Short personal-reflection video by Peter Szabo arguing that money alone does not produce lasting happiness. Using his own "first million" anecdote, he explains human adaptation to new circumstances and says lasting happiness arises from (1) making progress toward meaningful goals and (2) becoming a person you’re proud of; he also emphasizes gratitude and social connections (friends/family).
Chapters
I thought when I finally made my first million dollars online, I'd be happy, but I wasn't. And I feel like a lot of us, especially in today's age, this consumer culture mentality, we kind of put our happiness outside of us. We think, oh, when I get this one thing, or when I achieve this goal, finally I will be happy. But that's just not how a human's brain works. It's not our happiness, how our psychology works. I mean, have you ever had a chance to play, like a video game and maybe use some cheat codes? Well, when you get everything you ever wanted in a video game, it gets boring really fast. I mean, you may experience a little bit of ecstasy for a couple of minutes, but then it gets actually depressive now that you've got it all. When I made that million bucks, that was the magic number. I thought, oh, my God, my life at that moment, the minute I get it, is going to be so different. But it wasn't. Of course, don't get me wrong, life was better with money than without it. You know, money does kind of indirectly buy happiness because it kind of gets rid of a lot of the problems and stressors and fears that you worry about. And when you eliminate that worry, you do get a bit more happy. But it wasn't like the changing point. I was not like a different person or anything by making more money. And that's when I realized how the human brain works is once we hit a certain level, you automatically want more. You know, the next thing I kind of ask myself is, okay, well, what's next? Two million, three million, what is it? Because that's kind of just how the human works. We're extremely adaptable. When you put a person in a new environment, like a new circumstance. I believe there are studies, I don't remember the exact ones, but it takes like 21 days or maybe a month to really adapt to it. So even if they put a person in prison, they kind of adapt to it over a course of a month, and that becomes their norm, right? You put a person in a millionaire's mansion, they may feel really good and enjoy it, but it kind of becomes their new normal after a month. And then you kind of always want more. So the point of this video is not to chase perfection. The point of this video is not to put your happiness 10 years ahead in the future when you achieve this immense goal, but to realize that the happiness is not going to come from the achievement of this big goal, but the happiness is rather going to come from two things the progress you're making towards that goal, like being able to wake up and look back and see, oh, I've taken a step forward, I made an extra dollar. Like that's what makes us happy, to see that progress that we make. And then second, the person that you become, you know, that's really where the happiness, the fulfillment comes from. I mean, you know, buying a Lamborghini or stupid stuff like that, I mean, yeah, that can get you pleasure, but pleasure is very fleeting. You know that real happiness comes from becoming someone you're proud to be. And that's a journey, you know, that's, that, that's a long journey and you have to go through ups and downs. But that's the fun of it. That's the good part about it. So again, the message here is don't try to put your happiness on a target that is going to take forever to hit. And then it's not really going to bring the happiness in the first place because trust me, I've been there, done it, and the magic million dollar number is not the answer to your prayers. The answer to your prayers, if happiness is what you seek, is every day having like a gratitude practice, being able to look back and see that, wow, I've made progress, that I've become a better person and that's what's going to create the lasting happiness. And then thirdly, as a little bonus tip, do not forget about your friends and family. So many entrepreneurs that I see sacrifice everything in terms to make more money. And, and again, don't get me wrong, it's better to have money than to be poor. I've been there, done that, and I'll chose, you know, being rich every single time. And I'm not saying that like I'm extremely rich, but I'm doing fine. But do not forget about your friends and family. A lot of the good times just comes from being with your friends, kicking back and having a good time. So please do not sacrifice all of that good stuff, all of that amazing social connection in pursuit of money, because I promise you, money alone will not be worth it. The answer here is to optimize these different, different compartments. You know, make sure that you get the money. I mean, it's good to have it. You can give back, you can do all these amazing things, but also make sure you look at your love, your social life, make sure that is optimized. And then just overall focus every single day on gratitude and appreciation, on how far you've come, who you're becoming. Because a combination of these things. The health, wealth, love and happiness is really what creates a life you love, not just the money alone. So I hope this was helpful. This is Peter Sabo and see you soon.
