you would have stayed more motivated, you would have stayed more on track, you wouldn't need the Gucci purse. And so a basic allocation for a spending plan would be 70% of your overall take-home pay would go to the essentials. So I break it down into the 3 E's because I love alliteration. So essentials, Endgame and extras. So 70% of what you're bringing in should go to your housing, your food, your transportation, everything that's essential that you need to live on. And then 15% should go to your future self, your future Jim, future Diana, your retirement, your investing, your savings, all this stuff that basically you're putting your oxygen mask on first. You have to do that before helping others. Back when we used to see humans in real life and I would go on a plane and you and I would be on planes every week, they don't say that.

No.

On the plane just for funsies before we take off. It's totally true. You cannot be of service to anyone else if you are crashing and burning yourself. You know, a lot of women in particular will say, well, I want to save for my kids' college before I save for my own retirement. Girl, what? Like, that is not helping your kids. If you don't have— if you're eating cat food in retirement and you show up on their couch to live, that is not helping them. Put your oxygen mask on first. 15%, I'll say it again, a few questions have been coming in. So 70% generally, and by the way, like depending on where you live, maybe you don't have transportation. These are general guidelines going to the essentials. 15%, try to aim for that. I know it's hard, to the endgame. And then 15%, no more than that, to the extras. And I think now that we, we don't have, you know, the capability in some cases with the pandemic to even go get the latte or the mani, putty, you can bring that percentage down. They're flexible percentages. You know, if it's like binging on something on Amazon that nobody needs, then try to keep it in that extras category and know that it's there. So you're not sneaking it. It's above board. This is like, you know, when companies come up with a big budget, then they're allowing themselves for lunches out with clients. You know, they put all of that stuff in there. It's not sneaky. You're accounting for it. So yeah, infrared saunas, whatever does it for you. I'm not going to tell you how to have fun. But when the fun money is done, the party is over. And if you're just starting out, you know, I would say kick it old school. Take that money out in cash. The cash is done. It's over. You know, back in the day, I used to swipe, swipe, swipe thinking like, oh, I'm going to do some mental math. I think I'm kind of like in my budget zone. And then it just feels free, right? Especially when You know, it's Friday night and whatever. Swipe, swipe, swipe sometimes doesn't work. So just be really honest with yourself, have good self-awareness of where your shortcomings are, and you can always correct for those.

I just want to comment on your energy because we're getting it on Facebook, we're getting it on Zoom, and it's infectious. Thank you for that. Self-awareness is a superpower. I think everyone should write that down. Because you have to do an audit, you kind of check in with yourself. I love alliteration, so thank you for that. I tend to, from a memory standpoint, as a memory guy—

Oh, I have more if you want it. I have F words.

I love F words.

Okay, let's be very careful. Let's be very careful. This is our podcast.

No, no, not those kind of F words, Jim.

What are you talking about?

Family, finance, and fun. What were you thinking?

Like, perfect.

Those were mine.

Food.

Food too, no, I mean, but coming up with your goals, like, all kidding aside, people will say to me, I just wanna be a millionaire, okay? I'm like, cool, what do you wanna do with that million dollars? Maybe you need more than a million dollars. Maybe you need less than a million dollars. I have no idea. First figure out the life you want and then reverse engineer to figure out how to get the money to live that life.

But first you have to figure out what those goals are and I break them down.

Into the three Fs, sometimes four Fs, and the last one being fitness. And so family finance fund broken down into one three five seven ten year increments because it feels more manageable. I used to get so much anxiety when people would ask me like, "What do you want to be in ten years?" Or "What do you want to do in twenty years?" I'm like, "Oh, I have no idea because I didn't answer the question." Once you answer the question, studies have shown that people who create a cohesive narrative for themselves and their lives are more likely to be.

successful.

So answer the question. It could change. You know, when I first started this, the family goals year 1 was like, go on a date. Seriously, that was my goal. I mean, that was it. And so especially when it comes to family goals, nothing is more time, money, and energy consuming than children. So I don't care if you want 10 kids or 10 cats, just figure it out and account for that. And then you can reverse engineer and figure out how to get the money to live that life. And maybe it's $1 million.

Maybe it's not.

You speak as quickly, faster than I do, which is a testament.

I know, I want to get in so much information because you were like, it's only 20 minutes, but I have so much to say.

I know, I know. And I recommend everybody check out also Nicole's books. I just happen to have one of them here that I just grabbed off the shelf, Becoming Superwoman. Your other books—

I have to get you a new one. That was the old—

No, no, I have a lot of galleys that you sent me over the— Over the years also.

Absolutely.

Just for that $20, Jim.

I approve.

Rich bitch approved.

Order it now.

All right.

What's the biggest mistake people are making right now with their money? You know, or one tip you would think about for 2021, you know, where things are going. I know there's a lot. Your energy is contagious, Nicole. You are the best.

Money is awesome. Like, people are so freaked out by money. And I'm like, I'm sorry, money is amazing. I've had money, I've had no money, and I And I can tell you that having money is way more fun. So I think we need to reframe our mindset around money, come to a place from aspiration, not deprivation. And I truly think your finances will follow. Like, it's total BS when people say think thin to be thin. Like, that's also not my category. That doesn't work. It's like eat less and go to the gym, right? But when it comes to finances, your mindset matters so, so, so much. And by the way, All of our relationships, if you want to get to the heart of the issue, it's usually about money. It's the conversations with our spouse about money. It's telling how do we get our friends to pay us back about money. Those are the things that trip us up the most. So trying to get over that. And then block— for blocking and tackling, I would say think about negotiating everything, all of your bills, the APR on your credit card. Can y'all like— I don't know how to do this. I'm Terrible with the Zoom stuff, but can you sort of vote and tell me how many people have negotiated the APR on their credit card, the interest rate on their credit card? I have a feeling that not a lot of people have, because every time I used to go to events in real life, you know, not a lot of hands would go up because they would say, oh, but it comes on a fancy piece of paper with a letterhead from a bank, and so that must be gospel. Oh no, no, no, nothing is gospel. Like the worst thing that they will say is no, but the answer is always no if you don't ask. So the APR on your credit card is huge. If you can get a few percentage points down, then that makes a world of a difference. That's like more than all the lattes in all the land for all the people on this Zoom call. So focus on getting the percentages down. Think about negotiating medical debt, all of your major bills. My favorite sport is negotiating. It's like the only card Cardio I'm doing these days anyway. So once you start getting into this, you'll feel like your hard-earned money—you might as well fight for it. And once you start getting yeses, you'll just want to do it more and more. And of course, you know, negotiating for your salary, negotiating for a raise—you can still do that during a pandemic. I have unconventional advice. I have unconventional advice, as you know, in general. But about that too, where I would say throw out the number—we've often been told like not to throw out a number because you're negotiating against yourself. But I say throw out a ridiculous number. If you're negotiating your bills, throw out a really, really low number or maybe even zero because you'll never get there if you don't start where the conversation is. Usually you land in the middle, but throw out the most ridiculous number when you're negotiating in any way, high or low. Oh wait, I can't hear you.

Ah, so here we go. The power of mindset. We talk about mindset a lot in, in, in my work, uh, because you could have this incredible method for doing it. But what's the mindset usually people have about money? Is it something— what are the lies people tell themselves that hold them back, that make them sabotage? Is it that they don't deserve it? Is it— are they have a fear of success? Do they have a fear of failure? Um, do they procrastinate with their taxes or procrastinate with calling their credit card company to negotiate? What's the impetus there that has to be dealt with inside?

It's all of those things.

It's I'm not worthy, I'm not good enough, a guy will figure this out for me. It's burying your head in the sand. It's like not stepping on a scale because then it's not real. It's not opening your bills because it's not real. I mean, I think that again, the biggest enemy is between your ears when it comes to that and changing your mindset. Is everything. I think that when we start having that negative self-talk, then we just get ourselves more and more in a hole, and it's harder to get ourselves out of debt. It's harder to grow wealth, and we cannot grow wealth if— you take nothing else out of this conversation, but you will never budget your way, you will never save your way, and your salary will never be enough to grow wealth on its own. You have to get into the investing game. So My first book, Rich Bitch, I talk about a 12-step plan to get your financial life together finally. And so that is budgeting, renting or buying a house, leasing a car, which I think is the biggest scam in the history of the world, but that's another Zoom, or buying, investing, retirement, insurances, trusts, wills, all of that stuff, all of the basics. My book that's coming out in '22 that I'm finishing now, that I'm birthing now, will be about how to grow wealth. And that's really The next step of this, you know, getting your basic financial life together is awesome. But in order to create wealth, not only for yourself, for your family, you have to get down with the idea of investing. Just think about it this way. Inflation in general is growing at 3% a year. So even if you put your money at— like, forget about the mattress thing. I know that's like so cliché. You're not putting your money in a mattress, but maybe you're putting your money in a bank and you're getting diddly squat right now because interest rates are low, which is great for buying a house, but not so great for when you're getting the APY. I've seen some of this conversation. It's true. APY is when you get money from the bank. APR is when you pay money to the credit card company, for instance. It's a little more complicated, but that's the gist of it. You're not getting 3% right now. So essentially, you're losing money. You're losing your purchasing power just by leaving money in a bank. And over time, I look at long Big datasets. I'm such a nerd and, and look through the numbers so y'all don't have to. Like, you're welcome. You know, stock market returns generally, let's say 10%. That's being generous, depending on what you're investing in. 10 minus 3 is 7. So net-net, you're getting 7% if you're investing. If you're not, you're getting negative 3% moving forward. So it's really important to understand that you cannot budget your way into wealth, and that should ultimately be your Dude, that's amazing.

That was the fastest 20 minutes ever. I think people are going to want to watch this replay in a bag.

No, do not grab a guy with assets. A man is not a financial plan. No, no, no, period, end of story. Nope. It is— I gotta say, I, again, I'm the least likely person To grow wealth, to be talking about money. There is nothing more satisfying than feeling the confidence of being a self-made woman. And so, yes, I would love to actually birth human babies at some point or find a partner, but that's not a necessity. That's something not that I need, but it's something that I want. And that comes to You come to a great place of self-worth when you create your own worth and your own wealth. And you don't deal with a lot of stuff, by the way. A lot of women, and this is a serious conversation, stay in terrible relationships, abusive relationships. I've heard all the stories because they're too scared to make money on their own. Please call me if you're in that situation. It's not as scary as it seems. And you can always, always put your oxygen mask on first before helping others.

I love that, Nicole. You are such a light and an example for so many people. I love this personal responsibility. I mean, I have this— I don't know if people can see it if they're watching on video— this picture of Stan Lee all the way on the top here, and it just reminds me of this phrase, you know, with great power comes great responsibility, and with great responsibility comes great power. I think it's so important when you take responsibility for your finances, for health, for any area of your life, for learning, you have great power to make things better. But it starts with that ownership. And that's amazing, Nicole. Thank you so much. How can people stay in touch with you? How can they find out more about your awesomeness?

Well, please, you know, and I think in addition to that, Jim, the last thing I'll say is that, yeah, money is a language like anything else. If we went to China and we didn't speak Chinese, we would be confused until we spoke it and then it wouldn't be that confusing. The same thing goes with money. We just don't have a Rosetta Stone for this growing up. So that's my goal is to make sure that this conversation is not as intimidating as it feels because once you can speak the language of money or Wall Street, then it doesn't feel as intimidating. And so that's the first step. Look at it like a language. Look at it like you're learning any language. Duh, it would be confusing if you didn't speak it. So in the back of all of my books, I have dictionaries. Maybe this is why I'm single, because in the back of Rich Bitch, I have a dictionary that you don't need a dictionary to understand about finances. So like short is not the opposite of tall, it's the opposite of long in the financial world. It just means something's going in the pooper. Equity is just a fancy word for stock. Like that's it. It's not that complicated, guys, I promise. And so Rich Bitch, if you're just starting out, It is a great place to go. Boss Bitch is my second book. Becoming Superwoman that you've held up that you need the real version of is my third. And The Money School, you can go to themoneyschool.com because I was— I just, as you heard, go on this rant about why we don't learn this stuff in school. And so I did it for so many years that I was like, oh, I'm just going to make my own school. How about that? So themoneyschool.com where I'm the least likely professor, but it's It's 12 modules of videos, quizzes, worksheets, like the whole thing. We get into it.

And it's great when people have that literacy then, or the languaging, then they can't be also as easily taken advantage of because there are forces out there that will make you give up your sovereignty to somebody else as opposed to taking that power and that responsibility.

Absolutely. I think once you join the conversation, you can fully be empowered. Like I said, I thought I was going to smile and nod and not join basic money conversations for my entire life and just be blissfully clueless until I needed a job and I got myself into debt, which I talk very openly about, and I needed to figure out how to get out of it the hard way. And I was offered a job on the floor of the Chicago Knowing nothing about finances, and I was like, "Wow! I figured out harder things in life. I think I can do this," which I did. I thought the Chicago Merc was a mall, by the way. And so, so that's how I learned how to speak the language of money. Then spoke it to world, now teaching other people about it. But but once you speak that language, I'm telling you, stop smiling and nodding. Join the conversation.

Yeah, let's do it.

Everyone take a screenshot of this conversation right now, whether you're watching on Zoom, you're watching Facebook, wherever you happen to be watching it. Tag Nicole, tag myself, and share. What do you want them to share in the post? Because I feel like when you teach it, you get to learn it twice. But what can they share with their fans, their family, their friends when they, when they repost this dialogue we're having? Like one challenge or one idea. Or something that they're doing, what's one thing they could do? Small simple step.

Small simple step. KISS is actually a great simple step, is keep it simple, sister. You know, I know that we've heard it the other way. I would never talk to my audience that way. Like, keep it simple, sister. Like, it's actually not that complicated. If you're just having a conversation before this about a basic asset allocation, and it's just taking your age in bonds is the best way to start. So I'm 36, so I would take 36% in bonds roughly and the rest in stocks if I'm looking into my 401, which is a great time to do, or looking into any other investments that I have. So it is, it's like really keep it simple. You don't have to go into all this complicated stuff. I get so many questions about like Bitcoin and crypto and forex. Like, no, just index funds and chill.

Y'all, I want that on a shirt. Index funds and chill.

Warren Buffett, one of the greatest investors of our time, said that the greatest advice he would give is to put your money in low-cost S&P 500 index funds, which is basically taking a whole bunch of the S&P 500, which are the biggest 500 stocks.

We need so many more sessions, Jim.

You asked me for one phrase and I'm going into like this whole monologue about the The stock market. But yes, index funds and chill, or keep it simple, sister. You pick.

And so thinking is good.

I'm a little Latin, that's where it's from.

Yes, thinking is good, but overthinking and wanting to be perfect, it ceases all progress. So break it down. Inch by inch is a cinch. Yard by yard is too hard. Check out Nicole on social media. You could tag her, tag myself. I'll repost some of our favorites. I'll actually send a copy of Nicole's Nicole's latest book to one random person just as a thank you for sharing. And Nicole, thank you for being the superwoman and wearing the cape that you do.

Goodbye. Thanks, Jim.

Appreciate you.

I'll come back anytime.

Yes.

Thanks, everybody.

Hi, Kwik Brain. It's your brain coach. I want to thank you so much for watching this video. 3 things to do. Number 1, make sure you share this because when you teach You get to learn it twice. Update your learning so you can update other people's learning as well. Number two, make sure you subscribe to this channel so you don't miss a thing. Because if you miss a video, you miss a lot. And finally, make sure you hit that bell so you're notified and you find out when we put out the latest and the greatest. One extra thing: If you want really close attention, then text me. Here is my phone number: three one zero two.

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