"I Did Not Give You This Dream Just to Trick You."

19 Jun 2026 · 1 min

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In this emotionally charged monologue, the speaker recounts a recent personal crisis that left them in tears after putting their children to bed. A financial or situational “misstep” forced them to swallow their pride and ask their father for help, moving into a small single‑wide trailer. Confronted with the feeling that God had abandoned them, the speaker wrestles with doubt before reaffirming that the dream they were pursuing was not a deception. Through this struggle they discover a deeper trust in God’s goodness and, simultaneously, a newfound competence as a designer of sustainable systems. They describe applying permaculture principles to repair a broken water system, raising hidden pigs and chickens, and producing roughly half of their own food for an entire year. A brief foreign‑language segment concludes the excerpt. The narrative blends raw vulnerability, spiritual reflection, and practical self‑sufficiency lessons.

Chapters

I remember putting my kids to bed and just crying. I don't know what I've done. I made a huge misstep. God, why would you invite us into this lifestyle and then just completely pull the rug out from underneath us and just not know where to go? I had to approach my father. They had this small single-wide trailer, and I had to, in shame, walk to them and say, "We need help." I don't know what to do. This is why I can confidently tell you, God did not give you this dream just to trick you. I learned how to trust that God is for me and he's good, and I learned how to become a good designer. I had turned a lot of this space, even back here, because of permaculture, knowing how to put in systems. I fixed this water issue that fell down. I had— Pigs and chickens, people didn't even know they were back there. We grew 50% of our own food for a whole year. [FOREIGN LANGUAGE]