How to Build Lasting Client Relationships for Business Success with Laura Myer

Hello y'all, I'm so excited for you to meet and hear my conversation with Laura Meyer, who is an amazing woman, mom, entrepreneur, and fellow endometriosis warrior. We kind of get into that a little bit, but most importantly, I want you to know that Laura and I had this conversation about a year ago, and I was inside of a community called The Advance Network, which was an online networking group where we kind of gotten together and masterminded and helped each other to grow in our businesses. And since then, Lara has gone to sell that business and move on to more better and more aligned things. So I want to share with you that we kind of mentioned that throughout this episode, but what you want to stay around for absolutely in this episode, in this conversation, is her powerful way of relationship marketing. She has been in business for over 20 years. She has sold multiple businesses online and offline, and she has thrived in all of that through her ability to create connection with her community and with those who are in her network. She's been able to grow and expound on that She's also a bestselling author of the Win Win Win book, which is all about what we're going to be talking about today, relationship marketing. She's also the host of the Next Level Leap podcast, and she currently right now is helping those who are wanting to move into consulting, move their profession from doing what they're doing, maybe in the corporate space, into a more consulting avenue, as well as helping those who want to use AI and emotional intelligence marketing as a force for good, using her 4-step system, LEAP, and framework to help them create more revenue in their business without overwhelming their current business model right now. So all of that to say, I'm so excited about this conversation because Laura and I talk about how important it is that even though we have all of these tools right now, we have AI now, we have always had, like, we've had social media for years now, but she shares her journey from having a franchise wedding photography and portrait studio business to then moving into consulting, to then transitioning into the work that she's doing now. And we talk a little bit more about how all of that came about and how she was able to move through all of that while giving herself space. Face and how relationship marketing is a sustainable business model. Y'all, this is a woman who is multi-talented and is amazing at what she does, and I was so honored that she said yes to being on the show. I will also put in the show notes a link to my conversation with her on her podcast, but it was so good. So anyway, if you're looking for a way to grow your business long term over multiple different changes in your business, like we think oftentimes as business owners that we have to stay in one lane. You are able to evolve and learn and grow as a person and as a business. And a lot of times this is done even easier in your business as a business model when you intentionally implement relationship marketing. And this is what we kind of talk about very uniquely in this episode, and as well as some of our kind of mindset on how we run our businesses as people who have lived and are living with different health challenges and other things that are going on in our lives personally. So this is probably different than you've heard Laura before. If you've listened to any of her episodes with other guests, I kind of go a little bit personal and she shares a bit, and I'm so honored that she felt safe to do that in the space. So stay tuned. If you're ready to learn how to harness the power of relationship marketing in your business, no matter the season.

Welcome to Crafted to Thrive, the globally ranked podcast for entrepreneurs living with chronic illness. I'm your host, Nikita Williams, and after being diagnosed with multiple chronic illnesses myself, I figured out the surprisingly simple missing links to growing a profitable business without compromising my health. Since then, I I've helped dozens of women just like you learn how to do the same. If you're ready to own your story and create a thriving business that aligns with your health and wellbeing, you're in the right place. Together, we're shifting the narrative of what's possible for entrepreneurs with chronic illness. This is Crafted to Thrive.

I am so excited to have Laura on the show. I have been in her community and her world, and it has been such a fun delight.

Can't wait for you guys to listen to more of her story and how she got started.

But welcome, Laura.

Thank you so much for having me. It's so nice to be here. I always love spending time with you, and I really appreciate it.

Yeah, I love the community part of what you've built. Bringing other women together in the Advance has just been so much fun. I've met some amazing women besides you. Like, it's been really great. So please tell us a little bit about who you are, where you're from, what you do.

Yeah, so I'm the co-founder of the Advanced Women's Expert Network with, with Kelly Roach, which is what you just referred to. And then I have 3 kids under 10, one of which brought me a little bit of a cold home from preschool. So excuse my voice. And I live in Southeast Pennsylvania, um, married and we have a just a beautiful life here and play tennis. Pretty regularly to a point of what might people might call an addiction. I have the worst behaved puppy in my neighborhood and who hopefully does not make an appearance on this, on this audio and video. And I have a— I'm a consultant in addition to being the co-founder of The Advance. So I have a very robust and busy consulting company and it's on its way to hitting 7 figures just by itself, that company. I also have a consulting certification program and Mastermind. So when I'm not in the Advance and playing, wearing that hat, it's mainly in the consulting, business consulting space.

Yeah, and I've learned so much personally just from some of the trainings that you've done in the Advance, which is another perk of being a part of the Advance, is learning from your experience has been really nice. What has led you to being like a consultant, having this multiple businesses? I love this story because I've heard it before, but I, I can't wait for you to share. How did you start entrepreneur journey?

Yeah, so I've been an entrepreneur for 20 years, which is crazy to say out loud, but I started my first business a couple years out of college and was a wedding photographer for the first 10 years of my entrepreneurial career. Then I started one children's portrait studio, then another, and somebody came to me and said, you should probably franchise your children's portrait studios. And I was like, okay, so I franchised my children's portrait studios. And grew it to about 12 locations. And then just about 4 and a half years ago, I noticed that the industry had shifted quite a bit, that the photo industry had changed. The way in which people were perceiving photography and the value of photography had shifted significantly. And I noticed that our, our revenue was decreasing despite the fact that we were increasing our marketing significantly. And I kind of saw the writing on the wall. And I made a very difficult decision to release my franchisees and the license agreements, shut down my company on locations, and kind of hit the reset button. I had just turned 40. Who I thought was going to be my last and youngest child was going into kindergarten. And I was just really at this sort of like, I don't even say midlife crisis, but I was, I was really struggling with knowing what to do next. And at the time, I just was like, my biggest concern was just winding things down well, making sure customers got refunds, making sure that my employees were placed in new jobs and roles, and that, you know, I finished strong on that stage in my career. But afterwards, I was just, you know, taking some time, and I started texting some of the people in my network and in my relationships and people I was connected to, other CEOs, and And I texted a group that I was pretty friendly with and I said, you know, I just wanna let you know, I decided to close down my studio operation. Thank you so much for being an inspiration to me. And I just wanna let you know that about the decision I've made. And one by one they came back and said, my gosh, Laura, I'm so sorry. I know how hard you've worked on that business. And when you're ready, I was wondering if you could fly to our corporate headquarters and train our marketing department on what I saw you do in your company applications when it comes to email marketing. And I was wondering, if you would be willing to host a 2-day brand positioning workshop for our company, because I'm worried that our brand position is slipping, and I've heard you talk about that before, and it seems like you really have a pulse on what's going on in the industry. And one by one, they started hiring me in consulting. And at the time, I was getting into online entrepreneurship, and I was like, I'm gonna start a membership, I'm gonna have courses. And now I have those info products, but I really was dismissing consulting. I thought that consulting was the thing that I was going to do that would be sort of a temporary landing spot until I got to my next endeavor. And what I realized is consulting was the next endeavor. Consulting is so awesome. It's very lucrative. It gives you a lot of time freedom. It's strategic. It uses your brain. You get to work with, you know, really cool companies and helping them grow their mission and their impact. And I just fell in love with consulting. And over The years, you know, partnered with Kelly, started the Advance. People started asking me how to become a consultant, start a certification program. But ultimately it was that like pivotal moment where I didn't know what I was gonna do next that I think a lot of people are afraid of. And I was too. I mean, I'll tell you, I was petrified. I had been defined by entrepreneurship for most of my life, adult life. Yeah. And it was a huge part of my identity and I felt loss and a grieving and no longer being— feeling like I could see myself as an entrepreneur, that I would no longer be one. But ultimately, this is what I found out for anybody who's going through something like that, is that the next thing doesn't show up until you make space for it, right? Right. It just doesn't. The next thing doesn't show up until you make stay space for it. As I like to say, the miracles are in the margins. Like you have to create margin to know for— in, you know, my case, I'm a faith-based person— for God to show you what's next. And I think you have to take that leap of faith in knowing that whatever is happening right now is— if it's— if you feel called that it's no longer for you, it's like it's creating the space for something new to show up. So you don't feel rushed, you don't feel stressed, and the right thing appears.

Yeah, I really love that you brought that out because you're so right. So many people are afraid of space. Like, I feel like the whole world, especially right now in entrepreneurship, everyone's— a lot of people are running away from space. They're like, I can't have space because they're afraid, right? And I love that you're saying, well, that's probably the thing you need to see what's on the other side.

Yes.

Yeah.

So powerful.

So do you feel like during that space, like, did other things become very clear for you? Like the your values, things that like kind of have shifted through that space, that margin of like, okay, what, what am I gonna do now? What were some of the things that kind of shifted also beyond like, oh, this is a consulting road, but personally?

Yeah, I think so. That was such a huge time of growth for me.

Mm-hmm.

Like personal growth. I spent a lot of time and effort on my own self and it was the first time in my life I'd really done that. I mean, I'm a classic overachiever. High, you know, high entrepreneurial personality. And I know that left to my own devices, I will create goals and I'll drive hard at them. And it was really the first time that I had allowed myself to just be quiet, right, and hear my own voice and listen to my own intuition and sharpen those skills within myself. And it's funny, because even recently, things have started to get real busy again. And I realized I was missing that space in my life. And I need recreate it because I was, I wasn't growing. I wasn't growing personally in the way that I really wanted to. And I think what happens is, is that for many of us, entrepreneurship is such a big part of our identity. And when we can release that identity and really find out who we truly are. And again, as a faith-based person, I look at it as a child of God, but other people may have different perspectives on that. But when we find out who we are independent of our success or failures, they stop becoming, they stop driving our behavior. So when we, you know, for so many of us, we are petrified of failure and we're so defined by our successes. But what happens when none of that matters, right? Who are we? Well, we become kind of just separate from it, independent from it. Something's really successful and goes really well. You're like, great, that's fantastic. I like it, happy, right? But it doesn't, it doesn't define my success. It doesn't make me who I am. And a failure is just a learning experience. It doesn't define you either. And I think it, I think that experience allowed me to detach from some of the emotions or even kind of overworking addictions that I had prior to that experience.

I feel like some of the people who are listening to this episode that I know are listening are like, Laura is speaking my world right now. Like, I feel like they're going to feel so seen by that experience and that truth, right? Like, really, I know for myself personally, too, living with chronic illness, that can start to, like, become a definition of who I am versus a part of who I am. And it's like, but I'm so much— there's so much more things, right? And as an entrepreneur, definitely, if it's your only thing that you're doing, it's hard to see that there's a separation between what you do versus who you are.

Yes.

And I think that's beautiful that you are recreating that in your space right now of being like, I need my me time of what that really means for you.

Yes, absolutely. Yeah. And I think again, we can get so lost in entrepreneurship and we can get so lost in chasing fans, followers, and likes and social media or, all the comparison that honestly, when I was starting out in entrepreneurship, I— we didn't have.

Yeah.

Like we didn't have to think about those things. They didn't exist. And now I think just training ourselves to block it out and create our own path forward is something that I hear more— a lot of people talking about, particularly when it comes to relationships and relationship marketing, which I'm sure we'll, we'll get to next. But, um, that I think is, is kind of what was old is coming back again. And I really want to invite all of your listeners to consider whether or not those thoughts are beneficial, right? Like whether or not when we're looking at social media, the good and the, the worthiness and the, and the good enoughness, whether or not it's benefiting the entrepreneur or person that you want to be at to consider blocking it out.

Yeah, yeah, you're so right. That's a great question. Is it serving you right? Like, so good. I wanted to kind of go back, like we were talking about the relationship marketing. I just love the reason why I was so drawn to the Advance and then to Laura. I was like, this woman is living what I truly 100% believe, which is that relationships is what makes makes one, to me, like life in general just more fulfilling. And then two, it's what really stands out over everything in business. Like, it's just— it's kind of like, I feel like relationship marketing is like email. Like, email's never gonna not, in my opinion, not be right. So it's relationships. And if that's going to be in your business, like, if it's an intentional part of your business, how much more likely are you to find the success you're looking for? So How did that experience with like, I'm just texting my, my group of people to let them know like I'm changing things and then to be led into this path of consulting, how has that belief and like that networking and connecting, that social relationships with people really been a foundation and core to how you have grown in your business?

Yeah, I mean, so I have a pretty robust business. And don't run any paid traffic or ads or anything like that. Not that I'm against them. I think they're fantastic. And a lot of my clients, their businesses are built on that. But for me personally, relationship marketing is the number one traffic source for my entire, you know, very robust, you know, large-scale business. And so, you know, when I really look back on what has created that result in my business, it has been a dedication to relationships and a dedication to credibility building, a dedication to visibility that comes from genuine, authentic connection. And it's something that for those of us who are in business before social media, it was survival, right? Like, there was no social media. I like to think that I was in business when Zuckerberg was filling out his Harvard application.

Yeah.

Right. And so that's how we, that's how we survived as business owners. We got ourselves on lists. We were, you know, got ourselves referral partners and those relationships didn't happen overnight. And I think in this sort of fast-paced online world that we live in, there is very much a sense of wanting things to happen immediately. And wanting the growth to happen fast and wanting the, you know, the audience to show up quickly and wanting the leads to come in quickly. When it comes to relationship marketing and relationship building, the best relationships take place over time and they take place when they start from with credibility, right? And part of why we've even gotten into this podcast exchange is I've seen how you've shown up in the community. It's really built a ton of credibility with me. You know, I, I have helped you in various ways. It's built credibility with you, and that's why we're having a nice exchange right now. You can't manufacture that. And when you, when you have a genuine, authentic connection with people around you, that reputation builds, right? And your reputation, your relationships as a service-based business owner, probably your two biggest assets. And, and then as you start building up the credibility and that authority, then what takes place is that your community starts to form around you, right? People start to kind of gather around you. You start building an audience, even a small audience of dedicated fans because of that, the way in which you've grown your business. And I think that is for so many business owners, it's so much more sustainable than other methods that are popularized in online entrepreneurship, right? And it's just, it's a, it's a kind of what was pop, you know, what was old is coming back again. It's becoming new again. And I really hope that with my upcoming book release that people start considering relationship marketing as part of their, you know, daily routines, you know, as part of their daily habits that create the fuel to grow their business.

Yeah, I love what you said about like the— it's like, I call it like the— what's the OG? Is that what people say when they're talking about back in the day? It's like the OG of marketing Dating, like, it's true because even social media is actually from that idea. It's from that idea that relationships create this ability to connect truly, even though social media has completely taken that out of the context. I'm not against social media, guys, like, y'all know that, but it is definitely something that I think is missing from understanding that relationships, like you said, it takes time. And so posting something is so much different than actually speaking and being in someone's space and being concerned what's going on with them and being of service completely shifts that actual transaction of trust and, you know, credibility and authority and all of those different things that people are looking for in social media and a relationship. I 100% agree with you. I have always— but I probably was not in school when Zuckerberg was doing it, but I am like an old soul who believes that 100%.

Yes, I love that.

Yeah.

And I think it's not that social media or any other type of marketing is bad. I mean, right, I'm a marketer, so, you know, I like to see people with all their channels built out once they have a large-scale business. I like to make sure that they have SEO, that they have social, that they have paid, right? But it's more that when we use those tools to replace authentic connections. Yes. That's when we get in trouble. It's not that having them is, is a negative, right? It's that when we use them to replace the relationship building, that becomes a negative for our businesses because we end up really building something that is on a rocky foundation. Yeah.

Yeah.

I like to think, you know how people say websites are like your real estate online? Yeah. I feel like our relationships and our marketing like the relationship marketing is like our real estate for our business. Like, no one can take that away unless you choose to not keep your word. You like get, you know, do some things that like make your values not be very real to other people. So I definitely agree with you. It's a tool to leverage all the other ways that we grow our business if you're really using it the way it should be used, right?

Totally agree. Yeah.

So I want to ask something personal because when I first joined the community, we were talking about niching down, talking about your idea of what you do. And I was like, yeah, chronic illness is what I do. And you're like, yeah, but what does that mean? And I was like, I know, but I live with endometriosis. And it was something you were like, well, that I can agree. I can connect with you on because I know what that is. Because I've dealt with it. And something I talk about on the show is that no matter if it's endometriosis, fibromyalgia, cancer, whatever the case may be, it looks different for every person.

Yeah.

So I know that that's something you've dealt with in the past. Do you think that experience with endo has affected the way you run your business or how you show up in your life?

You know, it's such a good question. And for people who have struggled, I found out I had endometriosis when I was struggling with infertility. And that's probably when a lot of people find out. They just think it's normal. They think that really painful periods are normal. They think that, like, I really didn't know other people weren't in bed once a month. I didn't know that as a teenager. I was like, oh, it's the time of the month. Got to take my my, you know, my Advil, extra strength Advil or whatever we have in the house. And like, I just kind of operated that way, right? We had a hard time getting pregnant. I, I just didn't, I didn't know, you know, that something like that could even be an issue until I found out. And I remember being devastated, devastated. Like, I remember sitting in that waiting room and like being like, I I'm not gonna have children, right? And just being like, it gutting me because that's all I ever wanted to be is a mom. And I knew there was other paths to motherhood, but it just wasn't on my radar at that time. And, you know, we tried to have our first for 3 years, and I think it's more than it probably— and, and I know this is going to be different for everybody, right? And I'm just sharing my personal experience that unfortunately me not get pregnant, right? And may find alternative paths to parenthood. And I have friends in those situations. And, you know, I kind of think if you want to be a parent, you'll be a parent, you know, like you'll adopt, you'll find a way if you want to. There's lots of resources out there that are available. It's just being, it's being ready for that decision. Right. But for me, I just really felt like I wanted to be a mom and I wanted to be pregnant. And that was really hard. Like to let go of that, right? And I remember that. And we finally had like one miscarriage and we were like a few rounds. I think I was like one round away from doing IVF, which was a huge expense for us at the time. It was really stressful to think about. And I got pregnant on my, I think, last IUI that the insurance covered with Andrew, my oldest. And I was so nervous that entire pregnancy. It was so hard to enjoy it. And all I wanted was a healthy, happy baby. Well, right now Andrew's turning 10 this month of recording. And, you know, I think for me it more impacts me as a parent than anything, because I think when you've struggled to be a mom and then you become a mom, you're really not like the other moms. You're really not like the other moms, right? They're complaining about their kid, they're complaining about the activities. That never leaves you ever, right? I am very hands-on as a mom. So today, so, you know, for anybody who is— needs a positive message and wants to be a mom, so today I'm I'm a mom of 3 because the thing about endometriosis, as you know, for many people, the childbirth actually resolves a lot of the extra cell growth and for some challenges you can't get pregnant.

Some of them. Yeah.

So it was kind of a catch-22. So I got pregnant right away with our second after Andrew was born. Like I remember the doctor being like, all right, you're done nursing, you can get pregnant. And I was like, no, that's for people who don't have endometriosis. And then got pregnant with Josh when Andrew was 6 months old. And then, you know, I was undergoing a lot of stress with my previous business and I just really never thought about, you know, having a third. I just sort of thought, oh, that was lucky. Josh was lucky. That's when I had a sparkling new uterus and like, then that was it, right? And I, when I was 41 years old, I went to the doctor because I thought I was in premenopause and I was really, really worried. I was like very concerned, just gaining weight, not getting my period. And she was like, why don't we give you a pregnancy test? And I was like, no, thank you. Oh, you haven't looked at my chart.

Like, that's cute.

That's cute. That's cute. But like, sex doesn't get me pregnant. And, um, and so then she was like, let's just take a pregnancy test. And I was like, I No, there's no reason to. So she came in, she's like, it's positive. And I was like, well, that's got to be wrong. I want to take another one. So she gave me another one. She's like, well, that one's positive. And I just sat there and I looked at her. I was in shock.

Shock.

I, I couldn't— I mean, I, I held my hand, had my hand, and I was just like, I'm pregnant? Like, I was at, you know, I mean, I was out of the baby stage for a while at this point. And so I remember the nurse saying to the doctor on the way out, she goes, I'm not going back in there. And so that ended up being Naomi, who's 2, and I'm 44 now. So I had her when I was 42, which is crazy. Crazy.

If you—

I mean, you know, endometriosis, that's— it's just— that's just very unusual. But it does go to show the levels that, first of all, how much stress stress impacts our body, which is the worst thing to say to somebody who's trying to get pregnant. So you're like, how can I not be stressed? It's like the worst thing ever.

Right.

But it really does. Like, I was relaxed, I was fit. I was not running this stressful company anymore. I was in a period of transition. I was working on myself. I was meditating. And it's like, my body was like, chill, you know? And that's what happened. But the other thing I think for me, like I had said before, it does impact my business. And impacts me because of my just wanting to have such a strong relationship with my kids. I'm actually leaving a mastermind right now because I realized it's a week-long experience and I can't pop in and out. When I pop in and out for 2 or 3 days, I miss the whole thing. I don't develop the relationships. I haven't made the connections that I really need to make. And I'm like, leaving my kids for a week right now is just, it's just not for me.

Yeah.

And so, you know, every— in the beginning, every month I schedule alone time with every child. We do adventures together. Like, I just think, like, when— again, when you've gone through that and you become a mom, you're not like the other moms. You're not trying to get away from your kids. You, you know that pain, you know, like, and you— it just stays with you. So it probably wasn't the answer you were expecting, but that's my, that's my experience on the other side of It wasn't the answer, but it makes so much sense.

It makes so much sense, especially about the, like, the fact that you're like, the struggle of being to become a mom was like, it makes you view being a mom so much different. I feel the same way with when everyone, when everyone tells me like the first year of marriage is like the hardest year and then like 2, 3, and 4 and 5, you're like trying to decide if you know someone. The first year of my husband and I getting married was when I found out I had endometriosis. And we were going through so many things that it was like the view of marriage at that time was just like so much more— it was different than anybody else who was just talking about the first year of marriage. And I was like, what's wrong with you? Like, it's amazing because my husband has been here for me for all those things. And our whole marriage has definitely been defined to some extent because of that. And it's like, it's just different. And I kind of think— I kind of get where you're coming from, from that standpoint of like, when you're wanting something so badly and you're told you can't have it or it has some unlikelihood of happening and you achieve it, it's like, I'm going to cherish it even more, right?

Yeah, for sure. And I just think, you know, the moms I really get along with are the ones with the older kids. Because they get it, right? Like, their kids are teenagers and don't want to hang out with them anymore. Like, they're like, oh, I wish my kids were 8 and 10 again. I loved that age. You know, those are the moms I identify with because I'm like, I know, like, I wanted this so bad and I don't want to miss a moment, you know? Versus sometimes you talk to parents where— I don't want to say this, I'm just going to say it, it may sound weird, but it may be comforting to your audience. Like you could tell that it wasn't that hard for them to become a parent. And it's different. It's just different.

My audience totally understands because they feel that way with entrepreneurship. Yes, they feel that way with like running a business, who are living with constant pain, flare-ups, ups and downs, hospital visits, doctor's visits, and trying to run a business so that it can have the time freedom, while others who aren't necessarily living with that is like, oh, just sacrifice sleep. And you're over here like, I don't need to sacrifice sleep. I need sleep.

I will also say that again, I don't struggle with the chronic illness that I did before. It's just probably the phases of my body and hormones and all of that, right? Like, I don't experience the pain that I did, the physical pain that I did. Prior to kids. But one thing that I have noticed about myself as a result of the struggle of becoming a mom is that my business fits into my life. Life does not fit into my business. And I actually don't think it's a requirement. I don't think it's a requirement to, to work all night. In fact, I kind of think you're probably doing something wrong.

Exactly.

You have to work all night. There's something wrong with your offer. It's not landing well. There's no natural demand. Probably not forging the right relationships, which, you know, we'll chat a little bit about, I'm sure. So those are the things that I think, you know, I play a lot of tennis in case I haven't mentioned that yet.

You should check out her, her social media. She totally does. She's hardcore tennis.

It's a little embarrassing.

It's awesome.

But it's also pretty fun. There's something about pounding away when you're a mom of 3 with multiple businesses. There's something about that little fuzzy yellow tennis ball. Chasing around and pounding the heck out of it. Yeah, it is, uh, pretty rewarding.

Yeah.

But, and it's fun, it's social, and, you know, I get to have friends that aren't just on Zoom, you know. I get to have friends that, you know, again, they're not— they're outside of my identity as an entrepreneur. They ask me what I do, I just say, oh, you know, I work from home. Like, I don't get into it because it's like, it's, it's something I get to do outside of, you know, where that balances me, where I'm not just always in the same, you know, high-driving state, right? But, you know, I, I play tennis, I take care of my family, I don't work weekends, I don't work evenings. And it's not because, you know, I have some kind of magical system that other people don't have. I think it's just that focus and that priority that comes with time, the wisdom of being an entrepreneur for a long time and knowing, you know, kind of just knowing where you can get sucked down the rabbit hole and avoiding it and kind of knowing where The high impact activities are, and that just takes time. But I also think it's from the commitment to never going back to burnout. Like I never want to go back there. I never want to be that stressed again. And just knowing, like, I don't care, you know, I'm very blessed that my business has grown tremendously, but I also know that I'd rather have a smaller business and not go back there. Cause once you get to burnout, it's very hard to come back.

Yeah. Yeah.

So speaking about that, like, why does burnout— I, I would love to hear what you think. Like, why does burnout happen for a lot of entrepreneurs, especially when it comes to like marketing? I think honestly most people are burnt out because of offers and their marketing around those offers. So how does one know where they should spend their time and what type of relationships Yeah. And, and marketing.

Yeah. So I think a lot of people get burnt out in marketing for a couple reasons. The first is because the marketing that they're doing lacks authenticity. So they feel like they have to do something or be somebody that is not authentic to who they are or isn't authentic to their values. And so when you are operating out of alignment with yourself, It takes a lot of energy.

Yes.

It takes a lot of you to manufacture something that isn't authentic. And second of all, it's because they're doing marketing that they don't enjoy. Now, whether you're introverted or you're extroverted, I don't care. I think most people are wired for connection and most people are wired for relationship. Yeah. And that's why I'm such a big fan of relationship marketing is because you can do it in a way that works for you in a way that's that's truly authentic, that isn't going to burn you, burn you out. Now, the mistake that some people make with, with relationship marketing is that they, what they might do is like fill up their calendar with coffee chats or something like that. Like, yes, that will burn you out. But when you, or you're not developing the right relationships, you're not going about it in the right way. And then it just ends up being, you know, friendly chitchat, which, you know, I can get on the tennis court So, um, you really wanna do— you see a theme for your friends?

Yes.

Really what we wanna do is we wanna develop the right relationships in the right way in order to create reciprocal exchanges so we can connect each other to one another's audiences and have genuine connections where we don't have to feel like we're not ourselves or out of alignment, or we have to lie about who we are. We have to sugarcoat something. That's where we just feel like, so burnt out. I mean, burnout can come for a lot of different reasons, but I think that's particularly why people get burnt out on marketing.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I'm like, see, guys, I have been preaching this and I'm not alone. Like, I'm not alone in talking about the importance of, of that alignment is so important. And you're so right about the energy. It takes so much energy to try to force yourself to be something, one, you're not, and one, you don't enjoy. And I always add on on top of that, if you're living with chronic illness, which a lot of my, like, women that are listening to this, and you have families and you have a corporate job and you have a side hustle and all of these different things, you don't have the energy to try to be something you're not.

Yeah.

And that's part of the challenge of growing a business if you're not coming from that authentic place.

Yeah.

So what is some advice you would give to folks who are wanting to maybe step into consulting? I love consulting because it helps you to leverage what you are already naturally good at and what you do.

Yeah. I love consulting because it's very specific to problem solving, right? Like coaching is more of a personal journey. I love coaching. I have a coach. I invest in coaches. I believe in coaching, but consulting's a little bit different. It's taking a predefined problem and coming up with a solution that fast-tracks the success typically of a business, right? And so for a lot of people, they think they can't get into consulting because they don't feel ready yet or they're not there yet. But the truth is, with consulting, the way in which you create value is by flattening the— you know, helping your client get a result faster, quicker, cheaper, easier than they would without you, right? That's just consulting. And for many businesses, they are missing that thought partner. Like, they might have— maybe part of a coaching program, maybe part of a mastermind. They may be getting— they might even be getting more confused, you know, by being in that environment versus having somebody one-on-one that's looking at the business and all of the moving parts and making recommendations. That's what I really love about consulting.

Yeah. One big question for Laura.

Yeah.

When it comes to mindset as an entrepreneur, what has been one that you personally have had to develop, overcome to be where you are?

So it's a great question. I think that when it comes to mindset, the thoughts that we get to, that we can choose, that thoughts are optional, right? The thoughts that we choose about a situation are totally optional. And I will give a non-business example to help people think about where this may apply in their lives. So, you know, I played tennis in high school and college. I took a lot of time off when I was running that big business. And then as soon as I thought about getting back into tennis, I found out I was pregnant with Naomi. So I only got back into tennis a few years ago. And when I first got back, it was humbling because I used to be good. And I was no longer good. And it was hard. And, you know, I would join clubs and I would join groups and they would kind of sometimes invite me but sometimes not. Or I'd see them out without me. I walk by and I would be like, oh, that would have been nice to be invited to that little party happening over there, tennis party happening over there. And what I— the thought I decided to choose, and this was really hard because so many of us, we might see something happening that we wish we were belong to or wish we were included That happens to everybody, everybody, everybody at every level of business. It happens, right? And we're like, oh, it's a group of people that like didn't include me. That's, that's lovely. And I think what I chose to believe, my instinct was I'm not good enough. I'm not gonna fit in with those girls. Those girls went to high school together, probably. I'm not from here. I had all of these stories, right?. And I consciously, this was really hard because it was so against my grain and so against my nature because I would assume automatically I'm not included. And I just went down that rabbit hole. Right. But I chose to believe that it was just going to take time. I just kept saying to myself, I'm like, it's just going to take time. It's going to take time for me to get good again. And it's going to take time for those ladies to include me. And you know, I signed up for a team. At the tennis club I'm at. And like, they didn't play me, you know, once that first season. And I was just like, they don't like me. They don't want an outsider, blah, blah, blah. And I was like, this is just gonna take time. Like every time something happened, I'm like, this is just gonna take time. So here I am 2 years later and they're all like, be on my team, come on, I practice. Like, I can't, I can't turn down the invite.

Quickly enough.

You know, like I had 2 invites this morning that were competing at the same time, and I was like, I'm sorry, I'm already doing this thing with this other group. Um, because first of all, I became a better player, and second of all, so, you know, naturally people want to include you. And then second of all, they take time. Relationships just take time, right? And I was coming out of COVID and wanted more in-person friends, and I was like, this is gonna— it's just gonna take time. Now It's very comfortable. I'm never self-conscious, but I thought about that recently where I was like, gosh, if I had just given up, like, I would've given up all of this. And it really was just a matter of time. All those ladies knew each other, their families knew each other. They'd been at the club for a long time. It was a country club I had just joined. And they didn't think of me because I was new. And I think that's really what it came down to. So instead of kind of thinking like, they don't like me, I don't belong, I'll never be included. I'm not good enough. I just thought like, this is just going to take time and they're not including me because I'm new and they probably forgot about me, you know?

Yeah.

And the result is very different, right? The result I have now is exactly what I wanted, which is to have in-person friends that include me and involve me. And I'm on all the text lists and all the invite lists. And the other result, if I had kind of been like, I'm not doing this anymore. Those ladies are, you know, mean, or don't include— they're not inclusive, or whatever. I would have never had the result that I have now. So I just think the thoughts that we choose to believe about any particular situation at any given time has a lot to do with the results of those thoughts. And a lot of times we have to choose thoughts that go against our wiring. A lot of our wiring comes from trauma or history that it doesn't necessarily in our operating in our favor.

Yeah, I love that because it kind of lines up with something I heard someone else say. It's like the thought you think you naturally would choose, but it's like, what if I'm wrong, right? Like, what if, what if, like what you're saying, the result is, well, they just know each other so much more. It's not that I'm not enough. What if I, I am enough, and it just needs time. Like, that thought can— is so much easier to accept and to see, and the results are exactly what you want. I love, I love that.

Yeah. Is there an upside to the thought, right? What's the upside? So there's a lot of upside to me being like, it's just going to take time. Like, I remember that summer, that first summer, I'd walk into the pool and they were all sitting together. I'd go sit by myself, you know, and which is hilarious because online I'm very connected, but this was, you know, a personal goal of having in-person local friends. I just didn't have that many of them. I had been working my butt off in that old business, and then by the time I came up for air, I had, you know, our third baby, and I was like, I really want more in-person local friends. And I just think, like, what's the upside to I don't belong, I'm not enough? There's not a lot of upside to that. There's a lot of upside to, like, eventually I'll be included, eventually they'll ask me eventually I'll belong because they've all been hanging out for a long time and I'm kind of new here.

Love that. It's like good things take time. I love to say like it just takes time. So, so very good. So how can people like connect with you? Do you have any new exciting things happening? I know your book is coming out soon. Yeah, we love to hear.

Yeah, so my book Win Win is coming out on December 6th, 2022. So depending on when you're listening to this, you probably will be able to either pre-order it or order it. So if it's before December 6th, you'll be able to pre-order it by going to createyourwinwin.com. So that's createyourwinwin.com. When you pre-order my book, you get my Relationship Marketing Toolkit, which is a free mini course that I am giving to you complimentary as a thank you for pre-ordering my book. If you— it's after December 6th when you're listening to this, you can still go to createyourwinwin.com com. You can order the book and then also obtain some free resources that'll help you solidify the concepts inside of the book.

So awesome. Well, we'll have all of those links and everything in the show notes, y'all. Thank you so much, Laura, for being on the show. This was a lot of fun.

Yes, it was a pleasure. Thank you so much for having me.

Yeah, that's a wrap, y'all. Thanks for tuning in to Crafted to Thrive, the podcast that helps entrepreneurs with chronic illness to thrive and build a holistic business and life. Check out our website at craftedtothrive.com for this episode's show notes and all the gifts and goodies. Connect with me on Instagram @thrive_with_nikita for more tips and behind the scenes and more. Tag me to share what you loved about this episode, and I'll feature you on an upcoming episode. So until next time, remember, yes, you are crafted to thrive.