This is a short YouTube podcast episode (“So You Want To Be Happy?”) hosted by Pamela Jean (A New Life podcast). Pamela frames happiness as an inside job and argues listeners should stop living for others’ approval and instead care primarily about the opinions of people who love them. Practical guidance includes embracing one’s uniqueness, examining why one cares about others’ opinions (linking it to self-doubt), prioritizing one’s inner circle over strangers or social-media critics, and practicing self-love. She uses a Taylor Swift speech/example to illustrate that you cannot please everyone and ends with a call-to-action to subscribe/share the podcast.
Welcome to A New Life podcast with Pamela Jean, where it's all about empowering women to empower more women. Get ready, friends, to create a new life. And here is your host, Pamela Jean.
Hello, my friends, and welcome to this week's episode of A New Life podcast. I'm Pamela Jean and I am your host of this podcast today. Thank you so much for being here. My topic today is a very, very simple question. Do you want to be happy? And I guess I'll follow that with one more question. Do you want to be happy? And do you know how to be happy? There's some people that you meet in life that are absolutely not happy ever. You may know some of those people. Someone may have popped into your mind, but my question is for you personally. Personally, do you want to be happy? And do you know how to get there? The one topic that I'm going to talk about today surrounding that is caring only about the opinions of people who love you. Now, I think if we're being honest, we all have gotten trapped in the web of other people's opinions. We've gotten stuck in that trap. And we think about if someone doesn't talk to you at the office or someone, a client or a friend, doesn't respond to you in a way that you expect them to respond immediately, we go into the spin cycle and make it about us. Well, through the podcast today, we're going to talk about that. It's time for us, me included, to stop this ridiculous thinking. Life is way too short to be living for someone else's applause or approval. So here's a few tips and some ideas I want to pass on to you today. First of all, embrace your uniqueness. Here's the deal. You are a one of a kind masterpiece, my friend. There's only one, one person like you in the whole entire world is you. You're so unique. Embrace your uniqueness. It's time to explore the power of embracing just exactly how unique you are. Forget the cookie cutter expectations societies throw at you. It's time for you to shine in your very own light and be proud of the person you are and the person you are becoming. Because I don't care how old you are, you're forever evolving. As long as there's breath in your lungs, as long as you've woken up every single day. If you're awake listening to this today, you're still evolving. We're all evolving into the people that we are meant to to be. My next point is, why do you care? Why do you care what Other people think of you. Have you ever wondered why that matters to you so much and how much weight and power that has over you? I want to talk about shedding that unnecessary weight of other people's opinions and stepping into the life that you were called to be, where you are called to be unapologetically yourself. An answer to that is really, it stems from the opinion that you have about yourself. If you live in insecurity and self doubt, you are teaching everyone in your life, everyone around you, how to treat you. Others are going to take the lead that you have demonstrated to them. But when you unapologetically love who you are and believe in yourself, it won't matter what other people think. And here's something that I wish I would have learned earlier in life, is that you will never, ever be everything for everyone. And my friends, that is okay. You're not meant to be everybody else's person, starting with that self. Love is so important. But I wanted to share this with you because I think it's so interesting. I was listening to a speech that Taylor Swift was giving, and here are some of the things that she said. They say I'm dating too much in my 20s. Okay, I will stop dating and I will just stay single. Now they are saying my album Red is filled with too many breakup songs. Oh, okay. I'll make one about moving to New York and deciding that really my life is more fun with just, just my friends. Now they're saying my music is changing too much to stay in country music. So I do a complete genre shift and create a pop album called 1989. Now they're saying I'm posting too many friends pictures of just my friends. Okay, I'll stop doing that too. Now I'm actually a calculated manipulator, not a smart business woman. Okay, so I'll disappear from public view for years. Now I'm being cast as a villain to you. So here's an album called Reputation. There are a lot of snakes in it. Oh my gosh, who lets this scrutiny break them? As you can tell from that Taylor Swift excerpt, you'll never be able to please everyone ever. You know, some people might say, okay, your skirt is too short. Well, then someone will say, well, that one's too long. Well, then your hair should be pulled back. No, it should be down. Or it should be short. No, it should be long. You're never going to please everybody. And if you really had full understanding of acceptance of others and opinions, if you had a full understanding when people give opinions about Others, a lot of their opinions stem from their own insecurities. So a random person who doesn't even really hold any weight or power or control in your life or really simply don't matter are expressing opinions about you or other people. But those opinions come from their own personal insecurities. So here's my conclusion. You know, first of all, you'll never be able to please everyone. Whether you're in business or whether it's family or whether it's friends or just meeting people on the street, you'll never please everyone. And the sooner you stop trying to please everyone and just live up to your best possible potential. Love who you are, number one. That is your pathway to this. And truly, the pathway to pure happiness begins with the person looking in the mirror. It begins with you, period. No one can make you happy. Happiness is an inside job. With that being said, start focusing on who matters in your life. You know, there are people who love you unconditionally and sometimes that's family and sometimes that's not. But there are people who love you unconditionally and are getting what's left of you, not what's best of you. Because we get so caught up in improving, proving ourselves to the people at work or trying to impress the people at the gym, or impress people on the job, or impress people at your church or wherever you socialize. You're so busy worried about impressing other people that are outside of you, that are not even in your inner circle, that the people who are in your inner circle, the opinions of the people who love you the most and deserve the best of you are getting what's left of you. So consider shifting who really matters in your life. Is it the haters on social media or your family? Is it the grumpy employer or is it your spouse? Caring about the opinions of people who love you more than those who will never love you is simply a no brainer and a game changer. Once you shift your thoughts and actions around this, I promise you, friends, it is just. It's life changing. It lifts up all of this additional pressure that you really don't even need in your life. So stop trying to be everything for all of those people that will never love you unconditionally, it's not worth it. Stop trying to impress the people on social media or at the gym or wherever you are in your world. Start focusing on the opinions of the people that you love the most or that love you the most. And the true pathway to happiness is learning to love yourself first. Thank you so much, friends for joining me today. I really, really appreciate you spending time with me. If you enjoyed this podcast or know someone who needs to hear these words, please share this podcast. Go to your Apple podcast. There's a share button. Go ahead and subscribe. Write a review. The more traction we get in those areas, the more people are going to find us and get the help that they potentially could use as well. So friends, make it a great day. Have an amazing week and I'll see you next week.
Thank you for joining us today on a New Life podcast. We will see you next time.
