Most managers avoid tough feedback because they fear employee reactions. Mark Murphy suggests asking your boss: "What's one thing I could do or do differently that would make your life easier?" The phrasing keeps it low-stakes and non-threatening enough to get the honest input they're holding back.
Your boss is probably avoiding giving you feedback. When we asked managers, 81% admitted they've avoided giving tough feedback because they were afraid of how employees would react. So the feedback exists. It's just sitting in your boss's head unsaid. Here's how to get it out. Ask them, what's one thing I could do or do differently that would make your life easier? Every word in that little script is doing a job. You're asking for one thing. So they don't have to assemble a full performance review on the spot. And everybody's boss has one small tweak in their mind. Make your life easier? That phrase is non-threatening. You're not after their job. You just want to be helpful. Now, one warning: if the answer is, you can't, pay attention. Maybe they were stressed that day, so ask again in a few weeks. If you still can't get one small answer, the problem isn't the question. It's the relationship.
