Paula Caligiuri, PhD, explains that beyond shared interests and supportive communication, experiencing adversity together can strengthen friendships. She gives everyday examples (working late on a deadline, exhausting team sports), warns against manufacturing hardship, and advises using the post-adversity period to connect and do something enjoyable to seed supportive friendships.
Most of us know that shared interests, spending quality time, and supportive communication are important when building friendships. Did you know that sharing adversity also helps us to make friends? When you start from a place of mutual respect, overcoming adversity together can strengthen bonds. You'll know exactly what I mean if you've ever worked late to the night with colleagues at a looming deadline, or played a team sport that was physically exhausting. Of course, I'm not suggesting that you artificially create adversity. No one wants that. But if you do go through a tough experience with someone, use that time after the experience to connect and do something enjoyable. That shared, difficult experience might be the start of a supportive friendship. Follow me to learn more.
