Networking Tips By Joe Apfelbaum

Asked me several questions about networking, and I figured I would just create a LinkedIn Live to answer the questions that the person asked me and see if I can get your feedback as well in the comments below. So the first question was, is offline networking still important in today's day and age where people are meeting on LinkedIn, they're meeting on Instagram? Why do you go need to go meet in person? There's something special about getting to know somebody face-to-face in person. We all know that most of communication is outside of language. Language is only a very small part, like 7% of communication is actually the words you're using. The rest of it is tonality, body language, intention, the feeling, the energy. So when you're meeting somebody in person, The in-person networking allows people to build personal relationships and create a deeper connection. Sometimes just being that face-to-face communication really opens up a whole nother level of trust. So when you can meet people in person, I believe that it takes the relationship to a whole new level. Last night I had dinner with one of my networking relationships, a client as well. And it's just different. Meeting in person is just very, very different than just talking on the phone or meeting through Zoom. Although those things are important, if you can also have a practice to meet people in person and having that different experience is very powerful. Also, especially during the pandemic when we were all just in front of the screens the whole time. Things can get very like fatigued. And so mixing it up and going to in-person events is really powerful. The other question that I was asked was, how do you get over the fear of walking into a room of strangers? Well, whenever you're walking into the unknown, you're going to have fear. So in order to make the unknown known, you want to prepare a little bit. If you want to eliminate the fear, you have to prepare. That rhymes, write it down. So how do you prepare? The way that you prepare is you research the event. Like for example, if there's a website, if you can look at the list of who's going to be attending and look up the people on LinkedIn, asking the person who invited you what the format is, just really understanding what you're walking into. I remember the first time I walked into a BNI event, I didn't know what was going on there. And I didn't know what to expect. The second time I went to an event, I already knew what to expect. So I had a lot less of a concern about what's going to happen. If you take a look at the agenda, you'll feel like you have more control. Also, the other thing that you can do is really focus on your goals. When you're not sure what you want to get out of something and you just go to an event, you're gonna end up having fear because maybe you're not going to get What you came to get. And if you don't know what you came to get, you're gonna have that like sense of uncertainty. So remind yourself about why you're attending the event, what you hope to achieve, and really stay focused on that goal. Your goal might be, I'd like to meet one person that I follow up with and build a relationship with, or I'd like to have one new connection that's in the position to refer business to me. I'd like to practice my elevator pitch in front of at least 10 people. Whatever your goal is, remind yourself what your goal is. And if you're still scared, let's say you prepared and you know what your goals are and you're still afraid or you're scared, then it makes sense to repeat positive affirmations, like things about yourself, like, I'm confident, I'm capable, I'm really good at building relationships. If you say that to yourself, You're gonna end up feeling like you are, even if it's not 100% true. And right now you're not feeling like that's true. Just saying it alone will make it even more true for you. It also helps to bring along someone like a wingman. Bring somebody along to be your person. Have a friend in the room. And also, if the idea of walking into a room where there's 200 people seems overwhelming or scary, Maybe go to a small event. Start with walking into a room where there's 5 or 10 people, and those smaller gatherings are usually much more comfortable. If you can't find something that has 5 people, like an event, make your own event that has 5 people. And the other thing I always tell people is act like the host when you go to an event. Start welcoming people into the event. If you're nervous, it'll make you feel a lot more comfortable, especially when you start realizing that people are more nervous than you are. Also, in the beginning, right when you walk in, you're always going to feel a little jittery. So take the time to kind of settle in. Put your stuff down, walk around, make yourself comfortable before you start really engaging in conversations. Don't go right into it. Even if people see you and they start saying hello, say, just a moment, I'll be right back. I just need to settle myself in. And take a moment to kind of get settled. It does take 5 or 10 minutes sometimes just to get settled in a room. And to kind of get comfortable with what's going on and who's in the room and just take a deep breath and get your business cards ready and get like your stuff in order and know where your stuff are and just kind of get coordinated. Maybe even go to the bathroom, wash your face, wash your hands, and then walk in and then you'll be ready. So you got to get ready. If you fail to prepare, you may as well prepare to fail. That's a famous saying. And so with that, the next question is, how do you prepare for an offline networking event? Like, what is it that you need to prepare? Of course, doing research on the event, like I just mentioned, thinking about your goals, but also thinking about like making sure that your LinkedIn profile is updated in advance. So people are going to look you up on LinkedIn. I mean, that's what people do these days at networking events. If you go to any offline networking event, The first thing people do is say, hey, let's connect on LinkedIn. They pull out their smartphone, you pull out your smartphone, you got your QR code going. If you're not sure how to find the QR code, you open up the LinkedIn app, you click on the search button on top, and then on the top right corner of the search button, there's a little QR code. Try it out when you get a chance and let me know if you tried it out. You can even take a screenshot of it and put it in the comments of this video, whether you're watching this on Facebook, on YouTube, and wherever. you're watching this, or on LinkedIn. The other thing you want to prepare is an elevator pitch. Before I go to every networking event, every in-person networking event, I prepare an elevator pitch. The last time I went to a networking event, I brought myself a little bird whistle, and my elevator pitch involved a bird whistle. The time before, my elevator pitch involved Illuminati. It's like a dress that you wear in Tulum. Every single time I go to a networking event, I think about my elevator pitch. Sometimes it's a poem, sometimes it's a rap, sometimes it's straight up talking about a new product or service or giving a tip or sharing a stat. But if you prepare your elevator pitch before, you're going to be more prepared. You're going to know what to say. Also dress appropriately. If you feel like you're not dressed up properly, you're not going to feel good about yourself. So whatever that means for you, first impressions are important. So make sure that you feel good in what you're dressed up like. And also business cards. I think it is important to bring business cards, at least bring a virtual business card. If you don't have printed business cards, you can go online and you can sign up. You can go to ShareCard or WinLocal. You can find they have really great business, like virtual business cards. In terms of what to wear at an offline networking event, really, for me, I like focusing on being professional when you go to a networking event, especially if it's like a business networking event. So like business casual is fine. Some people like wearing suits and ties. I'm not a very big suit and tie person. But if the venue calls for a suit and tie, let's say it's a really fancy black tie venue, then, you know, if I'm going to like a hotel ballroom or something really nice like that, I'm probably going to wear a suit and a tie. Or at least a suit. I don't know about a tie. I really stopped wearing ties. But if it's like a restaurant or a sports bar or like a golfing thing or whatever, then you probably want to dress a little more casual. And also just think about being comfortable. You know, you— I know there's a dress code, but you want to feel comfortable. Sometimes I'll go to the Harvard Club and I'll wear a sweater instead of a suit, and it's fine. Plenty of people wear sweaters, especially in the winter. And in terms of business cards, I mentioned earlier that you should bring business cards or a digital business card. Make sure that your business card demonstrates your professionalism. So don't have one that you printed in your printer. I'd rather have no business card than have a crappy business card. But the virtual business cards are really the way to go. And I do think it's still important to have a business card, something to hand out. I like using my book as a business card. So sometimes I'll bring books with me to networking events. You could use other swag, other material that you could bring with you. I have hand sanitizer that I take with me to networking events or pens, and then I hand those out. And also I take selfies with people. That's almost like my calling card. And then I send it to them via text message. In terms of elevator pitches, when creating an elevator pitch, I do think it's important for you to have an elevator pitch, but I think it's important for you to kind of keep it short and make sure that you're focused on the benefit that you provide to people. Like you don't have to tell people every single thing you do, but really focus on your unique value proposition. Like, The number one question people are having in their head is like, what's in it for me? So if you can create a little mystery in your elevator pitch, not even telling everybody every single thing that you do, but make them think to themselves, wow, this person could really help me. That's the key. Also, like knowing who you're talking to. An elevator pitch to students is very different than an elevator pitch to marketing directors, which is very different than an elevator pitch to CEOs. So you really wanna think about your audience. And you also want to practice your elevator pitch. Don't just walk into a networking event and have the elevator pitch that you've never said before. So I like saying my elevator pitch, like reading it 10 times and then saying it 10 times just out loud. And you could record it and listen to it also. So I would definitely do that. So say it at least 20 times, 10 times by reading it and 10 times by saying it without reading it. And listen to your recordings and see how it feels. An elevator pitch could be as little as like 10 seconds, 15 seconds, or it could be as long as 30 seconds to a minute. Try to keep it as short as possible. People don't really have long attention spans, but keep it interesting. Most people say, hi, my name is Joe Apfelbaum and I work for X, Y, and Z company, and that's their elevator pitch. No one's going to remember that. What you want to do is you want to start off with a bang, start off with a way that people remember you. Use some type of a hook, use a fact, use a stat, ask a question. And then of course, end with a call to action. Tell people what to do. Tell them to connect with you on LinkedIn. Tell them to raise their hand if they want to learn more. Tell them to do something because at the end of the day, people need to be told what to do. When it comes to what to talk about with people at a networking event, if you don't really like a person, if you don't feel like, oh my God, I really like this person, then you can keep topics to the sports, the news, the weather. You can keep it really simple. I like asking questions. If you like the person, ask them about their interests, their professional interests. Ask them about their industry, their hobbies. Ask them about what's going on in their community. Talk about mutual connections, people that they know or that you both know in common. Talk about who they know at this event. Like, one of my favorite things to do at networking events when I'm talking to people and say, hey, who else should I talk to in this group here? Who else in this room do you know that you had an interesting conversation? Who's the most interesting person in the room that you think I should talk to? Or who do you think in the room can help me? Here's my goal. This is what I'm trying to do. This is what I'm looking for. And you'll be surprised. Everyone knows one person in the room that you should talk to. And if that person sends you to that person, now you have a reason to walk over to the next person and have a conversation with them. And finally, the last question is, is networking really worth it or is it a waste of time? Networking is only worth it if you're going to follow up. Whether you're looking for a new career, whether you're looking for, say, business opportunities, whether you're looking for personal and professional growth, or you're just looking to build relationships, you can benefit a lot from networking. Every good thing that entered into my life, including my children, came from a relationship. My business partners, all the different things that— all the ideas that I have Came as a result of me having conversations with people, came as a result of me networking and building relationships. So I want you to take relationship building seriously because it can really change your life. Ask yourself the good things that are in your life. How did they come about? How do you know about the things that you know about? Why are you in the business that you're in? How did you get your last massive client? Was it through building relationships? Ask yourself that question and then ask yourself, is it worth it for you to take this seriously? I actually wrote a book called High Energy Networking. If you want to learn more about my networking strategies, it even has the 10 Commandments of networking. So if you go to highenergynetworking.com, you could learn more about it. I appreciate you taking the time to watch this video. And if you found it useful, just drop me a line and let me know that you watched the live. You can send me a direct message on LinkedIn by going to joelinkedin.com, or you can email me joe@ajaxunion.com. And of course you can forward this video to anyone that you think might be helpful. Give this video a like, leave a comment below. Let me know what you got out of this, and I'll see you on the next video.