The Skill of Self Confidence

When you upgrade your self confidence, you upgrade your self trust. When you upgrade your self trust, you're more likely to take action instead of having doubts, fears, anxiety control you. Does that make sense? Happy New Year. Are you ready for an amazing 2022? Have you done your planning? Have you done your organizing? Have you done everything for 2021 as far as reflecting? And are you ready to level up your skills and your self confidence for 2022? How important is self confidence in achieving your goals? And what really is self confidence? A lot of people talk about self confidence, right? Of course it's confidence in self. But what causes you to have confidence in yourself or not have confidence in yourself? Is self confidence huge? There's a couple of questions. There's a lot of research around self confidence and when do you think self confidence begins in life? When do you believe that self confidence begins in life? You're not born with self confidence, you're not born with certainty, you're not born with self worth. You're now born with self esteem, right? Is self confidence something that may even be considered a belief? Something known as an implicit belief? Right. An implicit belief is an underlying subconscious belief. There's two types of beliefs that is worth mentioning. One is called an explicit belief. It's a belief that, that you can express. Right. Explicit, outward facing. But another belief is an implicit belief. I am implicit belief. Hi there, Shelley. Hi there, Ann. Hi there, Michaela. Cheryl Barber. Nice to see you. Happy New Year, Cheryl. Happy New Year. Vishesh. Right. So implicit is more internal, subconscious. But where does that stem from? Let me give you an example. Let's say you give yourself a New Year's resolution to, let's say, get in good shape to make more money, to get out of debt, to start exercising, to stop eating too much at night, whatever it is. Let's say you give yourself that directive and for one day, two days, five days, right? You do a great job and you build your self confidence, you augment your self image of yourself and you also build some self trust. You trust yourself right? Now, what happens if on day six or on day 10 or day 14, you stop doing what you promised yourself, what you committed to yourself that you'd be doing, what you made a New Year's resolution about what happens, okay, to your self confidence, your confidence in yourself, do you think it increases or decreases? What do you think happens now? Obviously you know the answer, right? When we tell ourselves we're going to do something or follow through something, or stop something, or start something, and we do it and stop. And do it and stop. We lose self confidence. And when we lose self confidence, is it possible that that starts to formulate our self identity? Our identity. Hmm. I'm gonna have you thinking a little bit here. Right. So why do we lose self confidence? Like when we talk about self confidence, it starts in childhood, right? It starts when we are kids, when we do stuff. Okay. When we fail, if we quit, we start to develop the identity of a quitter. And when we identify as a quitter, we start to formulate beliefs that match the identity and story of a quitter. When we do that, our self confidence wanes. And that's when we start looking to other people more than we look to ourselves. So here's a question for you. What do you think might be a good inner size. Inner size. Right. To do on a daily basis to augment your self image, self worth, self esteem, self confidence, which are all intertwined. Hi Zelina. Nice to see you. Right. So what do you think happens? Okay. If every day. All right. If every day you make a commitment to doing one thing that you follow through on, it doesn't matter how small it is. When we create and Jasu, when we create micro commitments, micro commitments. All right, micro commitments. And we follow through to completion, our brain doesn't really care or know the difference between something big or something small that we've accomplished in the nucleus accumbens, an insular part of the brain, the reward center part of the brain. Anytime we. We activate that reward center of completing something that we start completing, something that we start completing, something we say we're going to do, we augment, lift up, increase our self image, self worth, self confidence, confidence in self. So do you have a history of following through to completion of on your goals, no matter how big or small or you do some you stop. You do, some you stop, you procrastinate, you sabotage. Let me give you an example of something my wife and I just did every year. Every year we'd like to add a new habit or get rid of a disempowering. Add a new empowering habit and get rid of a disempowering habit. So this year, while we were away on our little end of year vacation and reflection time, we said, what can we do for 100 days? I have 100 day rule. Okay, let me make a note. I'll tell you about my 100 day rule. Hold on. 100 day rule. I'll talk about that in a moment. 100 days. So we made a commitment that for 100 days we're going to do planks, right? You know, planks to, to get our abdomens really nice and tight and get the core of our body. So when we made that commitment, we just said, since we just made the commitment, let's get down on the floor right now and do one minute of a plank. Just one minute. And she does Pilates and I exercise. And it wasn't a hard thing to do. But we knew that if we're going to make a commitment to 100 days, why not start right now? So to prove, to show and to experience the commitment, we just went and did it. And by the way, we're on like day 10 now. So we actually started even before the new year. And why did we make a commitment to 100 days? Can anybody guess to what. Why we do 100 days? And many of the people in my community, communities, my client communities, you know, they're doing 100 days right now. Okay. Of commitment towards something. Right. And so why 100 days? Well, let's go into the brain. Okay. Right. Lots of different components to the brain. But are you aware that when you take an action, any action, when you do it one time, of course, you're firing the neurons, the brain cells that send electrical and chemic signals across the synapses, right. When you do something one time, that it's good, I mean, it's good to get the benefit of that one time. But when you do something a hundred times, do you think that when you fire those neurons, if it's true, based on Hebb's rule, that the neurons that fire together wire together, and the neurons that wire together in a repetitive spaced manner become more automatic than the sporadic once in a while firing of the neurons? Do you think that's what we might call is a habit? Hmm. Here's some of the latest scientific research. It takes approximately 66 days to 365 days. Let me repeat. It takes between 66 days and 365 days to formulate a strong enough pattern right. In the brain so that it goes from conscious effort to non conscious or habitual patterns. Let me repeat. It takes between 66 days and 365 days for a pattern. Self confidence pattern, self worth pattern, self esteem pattern. Okay? A habitual pattern to create enough of a strengthened neural network for it to go from conscious effort to subconscious automatic triggers. So why do we do, you know, 100 days of any activity, any thought pattern, any emotional pattern, any behavioral pattern? Why? Because if self confidence is nothing more than a reinforced neural pattern in the brain, can you upgrade your self image, upgrade your self worth, upgrade your self confidence, upgrade your certainty levels, upgrade, okay, your self esteem so that achieving your goals becomes easier and easier and easier. Self confidence isn't about what you say. Self confidence comes from what you actually repeatedly do or don't do. So if you repeatedly do the things required to achieve the goals, then you build self confidence. If you consistently start and stop, you, you decrease and break down your self confidence. When we develop self, it's like a muscle. Self confidence is like a muscle. If you use it, it gets stronger. If you don't or you start to stop, start to stop, start to stop, start to stop, it gets weaker. The reason I wrote my famous best selling book Inner Size is because we can create a pattern every single day to build neural networks and muscles. So can you use the occipital lobe, all right? Can you use that visual cortex in your brain to create a neural pattern? Yes or yes? Think about this. Many years ago when my good friend Dennis Waitley was working with Neil Armstrong, who was the first man on the moon, right? Why did they use visualization to go through every single facet of what was in the capsule? Why did they use visualization to see himself getting out of the capsule and walking on the moon? Why they use visualization to go through every single maneuver? Well, here is why. Pay close attention. Visualization is simulation. When we visualize, we actually fire off the neurons, okay, in our brain. And remember what I just said? The neurons that fire together wire together. And the neurons that wire together become habitual. And the habitual patterns reinforce themselves without any effort, right? So if you just joined us, Happy New Year. We're talking about self confidence, self worth, self esteem, right? And you know, it doesn't matter if you're an Olympic athlete, a Navy seal, an entrepreneur, if you have a job, you want to, you want to have a better job. If you're a homemaker, when you upgrade your self confidence, you upgrade your self trust. When you upgrade your self trust, you're more likely to take action instead of having doubts, fears, anxiety, control you. Does that make sense? Does that make sense? So visualization is simulation. And perfect practice is what makes perfect patterns. If self confidence is an implicit subconscious belief, what drives our behavior, what drives our results, right? What drives your behavior? Is your behavior driven by what you want to do or is your behavior driven by your subconscious patterns? It's subconscious patterns. So let me ask you a question. If you were to how many. Do you have a car, by the way? Do you have A car? Do you have a car? Yes or yes. Do you have a car? I think most people have a car, right? Or most people get into a car. If there was something wrong with the car, are you equipped to fix it? Like are you a mechanic that can do a diagnostic on the car and then fix it? Most people go no. Like I certainly can't. The only thing I can do is turn it on, put in drive, reverse park, put gas in, go, windshield wipers, heater, air conditioning, easy. But if something happens to the car, I need to take it to a mechanic. I want you to accept this metaphor. Your brain is $100 billion brain. It has got three major networks. Salience network, executive functioning network, default mode network, and then numerous circuits. Fear circuits, doubt circuits, stress circuits, anxiety circuits, panic circuits, motivational circuits, confidence circuits, lack of confidence, circuits that turn on or off all the time. So all of this stuff happening beneath your level of awareness that if you don't know how to recognize your patterns, how to reframe the disempowering ones, how to release the ones that are holding you hostile, cause you to procrastinate and not take action, or start and stop, or have goals and not follow through to completion, and you don't know how to retrain your brain, then join us on the brain a thon because we'll teach you how to become a better operator of your own brain so you are more empowered, have more confidence, have more certainty and have a way, a path to building your self worth, self esteem, self confidence. Because think about this. If you doubled your self confidence, could you possibly double your income in 2022? Like, I don't know about you, but my goal in 2022 is to double my income again from 2021. That's my goal. What's your goal? And I know that I have to make some changes, but the changes have to start on the inside versus the outside, right? You can make changes from the inside out or outside in, but when you do them both together, then guess what happens now you're much more equipped to achieve goals versus set goals. So can I coach you this year? If you want to be coached. I got a lot of free stuff. I also have a lot of stuff, obviously some amazing programs that you can look into if you want to go deeper and really get serious this year? Every year I look to make that year better than the year before. And I focus every year on my health, which means spiritual, emotional, mental, physical and financial health. Spiritual, emotional, mental, physical and financial health. I focus on my business. I Focus on contribution to help as many people as possible. I focus on having amazing life experiences. And if you follow me on social media, you know that I share some of our life experiences there with you. My wife and I love to travel, so do my kids. And we love to see amazing places and meet, you know, amazing people in the world. Share with me one of your biggest goals. Let me help you. Let me help you achieve your goals. And here's a question I want to ask you, and this is a really good time to ask your questions. Many of you have seen my exceptional life blueprint, right? And many of you have seen I have my family and I have some of my life in here and places I've traveled and stuff I've bought and things that I own and things that I. But I also have every area of my life written out so that I have clarity and focus. Now. Do you know why I do that? Do you know why I do that? Why do I invest countless hours on the clarity of my goals? Why do I invest countless hours, okay, on practicing the strategies and the skills? Why would I invest hours upon hours upon hours? And the answer is. Because that's how I prime my brain to have the image wired into my brain. Why do I set all my goals down? Because I want to avoid all the distractions and I want to stay focused on the clarity of what it is that I want to trade my life for. Do you know what you want to trade your life for? Because if you can write out what you want to trade your life for in health, wealth, relationships, career, business, finances, fun, experiences, contribution, charity, I can help you achieve that. Because I already have and I've helped tens of thousands of my students achieve amazing success. But they have to be committed. They have to be willing to go beneath just the surface. Okay? They have to be committed to achieving an outcome versus merely being interested in achieving that outcome, right? So if you are committed, join me on the Brainathon this Saturday. Learn with me, John demartini, Lisa Nichols, Marissa Peer, Jack Canfield and others and get committed to your goals. And why am I suggesting that you upgrade your knowledge and skills and training? Because that's how you build self confidence, is you make a commitment and then you show up and then you follow through to completion consistently. And if you make a commitment to yourself for 100 days, you'll start to build the habits required to achieve the goals. And then if you reinforce those habits for another hundred days, then those habits start to become fixed in your subconscious mind. And if you continue for another Hundred days. Then guess what? Then now you have changed your self confidence, self worth, self esteem, identity and you have taken actions to achieve goals versus just being a goal setter. You start to become a goal achiever. Which one do you want to be? A goal setter or goal achiever? Everybody has goals. Everybody has hopes and wishes and dreams. But not everybody's committed to achieving those goals. Even though they're capable of achieving those goals. Right? Even though they're capable of achieving those. There's something within you telling you you can achieve more. Right? Something inside of you is telling you I can achieve more. But something's holding you back. Is it possible? What's holding you back is your self confidence, self worth, self esteem. How do we reshape those neural patterns? By focusing on, on inner sizing your brain. You exercise, you know, your muscles, okay, to strengthen your muscles and your internal organs. But do you do any type of inner size, mental and emotional exercises for your brain to strengthen your neuro muscles of self confidence, self worth, self esteem, Right? Most people are interested, they're not committed. Even though you already own the most powerful tool in the whole universe, a hundred billion dollar brain, but you're not a very good operator yet. So why do I do the brain? A THON probably about 10 years ago, you know, I was working with some of the top, and I still do some of the top neuroscientists, neuropsychologists in the world, all right? And the stuff that they were discovering about the brain fascinated me. And I had been doing brain training for over 40 years or 30 years at that time, right? And I was reinforcing the positive, constructive, empowering patterns for so many years and I was achieving some success and tens of thousands of my students were achieving success. So I said, well, what if we could teach some of the techniques and tools and resources and share it with people all over the world. And so we did. And over a million people have watched the brain a thon in the last 10 years. So there's a link in the bio if you want to join this Saturday. Share the link. There's a link in the Facebook chat if you want to sign up for it. It's free. And meditation is a form, okay, of, of inner size. It's a single inner size. There's hundreds of different types of meditations you can do. But let's start making a plan to augment our self worth, self esteem and our self confidence. Let me know if you're in. Are you in for 100 days of augmenting your self confidence. 100 days of self confidence work, right? So, sure, go for a walk, get yourself some exercise. But let's also do the inner sizes, right? The inner size, inner size, the new science. Unlock your brain's hidden power. Are you in for doing 100 days of working on your brain? If you want to pick up my book, go ahead and do it. There's also some brain training audios in here. It's like $15 on Amazon. It's Amazon number one best seller. So pick up the book. Not only will you learn about how to use your brain better, but you'll also get nine brain training audios for free. They're worth about 200 bucks. Self confidence, self esteem, self worth, self image. Those four things are intertwined. When you upgrade those, you get healthier, you get wealthier, you have more fun, you have more ability to achieve your goals and dreams. All right, so bye, everyone. Thanks so much. Hey, this is John. And if you like that video, watch the next video because it is packed with things that you can do right now to achieve success way faster than ever before.