48. These 3 Actions Eliminate Fear

Foreign. Hey my friend, welcome back to leadership in a nutshell where we're cracking the code of the driven mind that you and I have been blessed with. This is episode 48. These three actions eliminate fear. So let's jump in and let's think about this. As your host here today, I want to make sure that I really just expose some light on just how massive this fear thing is and what it can mean for us. Like, you know, as, as driven leaders. Many of us are driven entrepreneurs, driven thought leaders, driven managers. Whatever capacity you're coming to the game, I'm pretty sure that you're a driven minded human being or you wouldn't be spending this time together here. And if you are enjoying what you're doing here with us, please give me a like, make sure you're subscribed and I would be honored if you gave me a review as well. However, as we jump in here, let me just ask you this. Who has fear? Who and what has fear? Just let that land for a minute and answer that in your mind. Or if you're in your car, just speak out loud. Say, ganny, here's who has fear. Here's what has fear. Here's where fear shows up. Today I want to give you three actions to help eliminate that fear. And I want you also to realize that if you have fear at times, that is okay. Not only is that okay, my friend, that is 100% natural. It's a necessary part of life. And yet last week I talked about allowing and empowering the struggle or allowing and embracing, I should say the empowering struggle. But I want you to realize that fear's a component. Fear is an ingredient in the recipe of your success. As long as we manage it and then eliminate it when it's not serving us, when we've learned what we can, when it no longer serves a purpose. So what's your answer? Who has fear? Well, if you think about, you know, let's go into the ocean for a moment. Who has fear in the ocean? Every single from the smallest swimming amoeba, if you will. I'm not super book smart and educated, so not sure if amoebas swim or not, but the smallest fish, all the way up to probably the great white, whatever the biggest predator in the ocean might be, everything in between in that food chain has fear at times, has certain things built into its psyche, built into its Persona, built into its physicality, all these different things to try to stay alive and survive and thrive in the environment that it has. Let's go on land if we go to the jungle, everything in the jungle has different levels of fear. There's different predators, different things. When I was in Costa Rica, we were looking at sloths and you go, oh, what a cute little sloth. And they move so slow and they're just sitting there and doing their thing. But they better watch out for sea eagles and the, you know, different massive hawks that'll come down and snatch them out of the tree. Or if a baby falls and the mama can't find it, it's going to, you know, everything in the jungle has fear at different times until maybe you make it all the way up the food chain and then guess what? That has fear that it's going to have enough and make sure that it survives. Different things. Go to the desert. I live in Scottsdale, out here in the desert, same thing. So if you think about, you know, the animal kingdom, if you will, there's different levels of fear at different times. Now, what about us as driven, minded leaders? What about us as humans? If you think about who has fear around you in your life, how about you, how about your team, how about your suppliers? How about if you go get a loan, you have fear that you're going to be approved for the loan, Perhaps your banker has fear if they approve you for the loan, that they're going to get paid. Right? You think about, well, I'm, I'm afraid my taxes are going to go up. So you have fear around politics or whatever. The politicians have fear that they're going to get the support necessary and get reelected and get their bills passed and different. And, you know, it really hit me recently when I was coaching a client on how to perform an interview and certain questions to ask, certain ways to smoke out reality when you, by law, you can't ask certain things. So we, we get people to tell us certain things in ways that we want to have the information that we want and whatnot. And I was thinking about that because I was also talking to somebody who was recently looking for a new job and was going through the interview process and that person had fear of being interviewed and what they were going to do, look, say how they were going to show up in the interview. And yet I'm coaching the leader on giving an interview or hosting an interview, if you will. And then they're. And I'm like, literally, I was like, to the lovely Christie, I'm like, everybody's running around scared all the time. And you go, oh, well, yeah, but you're, you're an owner of a business, Kenny you, you're the CEO of Blue Collar. And so, so you don't have any fear or what about vulnerability? Well, I could have fear that, that my president and my ops director, my, my top key leaders, my top trainers, my top coaches, I could have fear that they're going to leave, right? And I could go, well, man, I, what if I lose my team? Some of you may, might have that around top salespeople, top managers, different things. And then you go to your top managers and your top leaders and go back to what they're thinking from their perspective. Well, yeah, but what if you sell the business as the top leader? What it they might be afraid that you're going to make a deal without them or what? So at the end of the day it's like, holy cow, we're all running around scared. Let's eliminate some of this. That's what I'm here to do today. Let's think through this. Let's talk through this. Because there's two things that are really driving us at all times and they coexist. There's certainty and uncertainty are coexisting all the time. And as we move forward, as we think through things, as we look at clarity and we try to get different things, there's all different types of I'm certain about something and then the next thing you know, the world hands me uncertainty. If I'm not sure about something, then certainly before long I'm going to have certainty about it. There's a whole lot of certains going on right there. Right? Here's the three keys that will help you eliminate fear. Clarity, transparency. And couple those with consistency. And really good things are going to take place. And I want you to think globally around this topic today. And I want you to really embrace this whole eliminating fear and using these three actions, I'm going to dive into each one a little bit deeper in a moment. But think about this in your own personal life. Now, obviously, I believe in life, I don't believe that you have personal, professional, separated. But for the ease of our newer listeners and as just kind of categorically looking at maybe time blocks, think about this in your personal life or where does your fear show up and how can these three actions serve you? What about in your professional life with your team, with your leaders, with the people that you might report to? And then what about in your family life, with your intimate relationship with your children, with siblings, however that might manifest and show itself. And so clarity, transparency, consistency, we begin with clarity. All things begin with clarity. The first dimension is in the six dimensions of change 2.0. If you haven't read it, grab it on audible. Super inexpensive, easy. Listen. I'm honored with the feedback and everybody's comments. I'm getting first dimension in six dimensions of change 2.0 is clarity. And so here when we think about clarity in the fear elimination, really a lot of fear comes from. I'm not really clear about what I want or what I don't want. So see, I can eliminate fear when I step up and go, I know exactly who I am and what I want. I know exactly when I'm speaking truth and when I might be kind of going off track a little bit with what I really desire and what I want to honor in my own world of desire. Right? When we think about who you really are, what do you really want as a leader? Why did you become a leader? And. And are you executing the things that drove you to become that leader? What do you really want from your life, your business, from your team members? Are you executing clarity with them and do they know? So first clarity begins with us, and then it goes from the communication of them really beginning to understand. But if I'm going to use the three actions to eliminate fear, first is clarity of who you are, what you want, and speaking the truth. Now, clarity is not enough. Where we get into the communication is the second thing transparency. So I've got to be transparency. And I work to live my life with a no BS rule, no apologies. Like, what I want is what I want and I want what I want because that's what I want. And that, you know, frustrates some people and some people can't resonate with that. That's okay. I'm not asking them to change who they are. I'm just honoring my truth that I don't know why I want certain things in my life. Sometimes it's just because it makes me feel good. Sometimes it's just because I want it. And that's okay. As long as I'm being a productive citizen of society, as long as I'm creating incredible jobs, as long as I'm creating amazing, loving relationships, as long as I'm making the world a better place, as long as I'm living my primary purpose and improving the lives of others while I'm learning and growing and becoming all that I can every single day on this planet, then I don't need to apologize for wanting what I want. And so being transparent with others, living kind of by a no BS rule, you know, I'm not big on the corporate, you know, boardroom communication. It's not that I'm not a fan of corporations. I love big corporations. We, we work with massive companies all the time. We're scaling blue collar very quickly and we're adding incredible talent all the time and growing our team and we're becoming a bigger business. I'm not trying to be a small business. I'm trying to be an effective business. And effective communication comes from transparency. And effective communication that comes from transparency equals effective leadership, which turns into effective business. So if I want to eliminate fear, I've got to have clarity and then I've got to be transparent about what I want. Like, hey, I want you to, you know, if I'm talking about a sales process, I want you to ask these certain questions. I want you to carry yourself in this way. I want you to have this level of confidence. And here's why. Here's the transparency of what I'm asking you to do. If I have a direct report, then I'm asking them to lead in a certain specific way. If they're on my leadership team. If they're, if they're, you know, maybe you're a mid level management. I hate those words and terms, but whatever, you know, you understand what I'm saying? Like frontline leader, then, you know, how are you trying to get your team to do the tactical work that you want? You got to be transparent about why you want what you want. Because if you're trying to play a game and keep cards in your pocket, they nobody's going to win. Clarity first, then transparency. And couple both of those with the third thing, consistency. And the world responds to consistency, period. Whether it's good, whether it's bad, whether it's positive, whether it's negative, whatever that is. People crave consistency. We've all heard like, oh, maybe you've had leaders that, man, you just never know what you're going to get, never know what's going to take place. I know back in my drinking days, depending on how I felt might be the type of Kenny that you got, whatever that might look like now as I become a master of emotional regulation, there's a lot more consistency with my team, with my leaders. I worked hard. Is what you see is what you get. I live as an open book. My front stage and backstage are very, very close together. What I'm sharing with you all on the recording now and what I live behind the scenes are, are in, in congruent. I mean incongruency, not incongruent. They, they are Congruent. How about that? You know, and, and so when you think about, you know, it's like, I like the analogy of basketball coaches of Phil Jackson and Bobby Knight. Phil Jackson, super zen, like super chill, but consistent with it. You knew what it was like. If he was throwing chairs across the gymnasium and cursing and slapping people, you'd be like, whoa, what's going on? However, if Bobby Knight's not cursing and throwing chairs and slapping people, you're going to be like, whoa, what's going on? Because Bobby Knight was consistently in your face, yelling, cursing, screaming, calling names, whatever that is. They were both consistent in their style. Therefore, team responded. The same is true for you. The same is true for your leadership. Now I know which one of those I would prefer to choose if you. And actually the ultimate one is, I choose the Kenny Chapman way. But when we realize everybody's running around scared and there's a lot of fear that drives the world and the uncertainty and certainty and all these different things as you work hard to eliminate fear, getting clarity and sharing it with, being transparent about who you are, what you want and why you want to go where you want to go, and then being consistent with how you are, you know, no Jekyll and Hyde approach here. You know, I, I, I was always fascinated by the little Jekyll and Hyde fable in the story. And then when I went to Edinburgh the first time in Scotland, I was blown away that there was actually that story kind of based on an 18th century cabinet maker by the name of Deacon Brody. And this guy was super well respected business person during the day, which actually gave him the ability to have keys to many of the affluent and the rich people's homes throughout the community so he could go in and do his work and different stuff. So here's Deacon Brody this upfront, you know, amazing, great citizen during the day and at night he would go and rob people's homes and sneak in because he had the keys and all, you know, and what we want is to not be a Deacon Brody ultimately was caught and tried and hung as the story anyway, or hanged. I'm not sure exactly how you say that, but, you know, it didn't end well for Deacon. How about that, right? But when we look at consistency, it's about authenticity and stepping into who you are. And, you know, next week I'm going to talk about authenticity with attention, and I'm excited for you to join me next week for that. But I want you to just honor your truth and when you get clear about who you are and you do the work on your purpose and why you're doing what you're doing, and then you're transparent with your team. You know, like, I believe I can do anything on the planet. I just don't feel that I need to do it. I believe I can surround myself with incredible team and their own unique ability. That's one of my unique abilities, is attracting quality team and setting them free. And that's what I do when I say I don't have to do anything. I have to continue to build amazing relationships, continue to foster incredible relationships, continue to realize and smoke out unique ability in people and set them free. Continue, continue to do the same with myself. And as I'm transparent about that and I don't apologize for the life that I want and why I want it, and then I'm consistent with those things, people are less afraid. And when people are less afraid, they do incredible things. Your team will do the same, your family will do the same. Your marriage will show up in a new way. Think about that just on the marriage before I let you go. If you're super clear about what you want in your relationship and, and then you're transparent and you're not hiding and like, well, I might be embarrassed to say that I want this. I don't know if it's going to be politically correct if I tell you this is why I want this certain thing in our relationship. But then your consistency, honoring your truth, that's incredible. As the lovely Christy and I have applied more and more of this in our relationship, our incredible relationship just continues to get more and more incredible. Not that there's never in a struggle. Remember last week we talked about allowing the empowering struggle and learning from it. Two weeks ago we talked about how to maximize a learning experience. That's what it's about. You got this, my friend. I'm Kenny Chapman, your host of episode number 48 of Leadership. In a nutshell, these three actions eliminate fear. Give us a, like, give us a review. Please, please, please. Don't make me beg. But I'm begging. Jot a couple things in the comments as a review and make sure you're subscribed until we talk. Make it a better than fantastic week. And you see, we'll, and we'll see you real soon. Thanks, everybody.