The One Thing You Need Before You Can Scale Your Business

Welcome to She's Crafted to Thrive. I'm your host, Nikita Williams, and this show is for all the ladies who are making and creating things that they love. You will hear conversations about the real everyday struggles of juggling life and business while trying to maintain passion and harmony. As women, we have the skill of getting things done, but sometimes we get in our own way. It's here where you'll see that you're not alone. You'll discover that success does not mean perfection. Fear Fear and negative thoughts and challenges are all a part of the journey. And on this podcast, you'll find the inspiration and tools you need to have a life and business that thrives. Welcome back to the She's Crafted to Thrive Show. This is your host, Nikita Williams, and I am really excited about this episode because it took me a minute to decide whether or not I was going to record this episode. And honestly, it always takes me a minute to decide what I'm going to talk about during my solo because I have one of those businesses where I spend a lot of time teaching women how to market their business, how to get their business out there, how to get started with their business, how to pivot in their business. And we're always talking about strategies and tools and all of the things, right? But truly at heart, I'm a mindset coach because for me, that's the journey I've been on in life in general, just from living with multiple chronic illnesses, to building a business and multiple different iterations of this business over the last decade, which y'all, y'all don't understand how the word decade sounds like to me. I feel so old when I say it, and I know there are people probably listening to this and y'all like, girl, please, you are so not old. But in my head, it feels like I can't believe it's been a decade really since I've been on this journey online as an entrepreneur, which is insane. And that's not even counting, like, from my first entrepreneur job when I was like 15. So I've been doing this for a very long time. And I think the biggest changes along my journey has been about mindset, has been about the way that I see things or decide to do things. And that mindset has also been the thing that has helped me with my journey with multiple chronic illnesses. You know, I used to feel like I had to try everything all at one time. And I had to do all of the things, and I have worked really hard and continue to work really hard through giving myself a little grace and just doing what I can when I can. And that's what I preach constantly to you guys, and especially to my ladies inside of my membership and my one-on-one clients. I really just talk about, like, do what you can when you can, be as consistent as you can, and be okay with that. You know, we put so much pressure on ourselves. So this episode really is about how we can build some roots into our journey and not be easily blown over, if you will. And so I'm using the analogy of the olive tree, and I'm going to share with you 3 ways to build roots in your life, in your business, that will help you have a more sustainable and profitable journey. So before I do that, I wanted to give like an update on my journey with my chronic illness. A lot of you guys have sent me messages on Instagram, which I— like, you guys don't know how much that makes me feel so, like, loved and cared for on a whole nother level of people who are listening to the show. So as many of you may know, and I know we have a lot of new listeners since our partnership with The Handmade Cellar magazine, but last year I was diagnosed with two new chronic illnesses. And one of them is chronic bladder pain. And it has been a really difficult journey from figuring out what can work, what's not going to work, trying different ways to help manage the pain. And re-taking a look at my diet and the things that I eat and drink and all of that jazz. And of course, I've been working with a doctor and a holistic coach, and, you know, we're taking the steps. But all honesty, it has been really difficult. I've been dealing with so many different chronic illnesses over the years that I realized through working with my mindset coach recently that I don't think I have worked through a lot of those things. But some of the things that I have not worked through is some of the medical trauma that I've experienced through this process. And medical trauma, if you don't know what that is, it's just things that— and I just say, I don't mean just because it's not just, it's like trauma is trauma, right? But many occasions and many experiences that either contributed to my pain that were unnecessary or things that contributed to my pain that, you know, it wasn't anyone's fault. It's just the circumstances of being where you are while you're living with a chronic illness, trying to figure out what's going on. So I recently had one of those experiences while dealing with figuring out a way to manage the pain that I'm going through with my chronic bladder pain. And man, it really affected me more than I realized. And I am definitely working through that from an emotional place because it's not easy to experience more pain or feel like you've given yourself more pain just from trying to deal with the pain, right? And I'm just really thankful that during this journey of these new diagnoses that I have like a team of people in my world that can really help me and help me to thrive even through this and also help me to realize that I still have a lot of work to do when it comes to the emotional aspects of living with a chronic illness. And I'm really thankful, obviously, for the support from my family and friends, as well as the people that I now have in my corner from a health standpoint. But I wanted to share that with you because I think I think a lot of times, you know, we think like, "Oh, Nikita's doing so great." Or you might even feel like, "I'm doing so great now." And then something can come out of left field and throw a wrench in your plans and you're feeling like you're starting all over again and you're not. It's just that you're learning in a different way. I know for me, had this diagnosis come around the time that I got my endo and my fibro diagnosis, which were back in 2009 and 2010, I don't think I would've had the necessary tools to deal with the emotional or even the physical aspects of things. There are so many things that I know now from a natural standpoint that helped me even get to the doctor's office or to do a particular therapy or something like that for this pain that I didn't have before. So I'm very, very grateful for that. And so if you're going through something new, just think about that, all of the things that you've experienced up until now and how you are better equipped to handle what's going on. And also, because I am way more aware of my emotions and my feelings, I am able to actually deal with in the moment and the weeks after how I really feel versus, like, pushing things down and acting as if it wasn't there. Because those things can really weaken your confidence in yourself, in your journey, and all of that jazz. So I just wanted to share that little piece of my story real quick because I know that there are women who listen to this that are going through different life hurdles and chronic illness diagnosis, especially during this whole COVID situation. And you might be feeling like, "Man, I'm going backwards." But I assure you, you are not, because you have so much knowledge that you have brought to this moment and to this time right now that can serve you in a beautiful way to make the path forward in this journey a lot more bearable. And also, if you're listening to this episode, you're not alone. You're never alone, even if you're not listening to this episode. But I'm sure that means you have a community or you know where you can find a community of women or people and friends that can really relate to you. And if you feel like that's not here, I really recommend that you check out Chronic Con, which is a great place for people with chronic illnesses that are going through different things every day, and they share their thoughts and feelings. Check them out. Check out Clubhouse. There's great clubs on there dedicated to people with chronic illnesses and disabilities, and it's not all negative. It's a lot of positive and ways to really help you in your journey. So There's that. And this episode, I'm really super excited because I'm kind of delving into the mindset piece of things. And honestly, with my business, it's always like a push and pull of whether or not I'm going to share with you guys on my solo cast something like a tip for marketing. But I honestly feel like those things are so easy to find on Google, right? Or YouTube or someone else is talking about it. When I talk about social, like marketing aspects, to me, it's not anything new. It's not anything special in the sense that you can't find it from someone else. But what I do think hinders the ability to even do those strategies or even go look for those strategies is mindset. If your mind is not in a place that allows you to accept the possibility of growth and success, then you can have all the strategies in the world and it's not gonna work because your mind is not there with you. So let's hop right on into this episode here. 3 ways to build roots in your business and in your life to have profitable growth. You know, I love to spend time looking at creation and just things out in nature. And I did this a couple years ago, I think maybe 2, 2 years ago. And this has always been something I wanted to share with you guys. So I hope you find it useful. This is about the olive tree. Has anyone seen an olive tree? They're— they are not really the prettiest things, but They are huge and really interesting looking, and they live a really long time. Some trees, some olive trees have been around, like, since Christ was on Earth. So that's a really long time, right? And the thing about this tree is that it's not the most beautiful. It's not really all that great to look at, but it's really interesting to look at. If you compare it to, like, maybe the sequoia trees in California, of course those are, like, beautiful and gorgeous and tall, right? They're completely different. But scientists have said that the olive tree is kind of like an indestructible tree. And there's a couple of different reasons. And what I love about this story and these facts about this tree is that it really reminded me of the journey of living with chronic illness and also the journey of entrepreneurship. It's not really all that pretty on the outside. Like we, you know, sometimes we get into it thinking it's pretty, but when we really get into it, we we see all of its flaws, we see all of the challenges that are ahead of us, and it seems not so great. But it is interesting, right? That's always like— my husband always says, Nikita, you say interesting when you're not really into something, or you're like, really don't know what to think about it, or it's like, interesting, like you have a question mark about it. And that's kind of how entrepreneurship can feel like sometimes, right? But this beautiful tree in its own way, because to me, now that I know about this tree and I've done some research, it is beautiful in its own right. The fact that it is indestructible to me is beautiful, right? Because who doesn't want to be or feel indestructible? And so I thought, what a parallel that this tree and the things that I learned about it are to our journey with chronic illness and with entrepreneurship. So this, this story, these facts are for you. I want you to think about how are you creating a root system for yourself so that you can thrive, so that you can endure no matter what comes your way in business and in life. You know, there are so many different strategies in business that people are constantly trying to do and all of those different things. But a lot of times the reason why we aren't getting to where we want to go or seeing the response that we want to see isn't necessarily that we don't have the tools that we need from a marketing standpoint. We haven't identified something in our mindset or in our habits or routines or rituals that we do that we're completely unaware of. And I feel like looking at this tree is going to be helpful. So I'm going to share with you 3 things about this tree and how they really correlate to us as, you know, women going through this journey of entrepreneurship in life. And some facts I just thought I'd share with you right now because it is a really cool tree. If you have time, Google it. If you're on your phone and you're listening to this or if you're at work, literally, like, Google an olive tree. You'll see what I'm saying. It's not the most pretty, but to me, it is absolutely gorgeous because it has qualities that makes it almost indestructible, which is amazing. One of the beautiful things about this tree is that its root system is very unlike most trees. The roots grow or reach to about 20 feet underground and can grow and will grow horizontally. So not just down into the ground vertically, but horizontally. Its root system is so intertwined, and it's the thing that makes it basically indestructible. It helps it endure during different challenges in the environment, different conditions, really harsh conditions like hurricanes, tornadoes, and even earthquakes is something that I mentioned that even after those things, an olive tree can still be standing and rooted. What? Isn't that amazing? So that's why it's really special. It has found a way to thrive. So you would think there's a couple of things that needs to be in place. And so scientists have said there are 3 things that it needs to thrive. And here are the 3 things: it needs room to grow. So it can't be crowded out by unnecessary things, and it needs to be an aerated or well-aerated soil. I'll talk about these things individually and that it needs to be free from weeds. So you guys hopefully are like following me with this. These three things are literally things we need for ourselves to create a sustainable and profitable business. And here's how. Number one is you know, needing room to grow. Don't we all need that space? I think a lot of the times we go into the journey of entrepreneurship with a very fixed mindset sometimes on what we want and where we're going versus a growth mindset. And also when it comes to the mindset, when you're starting a business, you want people to view you as an authority. So we can sometimes put on this air of like, I know all the things, nobody's going to tell me anything. And I'm just here I'm here to serve you, so let me show you me. And the beautiful truth in that is that that does not actually lead to success, but humility and learning and asking questions do. And to me, that is what helps us to create room to grow for ourselves. It really does give us the ability to build a root system for our own adventures in life, to be completely rooted in that sense, like creating the space for us to grow. Number 2 is it was mentioned that the soil needed to be aerated so that it can breathe. Aeration creates this thing for the soil where it makes it possible for the nutrients from the air, the oxygen and the water, and the different yucky bugs and worms to feed the soil in which the tree thrives on. So what does that look for like for us, for our entrepreneur journey? Like, what does that look like even for our chronic illness journey? It means that we really need to give ourselves some grace. We need to give priority to the things that really allow us to be in the space to be more humble, to be in the space to be able to grow. And so to me, that means that we need to focus on the things that help us fills our cup. Self-care looks like so many different things, but it really means about being aware of your thoughts, your emotions, your feelings, your body, being aware of your spiritual need, what you need in order for you to have a foundation of hope and a foundation that you're not doing this alone, right? We're not in this alone. And the other piece of that aeration that I believe is that we need space to just be who we are. And when I say just to be who we are, we need time to enjoy the things that make us happy, that are not, like, constrained by, you know, what other people are thinking and why, you know, people are thinking that. Like, do things that light you up. That's part of self-care. Self-care is such a broad word. I know it's really buzzy right now. But in order for us to build a root system or an indestructible, sustainable path for ourselves is that we need to build something where we are really clear on who we are and what we want and where we need to be. So that's a really big, important piece that I think, you know, aeration means that you are putting yourself in a place that means that you are preparing yourself to be successful. You're preparing yourself to accept growth. You're preparing yourself for the storms, for for the harsh environment, just like that tree is doing, right? And the last thing is to be free of weeds. That's so like life. Like, to me, it's like we need to be free of the negativity of other people. My coach says that, you know, she's my coach, she's my mentor, I just love her pieces, but she says we have to take the negativity or the toxic out of love. You know, a lot of times we do a lot of things because We are, you know, we want to love people, but somehow we have wrapped that love into doing things that really is negative and hurts us and ultimately even hurts the other person. So besides just, you know, being careful about who you allow in your space or even removing them from your space, if you need to, it's also about the things you listen to. It's about the things you talk about, the things you read, the people you allow in your space, the community, the groups of people that are in your area. If those things are negative, it can really affect your ability to build a root system that's indestructible. It can really make it hard for you to build a business that's thriving on growth and a growth mindset and being able to embrace who you are. Because if you're stifled— like, what do weeds do? It chokes what's real. It can crowd out the beautiful, you know, things. Right? And so it's the same thing with other negativity. Negativity is so much easier to lean into and to go because that's how, like, how our brains work. It's so much easier to see even the negative things of, of ourselves. So we really need to work on that. One way we can counterbalance that is by having a gratitude attitude, making a point to be thankful, making it a point to say thank you and be thankful for the people that are bringing positivity into our lives. And another way to avoid weeds in our journey is to tell people when they are creating that type of harsh environment for us and why it affects us and how they can stop. Like, ask them what you would like. Create those boundaries, right? And those are the 3 things that I really have come to appreciate with this beautiful, yet not so beautiful on the outside, indestructible, as many scientists have called it, olive tree. So these are the 3 things that we need to build roots in our, in our journey, no matter whether it's for business, whether it's life in general, having these things will really help. So I'm going to recap that. That is have room for growth. So have a growth mindset, you guys. Be willing to ask questions, be willing to not know, be humble. That's really hard. Like, it's hard for me. It's hard for me. I make it a practice now when I go into Clubhouse rooms to try to ask a question before I even think about leaving a piece of value because questions are valuable to you guys. Like, think about how we grew up as kids. Like, we were always asking questions. We were always learning and look at how we've become who we are today. But for some reason, when we get older, we just stop asking questions. Why? Why do we do that? Because we want to be seen or perceived a certain way. But questions are really enlightful. They help change our perspectives. They help us widen our horizons, if you will. Number 2 was to aerate your soil. Make sure you're preparing yourself for the storms that are ahead, right? Preparing yourself for this long journey. So that means self-care. That means paying attention to your spiritual needs, paying attention to your mental capacity and where you are. Those are so important for the long haul. And number 3 was to beware or to avoid weeds, like to be free. Actually, the science article brought out that olive trees often are free of weeds. You don't really find weeds in their vicinity because they will choke out the tree and its root system. So that's the same thing. Negativity is basically a weed, and it can choke out our ability to thrive in whatever environment, harsh environments that we have going on in our lives. And believe it or not, we can be the weed. We can be saying the negative things in our heads that are choking out our ability for growth and endurance and success. So first, check with yourself to see if you are the root of that weed and start working on things like gratitude and becoming aware and being very thoughtful and intentional about the things that you think about, the things that you allow into your space, the people you allow into your space. And then start paying attention to everyone outside of you and everything outside of you. Are they bringing more negativity into your world? Are you allowing love to come in, but this toxic love where it's like, "I love you, but I'm also going to be negative in a sense that's not constructive." Pay attention to those things and point them out and speak the truth about them and ask for something different. Ask for a positive outcome from, you know, the people that we love and care about. So those are the 3 things. I hope this was helpful. I hope this mindset and visual of an olive tree will help you to think twice when you want to say no to something, when you want to, or you feel pulled to showboat like we all do. I am so guilty of that. Like, think about the olive tree. It may not be so pretty on the outside. People may not understand why you are doing that or why you might ask those questions or why you're always asking questions or all of those different things, but it's not for them necessarily. It's for you so that you can have a long, indestructible, thriving, enduring journey that we're all on, whether in life or in entrepreneurship or in chronic illness. All of it's a journey and we need to build qualities that allows us to thrive sustainably. And that is it for me today. I hope that this was helpful. I would love to hear your thoughts on this episode. And if you thought that these 3 things may made sense to you. And if they did, please leave a comment on sheescrafted.com in this particular episode, or shoot me a DM on Instagram @craftedtothrive. I'd love to hear what you think. And don't forget to leave us a review. And this month coming up, we have some amazing speakers or amazing guests for the show, so be sure to stay tuned and share with a friend. And remember that, yes, you are crafted to thrive.