Overcoming the Six Ghosts of Fear (& What's Gratitude Got to Do with it)

Alright guys, today is Wednesday and I'm going to break down the 6 ghosts of fear and how to overcome them. Because guess what? We all get attacked with fear. And there's 6 different fears that Napoleon Hill broke down in his classic Think and Grow Rich. And when you think about fear and its sabotaging effects, there's probably no more destructive force in the world in world history than fear. How many decisions are made out of fear? How many moments and trials and anxieties and health effects are caused by fear? You know, where there's an old saying, fear is false evidence appearing real, or another saying that F everything and run. It's the other acronym for fear. But guess what? We all get pummeled with fear at one point or another. And, uh, people that master fear and use fear as a leverage— you know, fear can be a massive leverage tool for you. And so we're going to break that down. But first, I want to break down the 6 ghosts of fear. And for you watching live or watching on the replay, comment below for fears that you're overcoming, because part of overcoming a fear is acknowledging the fear. And the more you acknowledge it, the more you you, you, uh, just notice it, but also notice it in a way that, hey, I see you and you're not going to control me. That's the spirit of noticing, not like overwhelming and being consumed with it. Okay, so almost seeing it as an objective, watching, observing. You're an observer, observer of the fear. Okay, so here are the 6 fears. Fear of poverty, that's a big one, especially in uncertain economic times. Like we've been in since like February of last year. Second, fear of criticism. How many times have you been held back by fear of criticism or fear of praise? Sometimes some of us, in terms of an identity shift, hey, that fear of praise could actually scare us, right? The third one, fear of poor health. Look at, look at today's crazy world, right? I mean, we've battled with that. My wife is pregnant, right? There's certain things of, hey, Hey, if she gets pregnant, she's, I mean, not if she is pregnant, but if she got coronavirus or had health effects, man, there's bigger repercussions. So we battle with that. Fourth, fear of loss of love. Ooh, ooh, ooh, who doesn't fear loss of love? The fifth one, fear of old age and death. Man, that, I tell you what, I've been taking wrinkle cream on my eyes since I was like 31. I'm 41 now, so that's helped me stay young. But man, I don't like getting older. I don't know about you guys, male or female, getting older is not fun. But actually, here's another crazy thing though. Between age 40 and age 60 is your most prosperous, productive work. Like most people never accomplish anything meaningful before they're 40. Now obviously there's some outliers. You know, I have friends like Colin Wayne. He really started building his business in the late '20s and is crushing it. Obviously tech world, a lot of other things, a lot of other friends have built epic brands, businesses, platforms before then, and that's wonderful. So I'm curious, as you're watching this, I'd love to know what your fears are, what fears you're overcoming, and, and what you're doing to battle through those, because I'm learning from this as well. Okay, so the sixth and final fear that I think is central to the human experience is the fear of not enough. How many of you guys feel like, uh, sometimes I'm not enough? I'm not smart enough. I'm not good-looking enough. I'm not thin enough. I'm not big enough. I'm not strong enough. I'm not smart enough. I'm not experienced enough. I'm not enough. I'm not educated enough. I'm not— I'm too old, too young, blah blah blah. There's all these fears around being not enough. So how do we overcome Fear in general. Let's break that down, um, because I battled through certain moments of fear where I dreaded getting up in the morning because I had so many problems to deal with. They were not fun seasons, uh, or that was not a fun season. But, um, first one, you gotta acknowledge it. And here's what I mean by that, all right? Um, clearly, you know, if you become consumed with the fear that that debilitates you, that handcuffs you, that just puts you in a corner or in a closet of hiding, playing small, all that. But acknowledging it, acknowledging your fear is like, I see you, and even naming it, like Scared Sally. Hey, Scared Sally, I see you. It actually creates a separation, a cognitive separation, so that you can make decisions in spite of that fear. So, Scared Sally, I see you. All right? And then name, when you name Scared Sally, and you say, hey, I appreciate you, and ask Scared Sally, like even see yourself having a conversation with Scared Sally. What is the gift you're trying to bring to my life, Miss Scared Sally? Or, you know, Nervous Nigel, whatever it might be. What is the gift? All right, and then when you see that gift, And you hear that gift and you feel it. Think Scared Sally, think Nervous Nigel, and say, hey, I hear you, I see you, thank you for sharing your fear. I receive it in the sense of I understand it. Now, um, here's what you do. Then you can do a visualization. I do it in my Claim Your Power NLP process that clients pay me, you know, $1,000 for a single one-on-one session, or, um, you know, have it on my YouTube channel for free. You guys can watch it. Epically powerful, right? I've literally led about 500 entrepreneurs through this and have had people release stories of rape, release stories of loss of a loved one, release money traumas and stories. But when you think that part of you and then you go to a bus, like see yourself on it, on the bus of your life with that fear, with nervous Nigel, And you say, nervous Nigel, I know you've been driving the bus of my life. But right now, it's time for someone else to take the reins. So you ask nervous Nigel to hand over the keys to you and ask nervous Nigel or scared Sally to go to the back of the bus and thank them and see them doing that, see them receiving that command. And then you anchor into the next part of the claim your power is identifying, hey, who's your more powerful magnetic self, anchor into that part of you, invite that part of you to come to the front of the bus and to drive the bus of your life. Now I have a whole 32-minute meditation on it that is epic. You want to do that. It's much more complete. I'm breaking it down in 30 seconds. All right. But then you invite that part of you to lead and drive the bus of your life. Guess what? You've literally made a cognitive decision and command and agreement and attach meaning in your life and in the meaning of the fear, you've made an agreement and sent that part of you to the back of the bus. By that whole visualization, by that whole decision, now you are free. You're much more free. And I've seen people actually literally feel the weight lift off their shoulders in the midst of that, okay? So a big part of releasing fear is acknowledging that fear. And then thinking that fear, and then inviting that fear to take a back seat. Another cool story I heard is, um, I don't remember which book I read it in, but this person that used to struggle with worry, um, they, they decided, hey, I'm gonna worry about my fears and anxieties and worries and all those things. Um, dude, love that, Christian. Thanks, my friend. Uh, glad you're enjoying the meditation. It shifts, doesn't it? Yeah, I'm getting people that are doing my meditation almost every freaking day, like Christian over here, and shifting things. Christian, I love— shoot me a DM, by the way, if you want. I would love to know how it's shifting you as well. But here's what happens when you shift some of those cognitive stories and dissonance around your fear. Now you're free. You have like literally handcuffed You unshackled and released the handcuffs around your fear, and now you're able to run free. You're able to move more powerfully. You're able, you're able to bring a different dimension of you. So now I want to break into each of the 6 for a few minutes before I wrap up. First, fear of poverty. Okay, so quick antidote, dramatic transformative antidote to the fear of poverty. Is to shift into gratitude. So here's how you shift in gratitude. I'm reading this book that I read last, uh, last year when I was just working on my consciousness mindset. It's called The Magic. It's the sequel to The Secret, and it has 3 main things on how to write out your gratitude list that I thought were really, really great. And I did some of them this morning, and dude, I went from feeling like kind of stressed. I'm just overwhelmed, like my schedule is packed this week and got so many things I want to do, and I'm working on deleting some things and all that anyway. But I wrote these things out. I am truly blessed to have blank, and I just wrote out thing after thing after thing. And then I'm so happy and grateful for blank, wrote out a bunch of different things. Third, I'm truly grateful for blank, wrote out a bunch of things and people as well. With all my heart, thank you for blank. And it also adds because blank, right? You can add that part. But I just did the gratitude part. I'm truly blessed to have, so grateful. And man, my demeanor and my spirit lifted. And soon enough, I was literally in tears just sitting outside. And then I sent, I was like, you know what, I'm going to send about 10, 15 different text messages to people. And express gratitude for their life. And I've gotten some beautiful texts back, and it just shifts your energy and your aura. Um, but when you make an inventory of what you actually have, it shifts you from fear of poverty to like, hey, I'm actually abundant. Like, look around, you know, simple things. I've got friends, I've got a mom that loved me well, I've got a great wife, I've got good food, I've got I've got plentiful oxygen, clean oxygen. I've got clean water. Like, I've got a beautiful luxury car that I love, right? Like those little things. I've got amazing clients from around the world. And you just start writing out certain things. I've got amazing talent. I've experienced this. I've learned this. I've got a great access to— we're in the most abundant time in human history in so many regards, right? So, it shifts you. Even people in poverty today, people that are middle class today would be considered in poverty about 100 years ago based on the number of clothes, the house, the things like that. Like 100 years ago, if you look at the size of the closets versus the size of closets today, man, we have an abundance. Poverty has gone down, right? But we have to train our mind to look for the good that's happening. That's why gratitude is so epic, guys. Second one, fear of criticism. All right, that's going to happen. But what if, what if we reinterpret it again? We're meaning-making machines. What if when I receive criticism, I flip it? And like, hey, I've had some, a handful of like real haters, not many. I probably need to be more controversial to get a few more. I don't know if you've had any fear of criticism. Love to know if you guys have any fear of criticism that's been hitting you. But to shift the fear of criticism, you shift from being, hey, you know what? Yeah, there are some people who are going to say some mean stuff about me. So what? You know, that's really a reflection of the poison in their own heart. When people are highly critical of others, it's usually a reflection of their own poison. But again, use it as gratitude. And I even, at one point earlier this year, I had on my whiteboard in my office, the people, the doubters, the critics, and I used it as fuel, kind of like Michael Jordan. I was like, hey, whoop. Instead of allowing me to, and allowing me to like be negatively fueled, I'm like, I'm gonna use their criticism as positive fuel. I'm going to use it to lift up. Because here's the deal, you need resistance. Think of yourself as a Boeing 737. Boeing 737, guess how many tons that sucker weighs? 485 tons. Guess what? To lift in the night sky, that's a lot of tonnage. Uh, big heavy bird, right? So you— it needs to face resistance. It needs to face a lot of resistance. So if it faces only a little bit of resistance, it's only just gonna go— it's not gonna lift up. It needs a lot of freaking resistance. So, um, criticism— what if criticism became part of your fuel? You know, like I've heard, um, for viral video posts and viral, uh, social media, it often needs to be controversial enough to actually get traction. The critics and the haters— I was here in a Clubhouse room— the haters are the ones that help make it viral because it's controversial and galvanizes interest. So embrace it is my thought. What if you could embrace and this question, flipping the question, what if I can, any fear you have, what if it's a gift? What if it could help me? What if I could use it as a fuel, right? So that's how I deal with criticism. And then, And then it's also learning and it's feedback too. Number 3, fear of poor health. You know what? Facing it, just again, flipping it. What if I'm actually really healthy? What if I'm, even if you're battling some health conditions, what if I am healing? What if I am making progress? What if there are more supplements and nutrition and wisdom than we've ever thought possible? And what if all I need is around me to get healthier? And, you know, we, we're living in a time— yes, we have a pandemic, but it's settling down, it's, it's calming down, a lot of shifts are happening. All right, so what if we reframed it? Fourth one, fear of loss of love. Hey, we've all— most of us, very few people have been through life without some loss of love. But what if the loss of love, even if you do lose the love, you lose attachment to this love, to this outcome, what if, um, never actually lost it? Because you carry memories and you carry a goodness. Take the gifts of those moments, of those relationships, friendships, whatever, and carry them into your future as a gift. What if it's not wasted? No matter what happens. And in fact, when we try and cling to love, we actually don't— we try and control love, we actually almost ensure that we're not going to get true love. We might have a relationship, that relationship might be stable, but love by its nature has freedom. And Anthony DeMello wrote this epic book called The Way to Love. It's short, but it's epic. Highly, highly recommend it. But what if, you know what, in all the— one of the things you can remind yourself of if you have fear of loss of love is that the world has billions of people. Guess what? We'll be okay. You'll be okay if something goes wrong. Okay, next one, fear of old age, dying. What if death is an upgrade? What if actually we get wiser as we grow older? And you look at real stories of people who have been to the afterlife and back and those type things, near-death experiences, experiences or died for a few minutes and came back, it's pretty consistent. There's a white light, there's things, there's peace, there's— often they see a godlike figure, right? Um, so what if it's an upgrade, right? And in reality, we don't know when our time is. We only can give our all to this very moment. Michael Jordan— I was watching The Last Dance lately again— he was so freaking present to the moment. That was one of his magic things that he had. And then number 6, fear of not enough. What if? What if I am enough? What if I'm more than enough? And then what you can do is literally, if you battle that fear, just literally take out a notebook, boom, take out a notebook and write down all the ways you are enough or all the resources you have that you haven't taken inventory of lately and inventory that. And you'll see, hey, I've actually got more than enough. So anyway, those are some gifts and how to reframe the 6 ghosts of fear. So let me know what else you guys would like to hear and share. And share this out, by the way, speaking of, share this out to someone that needs to battle, that's battling through fear and wants to make it to the other side. That's part of what I do in terms of mainly I coach and mentor to different groups of people, e-commerce entrepreneurs with my buddy Colin Wayne, and then secondly, expert-driven entrepreneurs that are building a brand based on expert knowledge, what's up here, what's in here, you know, their wisdom, their knowledge, their insight. And a big thing that we have to battle, you know, is overcoming the ghost of fear, myself included. You know, I've— I'm— this is the first year that I am really becoming public as a brand with two books coming out. And really speaking, teaching a lot more. And I'm, I'm sliding into that, but I'm— I have to battle through a lot of these fears as well. And, uh, and it's fun. So, um, and if, if I can help you guys any further, if you're interested in mastering your expert brand and stepping into that and, and building a prosperous expert pathway, let me know. Be glad to serve. Reach out to me. Otherwise, have a beautiful day. Share this out. And I also love to know what fears you're overcoming, how you're overcoming, and what aspects this was helpful. Christian, good to see you, my man, and many, many others watching, uh, live or in the replay, and we will talk soon.