The Real Reason You Haven't Hit Your 2021 Goals (Yet) 😱

Difference between setting goals and achieving goals. And most people set goals, but very few people achieve goals. Hi there, Forbes Riley. Nice to have you on. So everybody follow Forbes Riley. She is a goal achiever, not a goal setter. Right, Riley or Forbes. So what's the difference between setting goals and achieving goals? Everybody has goals, but very, very few people understand the. What I like to call is the neuroscience of goal achievement. Everybody's got the science of goal setting. What do you think? The number one reason is that people who set goals don't achieve them. We all have the desires, the goals, the dreams. Right? We all have that. But why do so few people not achieve their goals? Whether it's financial goals, health goals, relationship goals. What do you think might be happening here in your brain, not in the plastic brain, but in your particular brain? What's going on? So lack of consistency, like what's causing the lack of consistency? Right. Setbacks. Everybody has setbacks. Discipline. No. You're 100% disciplined to your current habits. You have 100% discipline. Right. So if you want to learn how to set goals. I don't know, Lbys go to my YouTube video on setting and achieving goals. So what do you think is the number 1, 2, 3 and 4? So Kathryn, you hit one nail on the head. Poor self image. So are you saying Katherine? And this is a comment from Instagram. We're streaming on four different platforms now. Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn and YouTube. And so do you think self image has anything to do with whether you will achieve your goals and dreams? That's a yes or yes question. Of course it will. If your self image is not in coherence with the goal that you want to achieve, you'll sabotage your success. Right? So ask yourself this question. When you were born, were you born with a self image? Hey there Steve. Were you born with a self image when this, you know, thing was developing, you know, in uterus? Right. Were you born with a self image? You know, an image of yourself, of what you could become, what you could achieve, what you can have, do be, give. Did you have any self concept when you were born? No, no, no self image? Zip, zero, nada. You were an open slate. So we're talking about four things that are preventing you from achieving your goals and dreams. I just did a live presentation to a group of lawyers from around the country who are looking to level up their law practices. And when I shared this with them, they were like, oh my God, we're smart, right? We're lawyers. Now, is it possible that if you set A goal, say, to double your income in the next 12 months. Right. If you set a goal to double your income in the next 12 months, you can set the goal. Right. Using that left prefrontal cortex, the Einstein part of your brain that can choose. Good morning, Mildred. The Einstein part of your brain that can choose the goal, the Einstein part of your brains that can imagine what having that goal would be like. And even you can activate that limbic system part of your brain, right. Which can come up with, why do you want to achieve that goal? So you could spark that motive for action. So you can have the vision and the goal and the motive for action. But is it possible that if your hidden self image is disconnected from that goal, that you think that maybe you're not worthy of that goal, that you don't deserve it, that you're not smart enough, that maybe you're going to have some neural dissonance or chaos in the brain? What do you think? Do you think that that might be one of the four things that's holding you back? So if your goal is up here, but your self image is over here, is your self image part of your subconscious conditioning and is setting a goal part of your consciousness? Decision making. Right. Conscious decision making here? Self image part of the habitual part of what we see ourselves. Right. So if there's a disconnect, what do you think the behavior is? When there's a mismatch between your self image and your self worth and maybe your self esteem and the goal, what do you think the behavior is? All right. So, Shelley. Yes. Neural dissonance occurs. You like this, by the way. I get into the neuroscience and neuropsychology. Right. So neuroscience and neuropsychology, there is a process. Would you agree that your brain is a network? Right. There's actually three key networks. It's the salience network, the default mode network, or your automatic self and the executive network. Right. So it's three networks. There's a few more, but three main networks. And would you agree that your brain has circuits that turn on or off as a result of certain stimuli? Right. So IG live with Angela. Avoidance, procrastination, self sabotage. What about rationalizations? You tell yourself rational lies. Why today you shouldn't do what you need to do you think that that might have an impact on whether you achieve the goal or not? Hi there, Emek. Right. Do you think that might interrupt the behavior or motivational circuits? So if we have goals that are up here and a self image that's over here, which do you think wins most of the time? Self image, subconscious or conscious vision, goals and reasons why? Which one do you think wins most of the time? Come on, you know the answer. Most of the time self image will win. Now what if you have a healthy self image, right? What if you have a healthy self image? And thank you Mr. Mike Edwards, I appreciate that compliment. So what if you have a healthy self image? What if you have a healthy self worth? What if you have, you know, healthy self esteem? You hold yourself in high regard. Not egotistically, not from ego. Okay, from just healthy. You know what, you're a human. You are the creation from the creator, the creative force. So you have a healthy self image. You know, what do you think happens if you have a healthy self image? And what do you think happens if you have. Actually I'm going to ask the question instead of telling you, I'm going to tell you. So what do you think the number two reason why you may not be achieving your goals in 2021. Hi there alluring. Hello there D49 from India. Tell me where you're from by the way. Yeah, I'll come back to the number two reason in a second. Number two by the way, every Tuesday morning at 9:00am Pacific when we started today, which is 12:00 clock New York and 5:00 clock in London, I do a 30 minute free session here and then every Monday night, which was last night, I do a session on Clubhouse on for two hours as well. And usually I have some guests. So where are you from? Tell me where are you from? Type in the chat right now. Where are you from? Sparta, New Jersey. From the Philippines. From Iran. From India, Portugal, Arizona. Love it, love it, love it. Do you like these sessions? This is impromptu, fun. I usually have a topic that I want to talk about. Give you lots of stuff to do. Right? You do. Hello there Israel. Shalom. I hope you are safe in Israel and hope the Palestinians are being safe too. Crazy. What's going on in the world. Why can't we just get along and live together, right? Like why can't we just love each other and get along and be in peace with everybody being able to practice what they want to practice without hurting anybody else, right? Like maybe a little energy and prayer to everybody in the Middle east right now and anywhere else in the world where there's oppression and wars and stuff that's going on, right? So thank you for letting me know where you are all from. I love it. Ontario, Canada, the uk. All over the world. So we discovered that self Esteem. If there's a disconnect between our vision and goals and self esteem, Self esteem will drag us down, procrastinate, sabotage, rationalize. Those are the causes. Or the self esteem is one of the causes that holds us back. All right, so, number two, what do you think the number two thing. Yeah, if you like this, hit the like or the love button. What do you think that the number two thing is that can hold you back? And again, I'm talking about neuroscience, neuropsychology. Your brain, your brain, your brain, your brain, your brain, your brain. Network circuits turn on, off. Motivational circuit, fear circuit, stress circuit. Right on, off. Certain things are gone, signals. Other things are. Stop all that. Protect yourself. That's the way your brain works. It's an organism. I know you see my face and my nose and my eyes and my teeth and my skin. And if you took that off and my hair and you got my skull and you took the skull off, you'd end up with this. This is what's doing all the work, right? So, number two, what do you think? Number two is old pattern. So E cool. E cool. Got it right. Number two reason. Fear, Cheryl. You got it right. Also, I'm looking at a couple screens in front of me. So fear. But what is fear? Is fear something that you should fear? No. I want you to imagine as you're driving down the street in your car and a light pops up on the dashboard. A light pops up. Have you ever taken a hammer and hit the light? Cause you don't like the light? Of course not. That would be silly, right? What if the light on the dashboard was just a signal? Maybe you're low on tire air, air pressure. Maybe you're missing air or water in your windshield wiper. Maybe the back trunk door is open. Isn't the signal in your car just for you to be aware that maybe something is wrong or something needs attention? Is it possible that if we stop thinking of fear as the enemy, Fear is one of your biggest friends. Why? Well, when you understand how did this organism develop and how does it keep us alive? It pays attention to things in your external world. Triggers from your external world that could cause your death or destruction. It causes you. You to do what? When there is a potential threat, predator or threat at the door, it lights up. The fear signal sends cortisol, epinephrine or norepinephrine into your bloodstream. So you either know how to fight it, you run away, or you freeze, hoping that the predator will go away. So when your brain, every brain, Gets this signal that there is a threat at the door. It sends a signal in the form of a neurochemical that you feel. Now if somebody feels this threat in their body, but they don't know how to manage the emotion we call fear. Let's say there's a fear that you have a failure and what it might mean to your family. What about a fear of losing money and not having enough to pay the rent, the mortgage or for retirement? What if there's a fear of trying something and then it not working out and you're embarrassed or ashamed or ridiculed or rejected or judged? Oh my God. If you judge me, then you're gonna reinforce my low self esteem of myself and then holy shit, then who am I? You understand what's happening in the circuits I'm just describing? So when our brain has this fear circuit activated, do you think the fear circuit causes you to go, oh hey, let's take action anyway. Or do you think it goes high alert, high alert, high alert, Be aware what's going on. What if you fail? What if you succeed? What if you succeed and fail? Whenever that circuit is triggered, motivational circuit shuts down. Whenever that circuit is activated, your thinking circuit circuits shuts down. All the blood flow goes into a part of your brain to help you do what? Possibly run away. Protect yourself. It's a protection mechanism. But here is what I want you to remember. This automatic trigger and circuit has been evolving for millions of years. But your specific experiences since you were born in the modeling experiential and the and the imprinting years caused you to have beliefs about things. Some empower you, some disempower. Let me give you an example. Let me give you an example when I say the word. Or let me give you a different same example with just a little different story. If I say to you that I'd like to take a big snake about 5ft long and let it slither across your arm and around your neck and it's a python. How many of you go oh wow, that would be great Versus how many of you are going oh my God, let me run away, get it off of me. Just think of a snake slithering on you and curling itself around your neck. How many of you are like run versus oh my God, that would be great. Can you take a picture of me with it so I can put on social media? So is it really the snake that is the threat? Or is it your concept in your brain, the meaning that you have associated with a snake that is activating for some of you, the reward center, and for others, the fear center. Same steak, same stimuli. There isn't even a snake here. I just add, you think about it, right? And it triggered that fear circuit for some, reward circuit for others. So it's never about the thing. So when we have fear of being embarrassed, ashamed, ridiculed, judged, fear of disappointing ourselves, fear of failing, fear of succeeding, there's 50 different types of fears. We automatically trigger the circuit that does what stops our action taking. By the way, for those of you that want to learn more about this with me and some other brain experts, we have a brain a thon this Saturday that you can sign up for. It's free. It's about six, seven hours of training with me, Nurka, Dr. Dennis Waitley, who worked on the Apollo mission with Neil Armstrong in the day. If you want to learn how to master your mindset and your emotions so you overcome the things that hold you back, sign up for the brainathon. It's free. My team will put up a link in the chat on the different social channels that I'm on or in my bio on Instagram. And you can sign up for it. Watch an hour, watch to watch three. You get some amazing training on how to eliminate all this stuff. So number two, okay, number, number two is fear. Number three, okay, number three. Number three. Can anybody guess what number three is? Can anybody guess what number three is, we've talked about self image could hold you back. Fear can hold you back. There's 50 different types of fear. What's number three? What is number three? And by the way, fear is triggered in your subconscious mind, okay? Fear is triggered in your subconscious mind, releases neurochemicals that you consciously feel. And if you don't know how to manage your feelings, you try to move away from them. Okay. By procrastinating self sabotaging, rationalizing, drinking alcohol, taking pills, or being addicted to suppression versus expression. So anyway, Shelly, awesome that this will be your third brain thought. So what's number three? What's the number three thing that can hold you back? There's only four. There's only four things. There's not 25 things. There's only four. Mohic procrastination is an effect. Okay, so why are you procrastinating? There's a reason we procrastinate. So let's not focus on the effect, let's focus on cause, which is all the work that I like to do. Right. That's why I do the behavioral neuroscience research. To understand what's driving behavior or not taking Action. Let me ask you a question. Is not taking action to achieve your goals a behavior? Is not taking action to achieve your goals a behavior? And, Paul, distractions is an effect, right? So is not taking action a behavior? Come on. Of course it is. Right? If you agree, hit the like or the love button. All right? Is not taking action a behavior? Of course not taking action is a behavior. So, Reena, you hit the nail on the head, right? Beliefs. But is it just beliefs, Rena, or is it limiting beliefs? If we have constructive, positive, empowering beliefs, we move forward and take action. But when we have a limiting belief, like, I'm not good enough, I'm not smart enough, I'm not worthy, I'm not skilled, I'm too young, I'm too old, I'm too white, I'm too black, I'm too Asian, Caucasian. I'm this or I'm that. I'm not enough of this, I'm not enough of that. Where are our beliefs? Right. We have two types of beliefs. We have conscious beliefs that we can declare, and then we have subconscious beliefs as well. Which ones are the more powerful of the two? Mike Edwards says subconscious beliefs. Right, Mike says subconscious beliefs. Were you born with any beliefs? Like, if you were a neuroanatomist. Okay, if you're a neuroanatomist, if you were to look in the brain, where would you find your beliefs? The positive, the negative ones, the good ones, the challenging ones, the construct of destroy. Where would you find them? What are they like? What are they like? What are they? Aren't those patterns that have been reinforced based on what we learned in childhood aren't those patterns that our parents gave us? Our teachers, our brothers, our sisters, our neighbors? Right? Didn't we develop our beliefs through the imprinting years, 0 to 5 or 6, the modeling years, 5 or 6 to 7 or 8, and then the experiential years all the way from birth to 25, 26, when our brain was pretty plastic and we developed these beliefs about what to believe. We weren't born with any. They're nothing more than neural patterns in the brain. Now, how many of you have heard the word neuroplasticity? Neuroplasticity, Right. What is neuroplasticity? Neuroplasticity is the scientific fact that our brain is. Is plastic. Right? What does that mean? It's not like plastic, like this brain. It means that we have brain cells, right? So the brain cells, okay? There's a cell, there's an axon, okay? Or a body. Then there's dendrites at the end, right? And there's synapse gaps in between the brain cells. So those brains have potentiality. And let's say we are told that you're not good enough, you're not smart enough, you're not worthy, you'll never amount to much, you're too young. You, you don't have enough knowledge, you don't have enough skill. If those patterns are created and those neurons are active and releasing those neurochemicals from a receptor or from a ascending neuron to receptor neuron, and that happens often enough, that neuron structure or pathway becomes more solid, just like developing a highway system in a city. And the pathways that are active and reinforced when we are young become the default pathways, just like the highways and the roads that you take every single day to go to the stores you take. Now, if it's true that our neural pathways are not fixed, but the pathways that are easy to run across, okay. Or to fire the signals, okay. Are the ones that are dominant. Is it possible to let go of the limiting, destructive, disempowering beliefs that somebody else gave us for the most part, or we experienced? Is it possible that through conditioning, programming, deliberately choosing our beliefs and reinforcing new neural pathways, we can create new neural pathways? Right. So if a neural pathway can be created and neural pathways can be deactivated, then why not deliberately and consciously evolve yourself? Right? So we've talked about self esteem getting in your way. We've talked about fears getting away, we've talked about limiting beliefs getting in your way. And in the next five minutes, we're going to talk about the fourth thing that can get in your way. So is it true that if you were committed to achieving your goals, you could change your beliefs, you could augment your self image, you could learn how to manage the emotions of fear that are holding you back and the habits that you've created. Is it possible to do this now? It's not possible if you're just interested, but if you're committed, you can do it, right? If you're committed, you could learn how to solve this Rubik's Cube, Right? If you're committed, committed, you can solve. Okay. The Rubik's Cube conundrum, Right? I love Rubik's Cubes if you're committed, not if you're interested. Right. Because how to solve the Rubik's Cube is just about learning the algorithms, then practicing. Right? And part of practicing is failing, because that's how your brain learns. Can anybody guess the fourth reason that you may not be hitting your goals in 2021. And as I mentioned before, if you want to change your brain so you can change your income, which will give you the time, freedom and choice, freedom to do what you want to do in your life and retire when you want to retire, sign up for the Brain a thon this Saturday. The link is going to be in the chat. The link will be in the bio on Instagram if you want. It's going to be about six, seven hours with me and some other world renowned brain experts and it's free. Come for an hour or two or three or four. Enjoy, you know, invite your friends. There are over a million people that have joined us for previous brainathons. So join us this Saturday and on the link that my team will put up for you, there will be all the information that you need. All right? Hi there, Ben. Hi there, Gool. And hi there, Laura. So what's the fourth thing that can hold you back? Like, what's the fourth thing? Like, there are only four. Everything else could be. Okay, so negative self talk is an effect, right? And effect. So gyro habits. Yeah, but habits are effects, right? So what causes habits? Got to be committed, not interested. Yes, Laura, you are correct. Hi there, Ravi. Hi, Nikiti. Hi there. Hi there. Hi there. Okay, so let me, since we only have about four minutes, what do you think happens in your brain? You set a goal. I want to earn this amount of income, I want to make this much profit, I want to travel the world, I want to invest in real estate, I want to buy real estate or invest in the stock market. I want to start a business, I want to grow my business. I want to lose weight and keep it up. I want to have a better relationship. I want, I want, I want, I want, I want. What happens in your brain? If you have a vision and goals and you have a big why and you don't know how to achieve it, you don't have the knowledge or the skills, what do you think happens? Remember we talked about the brain's an organism, that's a network, okay? With circuits that turn on or off. When you set a goal that you don't know how to achieve, you don't know how to do it, what do you think is triggered in your brain is your trigger of let's dive in. Do you think that since your brain wants to protect you? All right, so David says indecisiveness, self doubt. Maybe the fear circuit is triggered. Maybe lack of confidence, circuit confusion, maybe overwhelm with all the possible Things to do, right? So if your brain is in a state of confusion, if your brain is in a state of unknowingness, does that create confidence and certainty and personal power or apprehension, self doubt and you retract into safety. Which one do you think is going to happen for 99% of people? Are they going to retreat into their comfort zone or are they going to go gangbusters and take a chance? So here's what happens. When we are lacking the knowledge and the skill, we activate that sympathetic nervous system, okay? Which causes a feeling of self doubt, of lack of confidence, of lack of certainty. Yours and my brain, if you haven't listened to anything, listen to this, okay? Yours and my brain is a prediction computer. Let me explain. It is predicting every second. How much glucose do you need? How much energy do I need? Enough fuel in order for me to, you know, to think and feel and have enough fuel to run away and to protect myself in case of an emergency. So it is in a protective mode most of the time, in a conservation mode most of the time. So it's predicting, okay, your safety, your survival, the avoidance of pain, discomfort, etc. So whenever there is uncertainty, whenever there's uncertainty, because I'm lacking the knowledge or the skills, it activates the fight, flight, freeze or faint circuit. Fight, flight, freeze, yes, Faint circuit. Okay. And when the fight, flight, fear, fight, flight, flee or faint circuit is activated, do you think that is a productive pattern or a destructive pattern for most people? Right. So I want you to understand that if you really want to achieve your goals, whether it's financial, health, relationship, career, we all have this amazing hundred billion dollar brain, but we're not very good operators of what we already own. That's like having a private jet and you don't even know how to call a pilot to help you get in it, to take you wherever you want to go. That's like having the car of your dreams, but you don't know how to drive it. That's like having the most incredible computer in the world to be able to help you achieve your goals. But you don't even know how to turn it on, let alone use the programs. So I'm inviting you to be a better operator. I'm inviting you to upgrade your knowledge, upgrade your skills, get better at what you already own. And guess what? You'll be able to achieve your goals and dreams faster and easier. Not fast and easy. Faster and easier than ever before. All right, if you've enjoyed this, would you mind sharing this? I hopefully have given you Lots of stuff in 30 minutes to think about if you want to achieve your goals. I really couldn't give a hoot about setting goals. I want you to become a goal achiever, not a goal setter. Everybody has goals. Few people achieve goals. I just shared with you a few things to help you achieve your goals. You are imaginable. You are like an amazing human being, genius level human being. But maybe you are just not activating your genius that is already there. It's not like you have to buy more genius. You don't need to buy more genius. You already have more genius than you'll ever use. Why not use what you have? All right, so if you want to join us this Saturday, join us this Saturday. We'll go deeper into all of these with other world renowned brain experts. Experts will give you tools, tips, techniques, resources on how you can become a better operator. It's called the brainathon. It's the 8th annual Brain A Thon. The link will be in the bio on Instagram. We'll put it on YouTube and Facebook and LinkedIn and everywhere else we are. And if you like this, please share this. I want to help a billion people achieve their goals in my lifetime. And it doesn't have to be me helping a billion people. If I help you, if. And you help your children, you help your significant other, and you help your, your coworkers or your employees and people in your community by being the best version of you, I will be able to reach a billion people through some of my passion, which is helping others achieve their goals and dreams faster and easier than ever before. So click on the link, sign up, share it. Let's have some fun. I appreciate you. How about a high five? Boom. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, Boom, boom. 30 minutes, power packed. Boom. Have a great day, Great evening. No matter where you are in the world. I appreciate you. Leave me a comment. All right. Leave me a comment below. Did you enjoy that? And again, share it, share it, share it. Thank you. Bye.