Examine which role you play at work using Stephen Karpman's drama triangle: victim, rescuer, or persecutor. The speaker offers a fourth option, the hero role, where you take ownership and steer your own destiny instead of getting trapped in workplace dynamics.
Day 20 of the 30/30 Career Transformation Challenge. We are on day 20. I'm so glad you're still with me, um, for the 30/30 Career Transformation Challenge. 30 bold questions over the 30 days of September to help you upend your career, to help you set new goals, ask yourself bold questions, and be willing to do the work to transform your career starting today. Today's bold question: What role are you playing in your career? Each of us plays a pivotal role in our career, but what I'm looking for when I'm asking you about the role you're playing in your career is not the, um, outward look, the, the, um, the presentation, that you have with your career. What I'm looking for is this deeper introspection. Have you ever heard of the drama triangle? Stephen Karpman developed this drama triangle, and he says that we occupy 3 particular roles. We're either a victim, a rescuer, or a persecutor. And I would add that we are either, we could become a hero. In the victim role, you run around thinking that everything that happens to you is because you are a victim. Things are being done to you. Any hiccup in your career is something that's being done to you. If your boss looks at you sideways, he doesn't like you. If you are told to correct something that really needs to be corrected, It's because somebody doesn't like you. You are playing the victim role in your career. You are the victim. Now, let's look at this a little bit further. You could become the rescuer. Let me tell you who rescuers are. You work for a boss who can't get it together even if he tried or she tried. You work for an individual who uses you as a doormat. You are the person's doormat. And every day you get up and you go into work to rescue that person. You've made it your mission rather than figuring out your goals and where you wanna go with your career, you are hellbent on rescuing someone who should be rescuing themselves. You've built your career to rescue your boss and never to allow yourself to shine. You've decided that you'd rather be in the background than in the foreground of your career. You're playing the rescuer role. Then there are those who are in the persecuted role. Everything is being persecuted and perpetuated against you. Your heart and you're clutching your pearls right now. Thinking, what is she talking about? You know what I'm talking about. You're always persecuted and you persecute others because you cycle through being a victim, being a rescuer, and then when you're worn out being the victim and rescuing everyone, you now flip the switch and take it out on everyone else. Or you've just been promoted to a leadership position and you are now the persecutor because all the people who victimized you and rescued you are now under you, and you get to be the persecutor. But there's another option. You could decide to be a hero. Here's a hero. A hero says, "I won't be a victim. I won't rescue, and I won't persecute others." I'm going to play the hero role in my career. I'm going to focus on what I want. I'm going to be a contributing member of the team. I'm going to be a team player even when I don't want to play on the team. I'm going to be a team player even when I think things are unfair. I'm going to play the role of the hero. I'm going to allow myself to shine and I'm going to allow myself to push forward. I'm not going to allow myself to be a victim, a rescuer, or a persecutor. I'm going to be a hero. And when you take on the role of a hero in your career, you now are empowered to look out in the horizon and decide where you're going to go because you recognize very quickly that the career you have is a ladder. It's a step. You're taking a step up the ladder, and as you go up the ladder, different things will come in your way, but those encounters will ultimately make you stronger. They'll prepare you for leadership. They'll test your resilience. They will empower you to push through and become the person you want to become. You, in the hero role, determines your destiny. You don't allow anyone else to control your destiny. So my question for you today, what role are you playing in your career? Are you the victim? Are you a rescuer? Are you a persecutor? Or are you going to be a hero? Thank you for joining me for the 30/30 Challenge. As I've said before, this has been an amazing 20 days. I'm so empowered, and I hope that you are too. Thank you for joining me.
