Loving your child's mind: Watch your thoughts, they become your actions

a little quotation. So can you guys see the chat? Can either of you see the chat?

I can see the chat, but since I just got on, I don't see the message.

Okay, let me try resending it because sometimes you're right, Alana, it works like that, which is strange. Can you see it now, Alana?

Yeah, I can.

Sankara, can you see the chat?

You've done it twice.

Yes, I have. That's because Lana couldn't see it. Um, do one of you want to read it out loud?

Watch— oh my God, sorry. Okay, um, one second. Cancel. Watch your thoughts, they become your words. Watch your words, they become your actions. Watch your actions, they become your habits. They become your character. What's your character?

So does this little paragraph make sense at all?

Yeah, it does.

What is it saying?

Um, do the right thing.

Do the right thing. Okay.

Yeah.

Is that all it's saying? So they could have said exactly the same thing and just said, "Do the right thing"?

No, what I think it's mostly saying is just watch what you're saying, or watch— or maybe like it says, just watch your actions. Other than that, yeah.

So let's go bit by bit to see if we agree with every step. When they say, "Watch your thoughts, they become your words," what do you think they mean by that?

What was that? Nothing.

What, Sankara? I cannot hear you.

No, sorry, I was just, um, I just saw something.

So watch your thoughts, they become your words. How can your— how— well, first of all, uh, do thoughts always become words, or do thoughts only sometimes become words?

Sometimes become words, but they don't always.

So why should you watch your thoughts if they sometimes become words and sometimes don't become words?

Because they become words, then— no, you can continue.

Sankara, it's a little bit confusing. I think Alana and I are not sure when you're talking to us and when not. So can you be sure only to talk when you're talking to us? Does that make sense? Okay, thank you. And what were you saying, Alana?

Um, yeah, I was saying that it does— well, probably what he means by that is maybe for the author, or maybe for the author sees that most people, whenever they think about saying something, they say it, or maybe they just blurt it out.

And do you think that's a good idea or not?

In some cases, no. Some cases, I think you should think about your words.

Okay, what do you think, Sankara? Do you think that we should always say whatever we think or not necessarily?

Not necessarily.

How do we know when we should say what we think and when we should not say what we think?

If it's right, you should say it, but if it's unkind, then you should not say it.

So it kind of goes back to your original claim that what this paragraph is saying is doing the right thing?

Yeah.

Okay, do you agree, Ilana?

I do.

So watch your thoughts, they become words. How about watch your words, they become actions? Do your words always become actions?

Not always.

So when should we have our words become actions, and when should we not have our words become actions?

When they're unkind, you shouldn't do it. Um, kind, you should. You can.

You agree, Alana?

Um, I didn't really hear that. Can he say that again?

Please say it again, Sankara.

Um, if your words are unkind, you shouldn't turn them into actions, and, um, if they're kind, you can. Yeah, I agree with that.

Okay, then watch your actions, they become your habits. How do actions become habits?

Well, maybe because you just do it over and over again without thinking.

Okay, you do it over and over again without thinking. And what did you say, Sankara?

Um, I was going to say a similar thing to Alana.

Okay. Um, and do you think that it's okay for all actions to become habits, or is it important that only some actions become habits?

Some.

Which ones?

Because some actions and habits might be really bad.

Okay. And then, watch your habits, they become your character. What does that mean?

Well, if you do habits too many times and you stop, you're used to it. Mm-hmm. You just become that person that's doing whatever the habits are, so it might change your personality.

Okay. Um, what were you gonna say, Sankara?

Um, a similar thing to Alana.

Okay, so, and she's interpreting character as personality. Is that how you understand character?

Pardon?

She interpreted character as personality. Would you say character is the same as personality?

Yeah.

Okay, um, in which case, when it says, 'Watch your character, it becomes your destiny,' what does that mean?

It means if, if, if you have your habits too many times, then you might end up doing something good, and, and, or you might end up doing something bad, like what's going to happen in the future.

Okay, what do you think, Alana?

I think that that line maybe means that, um, maybe that since that's your character, you don't— like, if it's bad, you don't change it. If it's good, you don't change it. So that's based on your destiny.

And what does it mean for something to be your destiny?

To be your destiny is like Maybe something has to happen to you, or maybe just, yeah, that happens later in life.

So this, this whole sequence, I mean, thought, we have thoughts all the time. And so it sounds like according to you two, if we don't watch our thoughts, that could determine what happens in our whole life, or am I exaggerating?

Yeah, not your whole life. I don't think so.

But will destiny— you said destiny is what's going to happen to you, right?

Wait, can you say that again?

You said destiny is what is going to happen to you, correct?

Yes, like if you have just something planned for you. Well, not planned for you, but destiny is just what you're gonna eventually do, maybe.

But, but see what if every step along this path makes sense, then it seems to be saying, and maybe I have it wrong, that if you think certain things, then potentially that could be what happens to you. Because you said your destiny is what happens to you, and so I'm looking for what connection is there between how you think and what happens to you in terms of your destiny.

Okay.

So are they connected or are they not connected?

I think they're connected.

So can you explain it, the whole thing?

From the beginning and then to the end? Okay, so first, watch your thoughts to become your words. Well, your thoughts, you think about— sometimes people don't think, so you just think something, then you want to blurt it out or just say it to someone. And depending if that's bad or good, watch your words, they become your actions. Your words might do something bad or good. Actions might be bad or good, like actions, like maybe trying to learn things, that could be good. And then watch your actions, they become your habits. Habits, they could be bad or good. So, and then habits, well, they could become habits because you just get used to doing them over and over again. And then, they watch your habits, they become your character. The habits could become your character in a way that, well, they could become your character that, or because, or just how. Because since you just do your habits or you don't think about your habits, they might just become who you are.

Okay, and go ahead.

And then watch your character become your destiny. That might be pretty true because watch your character, it probably will develop a little more like after you've done all your habits and things like that. It becomes your destiny. That means like in the future, maybe your character, it'll it becomes your destiny, like your character brings bad things or good things to you just depending on what your habits are and what your character is.

So do you believe all the way from thoughts down to what happens to you in the future that all these— it's sort of like a chain, that all of these chains work together?

I think so, because I think it makes sense.

Okay, I actually have to go, so I'm glad we got through this quickly. And maybe next time I'll, I'll see what you guys think about it. Okay, so thanks to you both. We'll see you next week. Bye-bye.