5 Ways to Build a Resilient Business

Welcome to She's Crafted to Thrive. I'm your host, Nikita Williams, and this show is for all the ladies who are making and creating things that they love. You will hear conversations about the real everyday struggles of juggling life and business while trying to maintain passion and harmony. As women, we have the skill of getting things done, but sometimes we get in our own way. It's here where you'll see that you're not alone. You'll discover that success does not mean perfection. Fear and negative thoughts Thoughts and challenges are all a part of the journey. And on this podcast, you'll find the inspiration and tools you need to have a life and business that thrives. I am so excited that you're here, and I also feel like I owe you guys another explanation as to why you are just now getting another episode. Okay, so first and foremost, You guys know I'm all about doing what you can when you can, giving yourself grace and pausing every now and then if you need to so that you don't feel like you have to quit in the long term or in the, you know, whatever term. So I want to tell you, that's what I've been doing with the podcast. I have a lot going on, but you guys know I love showing up here on the podcast and sharing you what's going on in my business and interviewing different women and sharing my own personal story along the way. And, um, that's all fine and good and I love it. However, life is busy right now. I'm in the middle of doing a course to become a practitioner and a specialist in aromatherapy and essential oils. Well, essential oils and then practitioner of aromatherapy, they're kind of one in the same but not really. There's a little bit of a difference. But anyway, the point is that takes a lot of my time. I'm developing and implementing and kind of like re-formulating my framework as I work with my clients as a business mindset coach. And so that's taking a little bit of brain power. Um, I also have an amazing membership, if you guys are not aware of that. You know, I have new ladies joining us all the time, so it's really finding the, the harmony and doing all of these things, right? And then on top of that, on top of that, I have multiple chronic illnesses. And I think that one of the things that I shared with you guys before, like earlier last year, around the same time this year, you know, it's so crazy when I think about 2020, it's like, it's still here, but it's not still here. It's like a weird paradox paradigm. But anyway, last year I got diagnosed with a new, well, two new chronic illnesses and one that I've always suspected that I have, which is chronic bladder pain, which is IC, or there's a whole bunch of words for it, but basically it just means chronic bladder pain. I mean, you're not supposed to fill your bladder unless you have to go to the bathroom, right? For me, I feel it pretty much all the time, and it gets flared up, and it flares everything else up with the endometriosis and all the other things that I've got going on. And it's one of those things where up into this point I've kind of had Well, up until last year at this point, I've had different times in my life where I kind of know how my body responds, but this is a very different thing and it's a little bit— it's like at the very beginning when you finally have a diagnosis for something you knew you had all along, but you really weren't sure. So you thought it was something else and now it's trying to figure out the different things that work and don't work for your body as far as diet and as far as stress and all of the things that contribute to a flare-up when you have a chronic illness. And so this past year has been me playing, you know, the catch-up game with my body because one chronic illness can definitely affect another. And even though I have found a lot of really amazing modalities to help me manage my pain and stress and anxiety and all of that jazz, there's still lots to be learned, to say the least. So this past couple of months has been quite difficult because I haven't found that, you know, great harmony and balance within this new chronic illness. So that all to be said, I have kind of slowed down. I've kind of missed a couple episodes. But I want you guys to know, and I'm sharing this in full disclosure and transparency because I do truly believe that we need to have these conversations more. We need to share these parts of our journeys way more than we actually hear people share them. And the reason why I believe this to be true and have seen how me being around other women who openly and freely share these ups and downs and flows and detours and pauses in their journey, it has given me the permission in a lot of ways to accept that, you know what, it's so much better to ride the wave of these ups and downs than to let them drown me. And I want everyone else to feel the same way. I want everyone, everyone else that's listening to the episode to feel like, you know what, Nikita does her best in being consistent. And is it Perfect. No, there's no such thing as perfection. And if she can do this and continue to go and I can give her some compassion, which I hope that you're doing, and empathy, I hope that you're doing, then I can do that for myself. Why can't I do that for myself? And so that's what is kind of at the pinnacle of this episode. I am talking about how to find resilience when you are building a business and you are living with a chronic or multiple chronic illnesses. So one of the first things I kind of already shared with you, but I will kind of give you just one-offs, like I'll just list them all and then I'll go into them a little bit more. The first thing would be finding perspective. This is finding perspective. All of these things are a list of things that helps you build resilience in living with a chronic illness, multiple chronic illnesses, and on top of that, in life and especially in business. So perspective, learning from others, being patient, finding gratitude, or cultivating gratitude. It's like finding and cultivating gratitude, really, and choosing contentment. So those are the things that I want to talk to you guys a little bit about, about how you can build a really strong root system, if you will, in resilience. And, you know, one of the things I have found that people have asked me in the past is like, how, how are you doing this? And I'm like, well, one, I'm not doing it alone. I know that I have faith and I have, you know, support systems. I know that I'm not doing this in my own strength or my power. Totally not even possible. But I also recognize that living this life that I have been for over 2 decades and going— yeah, let's say we go there— over the last 2 decades, that giving up is not an option. Choosing not to see the good is not an option. Have there been parts of my journey where I definitely felt that way, where I definitely felt that felt, man, this is impossible and I'm not going to make it. Are there moments in my journey where I have felt that I wish it would just all end? Yes. But ultimately, I have always had faith and had an inside joy and hope for that. All of this that I'm dealing with is just temporary. And what's happening today or what's happening in this one moment or any one moment where the pain feels feels impossible or the stress feels impossible, that it is temporary. Like, it's just temporary. And so that's why perspective is probably the number one key to helping us build resilience when we're living with all of these challenges. If we're able to learn to see the difference between big problems and then small problems, it's so much easier to cope with both of those scenarios. Right. And it's one of those things that, you know, when you live with a chronic illness, we tend sometimes to live in the extremes of thinking in a negative way. And so for me, back in the day, and I can't say sometimes I still have these moments, like my husband would be like, honey, it's not really like that all the time, is it? And I'm like, you know what? You're right. Perspective. It's so great to have an accountability partner or friend or someone that's really close that can bring perspective to your situation even more so. But it's even more powerful when you're able to see it for yourself. But there are things we can pay attention to and recognize that not all of the things that we're going through are so huge or always so big, right? And one of those ways I like to think about that is in our business as a chronic illness person or as a chronic illness Warrior, that we tend to give our pain more power in the everyday moments when we actually have the power to do more, right? So it's really what, what happens is a lot to do with fear. A lot— our body is remembering pain from before, so it can hinder us from stepping into doing more or seeing a situation in a different light. So this is a really great time when we're thinking about building resilience to think and create an opportunity for you to see a different and more completely holistic point of view perspective. So one way I like to do that is journaling. Like, all of these different things are really great way to incorporate into journaling. But every day, you know, people talk about— and I'm going to talk about this too— but we talk about having a gratitude journal and a joy journal or a just a regular journal. But I also feel like having a perspective journal might be a thing, right? Like when we feel this one way, what is it a way that we saw differently that helped us branch out and helped us to, you know, find that hope and joy to continue on. I think that's all wrapped in gratitude, but I think it's also really powerful when we can acknowledge the not so great perspective. And it can be something that can trigger us in the future to think, you know what, I thought that before about this scenario, I've gone to this negative extreme and what has helped me before in the past is, so think about it this way. So that's something that could be helpful. I have found in my own journey with things, I tend to look back often on like, man, I used to think like that and that didn't really serve me. So what did I do differently? How can I look at this differently? What did I do then? Um, you know, all those different kinds of things. So that's a really great way to help you with perspective. Another way is to learn from others. You know, I have to say, for me, this is probably beyond creating gratitude and finding patience. Like, all of these are really good, you guys, but learning from others has been a huge shift for me. I have so many women that I know that live with what I live with. It looks different for them, right? Because nobody is exactly the same and deal with chronic pain the same way. But I have found that them being brave and courageous to share their perspectives, their gratitude, their patience has helped me to see my own situation, my own life in a different light. It's really given me another perspective, right? But it's also helped me to recognize that even through the difficult times, that they go through, they're still here and they're showing encouragement. And if they can do it, I can do it too. So learning from others also, I believe, gives us the permission to step into being okay with owning and feeling the emotions and knowing that me too, I'm not alone. You know, I'm not alone in this. And that is a powerful shift. Especially when you are living with something that's invisible. Nobody can see. You're walking around, everyone's like, but you're so young and you look so great. And nobody knows that you were like just the other night in the hospital for hours or in the bathroom for hours or clinging to the edge of the bed in pain and praying in tears. Nobody can see that, right? No physical person can see that.. But knowing that there are other women who share those pieces of them with you is a great way to learn. And the other thing about learning from others is that sometimes those people— and I specifically talk about women because my crew is women, it's women who are in my corner that I lean on beyond my husband, beyond, you know, my, my Heavenly Father also— I definitely lean on women and those women who are brave enough and courageous enough to share their journey and story has shared things that has helped them that I never even would have thought of for myself that has now shifted my world completely, like absolutely completely shifted it. And it's given me a completely different perspective than I ever would have thought had I never had, you know, reached out or opened myself to learn from others. Okay, so the third one is to be patient. Being patient is really hard. Like, it's one of those things that when you're living with a chronic illness, I feel like it's just one of those really hard things to be patient with ourselves, with the process of healing, with the process of learning, with the process of finding your sweet spot. I'm going to go back to my own personal journey right now with chronic— with the IC, my new diagnosis. I feel like I'm going backwards. I know I'm not. Like, I literally know I'm not. I'm way more equipped now than I have ever been to deal with a new chronic illness diagnosis. But it feels like, man, why is this taking Nikita so long to figure out what is going to work for her? What is not good for her? I should be like down, like I should have this down to a science of what works for me and what doesn't work for me. But this is a new thing and I need to give myself the grace and the patience to recognize, you know, what, it's going to take me time. It took me years to find my rhythm with all the other things, literally years. So it's— I should come and I need to embrace that idea of patience. And that correlates so well with the rest of our life, especially in business. You know, so many of my clients I talk to, some of them are in the first 1 to 3 years of their business or others are beyond that. And they're looking at other people's journey and comparing it. And it's like, but your journey is different and your path of hurdles and challenges look completely different. So to gauge whether or not you're going fast enough or improving fast enough or whatever the measuring stick is, it's honestly kind of like a lack of Showing yourself some patience, like being patient in this moment. It takes time. So that's something that we can apply, like all the 3 things I've mentioned so far. So learning from others, we can do that and help us in our journey and finding resilience even more so, right? By being with a community, leaning on those people, learning from them. That applies to business, that applies to life, that applies to everything. As well as, as I mentioned before, perspective. It's the same thing in our business. If we look at the bigger picture, if we shift our, our focus on what we have and what we have accomplished versus what we haven't, it really does help us step into a more creative flow and power of doing what we love and getting to where we want to go with success. So those are the 3— those are 3 things. So the other 2 is cultivating gratitude and choosing contentment. These 2 kind of go hand in hand, honestly. Gratitude is even in the hard stuff. You know, one of the biggest, like, hardest but yet so thankful for is that even sometimes in my hardest moment in life, I have found— I have forced myself to find reasons why I'm grateful, whether it's that I'm learning something about myself, and I'm really grateful for that, whether it's for being able to endure and persevere. I'm really thankful for that. Whether it's just the fact that I woke up today. I can't tell you how many times, and I can say this without getting all choked up, but my husband, when I say this, I say this to him, he always gives me that face of like, I can't believe that. I can't tell you how many times I've gone to bed in so much pain that I'm crying and praying for peace of mind that if I don't wake up in the morning, that I will see my loved ones soon. Like, that's a real thing. Like, I'm not saying that to get you all choked up, but I'm just being real. But I feel like I've gotten to those points in my life and in those moments because I've been able to look back and be like, yeah, Even if today is the last day, here is what I'm grateful for. I'm grateful for these relationships. I'm grateful for the experiences and the things that I've done despite living with this pain. I'm so grateful for those things, right? And so gratitude is a great neutralizer. I can't— let me say that gratitude is a great neutralizer to negativity, to no hope. It actually creates positivity, it creates hope, it creates a stronger rooted resilience system. And gratitude is not like, you know, oh, I'm so happy. It's like really being in that moment of thanks, of appreciation for what we do have, what we have accomplished, where we have come from, who is in our world, all of the things, even when things are sucky, like even when things are as the worst that they can be. One of the things that I'm always grateful for is that back in the day when I used to go to the hospital, it was— it felt really stressful. But one of the things I always look forward to, which is crazy that you can say that I'm like smiling right now, is that when we do go to the hospital, it is like a war. Like I put on my war mind getting ready to the hospital. But the other thing that I can almost guarantee is that with my husband there, 9 times out of 10, I can find something to laugh about. I can— we can joke, we can laugh. Half the times when we do go, the nurses are like, you guys are having too much fun in here. Even though I'm in crazy pain and maybe had, you know, some Dilaudid or morphine, I'm still— and it's even before that, but even definitely After that, I'm definitely like super laughy. Um, but there's a peace to me that comes, and I do, I do give that completely, you know, that to my, my Heavenly Father. But I also do think it comes from just being grateful that, hey, one, I'm able to get to the hospital. Two, I'm not here alone physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually. I'm never ever alone. And that laughter is a great medicine to deal with really tough things. I'm grateful for that. And I honestly can say I hadn't always been that kind of person. My husband has definitely brought that out of me. I'm a little goofier. I, I do little goofier things. And all of that came out of, you know, seeing and dealing and being in pain and going through the really rough stuff and still being able to laugh. That is something I will always forever be grateful for. So for you, find that thing, whether it's in business, whether it's in living with a chronic illness, something that you can always grab or grasp onto that you feel so forever grateful for. But every day, find something that you can say that you're grateful for. At least one. I always try to do three, but at least one thing. The last one is to choose contentment. Contentment is learning that you don't have the control of all of the things. You can only do what you can do, and the rest you have to leave to be what it is. And I can say, back in 2017, I think I came to that point with living with multiple chronic illnesses. There's a peace that comes with contentment. It's not that you're, you're, um, it's not that you're giving up. It's not that you have, um, yeah, it's not that you've given up. It's that you've accepted what is happening. You're always looking for, you know, potential ways for it to get better, but you're not living in La La Land. You are, you are content. You have understood that this is what your lot is in life. If things changes, great. If things don't change as far as what's going on with you, you can still find love, peace, joy, gratitude, friends, all of those things, and still live a really great life. And hope, right? And so contentment allows you to see beyond your situation but also recognize it at the same time. It's one of those like weird paradox but works really well to give up the idea of having control over all of the things. We don't. We have control of a lot of things, that's true. What we feel, how we feel, how we respond, um, the things we put in our mouth, the things that we say, all of the things, right? But waking up one day with a new chronic illness or pain, you didn't have too much control over that. Some of us are walking around fine, and then the next thing we know, we are dealing with things. I mean, case in point, COVID-19. We have no control over that. So it's really important to find contentment while dealing with the things so that you can still find and continue to find the positive, abundant things in life that adds to resilience. This is a huge part of accepting and thriving as a warrior in life, whatever that looks like for you. And so resilience is cultivated and grown through contentment, gratitude, being patient, being and learning from others, and having a really great perspective on our problems. So I hope that this was helpful, and I hope that you found this encouraging, um, and I hope that you can apply it to not just, you know, living with a chronic illness, but life and business in general. I think all of these things definitely have have a huge direct correlation to every aspect of our life in our business. So by the way, I wanted to say thank you to all my listeners that have been loyal for years, because now I can— like, it's been years. Um, and I want to say thank you to all the new ones who are here as well. We have reached 10K, over 10K downloads. Hey, I'm so excited! You guys don't even know, like, I'm filled with so much joy when I see that number. I know it's going to continue to grow. I started this just to connect with women while I was going through one of the most difficult times in my chronic illness journey and as a business owner, and it's continuing to grow. And I just want to say thank you. If you would like to take this from the airways to in person in a Zoom or on a one-on-one call with me, I would love to have you join me inside of my membership. You can go to sheescrafted.com to learn more about that. Or if you're looking for a mindset coach that's willing to and understands what it's like to build a business while living with multiple chronic illnesses, I'm your girl. I really help you to tap into what you want, what you need, and how to get to where you want to go so you can build a more sustainable and profitable business. I can say for the most part, my clients who are in my one-on-one coaching program they, within the— in that 6-month period, many of them double their income. And that's because of them really working with knowledge of themselves and their business and their ideal clients. And we're really working along the way together to build that sustainability so that they don't give up. They can give them the self— they can give themselves the space they need to take care of them and their families while still doing that in a way that feels good and holistic and healthy. So anyway, I of course love to end every episode. Oh, by the way, also the other thing I forgot to tell you, I am going to be doing episodes every other week for the most part. There might be some months where it's like, you're just going to get one episode from me until September, until like October timeframe. Um, just because of how life is ending. So like how life is going, I should say. So be sure to just stay tuned. Um, every other week we'll have 2 episodes for the most part. Every month there is one month that we'll probably only have one episode just because of the time of the year. Um, but I just want to say thank you. And yes, remember that you beautiful souls, you are crafted to thrive. You have been designed. You just have to tap into it. And do it on purpose. All right, have a great day!