A Very Busy Octogenarian: Nonstop Living, Learning, and Loving

Welcome to the Living to 100 Club Podcast. Here's our host, Dr. Joseph Casciani.

Hello, I'm Joe Casciani, your host for the Living to 100 Club Podcast. Our conversations are all about aging well and doing what it takes mentally and physically to live longer and healthier. Our guests share insights and recommendations about successful aging, stories of perseverance, and inspiration about our future. Today's program certainly fits the bill. Our guest for this Living to 100 Club podcast is Jim Flaherty. Jim has lived a non-stop life and sees no reason to stop living, learning, and loving. Jim wants everyone to recognize every day as a miracle, an opportunity to embrace the magic of life. He reminds you today is the oldest you've ever been and the youngest you'll ever be.

That's right.

So let's make the most of it. Just a little background on Jim. Besides an award-winning career as an international advertising writer and creative director in New York City and Buenos Aires, Argentina, Jim created and managed a brilliant country and conference center in upstate New York. Home is 80 miles north of Manhattan, an art-filled converted barn with an interior pool and two adoring pooches. His new book, Dear Old Friends, a loving reminder: the band won't stop playing till you stop dancing. Exo Jim. Besides a memoir of a grateful life, the book gives you many ideas for aging productively and cheerfully. It's a friendly, easy-to-read book to help anyone learn how satisfying a long life can be. Jim says he greets every morning as a gift, an opportunity to learn and to share your positive outlook with others. He likes to quote George Bernard Shaw, "You don't stop playing because you got old, you got old because you stopped playing." Jim, welcome to our podcast.

I feel like I should tap dance in or something after that introduction. I actually, I did make a change after our initial meeting, Joe, I changed the— I love the subtitle of Dear Old Friends, Loving Reminder the Band Won't Stop Playing Till You Stop Dancing, but I decided it needed to be more pointed and I changed it to read, Stay Young, Stop Thinking Old, and Love Your Life Every Day. Because I wanted it to be right to the point of what I'm talking about.

Stay young, stop thinking old, and love your life every day. Every day. I like that.

And I'm going to spring another one on you today. Since writing and publishing that book— I published it last November, so it's new, it's new this year— I just finished the draft of a follow-up book.

Oh wow.

Which I hope to have out in a few months.

Oh wow.

And I'm, I'm in the same category, the title of the new book is going to say, it'll be a small line at the top that says, "Stop whining." Stop whining. And then the big title will say, "Acknowledge your age." And then underneath that it says, "You can be better than ever." Wow. Because I'm finding with many of my friends, as you all know, folks, I am at this moment I'm 86, but next month I'll be 87. Okay. So I'm 87 years old, basically.

Remarkable, Jim, and you're so productive and so spirited.

I love that. Yeah, no, life, hell, life is good. It would be boring as hell to sit around. One survey I read said that something, some horrible thing like 45% of all seniors over the age of 65 watch television 48 hours a week.

Yes.

And I thought, there's got to be more than— more to life than that. You've got to have a reason to get up every morning and get with it.

Yeah. And I think that same research also talked about volunteering, that the average person volunteers about 2 hours a week or something like that. We need to flip that, right?

Absolutely. Absolutely.

I always like to open by asking our guests to tell us briefly about the journey that brought you to where you are today. I mean, 86 years you've been around the block a few times, so give us the highlights, Jim.

We can even say '87. I'm really only 30 days away from '86 and 11/12. That's right. You know, I've had— I look back at my life and I've had such a good time. I have no regrets. I mean, it wasn't all sunshine and roses and a staff to wait on me and big wealthy money and trust funds. My father was district attorney of the city of Miami when I was a kid. That was very exciting. I was the DA's son. He, because medical science wasn't quite that advanced, he went in the hospital one Sunday and died the next Sunday at age 47. So we had no money. And I fortunately was, and I had no siblings, but I had a very smart, wonderful mother who gave me a lot of my good thinking. She said I have a lot of my father in me, the ability to communicate and to talk to people. But I remember my whole life, mother saying, guess what? You're not going to inherit anything. You know that, darling. And Nobody owes you anything. So if there's anything you want in life, get off your fanny and work for it and go for it. And I said, fine, I agree. And I was born or given the juices to become a very cheerful— and I don't even use it as a bad word— yes, I've been a workaholic. But God, it's It's so much better than being a do-nothing-aholic to sit around and—

Having to be drudgery.

So I scraped through college on scholarships and working, came to New York City, got a big job for $3,400 a year. After taxes, I took home $200 a month with no allowance from home, living in New York. That was 1957. And I lived in substandard housing. And did it hurt me? No. Maybe it made me understand the importance of a dime and a quarter, because in those days a quarter was something I really did not take casually at all. I went into the Army, and my wife must have been out of her mind. I met this lovely girl, and we got married 8 weeks or 9 weeks later. And when I was earning $80 a month in the Army. And why we all did things like that when we were that young, but we said, we really want to have children right away, right? So we had, within 3 or 4 years, we had our 2 daughters. One was born in Syracuse, the other one was born in Brooklyn. By then I'd gotten back to the New York area. And I had great fun. I loved having babies. That was fun. And then as the girls were growing and I was stepping up the ladder little by little, I laughed, Joe, you know, in this world where, you know, I think the starting salary at, I'm making this up, of course, starting salary at Burger King is $95,000 a year now. You know what I mean? The salaries are out of, just out of control. I remember coming home to my wife in 19, I had to be 38 years old. It had to be about 1968. Yeah, around 1968, I came home and said, we have it made. I had got a big promotion and I am earning, get this, $35,000 a year. We've got all, we're the Rockefellers. We've got all we'll ever need, right? Again, just working hard. I never knew whether I was brilliant or that I just had gotten in the habit from the time I was taking home $200 a month or when I was up the ladder earning $150,000 a year. I still went to work more than an hour early every day.

Sure.

And so by 3 years after that $35,000, I was earning $80,000 or $90,000. And this is something I actually recommend to people. If at some point in your life, and yes, you're not gonna do it when you're 85 years old or 87 years old, but as you're going along in life and somebody says, how would you like to do this? And it falls in that category of crapshooting with your life. At times it's really wonderful. Because it gives you a whole new spirit and a reason for being. And at age 36, and all my friends said, don't do this, Jim, you're going to take yourself out of the market and be stupid. I accepted a big job as creative director of J. Walter Thompson, which was then the biggest agency in the world, in Buenos Aires, Argentina. And the children were 9 and 11, and we moved 6,500 miles to live in a foreign language in a very strange world. That was when Perón came back and it was Barnum and Bailey time every day. But it was fascinating and it did change all of our lives. We became international. I still have one of my two daughters has lived 35 years in England and both daughters still speak Spanish fluently as do I.

That's great.

It became part of our life.

Sure.

Big world.

Yeah.

I came back to New York and was doing very, very well. And at the top, when I really could call my own shots, one day I bought an abandoned stack of stone and with one partner recreated it and opened a 4 or 5-star inn. And I personally ran it for 25 years. I was there at 7 o'clock every morning, dressed in tie, saying, good morning, did you sleep well? And running it. And we built it into, everybody said, "You're going to lose your ass, Flaherty. This is stupid." Hospitality business in a small town in the boonies. We were 82 miles north of New York City. And I turned it into a profitable operation. And the partner went out building homes, building custom homes all in the area. We live on the Connecticut border. I'm in New York State, but just a mile from the Connecticut border. So it's been a very, very good life. I've gone through a few tough years. My partner of many, many years developed dementia and I went through 3 years. He died last June and I went through 3 years of being a caregiver.

Caregiver.

Just taking care of him 24/7.

A different role for you, sure. Oh boy.

Yeah, that's a tough one. But again, it's something That's going to happen to us all, folks, one way or another. Hopefully you won't have to be a caregiver, but as we're getting older, we must always keep in mind we are in partnership with our partners, and they're there, and hopefully one of you is strong enough and well enough to call the shots and to take care of them. And if you're financially able, I urge everybody To look ahead, don't wait till the last minute. Get some, if you feel you're getting older and you don't have children around you or people that might be around to help you, hire somebody to come in and be part of your life.

I did that. Planning is so important.

I did that 22 years ago and I still have that nanny.

Yeah. Are you still managing the inn, Jim, or?

Oh no, Jesus was good to me and said, Jim, you know, you've been, you've been really a pain in the neck for many years, but I know you mean well, so sell it. And in 2016, before the world knew that, that the world knew that wonderful word COVID, that horrible word, after dancing for 3 years with a would-be buyer, a European family, very nice people with great taste, I sold the inn. Actually, I live across the street from the inn. I can't see it. Fortunately, I can't see it. But And it's beautiful. They're doing a wonderful job.

That's great. That's great. Yeah. So you've really been so industrious, hustle, and kind of determined, and really been through a lot of chapters. And I'd say accomplished a tremendous amount. And I just wondered, what do you attribute this tenacity to? Where does it come from, Jim?

Obviously, Joe, everyone has a different modus operandi. From day one, and I'm going to attribute much of this, mothers will be happy to hear, to my late great mother, who was very wonderful. She gave me a couple— It sounds a little corny, but I actually do it. She said, in the morning, first thing every morning, you are going to face your most severe critic, the toughest hurdle that you're going to have to overcome, the highest wall you'll have to climb. It's going to be tough. And it's going to be that person in your bathroom mirror. And you can look at that person and go, good God, another day. Or smile sweetly and say sweetly, good God, another day.

Yeah.

And I know it sounds a little corny, but I do that. Sometimes I do it even before I get out of bed. I say, good God, I woke up on the right side of the grass. And another day to get up. Isn't that good? And this morning I woke up, I had I didn't have anything booked for early this morning, so I set the alarm knowing that I always wake up before the alarm. I set the alarm for 8:00, so I thought, I'm going to sleep late this morning so I'm awake for Joe's podcast. I woke up at 5:30. I stayed in bed till 6:00 and said, hell with it, and got up and came into work and then had my all-fruit breakfast. That's, no, we'll change gears now. Folks, You wanna live a long life? Make, let's talk about health decisions. You're talking to the good doctor here, Joe, but only you could really make decisions about your health. And I made some very smart decisions. Some I made years ago. I stopped smoking 60 years ago. And when I turned 80, I thought, do I really need, is it really necessary to have a cocktail or wine? And it's very pleasant, but I don't really need it. And I stopped drinking. And I used my 80th birthday as a marking point to do that.

And the milestone.

And I also thought it's time to get some very, very healthy living habits. So I've cut meal, I couldn't do it during when I was cared, caregiving, it didn't matter. We ate whatever the partner wanted. I just wanted to make sure that he was all right. But for myself now, I have 2 meals a day. I have all fruit in the morning, no bread. We never have bread except for dinner parties. So Esther, my nanny, will cook some fresh rolls. But we go ahead and Turn that off. And I have all fruit and then I go down to our pool. I have a pool in the house. My house is a converted barn. It was a dairy barn in the '40s. And so I go down, it's one of the great luxuries of life, and I spend 30 minutes, whether I want to or not, 30 minutes every morning doing serious exercise. Not swimming laps, I'm doing, this kind of exercises, you know, deep knee jogs and using weights and do that 30 minutes every day. Then I go upstairs, not hot tub, shower, get dressed for the day.

Yeah.

Then dinner, dinner is between 2 and 4 o'clock. Dinner today was 3 PM. Today I had scallops on, on some risotto and a salad.

Nice, nice. Yeah. And then a little later A few bites at dinner?

No, if I'm hungry later on, I will have a dish of low-calorie ice cream. Some people do marijuana, I do ice cream.

Yeah, well, ice cream competes pretty well. Yeah, yeah. So it all starts with that first look in the mirror, right? And what do you say to yourself, and how do you label that image, right?

Well, and absolutely, in my new book I have a whole chapter. So do you want to know where your nearest psychiatrist is? In your bathroom. It's your bathroom mirror. And you should have discussions with that person every day and say, why am I screwing up? And listen to them. If they say, I did not like what you did yesterday, and say why. Talk it out with yourself. I really do. I say that was I'm not content with the way you handled that situation and how you can make it better.

Yeah, that's good. You stop and the awareness is really important. What could I have done differently? Mm-hmm. Gee, I really improved over what I usually said, or, you know, kind of—

Absolutely.

—help for that awareness. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Good. So, um, you were in advertising for many, many years, and I always admire and people who are in that, in that industry. What did you learn about the human spirit from your career in advertising, Jim? I mean, are we all— I loved it.

Yeah, well, I mean, I, I see so much every now— the companies and the agencies would hate having me because I wouldn't approve more than half of the work that goes out. As a creative director, nothing left the agency unless I signed off on it. So it makes you feel a little judgmental, a little godly. You're really in charge of what you think means good taste and good selling methods. I wanted interesting advertising. I used to read all the research about a product and their market, and that would help me get to a different point that we did not have to do what people were expecting you to do. And over the years, I handled things like Ding dong, Avon calling. Remember the Avon lady? I changed the Avon lady. And for 3 years, I handled that as a major campaign. And their sales went up 16% a year. And I opened them in 12 countries and had a wonderful time doing it and brought some humor to it. And they were lovely people too, lovely people to deal with. I had British Airways during the Concorde years. I used to fly back and forth to England. Those 3-hour flights a lot. I liked British Air. They're, again, wonderful clients to deal with.

So is your particular perspective, or I won't say slant, that's not the right word, but your take on how to do advertising in a tasteful way?

I wanted it to be tasteful. Respectful way. Your goal with advertising is, one, somebody's gonna, you're gonna have somebody for 30 seconds Or if you're a luxury of 60 seconds, if you're doing television. So you have to get their attention, and then you're going to inform them, and if you can possibly do it, entertain them a little bit by virtue of being— you know, I used to say to people, if you can write a commercial that makes somebody laugh out loud, or even get teary-eyed because of what you've done in 30 seconds, you really have an absolute winner. And it's going to sell a lot of products and make everybody happy. But don't just treat it as, here it is, another thing, but give this to your thing and put it under. It just, it gets stupid. You're dealing with people. And I always say, do you, I, well, I also say it in my books, do you Would you want to be your best friend? Are you anyone's good friend? And I say to, in addressing a market in advertising, do you, would you like me to give you this product? Would you like to have it in your home? I know, I mean, there's a, there could be a lot of research to it. Actually, if you saw the kind of strange TV series called Mad Men, which is about, which that really was the story of my life. I was much, much better behaved, I promise you. But, but, That was about a New York advertising creative director. That's right. That's the whole show, right? Sure. Yeah. Except as my friend Susie said, but Jim, it's true. People were getting drunk and you know what else in creative director's offices all over New York, not in yours. Yeah. Because I said, no, you have to have sanctity of place. My office was a place to do wonderful work and to solve problems. Just as I wouldn't tell a dirty story from the pulpit or have a cocktail party in the AA meeting hall, nor would I do unspeakable things in the Oval office. You have to have sanctity of place. Yeah, of course, of course. As you, as you know so well being a doctor.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it was really, um, uh, you were pretty immersed in that, uh, that world, just as Mad Men, um, kind of lived that life.

Yeah, it was, but it was fine, you know. Yeah, I, I enjoyed it. It was certainly not boring.

Yeah, so you have this, uh, what do we call it, just this kind of bottomless reserve of spirit and energy and tenacity. And you must have hit some potholes along the way. I always like to talk about potholes and how people manage and how we, uh, kind of recover from the potholes. Can you share some of those with us?

Okay, I will. Yes, there are potholes. And of course, you All the while, potholes or not, highs or lows, there's still life. And if you have children, life goes on and you cannot, as unfortunately so many people do, they run into problems and they ignore the children. That can't happen. You have to maintain a working relationship with your children and hopefully not get them hurt by it. My wife and I separated after 15 years. And it pained me terribly. It was, I guess, what you call eventually a friendly divorce. I took care of her the rest of her life. That I knew was necessary. I made sure she had a house and that she was okay. And meanwhile, educated the girls. And I'm very close to my daughters. My children are 60 and 62. And they're funny and they're bright. Talk about a difference, Joe. One is a scientist. She's a medical researcher and science writer, well paid for it. And the other one's a shaman. Shaman. So you have really opposite ends of the spectrum. Both writers, both have books out. And they each dedicated their first book to me. I said, you're just trying to make sure I don't change the will. They said, absolutely, we know.

So opposite ends of the continuum, and yeah, but they're great. You're the bridge between the two.

Yeah, they're great, and they're funny, knowing they love each other too, which is what I really like. Yeah, that's great.

So potholes, uh, potholes. Yeah, you've got to be mindful of the family and everybody that's depending on you, and you can't just throw your hands up, right?

And also, I think, especially as you're getting into relationships, husband and wife or boyfriend, boyfriend, doesn't matter what it is, you have to remember there's another person there and you're feeling pain, so is the other person. And I think you always have to try to look at it both ways. Interestingly, over the years, I was raised Catholic, then I drifted away. I became what I guess they call them lapsed Catholics. And lately, one of my new closest friends is a rabbi, rabbi in his life. And he's darling and he's funny as hell. And he calls me a collapsed Catholic. Because I'm an elder, meaning board member, a senior running a Presbyterian church here in Armenia. And the reverend and I are really close friends. And I said, you have me on the board because you wanted a hitman. That's me because I'm not famous for being real patient. I want everybody to get up, do it, get it done.

You got the target on your forehead. Okay. Yeah, right. Yeah. So that's okay, but it's fine. Okay. Yeah, yeah. So, um, the, the potholes, as you say, that's life. And you're right, there are, there are events that come along and throw us and turn our world upside down. And sometimes people say, um, you know, that's That's it. That's the last straw. I don't think I can take any more of these. Other people say, "Oh, well, I'm gonna have to dig deep and see what I can do to get through this one. I've got other people in my world, and I need to be determined and push forward." The bigger pothole for me was being a caregiver for 3 years.

I did it with love and caring, but they don't call it dementia, they don't call it the long goodbye for no reason. I basically said goodbye twice, saw somebody die in front of me for 3 years. Yeah, yeah, you know, it's very, very hard.

Well, it's been called the funeral that never ends. Uh-huh. Yeah, it really is.

And even when it does end, you still grieve. Yeah, grieve and mourn because you think, what else could I have done? Nothing.

Yeah, again, it's that awareness and stopping to say, is this, you know, me? Is this what I can do? This is my new role, this is my new— right. And, um, I'm gonna just have to keep pushing through it. Yeah, yeah. So tell us about your book, Jim, um, Dear Old Friends: The Role of a Lifetime. And Claire, you had, uh, Claire's a novel.

That's pure fiction novel. There's a novel. Yeah, there's romance and sex and Broadway and international travel, and there's a The first novel, The Role of a Lifetime, is also very— both Role of a Lifetime and Claire are both written around women. All the heroes in both books are women. There are men in them, but they basically are women heroes because I like women. Generally, I like women better than men. Yeah. Yeah. That's okay. And in most cases, I think they're smarter than men. I think they got the short end of the stick historically because it was, well, I'm going to go off and do my job, but you've got it easy. You can just stay at home and run the house and do the cooking and raise the children. Yeah. Yeah. We've reexamined that, haven't we? Yes. Fortunately, that's gone away, but that's okay. No, but the current books, the ones that I think are more relative to your audience, Dear Old Friends, And the new one coming up, Acknowledge Your Age. Acknowledge Your Age. Really? You know, they talk about, I know one of the things I talk about in both books, which I think is a very good mantra or a way to live. I was raised with the Golden Rule, something that started back before the days of Confucius. In one form or another, and it evolved into that good thinking but awkward language of do unto others as you would have others do unto you. And my mother raised me with that. And as I got older and was becoming a writer, I said, I like it, Mother, but I'm rewriting it. She said, you're rewriting the Golden Rule? Yes, Mother, I'm not rewriting the Lord's Prayer. I'm rewriting the Golden Rule. In a way that is meaningful to me and to my children so that they will understand it. So I rewrote it to 5, 5, because I, I said if you lay the, the classic Golden Rule on a 4 or 5-year-old, do unto others as you would have others do unto you, they'll go, huh? I mean, it doesn't, it doesn't ring. Yeah, mine is you get what you give. So If you give a helping hand, a sympathetic ear, a warm smile, a loving hug, that all comes back to you. It absolutely comes back to you. If all you do is criticize, demand, bitch, complain, that comes back and bites you in your hindquarters. You get what you give. Yeah. And I say to people all the time, part of my preaching to people. I even have preached in the church. That shows how far down the Presbyterian Church has gone. Is try it. I said, go out and tomorrow when you're in the grocery store, and those are thankless jobs, the girls stocking the shelves or the woman's checking out your food, smile sweetly at the checkout lady and say, oh, thank you so much for putting all the frozen good things together. Isn't it a nice day, nicer day today? And you're going to make her day better because you're not acting like a jerk the way so many people do. And she'll smile back at you. And she'll think after you leave, this isn't a bad job. And so in a small way, you've helped somebody else. And we all know the most generous form of giving is to give something to somebody not expecting anything in return.

Of course, of course. Sure, sure. So yeah, so that's the beauty. You say that, you, you offer that pleasantry to the, you know, the person behind the register, and yeah, you make her day, but she also in turn will offer something positive to somebody else.

Yeah. Oh yeah, no, absolutely.

It doesn't stop with her. It continues. It doesn't stop with her.

I never I never fail to say, well, good morning, when I'm stopping for iced coffee on my way to choir practice on Sunday morning. That is the one morning I'm on my own. And I live in a small boonies town, more blue-collar town than not. And I'm dressed to the hill. I'm dressing in French cuffs and a coat and tie to go to church. But I'm also acknowledging my age now. I was always the one to open doors and to carry suitcases for people. And now people say to me, knowing, they look at me and say, oh, look at that old guy. And they open doors for me. Somebody gave me a seat on a train the other day. And I said, well, thank you very much. I didn't turn it down.

Hell no. Yeah. Or shopping at Home Depot and they ask you if you need some help putting that into your car. Yes, absolutely.

Yeah. I do.

I don't turn it down. So, yeah, a lot of good days. I mean, really positive, uplifting days. Do you ever have any down days? I generally can't.

I personally can't afford to get down for too long a period. I then, I go back to that bathroom psychiatrist of mine and say, what's the, what the hell is wrong with you? And try to do a self analysis on myself. And I found part of it, this past year, I would have moments of, I realized I was grieving or mourning. I don't know. I never know which word is correct. Something had come up and I was feeling alone. I'm very fortunate. I don't live totally alone because I have my nanny who's been here 22 years with me. She'll turn 60 in a couple of weeks. And she's Mexican, but she became a US citizen 2 months ago. So we're very proud of that. And she doesn't hover, but she's here. She has an apartment in the house and she's around, always making sure, am I okay? She never leaves the room without saying, call me if you need anything. I know that I'm not alone. And with the elderly, that loneliness is a tremendous cause, as you know, Joe. Depression. And I have 3 or 4 people that I'll call, they're all women, that I call every day or every other day and say, hi, talk to me, you know, what you doing? Yeah, sure, sure, you know.

Yeah, yeah. So you catch yourself before you start sliding back?

I, yeah, I can't do that to myself.

Yeah, people can slip back and before they know it, it feels like a dark place and hard to get out of that. But you catch yourself, that's great, that's smart. I mean, we all deal with these losses and disappointments and whatever, you know, the failures along the way, but it's easy to kind of get sucked back into those.

Well, and as we get older, everyone has to face the fact that we are not going to live forever. You know, it annoys me, there's so many things on my creative late. I have a half-finished screenplay that I really want to finish. I have created a TV series that I need to find somebody to get somebody to look at it. Okay. And I want to write another novel. And it, frankly, it pisses me off that I can't pound the table and say, well, I've got 20 more good years. Yeah. No, I don't. I'm hoping to have 5 more of really good years, but all of this still works. Because writing is the hardest non-physical job in the world, I think, because everything has to work. I can't— you can't say, well, I've slipped a little bit, I can go on writing. No, you can't. Doesn't work that way. Sure. But, you know, in the book, in Dear Old Friends, one of the chapters which I also talk to people I talk a lot about it. It says, the importance of passion. I said, you must, if at all possible, have a passion. They say, what passion, Jim? I mean, come on. I'm 78 years old. I'm 83 years old. I say, no, it's not the sweaty kind of passion. It's a more important passion than that. It's taking up bridge. It's learning a new language. New language. I always wanted to paint. Take a painting, call the high school, find out if they offer a painting class. There are everything in the world is now available online. I have one of my happiest stories. A friend of mine, she's 83 years old, and she read the book and she said, all right, Flaherty, just, just so you don't yell at me anymore. I was yelling at her because I said, you're becoming a couch potato. And it's stupid because I knew how brilliant she had been in her younger years. I mean, she was editor of magazines and, you know, I mean, real hot stuff. She's gone back to college. Yes, great, great. And I love it. She's 83 and she comes in, she said, the kids looked at me first like I was a reincarnation of Grandma Moses, and now they invite me to the library with them. She said, do you like the way I look? My, my— I went to the Gap with my girlfriend. I think it's great. Yeah, get some college clothes.

Yeah, yeah.

And they say, well, it is, it's, it's good, you know.

Age doesn't have to determine who we are, what we're doing, right? I mean, that's, that's so true, Jim, just to stay engaged and stay connected. And the, you know, the importance of meaning and purpose, passion, whatever you want to call something that puts a smile on our face when we wake up in the morning. This is what I'm doing. This is what I look forward to. I think that's so great.

Yeah, I had a, uh, and I'm, I'm, I'm sorry to say that I can't remember his name. There, there are two webinars I've seen lately that I really loved. One, one is, uh, he wrote a wonderful book that I know you would like, Joe, uh, From Strength to Strength. It is wonderful, excellent. And the other one, he was a doctor and he said, I want everybody, when we're through with this, I want you to sit down and encapsulate your life and who you are and what you are and what you do into a 6-word statement. I thought, into a 6-word statement? And so I thought about it for a long time and I have my 6-word statement. Yeah, let's hear it. Finally.

I am present, living, giving, loving. That's it. That's great.

That's what I want to be every day. I want to be present. That I get the word present. I must admit I'm a great admirer of Brené Brown. I'm sure you've heard her talk. And she says, you know, she uses that Teddy Roosevelt quote of, "Be in the arena." Yeah. Show up. Show up. Yeah. So I'm saying, I am present. I'm here. I don't hide out. You know, people have to cope with the fact that I'm going to walk in there. Yeah.

And yeah, you know, Twyla Tharp, the choreographer, has written some great books. And the last one was "Keep It Moving." And she talks about being out there, pushing yourself to be out there. And non-stop engagement. Good. It's staying engaged at some level with other people, with some activity, some passion, a language, a musical instrument, whatever it is.

I'm gonna look that up. That's— that's why I know who that is. Keep it moving, keep it moving. That's the title. Good. I'm gonna, I'm gonna look at that.

Yeah, good, because I loved her. Yeah. Well, we're just about out of time, Jim. I, uh, what would you like our listeners to take away from our conversation today? Well, I would welcome all of them.

I would invite all of them if they're interested in my point of view or my books, rather than directing them to each book, if they could go onto my website, which is a very simple one. It's just James, the initial B like boy, Flaherty, F-L-A-H-E-R-T-Y, .com, jamesbflaherty.com. That has all my books there and has my kind of my philosophy of life and things. I tried to make it interesting.

Okay, so it's a good place for people to go and learn more about you and access your books and your philosophy. That's great, that's great. Well, it looks like we're out of time, Jim, and I just want to, uh, thank you. But before we wrap up, Let me remind our listeners to visit my website, livingto100.club, to sign up for our email list and download a free copy of my 9 Tips to Make Living Longer Enjoyable. While you're on the website, be sure to peruse the library of blogs and podcasts. And finally, if you're interested, reach out to me to schedule a presentation for your group in person or online. I think there's value in helping older adults feel inspired about their future. Well, Jim, thanks so much for being a guest on my program. Uh, your website is jamesbflaherty.com. That's it. And, um, early happy birthday to you.

You got a birthday coming up, so yeah, I won't celebrate it, but it's okay. It's all right, it's all right.

I say I send you some positive birthday wishes. Okay, good. Thank you, Joe.

It's been a great, great pleasure to be with you and your listeners.

Yeah. Thanks very much. And thanks to everyone for tuning in today. Hope to see you next time. Yes, sir. Adiós.

It's time to rethink, renew, and reimagine retirement. Hey everybody, Jared Sylvester here, host of Retire Repurposed. Now, this podcast is about the non-financial parts of retirement, which many times can be even more challenging than the financial. We believe retirement is not the end, rather the beginning of what could be the most impactful, purposeful, and fulfilling season of a person's life. So don't retire, become repurposed. To listen now, search Retire Repurposed on your favorite podcast platform, Senior Resource, or Life Audio.