121: Regaining your power, reclaiming your energy

Mart Tweedy shares how newborn sleep deprivation drained his energy, then walks through recovery: journaling, boundaries, asking for help. He recommends four crystals—amethyst, citrine, black tourmaline, rose quartz—with practical ways to use and cleanse them.
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Hello everyone and welcome back to another episode of Canny Crystals, the podcast. I hope that you're all well. My name is Mart Tweedy, I'm your host, and this week Daddy Life has completely taken over everything else in my universe. Nobody Nobody tells you about sleep deprivation, mind, do they? Honestly, I've heard people talk about baby brain before, but to be quite honest, I just thought it was a cop-out for being forgetful. But ladies, hear me when I say I feel you 1 million percent. There are some days that I feel like I've actually lost the plot completely, like I'm actually delirious. Just the other day, for example, Johnny sat up in a panic at about 10 PM and started frantically texting on his phone, and 2 minutes later he said, "I can't believe I've just done that." And when I asked what he'd done, he'd text one of his best friends a happy birthday message, and his friend had texted back saying, "Thanks, but it was 2 months ago, and you texted me on the day saying happy birthday then." Honestly, I think we're both just cracking up. So our little boy is going to bed at around 9 PM, and after a really, really, really sleepless first week, we just went out and bought every gadget going to help him drift off. So the first week he was sleeping for maybe 15 minutes at a time, like 15 minutes and then waking up screaming. We were demented. But through the day, he would literally sleep like an absolute baby. And I was like, why? Why is this happening? So we got a gadget that rocks his cradle, rocks him back to sleep. And then we got this nightlight thing that keeps the room at the perfect temperature. Then he also had this pod thing that he lies in within his cot to keep him on his back, because at just 5 days old, he flipped himself over onto his tummy. He's a very strong little boy. Then he also has this toy called You and the Sheep, and that plays womb sounds when he cries through the night. We've got these lavender sprays that one of Johnny's clients got sent to us. He has a galaxy star projector. You name it, we've got it. I probably think he's a bit overstimulated, if I'm being totally honest with you, but hey ho. Anyway, to cut a long story short, he is now sleeping in 3-hour rounds. Thank the Lord, honestly. So we go to bed at around 9 o'clock. He then wakes up for a feed at round about midnight, then 3 AM, and then I've been getting up with him at about 6 AM, which I honestly don't mind, to be honest, because, you know, I was doing the 5 AM Club all last year and I really enjoyed it. And the one thing that I can't do when I'm trying to do the 5 AM Club is get up when it is cold and dark outside. So this morning, for example, it was -3 here in Newcastle. It was pitch black. The heating hadn't yet kicked in and I was like, oh my God, this house is so cold. So I put the air fan thing on that we've got to heat the room up. Downstairs in the living room, and I came down and made a bottle and stuff, and I was just able to, you know, give him that feed and then think, well, I might as well turn my laptop on now and crack through loads of emails, crack through loads of messages, that kind of thing, get some stock ordered, you know. So it was really, really good for me actually, and I quite like that, like, time when I'm not being disturbed by life, or I haven't, like, got call after call or meeting after meeting, and I can just crack on with stuff. But because of waking up to feed him, sometimes it can take 45 minutes and then you just can't get back to sleep. And then when you do get back to sleep, bam, it's time for another feed. I do love him to bits, but Christ Almighty, is it draining. Nobody prepared me for that. I just thought it would be like getting another dog. So I thought, what better topic to discuss in this week's pod than feeling drained of energy, how to regain that energy, how to reclaim your power. Because earlier this week we went to a bit of a baby photo shoot that I had booked, and he cried for most of the day, probably because we were in a bit of a, you know, an unfamiliar place, bless him. And then on the way back home, he started crying in the car whilst we were on the motorway, and obviously I couldn't stop on the motorway. So I had Johnny trying to lean at the back to feed him a bottle. JJ, our dog, was then barking at Johnny thinking he was hurting him because he was crying. I was blasting womb sounds to soothe him We'd not eaten at all for the entire day. I was surviving on around 6 coffees. We got home and I put him on our bed whilst I went to the loo, and when I came back he had peed on our bed. So Johnny changed the bed. He had just finished putting the clean sheets on and JJ, our dog, decided to jump up into the middle of the bed and projectile vomit everywhere. So while Johnny changed the bed sheets for a second time, I went in the shower and I was just rocking back and forth as though I had hold of the baby in me arms the whole time, even though I didn't. And then for some reason I put shower gel on my hands and rubbed it into my hair. And once I realized I'd done that, I thought, Martin, what are you doing? So I put shampoo in my hands and I went out to wash my armpits with it. I got out the shower and I was like, Johnny, I need a cuddle. And he must have thought I'd absolutely lost it. I started crying and everything. I was like, oh my God, what is happening to me? Anyway, life update over. Let's get cracking with what we can do to counteract that feeling of being drained 24/7 and how to reclaim that energy and regain our power. So not just in my life right now, just in general everyday life, feeling drained of energy is probably more common than you think, and it happens to all of us. There is not one of us in the world that won't go through life without feeling drained at some specific point in it. So that might be to, you know, the demands of work or personal challenges or the constant barrage of information and stimulation. That depletion of energy can really leave us feeling powerless and kind of adrift almost. Yet it's in these moments of exhaustion that the opportunity to regain our power and to, you know, rejuvenate our spirit, it's when that all emerges. So I thought today I would talk about some of the most practical strategies for reclaiming the energy and the strength, emphasizing the importance of self-awareness, self-care, boundary setting, mindfulness, but also looking into what crystals we can use to counteract all that bullshit. Because it is all bullshit. We don't need that drain of energy. We don't need that energy depletion at all. So where does this energy drain feeling come from? Because understanding the roots of our energy depletion is the first step towards regaining our power. So often it's not just physical tiredness, but it's also like emotional and mental fatigue that weighs the heaviest. So it might not be, you know, that we're aching from the gym or anything like that. It's this emotional and mental fatigue that is getting to us the most because we're not sleeping, or, you know, we're not doing anything for us in terms of our own mental well-being. We're stressed, we're anxious, you know, we're overcommitted to things, we have unresolved emotional issues, we neglect our own needs in favor of others. And that can all contribute to this sense of being drained. But once we recognize these factors, that's crucial because the solutions aren't, they're not just physical, but they're holistic. They address every single aspect of our being. So I'm sure you probably remember me saying at the start of this year that, you know, health is wealth. That was gonna be my motto of the year. Well, in the last 2 and a half weeks that we've been placed with our little boy, I've barely left the house, let alone been in the gym. Every day we've either had a foster carer support worker, a social worker, a midwife, a health visitor, or some other health professional in the house. Or we've had to go to the adoption center and have meetings. So my health has totally gone to shit, and this is probably why I'm feeling this physical tiredness and why I'm feeling this mental fatigue. And I'm going to go as far as saying that, you know, self-awareness is the foundation of reclaiming our energy because it involves tuning into our bodies and our minds to recognize the signs of fatigue before reaching that physical breaking point. And by developing a keen understanding of our limits and our triggers and what truly replenishes us and fills our cup up, we can then start to make choices that will then align with our well-being. So there are things, you know, like journaling, meditation, reflective practices. They're all valuable tools in cultivating that awareness, and that's going to enable us to identify patterns and make conscious changes in our lives. So this week, for example, I've really tuned into what's going on for me, and I've been managing it daily when I'm about to reach that point of exhaustion. And I'm doing things to help with that, such as, you know, I turned the notifications on my WhatsApp, for example. I am in so many business group chats you wouldn't believe. And obviously with having a baby, people have been messaging to say congratulations and well done and oh my God, show some photos and stuff. And although it's nice, the WhatsApp messages have been building up because I just haven't had capacity to read them. It's really hard to get through them. Someone the other day sent me a 17-minute voice note. 17 minutes! Straight away I was like, I haven't got the time for that. I put it on twice the speed. I got about 3 minutes in and I was like, I'm sorry, I really can't listen to this. The other day I realised that that was the thing that was stressing me out the most. So I was self-aware of that trigger. I realised what that trigger was and I turned off me WhatsApp notifications. Yes, they're building up even more. I think at one point last week I even had over 600 notifications on WhatsApp, which I agree is wild, but it's stressful enough without having those 600 notifications to plough me way through. It's like, you know, if you've been off work for a week and you come back to work and you open up your inbox and you had 600 emails in there, you would feel like, you know, that you were going to spend your entire first day back just wading through emails. And I used to get like that in the NHS. It is really fucking stressful. So apologies if you've WhatsApp'd me and I haven't got back to you. That is why prioritizing self-care is something that can really, really help with reclaiming that power. And self-care is often touted as, you know, this magic pill for all forms of exhaustion. Yet carrying it out can be challenging because of our busy schedules. True self-care goes beyond the occasional indulgence. It's not just about, you know, having that bubble bath. I spoke about this a few weeks ago. It's not about just having a candlelit bubble bath and a little massage here and there. It's about integrating practices into our daily lives that are going to nourish us from the inside out, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. So this could mean setting aside time for physical activity, going to the gym, going for a walk, you know, cooking yourself something nice, ensuring that you get enough sleep, engaging in hobbies that bring us joy. Importantly, self-care also involves seeking help when needed. And this is something that, you know, we as a nation just don't do because we think that we are hindering other people with our problems. But in actual fact, our friends and our family and our support network, they are there to help us. So whether that be through therapy, counseling, coaching, support groups, support networks. Just recognize that sometimes, you know, regaining our power means leaning on other people for support and help because people are there to help us. Setting healthy boundaries is another great way to help you. So a significant drain on our energy comes from failing to set and maintain healthy boundaries. So whether that be with work or relationships or even social obligations, The inability to say no can lead us to overextend ourselves. Like, have you ever been stressed to shit and you thought, oh my God, I need to get all of this work done, I need to feed my family and everything because so-and-so's coming over at 6 o'clock? Don't be scared to say no. I'm sure they'll understand if you need to rearrange. You know, we just need to not be as polite as we are as a British nation and just think, you know, it is safe to say no because otherwise we're going to overextend ourselves. We are gonna feel like absolute crap trying to cram everything else into. So 2 weeks ago, for example, well, it's actually 3 weeks ago today. 3 weeks ago, we got back from the hospital and we had call after call from family and friends wanting to visit to meet him. Obviously, it's amazing that we've got that network. Obviously, it's lovely that, you know, we're well thought of by our friends and family. The amount of cards and gifts he was showered with was absolutely amazing. But at one point, I just felt like saying, you know, please just leave us alone for 24 hours. I just want to rest. And that's all I wanted. Because learning to set boundaries is— well, really, when you think about it, it's an act of self-respect and a declaration of our worth. It's telling us, you know, that we are worthy of this peace and we are worthy of this rest. We're gonna allow ourselves to do this. It involves communicating our needs and our limits clearly and without that guilt. So we prioritize our well-being and just being willing to enforce these boundaries even when we're faced with resistance. And I bang on about this all the time as well, but embracing mindfulness and gratitude is so powerful in reclaiming your energy. I don't know if you are part of Francesca Amber from Law of Attraction Changed My Life's book club. So she has a book club, and last month in January, we did Fran's own book called Grateful AF. I was doing that alongside my own book, 31 Days of Gratitude, and I think I got about 15 days in. Obviously we started getting notifications that we were going to be collecting a baby in a few days, so we started panic buying things, and my gratitude process slipped. And it wasn't until this last week I have actually opened my journal and I was like, oh my God, I haven't wrote in this in even a month now, it's like 3 weeks. And I just thought it's time for me to embrace this gratitude again because like I say, it is so powerful in reclaiming our energy, and I've been depleted of that energy. So mindfulness and gratitude practices can really impact our energy levels. And by bringing our attention to the present moment, we can then reduce all the mental clutter that often leads us to that exhaustion. And mindfulness will help us to detach from the constant stream of thoughts and worries. That's going to offer us that sense of peace and clarity. And similarly, gratitude— that's going to shift our focus from what we lack to what we have. That's going to foster a positive mindset, and that can energize and uplift us., and it's simple practices like mindful breathing or keeping that gratitude journal going that can really help us integrate these attitudes into our daily routine and help us foster this feeling of not feeling drained and exhausted all the time. Finding strength in vulnerability is another perfect way to look into reclaiming your power, because when you think about it, regaining our power when we feel drained That kind of necessitates embracing vulnerability and acknowledging our tiredness, admitting that we need a break, or asking for help. They are not signs of weakness, they are signs of strength. We are literally reaching out to people. We are saying, you know, I need support, I need a break, I need help. Yeah, they are not signs of weakness, they are signs of strength. And in that vulnerability, we then find the courage to honor our needs and take the necessary steps to then replenish our energy. And it's that openness that can also deepen our connection with other people, because it's going to invite that genuine interaction and support with other people. Feeling drained of energy is— you've got to see it as a signal from your body and your mind that something needs to change, okay? So when you're feeling stressed, when you're feeling exhausted, when you're feeling anxious, all of the above, that is your body saying to you something needs to change. And by addressing those root causes and practicing self-awareness and that self-care, setting healthy boundaries, embracing mindfulness and gratitude, we can then begin to reclaim our power. It's a journey of small, consistent steps towards understanding and honoring our needs. It's one where, you know, each act of self-care is a building block in restoring our energy and our vitality. And in the process, we not only regain our power, but we also learn to navigate life with a renewed sense of resilience and purpose. So let's look at how crystals will help us to regain that power when we're feeling drained. For anyone that's new listening this week, or you want a bit of a refresher, let's start with the basics. We might as well, we've got time. So crystals have been used for centuries for healing properties, and they are believed to offer physical, emotional, and spiritual benefits. So today we're going to focus on their ability to help us recharge and regain our strength. But before we dive into those specific crystals, I think it's important to understand how they work. So crystals vibrate at different frequencies. These vibrations can then interact with our own energy field and our own vibration, our own frequencies. So when we're feeling drained, our energy is going to be low. So by introducing the right crystal with a complementary frequency, we can then enhance and uplift our own energy, and that's going to promote that balance and that healing.. So let's talk about crystals that can help us when we're feeling like we need to reclaim that power, regain that energy. I'm going to keep it really, really simple here in the hope that you have at least one of these to hand, I'll say. So the first is amethyst. Most of you will have an amethyst if you have any crystals at all. So amethyst is known for its protective and purifying properties, and it can help clear negative energy and bring about that tranquility and that peace. So it's perfect for when you're feeling, you know, that little bit of overwhelm or that bit of stress, because it can bring about that sense of peace, calm, and tranquility, and just really help you to regain that energy that you feel has been zapped away from you in the first place. The second crystal that I'm going to recommend is citrine. Most of you, if you have amethyst, you will have citrine as well. Citrine is known as the sunshine crystal, but it's all about positivity and joy, okay? So citrine can help dissipate and get rid of all those dark moods, and it's going to replace them with optimism. And that energy to tackle what's ahead in your life. When it changes our mood like that, it's helping us to reclaim that positive energy and bring it all back into our lives. And I was going to say 3 crystals, but I've just thought of a 4th. So we've got black tourmaline as your 3rd crystal. So black tourmaline is considered one of the most powerful protectors because it absorbs all that awful black negativity that might come about in your life. And black tourmaline can help shield you from negative vibes and stress. It's going to ground you. It's going to restore your energy by allowing all the goodness to come to you. So I want you to kind of see it as a sieve, you know, it's going to filter out all that crap and leave behind all the good stuff. And then lastly, I'm going to say a simple rose quartz. This is probably the most common crystal that you will ever come across. Rose quartz is the crystal of unconditional love, healing, and nurturing. That's going to help you to refill your emotional reserves and help you to get that inner power back, because sometimes feeling drained is a sign of Mart Tweedy, self-love internally. So let's look at incorporating these crystals into our daily routine, because knowing about crystals is one thing, but then how do you use them effectively? So here are some of my top tips. The first is to carry them with you at all times, okay? So keep a crystal in your pocket or your purse, or even shove down your bra if you don't have pockets. And when you feel drained, I just want you to hold it in your hand to draw on its energy. I want you to talk to it. Tell it, "Help me reclaim my energy." Okay, the more you talk to your crystal, you might look like a psychotic bitch, but the more you talk to your crystal, the more you are going to set that intention with it. The next is to meditate with it. So place a crystal on your body or hold one in each of your hands during meditation. That's going to enhance the energy exchange. You could even visualize lots of white light being drawn into your body like a magnet and having it all fly towards you from that crystal in your hand. I find that that works really, really well for me. Might not work for you, but give it a shot. You might want to even just imagine, you know, that you're holding this in your hand. You've got this crystal in your hand, so you close your eyes and the crystal starts radiating this white glow, and this white glow works its way up your arm, through your chest, up into your head, down your body, down your torso, down your legs, and it just fills up your entire body. Do what works best for you. You could even create a crystal grid, so you can arrange crystals in a grid at home or in your office to create a kind of protective and recharging energy field in your space. And I'd say one of the most popular ways to use crystals is to wear crystal jewelry. Now, this is not only a stylish choice, but it's also a powerful way to keep your chosen crystal's energy with you throughout the day. And I sell these on cannycrystals.co.uk, shameless plug, but I do. I've got like rose quartz bracelets, black tourmaline bracelets, citrine bracelets, everything that we spoke about today. Just a simple bracelet around your wrist, okay, it's going to give you that energy all throughout the day. You don't need any prior thought to keep getting it out of your pocket or anything like that. It's always touching your skin, and like I said, they look cool as well. But remember, just like us, crystals can become drained as well, and it's important to cleanse and charge them regularly. So this will make sure that you get the absolute most out of their energy. I describe it all the time as kind of like a mobile phone. We all have mobile phones, but we charge them at the end of every day when we go to bed, don't we? So that's us giving them love. Well, I'm assuming that you do anyway. I know we do. If I didn't charge me phone, it would either die overnight or would run out of juice the next day when I needed it the most. So it's so important that you charge and cleanse your crystals as well. So as a reminder, I tell people to do this every full and new moon because then it's getting done every 2 weeks minimum. But what I do personally is every Sunday I'll just run around the house for 10 minutes with an incense stick or sage or palo santo or a sound bowl. And you can cleanse crystals in a multitude of ways. So some of my favorite are, you know, placing them under moonlight during a full moon. It doesn't need to be in direct moonlight. If you haven't got a garden, for example, you might find this a little hard to do. So you could put them underneath a see-through Tupperware box or a Pyrex dish or a cloche, just to protect them from the rain or the wind. Or you can even pop them on your car dashboard or your bedroom windowsill. As long as they are exposed to the light at some point, they'll be cleansed and charged. You could smudge them with sage or palo santo or an incense stick. Just light it, let it start to smolder, and run the crystals through the smoke in your hands. The smoke will wash away all the impurities and those negative energies that the crystal itself is storing. You can use sound vibrations from a singing bowl or a bell. So just by pinging the sound bowl, that frequency is going to travel around the room, it's going to wash over the crystal and doing the same as what the smoke is doing. You know how we can't see certain things but dogs can, for example? It's just like that. Or have you seen that TikTok that's doing its rounds at the minute? You know, where they put sand down on this huge metal plate and then they ping a huge singing bowl next to it? The sound vibrates and it forms zigzag lines in the sand. Just because we can't physically see sound with our eyes doesn't mean to say it's not happening. Rinsing them in natural water is another way, but I don't often recommend it because so many crystals aren't water safe. If you've been a long time listener of the pod, you'll remember that time that I put a red aura quartz in the bath with me, fell asleep, and I woke up and I thought I was bleeding because there was red floating around everywhere. All the aura coating had come off the crystal. So some aren't water safe. And I always remember someone saying to me that their selenite tower had fallen apart heart after they were taking it in the bath every day with them after hearing that I'd bathed with my crystals. Please, please, please, if you are going to do this, do your research first. Or cleansing them in the sea or a river, you know, however you're going to put them in water, please do your research first. It is a great way to naturally cleanse and recharge, but just be careful because I can't be held responsible if your crystals dissolve. Sorry. But above all of this, I just want you to remember that whilst crystals are powerful for healing and recharging your energy, that true power, that true power lies within you. And I want you to realize that, like, crystals are here to support and enhance the energy that's already within you. They help you to reconnect with your own strength and resilience, but it's you that have the power inside of you at all times to reclaim that energy and regain your power. So just to end this episode, I want you to repeat these next 3 affirmations with me. You might want to close your eyes. Obviously don't do this if you're listening whilst driving. Or operating like heavy machinery. But if you can, please close your eyes. Just feel that energy in the center of your chest where your heart is, right between your boobs, and just feel any emotions that are there right now. And just take a deep breath in and then a deep breath back out again. And I just want you to repeat these 3 statements with me. I choose strength, courage, and love to shape my life today. I reclaim my power and regain all that was taken from me. I release the old and welcome in new energy. And that's it. I hope that you all enjoyed this episode. One quick thing to mention before I do shoot off today is that I have restarted my YouTube channel lately, and I'm going to be uploading lots of free meditations, EFT visualizations, mindfulness exercises, crystal chat, etc., etc., etc., all over on YouTube. So if you are on YouTube, go and give me a follow or a subscribe. I don't know what it's called on there, I haven't really paid much attention. My link is youtube.com/@cannycrystals, but I'm pretty sure I'll come up as well if you just head to YouTube and just search Canny Crystals. I'm sure it'll come up. Just have a look. Go and subscribe. Go and follow me. Lots of free content coming every single Sunday. If you've enjoyed this episode, please rant and rave about it on social media. Tag us on Instagram. I'll give you a mention on my story as well. Please feel free to rate, review, subscribe. Visit the website cannycrystals.co.uk, enter the word podcast for 10% off everything, and I will see you all next Friday for another episode of Candy Crystals the Podcast. Take care guys, bye!
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