Peter Sabo recounts a childhood anecdote (age ~4–5) where a cousin/uncle threw his lollipop to the chickens, and his parents did not intervene. He explains how that event produced feelings of being unloved, worthless, and 'not good enough' which ossified into identity and life-long self-sabotaging beliefs. Sabo describes using memory-flipping/mindset techniques to reframe the memory (celebrating gifts rather than loss), altering unconscious data and identity, which improved his outcomes. He urges listeners to examine formative memories that may have created limiting beliefs and to 'clean them up' to change present and future.
Chapters
I thought I was a bad kid because I licked the lollipop. I know, sounds crazy. My name is Peter Sabo, but I remember when I was like four years old, I went to my cousin's place in like a village and they all gave us these three cousins, including myself. They gave us these lollipops, right? And we're enjoying them and whatnot. And I'm just by myself walking into the kitchen and I see my parents sitting on the right and my uncle and whatnot, his wife on the left telling me that, hey, it's time for lunch, like eat your candy later. But no, no, I want to eat my candy now. We go a little back and forth and then the uncle, the guy rips the lollipop out of my hand, throws it to the chickens. Boom, it's gone, it's in the dirt. No way to retrieve it. And I remember I just looked at him, I looked at everyone and I just started crying really bad at like four or five years old. The worst part about this wasn't even that, like it was gone forever. There's no way to fix it. But then I turn to my parents and I look at them and they didn't say anything, right? They didn't protect me, they didn't say, hey, don't do that. And of course, looking back now, in hindsight, makes sense, you know, like they didn't want any arguments. We were guests in their house and ultimately they wanted good for me, right? They loved me. They wanted me to eat lunch first, get the healthy food and then dessert. Makes sense. But you know, as a four year old, as a child, you don't have that level of logic, that part of your brain hasn't even developed yet, right? So to me, at that age, you know, looking around and being treated so harshly, I mean, my uncle was an army guy, right? No one ever has treated me that harshly. To me, even though it may seem small, it was like a massive trauma. You know, I really felt unloved, not, not accepted. I felt like I did something really, really wrong for this to happen. I really felt worthless at that moment. And the worst part, see, my parents not give, you know, a. Not doing anything about. It was like, wow, at this point I'm like abandoned. I must, must have done really something really wrong. Because even the people that I love the most do not care about me at this point in time, right? And I didn't realize this for the longest time, but looking back, I, I understood that this little memory has created the cascade of effects. It turned into A belief that I'm not good enough, I'm not worthy, I'm not deserving, ultimately turned into an identity, a part of my identity, and then ultimately turned into all sorts of problems, insecurities, feeling inadequate, constantly comparing myself to other people. I'm not as good as them at that, or I'm not as good looking as them, or whatever the case may be, you're not as rich as them. And constantly living in these loops of like not good enough, uh, you know, and ultimately fearing that I won't be loved because if I'm not good enough, it means I'm not gonna get love, right? Which really, if you think about it, is our deepest human fear. It's that we won't be good enough. And then really beneath that, what's hiding beneath that is we won't be loved. Look, because love is literally the oxygen for the soul when a baby is born. But they're not given that physical touch, that love from the mother, they sometimes even die. Because love is, is extremely important for the baby. And then as that baby grows up, it still is. And if we don't get it, or these things happen and we develop this whole story about what happened, and we create a belief, identity, well, then that can shape the rest of our lives forever. Unless you go back in the past one more time, look at it, clean it up, flip it, and then that's how you create a new present and future. You know, I had to go back in here, I had to use some of the memory flipping techniques to clean it up, to change the memory, where instead of things being taken away, not being loved, I'm celebrating them being, you know, gifted things. And of course, let's not be delusional here. I'm still logically aware of what actually happened. I know that what I'm talking about is made up. And I did some weird mindset work to get this accomplished. But the bottom line is that the data in my unconscious has been changed, that sense of identity has been changed. And because of it I was able to produce better results in life. Because as you could imagine, feeling inadequate, not loved, etc will create many issues. You know, you may try to achieve a goal, but then you self sabotage because deep down you don't feel like you deserve it. And that's the biggest problem that was holding me back too. But when I finally went to the source, cleaned up the memory, everything else fell into place right after. So that's what I would recommend. Go look deep within yourself. How do you perceive yourself? And is there any memories that might have altered your sense of self, you know, might have made you kind of look at yourself and see yourself less worthy and less valuable, less deserving than you really, truly are. Because I fundamentally believe that as humans, it is our birthright to feel loved. No matter what. Whether you're a good or bad person, it is our birthright, and do not be stealing that love away from yourself. So with that being said, this is Peter Sabo, and I'll see you in the next one.
