Top Tips: Introverts have a lot to offer in negotiations - Highlight Reel

Hello my friends, and welcome to another exciting episode of Negotiate Anything. This show is produced by the American Negotiation Institute and with over 5 million downloads and listeners in over 180 countries, listeners just like you have made this the number one negotiation podcast in the world. Hi, my name is Kwame Christian and I am the founder and CEO of the American Negotiation Institute. Here at AI, we believe that the best things in life are on the other side of difficult conversations, and we are passionate about providing you with the best content that will help you to make your difficult conversations easier, both at work and at home. Lastly, I want to remind you that we offer consulting and conduct trainings both virtually and in person all around the world. Our focus is in three main areas. First, negotiation and conflict resolution. Second, leadership and lastly, diversity, equity and inclusion. Check the link in the description below to learn more about how we could work with you and your team. And now, without further ado, let's jump into the interview. So the million dollar question what is an introvert?

Yes. First, can I answer with what it's not? Yeah, I like that because we often have a faulty definition of it. It is not shy, it is not antisocial, it's not someone who doesn't like people like a misanthrope. Those tend to be the stereotypes that we have fallen into and still even increase in information and conversation that we have today. I still see those words coming up in reference to introverts. So that's what it's not. What it is I like to talk about it is an energetic trait. So lots of times we talk about it as a personality trait, like that person is quiet or hangs out on the edges, or we talk about it in terms of how that person shows up socially. If you go back to the original definition genesis of introvert and extrovert from Carl Jung back in the 1920s, it has to do with where you gain and drain your energy. So an introvert will gain energy through solitude and lower stimulation environments and drain energy during higher stimulation situations and social interaction. So notice I say it's not that we don't like those things. It's not that we're not good at them. It's not about our social skills. It's simply that it takes a lot of energy for us to be in those situations. And in order for us to be in those situations and to be healthy and happy and contributing, we need our solitude and we need our downtime. And we need that basically kind of to hit the mute button on life for a little while so that we can show up socially. And extroverts, while I don't like to talk of them as opposites, do fall on that sort of other end of the spectrum where they gain energy through social interaction and stimulation. And they drain energy if they have too much solitude and alone time or not enough stimulation coming their way. And what's important to recognize is that we all fall on a spectrum. So no one is 100% introvert, 100% extrovert. Some people might come close, but, you know, it's. We all have both energies within us. And so, like, I think of myself as maybe 75% introvert, 25% extrovert. And that extrovert piece is what enables me to kind of show up, do interviews like this, get up and do public speaking, and basically kind of project my energy out into the world. So in order to do that, I need that 75% of my time basically to be able to introvert, to turn inward, to recharge my batteries. So that's why I think of it as an energetic trait, kind of taking it away from that realm of talking about it in terms of your personality. And whether you're bubbly and friendly and social or you're quiet and reclusive, those are outward manifestations that may or may not be true for somebody. You can have an outgoing, gregarious introvert, but that person absolutely requires the solitude in order to be that outgoing and gregarious person.

Right. Matthew, I think a good place for us to start is your unique definition of introversion. So tell us about what it is and then also what a lot of the misconceptions are that end up confusing people.

Yeah, absolutely. And I. You know, it's really interesting when you talk about introversion. Firstly, a lot of people still don't know what introversion and extroversion is, which is crazy because realistically, we need to understand ourselves as people. If we don't understand ourselves as people, we don't know what skill sets that we have naturally. We don't know what skills gaps we have that we need to look for training and coaching to help get beyond. For instance, some might say that extroverts aren't the best listeners in the world. And introverts have that in spades. Introverts, of course, have their own barriers. And that's really the way I look at introversion and extroversion. We all have our burdens to bear. The truth is we just have skills gaps that we have to learn how to compensate for. And actually some of those skills gaps give us Amazing advantages with the extra skill sets that we have learned over a lifetime. So when I look at introversion and extroversion, I think psychologists have, they've made a lot of money making it very confusing. So I try to simplify it to something really, really easy for everybody to just go, oh, I'm introverted, I'm extroverted. Which is where you draw your energy from. For instance, I founded a festival in Austin, Texas. It's grown to be the number three conference in America for small business. And I remember when we did our first big conference and the last day. One of the speakers was Jim Cathcart. He's a great personal friend of mine. He's one of the most award winning speakers in the world. And he and I were both involved in the event the entire three day period. He had a wonderful time, I had a wonderful time. The difference was on day three, he wanted to go down rainy street in Austin and experience the live music capital the world. Because he was jazzed, he was buzzing, he was so energized because he was around people. I wanted to put on a hoodie, go home and watch Netflix. I didn't want to have anything to do with hanging out with people at that point. Now I remember that he was my guest, so I had to take him out that night. And I have never had to. I mean, the guy is 70. I've never had to ask a 70 year old before in my life, can I please go home now? I was exhausted. So the difference is just this. If you draw your energy from being around people, you're an extrovert. If you draw your energy from being by yourself, you're an introvert. Now that doesn't mean that because you're an introvert, you don't like people, you don't like networking, you don't like sales. Now I've had people that have said to me, matt, I do not want to learn sales. I want you to teach me the marketing stuff so I don't have to sell. And then I've said, well, let's just do a little bit of sales. Let me train you just so we can validate that the words that you're using work so we can build it onto a website so you never have to speak to someone again. And those people have grown to love sales and now they don't want to give it up. So the key is that usually an introvert is terrible at a lot of these extroverted arenas, or so called extroverted arenas, because we don't have a system and process to follow. That in truth, once we have allows us to leverage our natural skills to beat out the extroverts hands down. Now that's not to say that the extroverts can't learn these skill sets and strategies, but the truth is extroverts are tend to like to wing things. They have to take a big back step to then catapult forward and they're less likely to do it. With introverts, we're kind of terrible at sales, networking, negotiation. So without those strategies, we're not going to do well. So of course we're willing to do the legwork up front so that we can excel. And you know, I mean, a system will always outperform a winged process every day of the week and twice on Sunday eventually. And actually not, it doesn't take that long. Now, the misconceptions are pretty simple. A lot of people say things like, oh, I used to be introverted, but don't worry, I'm extroverted now. Like, introversion is a bad thing. It's not a curse, it's an advantage. In my world, it gives you an edge because you're more prone to learning a system. And you've got these amazing advantages of active listening and empathy that take time for extroverts to learn and actually require a lot of coaching to learn and do and achieve. Well, now other people, people will say things like, oh, you know, I used to be really extroverted, but since COVID I'm now more introverted. No, that's just a behavior or a habit that used to have a habit of going out a lot. Now you like watching Netflix. But the truth is, if you go out and you're actually motivated and energized because you went out, you're an extrovert. It doesn't change who you are just because you don't want to do it as often anymore. You'll find as long as you're drawing your energy from being with people or drawing your energy from being by yourself, that's the simplest way to really decide who you are.

One thing that I realized as you were talking, I see a lot of books focused on how introverts can really unlock their potential, lead, persuade, manage effectively those type of things. And there seems to be a robust community of leaders in the space that are focused on introverts. But what's interesting is I don't see the same type of support or focus on extroverts. And it was like it perked my attention because you said, I'M helping people to understand how they can succeed in an introverted. Sorry. In an extroverted world. So when you think about us living in an extroverted world, what does that mean to you?

Let me start by telling a little story. I've just come from France from Maxwell Leadership Conference, a John Maxwell certified coach. Basically, I asked the question as one of the ambassadors we had to help people off stage. And while we were helping people. People off stage, you. There were men on my side and they would stretch out their hands to help the ladies get down from the stairs, but then put their hand back when a man was coming down the stairs. So I said to my colleague, the ambassador, I said, why aren't you helping the men? It's a dangerous step. Whoever the person is that is coming. Right was like, well, I don't have an answer to that. But later on I said to him, really, I want to know who said that it was not okay to help a man and stretch out your hand for a man. Because I was ready to help everybody. But it felt odd stretching out my hand for a man because they would look at me and go, what exactly are you doing? You know? So what I'm trying to say here is you've heard the song that says it's a man's world and majority rules. So it's the same thing. When it comes to introversion, extrovers Something like 55% of the population is extroverted. I mean, 45% introverted. So you find that people create things like open office. Open Office works brilliantly for extroverts who don't mind external stimulus coming at them like a hoax. But for the introvert, that's one of our worst nightmares. You can't control the light, you can control the sound. It's all open. You can control the people around you. So your thinking can get impacted by having an open plan office. But that is the norm. That's what safe cost, that's what the first thing people think. It's all about interacting. Nobody thinks of the other side. So that's why I'm saying it's an extroverted world. If you're an introvert in that space, you've got to manage your energy, you've got to manage your thinking capabilities so that you can cope and survive in that environment.

I love this answer for two main reasons. The first reason is we need to helping men off stage. Because as a public speaker, that is one of my biggest fears. I'm like, why are these stairs so small and so Steep. If I fall every time. Patience. Every time I'm walking up the stairs and walking down, I'm like, this is the time I'm going to fall this time. So I like, I like that aspect of it. But on the other side, I think it's. The reason why I asked this question is because I think that people don't realize what kind of world we live in. There was a really famous public speaker who was doing a commencement speech, a graduation speech, and he said there were these fish swimming in the ocean. And one fish goes up to another fish and says, how's the water? And the other fish says, what is water? Right. It's. It's so ubiquitous around the fish that it doesn't even acknowledge its existence. And when you think about the, the, the world that we live in, it's designed in many ways by extroverts, for extroverts, and we don't take the time to question it. And so for the listeners of the podcast, I think it's important if you, as an introvert, somebody who's more introverted, it's important to recognize that you're not abnormal or there's not something wrong with you. And a lot of times the resistance that you feel is because the world was designed for extroverts versus introverts. And so we need to develop strategies around that. And then on the other side, if you identify as an extrovert and you don't recognize that this world was designed for your benefit, it helps you to empathize at a higher level with our introverted colleagues. So I think that's a really important place for us to start.

Yes, I think so. I think it's. It's not, it's not trying to say introverts are weak. It's not trying to say extroverts are strong. It's not trying to say any of those things. It's just recognizing this is how the world is. And if you really want to thrive, recognizing the differences, appreciating them, and doing what you can to either be the change or adapt something, then you are able to thrive.

Absolutely. Absolutely. What are some things that introverts could do, using our special introvert powers to become more persuasive?

Yeah. You know, introverts have some strengths that I think go hand in hand with persuasion. And there are two in particular. One is that we tend to be, and I'm always going to use that sort of tend to be because. Because it's not universally true. But this is what kind of studies and Anecdotes have shown, we tend to be really strong listeners and we tend to instinctively want to put the spotlight on others. And I think those two things, when it comes to having a persuasive conversation or even a crucial conversation, are really part of the key to connecting with another person and to finding that space where you can both walk away feeling good about the interaction. In my mind, persuasion. And I'm not sure I'd be curious for you to define persuasion, because as I thought about it, I thought, to me, it's not about proving that you're right or that your idea is the best. To me, it's not about, like, convincing to the point of manipulating. It's about finding that common ground that's good for both people. And in the process, being able to honor, you know, like a win for you is being honored to what's most important to you and the other person. And I think being able, you know, those introvert superpowers of being able to really see and hear and listen to someone else and to be able to put their needs also out on the table, not just always thinking of your own, are two things that they bring to those kinds of conversations that can help them be more persuasive.

Absolutely. And those are key because you need to be able to be a great listener. And in order to persuade effectively, you need to have a solid understanding of what issues and interests exist within the other party. So those are key skills. And to your point, with regard to my definition of persuasion, it would be the act of getting someone to do something that they otherwise would not have done had you not had the conversation. You're absolutely right. It's not about being right or getting people to convincing them of your rightness. A lot of times you have a choice. You could either be right or you can be persuasive. And that's often what makes this process so difficult. So, yeah, I think that gives introverts a little bit of an edge when it comes to these conversations. One of the things that you talk about is courageous leadership, which I really, really like. And the reason I like the word courage versus fearless is because courage acknowledges that you have a fear and then you overcome it. Fearlessness is a pathology. You should be afraid of some things. There's a reason evolutionarily why we have fear. It keeps us alive. I don't want to be fearless. I want to have that fear so I can still understand and analyze the situation effectively. And most of the time when you think you can't just tell somebody to Be fearless. Oh, sweet. Okay, I'll turn off my amygdala. Thanks for that advice. Right. But being courageous is more realistic. And so when you think about courageous leadership, what would you say are the keys?

For me, courageous leadership has basically six foundations that I recognize. The first and foremost, you're right about the word fearless versus the word courage. Many of us can be fearless in situations where we have had an experience before. Over time, you don't exhibit any fear because you've done it over time. You've seen people do it, they're safe. But then in situations where you've never tried something before or you know that deep down within you, you don't have the strength to meet up with the challenge that is in front of you, you shouldn't then take a step back and go, I'm not going to do it. So courage allows you to move forward. So in my view, there are six foundations to look at when it comes to courageous leadership. And the first one is basically effectively, self regulation. You regulate yourself. The other is you cast a vision for where you want to go, whether or not that looks possible in your current reality. And then you plan a strategy. How do I get to that space? And you decide that you're not going to go alone. It takes courage to go, I don't think. I think it takes pride to go alone. It takes courage to go with others, because the truth about it is managing people, directing people is not easy. It's easier to say, I have all the control because everything here is me doing it myself. But leadership is actually about directing people. So that's. The number four is learning to direct others. The number five is equip and empower others, not just direct them. So it's one thing to say, come along with me. It's another thing to say, I leave you to do all these things on your own, and that will empower you. And the last one is you build teams around you to help you accomplish more. Whether you are there or not, you're able to accomplish more because you have people around you. So for me, I think that these are the key factors that are needed for a courageous leader to be able to lead effectively.

What are some possible downfalls of being an introvert?

Oh, in some cases, it might be you listen too much, like you're not perhaps asserting yourself into the conversation like we can, if we're not careful, let someone else kind of take over because we're not comfortable with interrupting, or we're not comfortable because interruptions are interesting. And I'd Be curious about your take on them when it comes to persuasion and negotiation. But again, generally, extroverts tend to see interruptions as excitement. Like, you're engaged, you're with me, you're in the conversation. And they almost. Again, not always. And a lot of it depends on sort of power dynamics and all of that. But typically, if you don't interrupt them and you don't get to say what you want to say, they're going to say, well, why didn't you interrupt me? You should have stopped me. You should have just jumped in. So as introverts, though, we almost have the opposite response to interruptions. We tend to think of them as rude. It's kind of like, hey, I finally am getting to talk. Don't jump on top of me. Don't interrupt me. Let me say my piece. Again, it depends on the situation, the context. It might be okay, depending. But generally speaking, introverts are less comfortable with interrupting and being interrupted when it comes to persuasion or negotiation. You know, for introverts, that might be something to pay attention to. Like, if you feel like you're not getting your voice heard or you feel like you are being kind of talked into submission, it's important to sharpen that skill of being able to politely and tactfully cut your way in. And it might be saying something like, you know, can we just take a pause here for a second? Or I need to back up for a moment. Or would you mind if we stop for a second? I want to think about what you just said. Or I have a question. I use body cues. You know, assuming you're in person, I raise my hand, you know, real quick. Or, you know, you try to use your body language to say, I need to get in here. And so that might sound like a small thing, but I think that it's actually a big thing. Because if we don't develop that particular skill when we're having these kinds of conversations, we can get railroaded, or we can, you know, get to that point where we're not getting to say what was really important, and then we leave the conversation either not getting what we came for or feeling like we weren't heard. And I would hope that in a successful and in a productive persuasion conversation that everyone feels heard, you might not always get what you want, but at least you got to say your piece. You feel seen and heard. And I think being able to have that dance of interrupting and not interrupting is very important.

And now when we think about introverted leaders, what is different for them when it Comes to how they experience leadership, being in that role and then when it comes to how they lead.

Yeah.

So one of the things that I know a lot of introverts, working with introverts, being an introvert myself in the corporate world as well as in the business world, is when people talk about, oh, this person is quite. So they are not going to be able to talk to people and tell people what to do. That's because many times people think leadership is about telling people what to do. And the truth is that's not what leadership. Leadership, like I said, if you equip people and you then trust them to do things, they are able to take responsibility without you telling them what to do, they get on with it. So in terms of introverts, many introverts have said, I'm too quiet, I'm not direct enough, I don't talk to people forcefully. So how do I get people to do things? So it's to understand this other element of you don't have to push people before they do things. And it's to find the courage to actually say, I want to serve. Because some people don't recognize two things about leadership is service and sacrifice. And I know a lot of introverts are also empaths, you know, and they very observant, very, you know, the quietness is all about taking in what's happening around you and understanding was. Whereas the extrovert is very quick to just jump to that next thing. The introvert is probably taking the time to look at what's happening here, why is it happening? And that makes the introvert a very, very important part of your team. Because the teams that you, the things that you miss, they will see and they can take the lead from a place of service. I will serve in giving you insights that you don't have. If you need to get some clarity, go to patience. She's the leader there. So when you see, if you, when I introduced myself, I talked about leveraging your strengths, you step up and say, these are my strengths and I want to leverage them here because I can see the gap in this team. So that is how I'm going to provide leadership, by leveraging my strengths of intuition, of deep thinking, of deep connection that will then help me build a team, things like that. So I believe that introverts, I used to struggle at work in the corporate world because they said, oh, you don't talk much, you don't. But I'm listening in the meetings and whatever I hear sometimes when I come up with my own Observation. It's like, oh, oh, we didn't think about that. And I'm like, I know you wouldn't, because everybody's. So that's. That's the key thing is to recognize that you can step up and see a gap and decide to step up to lead, to direct, to provide some kind of support that will make a difference.

I love this. And really what it. What it's sounding like to me and patience, you tell me if I'm. If I'm off on this. It's sounding like one of the keys to leading as an introvert is to acknowledge and recognize your unique strengths because you have unique values that you bring to the conversation. You have a unique skill set, a unique perspective, and you think differently. And once you recognize that this is something that you bring to the table that a lot of other people don't, it helps you to find that courage to say and do what needs to be said and done.

Yeah. And also, I think anybody who is saying, I want to promote somebody needs to have the courage to also promote an introvert that they think this person is quiet. How would they get the work done? Because many times it's the loud person that is able to sell themselves, that is able to put themselves out there, that is recognized as, oh, yes, they can take charge, they can take authority, they can do it. And it's so hard sometimes for the introvert to then come up with, I can do it too, you know, but I would do it differently. So it's finding that courage to, like you rightfully said, understand what strengths you bring, understand how that strength translates into results, and put yourself forward talking about those results because you recognize that they are needed and there's a gap there, and you put yourself forward and deliver. I can provide one example. Everywhere I went, I introduced an induction process. I have sensitivity to people starting out without support, throw them in the deep end and sink or swim. So I always set up an induction process. Now, looking back then, I didn't think about it as, oh, this is. But I took my own journey and my own struggle when I started. And I introduced an induction process that included mentoring, shadowing, and reviews that would help people who are starting out to really settle in better and stronger. Not just faster, but stronger. So that ultimately what you want them to do is to be independent members of the team that can contribute more effectively because they have been inducted properly. And so that's somewhere that initially I used to think that's just something I wanted to do to support, but that, to me, is an area of leadership, an area where I took charge and provided support recognizing the gap within the business.

And then I love the fact that you talk about the value of strategy, the value of a process. There's one thing that all great strategists have in common. A strategy. That's it. And winging it isn't a strategy. Right. And I like the fact that you said a process or a strategy is better than nothing, because then it puts people in a position where they can replicate what it is that you did because you learned, then you immediately applied, and then you started honing your skills. Okay, this works. This doesn't work. I'm going to do it incrementally better every single time. So you're essentially running a lifelong experiment. And that's really what life can and should be if we're willing to put our hypotheses into action. And that's what a lot of people don't do. Because really, a lot of times procrastination is just an intellectualized form of fear. It's we are afraid, and then we just hold back. But we convince ourselves, oh, you know, I'm just a thoughtful person. I like to think things through. And then we think ourselves out of doing what needs to be done. So I love the fact that you're not only focused on learning, but also being experimental and taking action. Because a lot of times people don't take what they learn and put it into action. So I think all of this is really great.

One thing I will say to that is that I just talked about sales, networking. You just talked about negotiation. The truth is that if you say, I'm going to learn all of those things, that's also busy procrastination. Because then it will become overwhelming and you won't do any of them. So pick one frontier. Like, there's one thing that I'm working on right now. There always is one thing I'm working on right now that I plan on going from conscious incompetence because I'm terrible at it and I know it. And moving myself to conscious competence to eventually it'll be unconscious competence. I just know exactly how to do it, and it's natural. And then everyone will say, you're so lucky. You just were born with that natural ability. No, I worked hard for that. Right? So the thing is that you need to be fixated on one thing. And that could be just becoming a better parent. Right? Getting more involved in your child's social life or whatever it takes. Pick one thing. Read the books on it, read a book on it and find. Focus on a system and process. Listen to a bunch of podcast interviews, pick one authority on the topic and go. I'm going to go deep into that person's book and learn their system before I get creative and piece anything else together. Then turn it into a masterful level and you will succeed. Now, the truth is that, I mean this isn't new stuff. Like Brian Tracy, who is extroverted by the way, says the top 10% of all sales performers have a planned presentation. Now, if want you, if you think about that, I mean the bottom 80%, he says, just say it says whatever comes out of their mouth. Which of course extroverts are better at and why the introverts are at the bottom, but in the top 10%. Funnily enough, I spoke at the AAISP, which is the American association of Inside Sales Professionals. And if you think they're of all the big brand names that you can recognize, the head of all their sales departments were at this corporate retreat and I did a survey beforehand. Guess What? More than 50% of the people, people in that room were introverted. The best in the business are introverted. You go to the top 30 sales gurus list of which I'm on by globalgurus.org you'll find that half of that list is more introverted than extroverted. It's common knowledge to the people that know that introversion is an advantage. The problem is the world knows that extroversion is an advantage, and that's the problem. If you think about the world of Netflix networking, you think about the skill sets that people don't like. Self promotion, obscene confidence, right? These are commonly seen as extroverted skill sets. Now truthfully, there are skills that extroverts can learn to not come across that way, but it's not a natural thing for them. On the other side, the things that introverts, sorry, the things that people like in networking tend to be more commonly introverted strategies. But without a process to actually start a dialogue, you have a problem. The same thing when you think about speakers. If you ask me to go and deliver a topic, there's two things you're going to know. One is it's going to be pretty close to exactly what you experienced last time. So you knew it was good last time, you know it's going to be good this time. And secondly, I'm going to research your organization to the hilt to make sure that the things that are different are uniquely customized to your organization with a huge amount of knowledge behind it. Because I have made sure that anything I say from stage, I don't feel self conscious about, I don't feel like an imposter about. I need to have done my homework. A lot of times when you say to an extroverted speaker, hey, I loved what you did there, can you go and deliver it for our other department? They'll say, well, I don't even know what I said. I might be able to stay slightly in the same framework as what I know, but maybe it's going to be probably 20, 30% different. With me it's probably going to be 10% different, maybe 5, but every part of that is going to be planned. Now if you think about that kind of framing and the advantage that gives you, it's huge. Now going back to storytelling, because introverts, there's a huge power in storytelling. For instance, that story of my personal life, I've got a story of Wendy that I tell. I say on introvert, you, I have program called, you know, you're one story away. And I talk about the fact that every business is one story away from, you know, a, you know, rapid growth business that revolves around then their family and their life. Because I believe if you have one story and it's not your story, it's a story of a customer you worked with that had a problem that you got to an amazing result. If you can share that story in a way that you don't currently tell it, trust me, because everyone says these really boring business stories, customer wanted this, so we gave it to them. There's no emotional roller coaster. I'm talking more like the story of how you met your, your husband or wife, your life partner. Right. If you can tell a story that has that emotional fabric to it, there are some amazing things that happens. It short circuits the logical mind, which speaks directly to the emotional mind, which by the way, the logical part of the brain is going, that'll work for me, that won't work for me. I don't have time for this. The emotional brain literally short circuits that when it hears a story, goes story time. And it just listens. Now the power of that is even a host of a podcast might disengage and go, wow, this is an engaging story. And forget that they're a podcast host. Right? So stories are powerful for that. People Remember up to 22 times more information when embedded into a story. And thirdly, this research out of Stanford that says that when I tell a story, what happens is it activates the reticular activating system of our brains which causes our brains to synchronize. It creates natural rapport that an introvert can then leverage into real rapport with those three things combined. Think about the parrot gives you on podcast interviews, speaking from stage selling, negotiation. It's hugely powerful when you tell a story because what happens is you get the. Instead of telling somebody why they're wrong or why they should see it this way, you're actually getting them to live an experience, to see it from somebody else's point of view. And as long as the moral of the story hits, that can be transformational for anyone that is listening. So if you're an introvert especially, you can write these stories out, you can practice them, you can plan them. Not in a scripted way that sounds robotic, like that telemarketer that calls you at 8 o' clock at night that you don't want them calling you because you're trying to have a family dinner. But by the way, you know, your favorite movies, like all of your favorite movies, they're reading from scripts too. They didn't write it out, but they remembered it. They've embraced it. I mean, Leonardo DiCaprio in some of his parts, you know, I think he's fantastic. Another introvert, by the way. But he's read the script, he's embraced the character so that he can deliver it on camera. You remember one story. If you can deliver one story, maybe two really well, that's all you need for your business. But most introverts will just wing it, just like the extroverts. And by the way, nobody should. If you tell one story well, it should be the same story the same way every time. And the only change is how you're applying it to the unique circumstance they highlighted when you were networking, just before they spoke, when you were negotiating. If you can do that, you can be masterful at really a lot of these so called extroverted arenas because story over logic wins every time. So leave your fire hose of jargon at home. Tell a story instead.

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