I'll Feel Like a Failure Until £1,000,000 Per Month - Documenting the journey - Episode 18

Back with another episode of Document the Journey, I think episode 16 or 17, something like that. Haven't even checked. Haven't done one in a while, like a week and a half. And I feel like these episodes may get a bit monotonous, a bit boring, but as I've said many times, that's kind of the nature of it. It really is just documenting the process. And a lot of that process maybe is A, boring, or B, I won't have come up with anything elaborate to present what's happened in like the past week and shit. And in the interest of just keeping it consistent and honest, I'm just gonna document it when I don't feel like documenting as well, which has kind of been a theme in the past month for me. Kind of shied away from doing more pods. Haven't felt particularly inspired to make videos and pods and even like for the brand stuff, to be honest, but just been getting on with it. I think that is the purpose of this documenting is, you know, a lot of it's not gonna be exciting, most of it, to be honest. Maybe I could make it, maybe I could present it better, but for now I'm just. This is for my own sake, really. And if people want to watch it, that's great. If they don't, that's also fine. I made a few notes. As always, I'm not going to share stuff on screen. I really should come up with some more exciting so you can actually see what I'm working on. But to be honest, I really didn't really want to do this episode this week. I just wasn't feeling it. Haven't really been feeling it in the past few weeks, but I said I would. And yeah, I want to be able to look back on it even when. Even when I don't feel like doing it. So, yeah, a lot of people follow me, know that the fucking brand Instagram page got disabled for a third time. This is getting a bit crazy. I feel like maybe partly putting this stuff out is attracting attention and some people are disabling it, but I'm getting it properly sorted this time. It's taking longer than before, but I'm not going to dwell on that. It is getting resolved. It does kill momentum, I can't lie. Costs the business a lot of money every time it happens to fix it. And, you know, obviously like ad performance, as anyone knows, you know, stuff stops and starts, stops and starts. Does not help, but hasn't. It's not like the whole business relies on. In the Instagram page, we run Ads from other places, of course, and other channels. But yeah, it's getting sorted. That's all good. We're still scaling very nicely into September. Instagram hasn't helped. The start of September definitely has knocked it a little bit, but what can you do? I'm kind of used to this sort of stress now, so when it happens for a third time, I just think, oh, fuck, it's annoying, but you get it sorted and you move on. Hasn't happened to many other brands three times in my. In my experience. But yeah, maybe it's attracting the wrong kind of attention, I don't know. But we're getting it sorted. Launched on Amazon, I think I mentioned before, that's gone very well, to be fair. A lot better than I thought. Organically doing like a thousand pound plus per day on there. I say organically, obviously, like people are seeing ads elsewhere, but we're not. You know, we're spending like 20 pound on PPC on Amazon. So I think that channel could be mad because like the net margin after everything is like 30%, which I don't know about other people, but I've never seen that DTC. I probably never will see that D2C. So fill up Amazon. Solid diversification. It's definitely helps, obviously when Instagram's been down, kind of spread into Amazon, so I'm keen to push that same. Same as retail. A few conversations going on there that I've mentioned the past as well, but that shit just takes a lot longer. We actually launched in like 20. I say launched, did this like testing, launch thing in 20 different small niche like boutique London stores. It's like via this agency platform thing, basically send them free products. So I can't exactly say it's free, so but it's like a test and then if they like it, they can restock it. It's not going to move the needle on revenue or anything like that, but I just thought it'd be interesting to get product out physically into shops. So that's also gone live alongside Amazon. Recently I've ordered 20,000 more rainbow dust units, so that makes it 38,000 in total that I'll have bought and paid for since we launched, which is lot of fucking rainbow dust, to be fair. So 38,000 packs, that's pretty cool. Obviously you want to have cash in the bank, but I think cash is better spent especially when you know that you're growing. And yeah, obviously we can't, we can't grow as quick as I want to grow without having a shitload of Stocks especially going into Q4 and early into next year. So 20,000 more rainbow dust on the way. Got 4,000 dream dust on the way that'll be launching soon in about two months time. Yeah, just gonna run through like actual business shit first and I'll get onto a few other things. One thing I'm noticing as well is, I mean, and this is stuff that suppliers are telling me, I'm getting my supplier and other suppliers who are approaching me, emailing me, saying, you know, we've had five inquiries sending your website effectively asking people to, asking us to rip off Rainbow Dust and do you know, their version, which is annoying, but it's kind of inevitable. I think that's a good sign actually. It means that, you know, the market is ripe and people see an opportunity there and they potentially look at space goods and Rainbow Dust as, you know, a good benchmark product, particularly in the uk. I think it's caught the attention of a lot of people, customers and, you know, other entrepreneurs and potential competitors and existing competitors alike is annoying. But yeah, I'm kind of half expecting in the next three to six months to see like an exact rip with the same packaging and everything. But that'd be funny because I'll just call them out on Twitter or whatever. But yeah, I think ultimately if you're not first and it isn't your idea, you're gonna struggle. That's my view. Another thing that I've been noticing a lot is like, I kind of just mentioned there getting approached by a lot of suppliers that are saying, like, basically tell us what you're paying currently, we'll undercut it. Which is quite an interesting conversation because, you know, I've built relationship with my current supplier which I'm obviously not gonna share and I haven't shared and I don't plan on sharing publicly. I think they're really good. I've met them in person. They're nice people, they do the job really well. Do I think we probably get better unit pricing? Maybe. I don't know if they're watching this, but yeah, other suppliers are coming in saying, you know, we'll undercut them, whatever. It's not necessarily going to work for me because I've already built relationship. There's trust, there's, you know, a business history since like November when I started working on this with these, with my actual suppliers. So. But yeah, it's interesting because, yeah, obviously that's just what's going to happen. But cheaper isn't always better. I'm very, very aware of that also. Getting approached by and have had a few calls with recently, like venture capital, PE funds. I mean, obviously they're just a lot of these companies and funds, you know, they'll do the rounds, they'll see a new brand and think, you know, they're on our radar. Let's reach out to the founder, have a call. Some of which I've had calls with, I guess, just kind of planting seeds. I'm also interested to see what they're looking for, you know, particularly in this market we're going into, which everyone's saying is a massive recession. It's kind of scary. What are they looking for in terms of brands that they want to deploy capital into, basically? So I think it's always useful getting on those calls, a few of which I have done in the past few weeks, just off the back of cold emails to me and yeah, just telling them a bit about my background. Obviously not revealing too much about the business, but giving them an idea, planting some seeds. It could be a relationship that goes into an investment or a deal or an acquisition. Long term, you never know. So I think it's useful to have those conversations. I always enjoy speaking about the business, kind of selling my vision. It comes very naturally to me. I think I'm very good at rambling, as anyone that watches this will know. So, yeah, that's been interesting. I'm literally reading off bullet points here. Everyone's gonna hate me because I do this every time. I said the other day, it's now like just over five months since I launched the brand officially, which is fucking flown by, by the way. April 13th. I felt like the honeymoon period is very much worn off. You know, when you get super excited. You've been working on the creative stuff and the product stuff only right at the start and then obviously you grow and then there's more and more problems and there always will be problems, but it becomes, you know, feel like, ah, it's an actual job now. I mean, of course it is, but you know, at the start, super excited. See the initial response, everything's new, every Instagram tag is new, every good review, every good review, bad review, every whatever is new. Whereas now it's very repeatable. I'm obviously. And people take the piss as well, say I'm in the trenches all the time, but I very much feel like I'm in the trenches. That's where I want to be right now. That's where I have to be. And yeah, I just feel like the honeymoon period has worn off, but that's the reality of any business. Certainly the reality of any business that, you know, that has goals like I do. And I'm very aware that, yeah, a lot of it's not that fun, A lot of it's not that exciting. It's just the grunt work that has to be done. But you definitely see the compounding effects of that over time, which I'm already starting to see, obviously, like consistent growth and everything, which is good. So, yeah, honeymoon period is well and truly over five months in and probably, probably another two, three, four, five years to go until I get to where I want to be, depending on what happens, of course. On a personal note, I feel like I've been getting so distracted by social media, Instagram in particular. I think everyone can relate to this. And amount of times I've tried to delete my person, I say delete, like delete the app, log out my personal Instagram in the past. And it's just I've gone right back to it because, you know, searching for that dopamine here, I don't know what it is. Maybe I need to do like a proper dopamine detox. Like I know your man's done videos on that, which I've watched, which is super useful. I've never really fully implemented it. Feel like the next few months going into Q4 is probably time to do that. So, I mean, I say that I'll end up doing a post when I do the Sub three marathon. And I'm sure, but trying to stay off, like everyone does it. You think you're not a big social media user. I used to say that about myself. But then, you know, you're stalking certain people's Instagram stories, you're posting random shit that no one cares about, you know, refreshing, whatever, just looking for a little dopamine hit. I think we're all guilty of that. And it's kind of crazy really. Tick tock as well. I say I don't use tick tock. I find myself scrolling on that a little bit. It's just a distraction. It's not even just a time waste. It's more like just takes my mental energy away and that can carry through into other things and you know, just being a bit more tunnel vision for a while, you know, like seasons. Of course in summer, I travel a lot, as everyone knows, do a lot of cool shit. But I think that's only valuable if you have other seasons where you're not doing that and you are a bit more locked in. And definitely like the next three, four or five months in particular are that period for me. So I'm really trying to dial it in, like not drinking at all, certainly until the marathon. And, and yeah, that brings me on to the next thing because I don't know, I fucking ramble about this shit all the time. So please stop watching if it bothers you. But I guess this is therapeutic for me in a way. I put a Twitter poll up saying like, can you have work, life balance and be, you know, 0.01% successful, build an exceptional business, etc. Etc. And as expected, the results were pretty varied. I think it was like 70, 30 no to yes. But I wanted to kind of share my thoughts on that and maybe let me know what you think in the comments. And I know a lot of people replied to that on Twitter. Like, interestingly enough, some of my investors, including Alex, he's probably the most successful entrepreneur that applied to it. But his, his take on it was that you can, you can be physically balanced in terms of that you can go away and so on, which I guess is what I do. But what he said was so true is that you can't be mentally balanced, you know, in the sense that you're always going to be thinking about the business, even when you're with a girlfriend, with, with mates, whatever it is with your family. I mean, I certainly find myself always consumed about, you know, what's happening next. I guess the ups and downs, worries, concerns, excitements, whatever. And I'm sure anyone watching this can relate. So I think he summarized it best. I think most people agree with him. And yeah, I think you don't have to like literally lock in at a computer all the time because that's actually not productive. But certainly mentally you're always gonna be thinking about it. Like I would get in trouble with my ex girlfriend back in the, in the day for having a conversation, but not being there because I was thinking about something else. I think it's that sort of thing. You know, you could physically not be on a computer, you could be on a holiday even, and you're still thinking about work. And when that's your passion and what you care about, it's probably always going to be that way. But for me, yeah, I've always had a. I think I've always had a pretty decent balance. But you could argue maybe that's why I'm not. Well, I certainly don't consider myself to have got to the top 0.01%. I mean, maybe if my age, in my early 20s, I did and yeah, probably did, to be fair, terms of the numbers and shit. But yeah, I think, I think you have to be happy as well to be productive and work. So if all you're doing is working. And I really, I really found myself debating this and I started journaling recently as well, like physical pen and paper. And this is something I've been toying with. It's like, where is that balance? Because say I just sucked off social life, you know, didn't have a dating life or whatever, like the next three years, hypothetically, that probably make me less effective because I'd be less, less happy in my own mind, less settled, you know. So yeah, it's about figuring that out for yourself because locking yourself in a room with a computer for 16 hours a day, you know, you could do a better eight hours of work if you're healthy, you know, you're doing exercise, you're doing other shit. But yeah, I think the fundamental conclusion, which I agree with is work out the physical balance of your time. But the reality is, yeah, mentally you're probably always going to be 100% in, especially if you want to do big things, which also not everyone has to do and not everyone wants to do. I think a lot of people, and myself included at times kid themselves thinking I want to be the next Elon Musk or you know, I want to build a billion pound startup, which of course is very easy to say. And it's often people that have never even done a million in revenue or whatever that say those things. And I completely emphasize with that because you kind of come, come at every angle with extreme views when you're getting started, I think, and then you get a bit more context and you realize how hard certain things are and you kind of find out what you're interested in a bit more and you come to the conclusion that maybe your goals are different than they used to be, or they're bigger or they're smaller or they're just more tailored to you. For me, I think I still have probably bigger goals than I used to in the past, ironically, because I've kind of, I'm self aware enough now and I guess life experience enough to realize that for me the biggest thing that makes me happy and fulfilled, certainly fulfilled, I think that's more important than happiness. Like overall is progression and if I'm not progressing, whether it's in, you know, in the gym, in my friend, friendships, relationships, if I have one or trying to have a new one or whatever it is or anything in between, I'm a business, then I just feel like and I think progression is for me, like, I think for a lot of people is like the greatest drug. If you like it, it's the thing you want to always be moving the needle forward, but at the same time the goalposts are always moving. Right? So like 5 months ago if you said, you know, I'd have done X amount of revenue, the business would look like this and I'd have raised even more money and have these investors involved, you know, certainly a year ago I'd have been like, hell, that'd be a great place to be. Because back then I was in a really bad spot mentally, like, and the goal posts are always moving so it's kind of hard to be satisfied because second, you get somewhere, the goalposts obviously move and that's, that's just life and certainly that's entrepreneurship. I think that's why that's the way a lot of our brains work. You know, I say our being people that are entrepreneurs and think that way in a very goal driven, certainly how my mind works. But yeah, it's important on the flip side of that to actually look how far you've come in like five months, six months, a year, I think six months and a year. Probably very solid time periods to look at how life's going. And honestly I don't recognize myself a year ago because I was a fat fuck for a start. I was about two stone heavier, wasn't working on this brand at all, was very lost after what happened with the previous brand. So yeah, it's interesting. And yeah, I think the thing that gives you fulfillment is progression and that is obviously always moving. And, and one thing I've become very aware of, I started seeing a new therapist recently and this has been way too, way too honest about shit. But that's kind of the nature of this channel, is that I feel like I've been massively corrupted. My bar has been corrupted, if you like, by the numbers I saw and you know, made and I guess elements of lifestyle I had in my early 20s, particularly from the drop shipping side because I was doing like a million quid a month when I was 22. I was driving an Audi R8 when I was 22, my first supercar, all that shit, which was fucking great by the way, like really exciting and obviously that set the bar really high in terms of the things that like the level I guess I want to be playing at. Obviously I don't compare doing a million a month selling kitchen gadgets from AliExpress when Facebook ads were super cheap, which is what I was doing in 2018, I don't compare that directly to building a brand which is completely bespoke products and so on. But then obviously in 2020, people know the full story on that. I was running two brands, did over 10 million quid in revenue, made a load of money, and then obviously things went wrong as well and people know the story on that and then it bounced back from that. But the bar for my brands, because I've had two multi million pound brands in the past, which sounds really arrogant to say, but obviously one of them went fucking wrong. But it's like, because I've done it before and I've done it to a higher level and I was doing bigger numbers two years ago than I am right now. That's just a fact in terms of revenue and so on, even though they're not directly comparable to think the revenue now is much more valuable and so on. But ultimately, if I'd never scaled a business before, I might think right now, where I'm at, fucking hell, this is amazing. We're in month five and we're doing these numbers. Like most people would tell me that is amazing and I guess in many ways it is, but I'm looking back at, well, in 2020, I was doing one and a half million a month in September, October 2020, like combined revenue between the two brands, roughly. So. So for me it's like until I'm back doing a million a month plus, which I want to get to by the end of the first year, by the way. I think that's realistic. It's probably difficult, but realistic. Until I'm back doing that, I feel like a piece of shit basically, to be honest. That's just full transparency. And, you know, that is a downside of, I guess, achieving a lot when you're younger, which I certainly did. But it's also good because, you know, experience breeds confidence, right? There's that saying, and I've done it twice before, you know, done it dropshipping before as well. I've done it many times before at scale. I know how to scale things. And obviously I've taken lessons and failures and learnings from all those past things and I'm actively applying it to this one. So it gives me huge confidence that I can go way, way bigger than I am right now. And obviously we are growing and that's the plan. But obviously the flip side is I'm constantly in the back of my mind comparing myself to where I was two years ago. Even though I feel much wiser now, I am Much wiser now. I'm more skilled, I'm a better operator now for sure. I'm better at every part of growing an econ brand now. But because the numbers on the screen were bigger two years ago, I sometimes question, am I I'm actually good enough to do this shit? So it's kind of a weird paradox. And yeah, I guess this is a fairly philosophical episode, as almost always. Final point, I didn't really mention this, but thing I wanted to mention it is often like, because I'm so transparent about the I put out and I was kind of have been like, particularly in the pod. Is anyone that watches a lot of that, you know, you probably know everything about me to an extent. There's certain things that we'll never speak about on a podcast and you know, never will on this YouTube thing either. Nothing in particular, but I just imagine there is. But I'm always a bit like, am I sharing too much? Should I be? Should I try and polish everything so everyone thinks everything is perfect? But then I'm doing a disservice to my viewers and myself because I want it to be a realistic, not realistic. I want it to just be a real authentic documentation of what the fuck is happening. And even when I don't feel like recording an episode like today, to be honest, and last week, but in three years time, you know, the power of this for me, just, just for me, if not anyone else, is to look back on it and think that's. That's what actually what was happening at the time. So that's the weird thing about putting content out is I want to be authentic and so on, but obviously there's parts of my life and bits, certain thoughts I have or whatever that I probably never want to share because I don't know, I probably wouldn't even share them with a friend in many ways. So, yeah, it's an interesting one, but I hope this series is useful because it's just fucking real, to be honest, if it's boring because it's too real, maybe that's a good thing. Well, not a good thing, but maybe that's just the reality of it. It's not gonna be that interesting to watch in many ways. And yeah, I seem to always ramble for 20 minutes, but yeah, new sample mug, A lot of shit going on. It's Friday 16th September 2022, which feels mad to say, going Bali in like a month, which I'm excited about, to be fair. We've got the marathon in two and a bit weeks. I'm doing a VO2 max test tomorrow, which I'm intrigued about. I'm gonna film that, put on the issue probably in like 3 weeks time from now. And yeah, it's time to get the head down, I think, and just really go. Not monk mode, but just really fucking focus and move the needle for the next few months. That's certainly what I'm trying to do and appreciate you watching. As always. Subscribe to the channel. Space Goes to the Moon, let's go.