Two partners with vastly different incomes—one makes $4,000 a month, the other $1,100—clash over whether vacations are worth the cost when they're carrying debt. One avoids conflict by withdrawing when money fights start.
I just don't feel like a good or worthy partner.
What is stopping you from changing the situation that you are in?
I don't really want to stop going on vacations.
That's an honest answer.
It feels more important that we have the experience than I have the money.
One of you has $4,000 a month to do whatever you want with. The other has $1,100. Seems like it could be a problem. I don't mind paying more.
Or some of the vacations if that money actually goes towards the debt and not towards hobbies or animals.
You're making tons of money, but you're paying minimums on debt and more is going towards pigeons than student loans.
Well, when you phrase it like that, I tend to be a very, like, conflict-avoidant person. Any time that it starts to be a conflict, I'm just like, all right, I'm done with this.
At least 7 times a week I'm like, are you mad at me? And he's like, no, I'm fine. Happy seems the same as angry. So that is the challenge.
