Covert Narcissism: 5 Unseen Signs of a Female Narcissist

Today we're talking about the COVID and dangerous female narcissist, the emotional abuse and harm they do, and some of the top signs that you may be dealing with. 1 this topic is especially important to me because almost all of my private clients tend to be children of narcissists, specifically narcissistic mothers. And the thing is, until we work together, most of my clients don't even see the narcissist hiding in plain sight. The good thing is, once you see it, you can't unsee it. And and that's why I want to discuss the five most common signs of a female narcissist. Hi there, I'm Meadow devore, helping you with strategies and tools to build self worth. On this channel, I share self development tips and practical ways to change your life. It's easy to overlook the female narcissist because they are often women who haven't emotionally matured beyond teenage mean girl tactics. They are often covert in their narcissistic tactics and they pretend to be vulnerable instead of dangerous. We don't see them because we're not looking for them. Instead, we often project kindness or empathy when there is none. We see a sweet young girl, a loving mother, a harmless old lady, or a catty best friend because we're taught not to see who they really are. In a lot of cases, we've been trained to not see it by the female narcissist in the center of it all. The truth is that women at any age can be vindictive, cruel and ruthless. Mothers are not always loving. Some of them abandon, neglect or abuse their children. Friends are not always friendly. Some are more than willing to use you, steal from you and hurt you. Here are the top five traits and behaviors to watch out for if you suspect you might have a female narcissist in your life and some tips on how to cope. Sign number one. A female narcissist lacks empathy and gets a sadistic sense of pleasure from your pain. Female narcissists struggle to understand and share the feelings of others, but they are more than willing to feed off of yours. They're self absorbed, placing their own needs above everyone else. They exploit or manipulate you without even a second thought. She gets off on bringing you down and this type of emotional abuse leaves a wake of destruction. It brings her a sick sense of joy when she shocks you, offends you, and watches you lose any sense of confidence. She's interested when you share your emotions, but not because she's empathetic. She's looking for information that either inflates her sense of grandiosity or will become currency to use against you. At first, she'll idealize you. This doesn't mean she likes you. Instead, it means she likes the way you make her feel about herself. She'll punish you when you threaten her fragile grandiosity or stop feeding her ego. She cannot engage in healthy, emotionally fulfilling relationships, so she enjoys sabotaging the relationships and friendships of others for her own personal entertainment. And she will do anything to hurt your self esteem. Speaking of self esteem, I just created a self worth workbook, a daily guide to build self esteem. In it, I share self care checklists, confidence affirmations, self esteem journaling, prompts, self love, wallpapers for your iPhone and devices, and daily activities to help you build self worth. And it's my gift to you for being part of my community, and I'm excited to share it with you. It's linked in the description below. Okay, on to number two. Female narcissists need constant validation. They have an insatiable sense of competitiveness due to pathological envy and the need to be the center of attention. They rely on you to validate their existence, and they'll do anything to remain in the spotlight. Their world revolves around compliments and attention, and they will go to great lengths to secure it. Some of the most abusive tactics will fall within the realm of family and friendship. The female narcissist scopes out who's a threat and who is a blind follower. If you're a threat in any way, whether it's success, appearance, personality, resources, status, desirability, or all of the above, she will cut you out and get rid of you, while those who are obedient will be kept around until they are no longer useful. If you're a threat, you might initially be placed on a pedestal to keep up appearances, but soon enough, she won't be able to handle her feelings of contempt, envy, and rage. So she'll set you up to fail. And then she'll make sure that the entire group knows that you are untouchable. You're an outsider. You're ostracized. Sign number three. Manipulative behavior disguised as care. She sabotages your friendships and relationships, stirring chaos within social groups. Female narcissists are masters of manipulation. They possess an uncanny ability to use you to their advantage, often employing subtle tactics to control and influence people. They exploit your vulnerabilities for personal gain, leaving a trail of emotional wreckage in their wake. The female narcissist may use you to gain access to resources or status. But if you stop doing your job, and in case you don't know what your job is, it's to make her feel good about herself, then she'll do a full social takedown. She'll start rumors, smear campaigns, and talk behind your back, spreading false and or humiliating information about you to try to maintain her false superiority, always positioning herself as being better, smarter and more powerful than you. She'll pit friends and family against each other and claiming that they're gossiping about one another when she in fact is the one manufacturing the conflict. You might have a female narcissist in your midst if you notice that others within the family or friend group exchange covert glances when you come into the room. The narcissist will be the one who's overly friendly, in contrast, covering up that she was the one talking about you behind your back. Or you might notice that you feel compelled to overshare your most intimate secrets with her. The narcissist will seem dishonest, charmingly sweet and trustworthy, but ends up using the information against you. She'll exploit what you've shared and use it to gain power. She'll talk down to you about your vulnerabilities and show smugness when she devalues your accomplishments. Sign number four is an excessive self importance, superiority and Grandiosity A female narcissist often displays an inflated self image, although she actually feels the exact opposite about herself. Attention is her lifeline and she thrives on admiration both online and off. The female narcissist battles with other females for dominance and uses her charm, fabricated vulnerabilities, faux humility, her appearance, or anything else to gain superiority. She will inflate whatever aspect might help her win against you. This might translate into a grandiose sense of physical, sexual, or intellectual superiority, an exaggerated tale of romance within her marriage, or using the achievements of her own children to gain the upper hand. She might covertly try to appear vulnerable, as if you are the one that's hurting her through your achievements. She might hurt you and bully you under the guise of constructive criticism. Of course she'll say you're being overly sensitive. If you get your feelings hurt, she'll do whatever it takes to make sure she's the one at the top of the dominance hierarchy and that you remain beneath her. Sign number five is an unhealthy sense of entitlement, a blatant disregard for boundaries, including her own. A female narcissist believes she deserves special treatment and privileges. She expects you to bend to her will and becomes frustrated or even angry when her desires aren't immediately fulfilled. Her sense of entitlement knows no bounds, which is why she ignores, crosses, and destroys any boundaries that you might try to put into place. The female narcissist wants to believe that she has an audience of admirers, friends, family, strangers, co workers, fans online and offline. It doesn't matter who they are or even if they exist. She sees the audience as something to use not only for validation, but more that it actually gives her proof that she exists. A narcissist can't live in a vacuum. She'll die without that steady supply of admiration. So she needs you as part of her imaginary audience to be boundaryless. To her, you're simply an extension of her existence. You're a tool to be used. If you set limits or make yourself unavailable for use, she'll resent you, punish you, and do whatever it takes to devastate you into compliance. The female narcissist's response to your boundaries will tell you every everything you need to know. Most narcissists can't stand to be ignored. They feel entitled to your constant attention, so they will continue to make persistent efforts until they get it or attempt to sabotage you if they fail. So to recap, here are the top five signs of a female narcissist. 1. Female narcissists lack empathy and get a sadistic sense of pleasure from your pain. 2. Female narcissists need constant validation. They have an insatiable sense of competitiveness due to pathological envy and the need to be the center of attention. 3. Her manipulative behavior is disguised as care. She sabotages your friendships and relationships, stirring chaos within social groups 4. She has excessive self importance, superiority and grandiosity and 5 she has an unhealthy sense of entitlement, a blatant disregard for boundaries, including her own.