Netflix Reunion with Amani & Matt—Where Are They Now?

Do you have separate accounts?

We have separate accounts.

We do, yes. Okay.

Did you ever have a joint account?

In the past, when I supported us, we had a joint account.

I'm gonna check out this conversation because I've heard this like 10,000 times already. Just today.

That's the end of the conversation.

I'm just tired. It's like emotionally draining.

You fight about money, you spin about money, and then what ends up happening?

I get defensive and then I get mad.

Let me just talk to her.

Trust me, you're not doing yourself any favors by cutting it. Trust me.

So I just don't understand why she didn't understand what I mean.

And I don't understand why you're like, oh, you know, when I worked, I felt this and this and this. Well, then go work then if it's such a big deal for you. Like.

Today I have a special, special episode for you with two guests you may recognize. They are guests on my new Netflix show called how to Get Rich. That's right. If you go to Netflix right now and you search for my name, Ramit Sethi, or How to Get Rich, you are going to see my new Netflix show. And I decided it would be fun to bring them on almost a year later to talk about where they are, what has changed, and you're going to see how honest they get today. So first make sure you've watched them because you're going to have spoilers. So go to Netflix first if you haven't already watched it. Search for my name or how to Get Rich. Add to list. Make sure Netflix knows that you want to see this. Then if you've watched the show, come back and listen because here now are Matt and Amani to share what's been going on since we last talked on the show.

This is like such a, like a deja vu, but also like kind of ptsd, but like, no offense to you.

But I hope it's not ptsd. But it is surreal to see you through the screen right now.

It's just so great to see you. Actually, there are many times I'm like, what would Ramit say right now? You know.

Will Matt be joining us? Yeah.

Okay. You should.

He's not like, let's give it a minute. I want him to definitely be on. I definitely want to catch up with him.

Yeah, for sure. He was yesterday I was like, hey, you know, it's tomorrow. I don't want this to be one sided where I fill out everything, like, what happened before, you know, or so he was like, nah, I'm Good. I had enough of this stuff. I'm like, no, you're gonna. I want your side of story, too, so.

And how did he react to that? There we go. Hey, Matt.

Hello.

How's it going?

Yeah, it's going okay.

Let's get Amenie back, and I'm excited to catch up. It's nice to see you. It's been a while. First off, the last time I saw you was. I remember vividly because it was that beautiful sunset and we had spent a lot of time together. So it feels very surreal to see you after this much time. I wanted to tell you the reason that I was really excited to work with you when I first met. I thought it was so cool how honest you were with me. There was this fascinating dynamic. Amani, you were earning tons of money. Matt, you had no financial access. You don't see that that often. And you were willing to talk about it. You know, very few couples will openly argue in front of me. And what I love about it is it's real.

Well, when y' all first came, we were pretty much at each other's throats. I wouldn't say I was at her throat too much as she was at mine. She can get pretty feisty, but, I mean, yeah, you know, like, it was hard not to argue on camera. I never thought that we would be. You know, we'd be in a situation, still bickering after, you know, like, people are in front of us. I mean, I definitely understood, like, where my wife was coming from. You know, I mean, she. She goes through a lot of stress, and I don't know, I guess the way that the cards fail, you know, she. She felt some type of way, and I don't disagree with her necessarily, but, you know, I. I'm just glad that at the end, you know, we were able to communicate and talk things through. I mean, we were stressed. We were stressed.

We were already fighting, like, so much together before the show came. The show was like kind of like, what? Everything.

Oh, the last everything to the surface. Oh. I mean, it's crazy, right? People say that you'll forget that the cameras are there. They say that, and I. I never believed them, but it's true. You become in your own world, and it just shows what's actually happening. So, you know, I appreciated that you were honest. You were fighting. It was very obvious, like, from the first five minutes in the room. And then you showed that to me, which, actually, the trust that you put in me by showing me that allowed me to better understand what was really going on and I'm very thankful for that. You both allowed me to see that, even though it was tough to do it at the time. Gosh, it seems like sometimes the most important conversations we need to have are the ones that we are least likely to want to.

Yeah, for sure.

But you did it. You did it. You really opened up with a lot and it's quite amazing to see the results of that.

When I first met Matt and Amani, they started fighting. Within minutes. They almost dropped out of the show. And every time I talked to them, they seemed to actually relish fighting with each other. It's kind of like one of those old couples we know who are always sniping at each other. But Matt and Minnie are young and I have to say I'm very glad that they did not drop out. They stuck with it. They have a lot of differences in the way they communicate about money and the way they see money. You can learn more about those on the Netflix show.

Looks like you're in a different location. I don't recognize that house. Is that in a different place?

It is pretty crazy because when we were talking to you, like, it was like a five year plan for us to try to get to our dream house, our dream house in San Diego. And it was just a combination of things. I had my highest revenue year was last year.

Wow. Amazing.

This house was just like amazing. Was on a hill and a mountain and you can see like, like literally like you meet of San Diego and like even far you can see the ocean in the water. So. And he had a guest house. So I ran it by him and I was like, let's go check it out. And he was like, you're crazy. Did you see the price? And we went and like the moment like we were driving to like, it was just like we had the goosebumps. We're like, this is like our dream. Like, like in all the neighborhood looks so nice. We were like, we can't afford this, you know, like. And yeah, fast forward. We actually purchased the house. It was pretty crazy. I had to put like a lot of money down because I already had another loan. So I'm trying to sell my house that we filmed in Temecula right now. And we started Airbnb, our guest house. So that's like, okay, another income that we started getting. And that's why we made that step. To be honest, it's probably like the riskiest financial decision we made. Only two homes, trying to sell the first one using all the cash, obviously, and the Investments I worked on all last year. But the Airbnb is doing well so far as like paying half of the mortgage where it puts us back to our initial mortgage of the house, back into macula. And that was the goal. Like, we took that rescue decision knowing, like, we can get there where we might end up being in the same amount as, like, you know, our previous house. But now we are in San Diego and yeah, it's our second month right now in the house, Matt, Would you say so?

Yeah.

Yeah, it is.

Wow.

So this is amazing because I remember, Amenie, that one of your dreams was to live by the beach. And Matt, I remember you telling me that you wanted to be more outdoors.

Combination of both, mountain house with some sort of water view.

So that's kind of amazing. And you did it in about a year.

Two things I want to point out. Number one, it's possible to live your rich life a lot faster than you think. I don't like hearing someone say, someday I want to take a trip to Spain.

I'm like, what?

Let's get specific. How long do you want to go for?

What season?

What do you want to do there?

What are you going to eat? That is important and you can achieve that much faster than you think if you put a plan down and become intentional.

The other question I ask him is.

How much do you think it's going to cost? You know, most of us have never actually calculated what our dreams would cost us. A lot of times it's less than you think. Sometimes it's more than you think, which is also fine because it gives you a reason to make financial changes. Number two, I also want to make sure that they can afford it. Wanting a new house or extravagant trips or clothes or whatever is one thing, but you've got to make sure you can actually afford it. Now listen to Amenie talk about it.

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E.Com I had to take a risk. Like I said, it was the rescuest decision I'd ever take because I almost basically emptied that cash. But it's not gone because now it's in the house equity. When I was doing your spreadsheet, I love, by the way, the new version. So that first table, when I was putting our asset, like the value of our houses and the car and all that, I was like, what?

I.

500K? What the hell? And it was like, like I was like, you don't guess our net worth. Like that felt great. And again it was like, you know, validation that it's not about how much money in the bank that you have. If you go and put that money towards something else, it's there still, you know. So yeah, it's my first risky decision. So we'll see. I mean right now I would say as much as like we have learned a lot and we're taking a lot of new experiences. It is our, actually I would say my, our most vulnerable financial situation right now. Because I own two houses. Not by choice, you know, it's a market that, that's why I was too scared of investing like real estate, stocks, all that like to me is like gambling, you know, it's like up and down kind of market and when you take a risk, you know, that comes with consequences. Our house has been in the market like since January. We haven't got like any offers and that's like stressing me out because I don't have that much left in my bank account. I have to think, okay, how many months can I go by paying two mortgages and then I have to.

And what's the answer? How long can you go?

I right now have budgeted for like, three more months. And then after that, I'll bleed out. Like, I don't want to start taking out, like, what, what you say if you start cashing your stocks and you.

Feel like, oh, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. We got to fix this right now. Hold on.

This is crazy.

So it's interesting what you say. On one hand, you feel the most successful and in control you've ever felt.

On the other hand, you feel the most vulnerable.

Absolutely.

Okay.

It was very risky. Like, just even me talking about it with my friends, like, their answer was, did you really have to get this house? You know, you could have waited until you sold your Temecula home and you would have found another beautiful home. But, like, for me, was. It was hard for me to find in the market a house with a guest house. So I felt like I had to make the move and take that risky decision of having two mortgages. But now here I am. I got greedy. Four months into this, my new mortgage is going to hit, and I'm like, this is the worst case scenario I was. I was scared of. That's why I'm like. Because I. I can already tell in like, one minute how worse it can get, which is like, oh, my gosh, I don't make enough money to support all this. I'm going to start cashing in my stocks. Then what? I'm going to go cash in my last. Then what?

Okay, this is an interesting scenario. They have three months of cash left, which is way, way too risky for me.

But they also have a very high.

Income and now multiple income streams. I kind of love these unusual financial situations. Let me give you my take. I think this is really risky, and they need to get rid of their old house right away.

The fact is, they're going to sell.

It for a lot less than they thought.

That's life.

Second, their scenario isn't really that bad if they act fast. And this is uncomfortable to hear for a lot of people, but the truth is that a high income solves a lot of financial problems. Not all of them, because you and I have heard many guests who have high incomes and spend every last cent they make. But having a high income solves a lot of financial problems. My dream for Matt and Amani would be that they sell the house fast, even taking a loss. They set up a rule so they never get this close to running out of money again. And then they begin having more Open conversations together where both of them have full access to the money and they share responsibility. That's what I would do. That's my dream for them.

That was, like, a big part that of the show. That was, like, I didn't get an answer for intellectually now, which is Matt wanted, like, I wanted to push Matt to do a type of job that I do, which is corporate and things like that and climbing ladder and. And he wanted to, like, run his own business. And I was like, oh, I don't want to fund that business for you, and it's too risky. And, you know, you don't want to learn from somebody. You want to be your own boss. But I think the problem was he didn't find that thing that was making, you know, that could be his passion. And I've seen him thrive so much managing the Airbnb. And, you know, like, people love him. He's great with people on customer service. He really goes above and beyond, like, little things like, you know, cookies for the guest, things like that. And he would go down and clean it like, you know, like no other. Like, he was really, like, working hard on this Airbnb like his own baby. And I see now what he was asking for before, like, running his own business. Like, I just had a different concept of that. And I think he's thriving, he's good at it, and I want to be able to support him more toward that direction.

Wow.

Yeah. I feel like we kind of found something that. That, like, I'm comfortable with and he's thriving in for sure.

It seemed before when we talked, at least early on, that there was this kind of, like, push and pull. Amenie, you were saying, like, I want.

You to do it this.

I want you to do it my way.

And now, like, that's just me.

Yeah. Yeah. Do it on my timetable, my way. And Matt was like, no, I'm not.

Going to do that.

Yeah. Yeah. Fair to say. Matt, what do you think?

Fair.

Okay. And so now you change the structure. That seems to have really changed a lot of the dynamic. That's outstanding.

Managing the Airbnb has been, I don't know, it's kind of delightful. You know, I kind of enjoy it.

What do you like about it?

My wife respects it, you know, like, she'll actually leave me be and let me do the things that I need to do for it because she sees her focus is on, you know, like, the end result.

That's awesome.

Just opened the Airbnb and we booked all month except two days, and it's like 3,600 revenue on, like, a small loft. It just has like a really pretty view. And everyone says in the reviews that the host goes above and beyond. You know, the place is so clean and, and, and he's so thoughtful. Like, I can see his personality, like, being put in the job as being a host. And, and I said it before, like, I didn't feel like I could trust him to like, you know, like to have a big investment in like, some sort of business he does. But something like this, I could see already, you know, the, the result. I, I don't think I could have juggled my job and doing this. I tried to do it all, but it was one of the things where I had to trust him to do it because I just, I just couldn't fit everything in my schedule. And, and I, and I want to, I want to help him thrive more like that's my next goal financially. I'm trying to save for and invest more so we can have another Airbnb property.

Amani hasn't trusted Matt for a long time. It sounds like she's made progress, but as I dig in, I can tell that it's still a very real issue.

So since that time, you know, if you recall, we pulled out all those bills and we were looking through all that, I still remember on the table, we're looking through all this stuff and all that paperwork. What habits have stuck since we first met and worked together?

I'm far from like, being, you know, perfect with managing my money, but I would say the me now is all things more like long term versus in the moment. In the past, I was always thinking, like, I just want to live my life, you know, you only live once. Like, I was focused on, like, spending that money to create joy versus now. It's more like kind of in the middle, you know, where. Yeah, there is that 20, 30 that we discussed where you can go, spend, do whatever you want. But also I'm thinking about, like, our future as a family, my kids, things like that. On, like, I'm, I'm working hard on providing them a nice life, but I want to make sure it's like, sustainable, sustainable long term. So I'm always thinking about, like, what can I do to invest my money better? What are other people doing to get additional income, things like that. So, like, now I'm more like hustler mentality, which I never thought I would be because I'm, I'm afraid of taking risk, you know? You know, like, there's, there are questions that you always ask, like, well, what do you think Matt feels about this? Because, you know, being empathetic, I feel like that's something that is really good at. So I always try to think, like, even when I'm on my own, you know, how would he feel about this? As a big example, when he was talking right now in the call, how, you know, he. He's, like, there for me, like, as a listener when I'm going through some stress, like, it made me think, okay, well, if he's my rock, then who's his rock? You know, Some. I try to do more of that for him, even though, like, it's hard for me to even, like, have it together for myself, you know, because if he has nobody, then he can't be my rock. It's kind of like a vicious circle, right? So I'm not. I'm not, like, perfect diet. I'm better at it. I'm definitely not where I want to be. But, you know, I'm working on it.

Okay.

I like it.

All right.

And, Matt, what about you? What habits have stuck with you since we met?

What was it?

Quicksand. Oh, yeah. You remember that?

That's right.

Because, like, I don't know. I guess. I guess when y' all first came, I felt like I was at the point where, you know, like, walking away just. Just wasn'. You know, wasn't what I was supposed to do anymore. I guess I just forgot it. But, yeah, you know, like, sometimes. Sometimes just, you know, give. Bringing it to her attention, you know, like, hey, you know, like, you're being a little rough on me, and, you know, let's calm down. Let's go do something else, you know, like, at least. At least it's good communication.

Yeah, that's cool. I'm glad to hear that word, quicksand. It's been a while. I'm really glad. You know what? You need tools sometimes to be able to say, hey, I'm overwhelmed right now, or, I need a second, or I'm. I know we want to talk about this, but I'm not in the place to do it.

Right, Right.

And whether it's quicksand or whatever term works for you, that's fantastic.

On the Netflix show, you'll remember that they were fighting so much, I finally.

Gave them a tool to be able.

To cool down and step away from a fight. By the way, this happened on the first conversation where I met them. I asked them to come up with a word that would instantly signal that one of them needed time to think. And they Chose quicksand, as in, we're sinking in quicksand and I want to take a break. This is a great lesson. You can adapt for your own life, whether you are solo or in a relationship. If you find yourself spinning or catastrophizing or fighting, you can literally call it.

Out with a word.

Some guests on my show have done this. They've identified with an angel and a.

Devil on their shoulder and they say.

I'm not going to listen to you right now, Mr. Devil. Others use words like quicksand.

You choose.

And if you want more techniques like this, this is where a skilled cognitive behavioral therapist can help you ongoing.

Okay, now the opposite question. Where are you still stuck? So it might be, you know, I'm sure there's some detailed questions and I definitely want to talk about those. But bigger picture, where do you feel stuck still?

Well, I. I'm better now at managing money than I was before the show, but I'm not where I want to be for sure. You know, like, kind of like I was telling you, like, you know, how I'm stressed out right now about some things financially and me learning, like, you know, how to better invest. I feel like there is more potential for Matt to have more income than just the Airbnb. I believe that he could do, like, what I'm doing, where he can have like a full time job where we can add even more income, you know, 100k plus that will allow us maybe to invest in more properties or whatever, while he could still be a property manager. Like, I want him to be there to get out of his comfort zone and be able to juggle both like, you know, a career and I guess being, you know, his own boss, you know, I'm saying I think there too. And as far as, like our relationship, like, we're not there 100% as far as managing money together, like, we still don't share accounts. I feel like that's something like that we need to like, still work on. And like, that's the part it's. We're still like, not there yet.

I appreciate the honesty on all of those. Some of those are about you, some of those are feelings or attitudes towards Matt. And then some of them are together. Why don't you have joint accounts?

I mean, as she said, you know, like she's still hesitant on turning any financial responsibility over. So I don't even manage the finances of the Airbnb that I manage.

So that was the recurring thing, right? Because when you wrote me, you said that you had no access to the family financials. And would you say you have access now?

I've been told I have still have zero access.

You've been told by whom?

By my wife.

You're not quite sure if you should trust him yet, and we're talking about Matt, who is the father of two children.

Not, like, trusting him. It's more. I want to. You know how with the Airbnb thing happened, like, where he showed his value and I, like, I fully trust him, right? Then I always do, like, a testing, right? So I was like, okay, what you would do with a credit card that.

Would you want to test it?

It's not enough to, like, obviously cover, like, a lot of the bills. It's just for now, just paying the mortgage and whatever, you know, leftover for himself. So that's why I'm saying we're not there. There's so much more room to grow.

I want to offer you another tool like I offered you quicksand when I was with you. So when you're at work, you've got these different coworkers. I'm guessing that you don't test them, all, right? I'm guessing that you assume positive intent and you give them anything they ask for. And then if maybe if they mess up, you're like, okay, I'm not going to deal with that person.

Trust me. I had to learn that. When I started working, like, out of college in corporate America, that was a huge slap in the face because delegating was one of my weaknesses, right? And I was like, I can't do it all. I was working until midnight. I was like, I'm burning out. I have to trust my team and my people. And honestly, like, it's great, you know, Like, I thrive more that I trust them. I still kind of like, you know, be a quarterback and manage to make sure that everything is on track. And I just can't seem to copy and paste that in my personal life yet, which is weird.

Well, let's try it. Let's try it. Okay, that's good. You see that? I appreciate that.

This is what I mean when I say trust is still an issue. Look, personally, I completely disagree with Ameni, but me telling her she's wrong will not do anything. I noticed she's made some steps, which is a great sign. What I'm trying to do here is to create analogies so she can make the connection herself. That's because she has to get it. She has to realize the cost of what she's doing and also see that when she trusts Matt he can deliver. Of course, Matt plays a role in this, too. The communication could be improved in a big way. Now, with all of that said, considering they now own two houses with Airbnb Income and they have two kids, and.

I think it's crazy that he has.

No access to the family financials. You cannot have a partner if you treat them like a child. The good news is they're making steps, and all of this could change step by step if they make the decision to do it.

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Oh, wait, go ahead.

What's that?

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I T. Seriously, looking at these numbers and with your income and the Airbnb income and the potential house income, you could be in a stellar position. Yeah, stellar.

The weakest we've been. I see the potential. It's just, first I gotta get rid of the other house. That's like my. The biggest drag going on for me right now.

Everything else falls from that. Get rid of that house. Do not let the tail wag the dog. Just get rid of it. Even if you have to take way less than you thought, it's okay. You know, there's this phrase that we use, which is that your future is bigger than your past. And when I was going to make some tough decisions in my business, I kept saying, well, I. Oh, I already worked so hard, and I don't want to have to start again and this and that and What I realized is I've got 40 years plus ahead of me, so why am I letting this three years behind me dictate the rest of my life? Your future together is bigger than your past. You can't have a successful marriage if you're constantly playing with one hand behind your back. Maybe a successful marriage is about going all in. We made this decision together.

We had children together.

We live together. Maybe it's about assuming that things are going to go right and also having the confidence to know that we can handle it if things go wrong. That's how I would look at it. And once you have that, you're going to know exactly what to do. And, hey, send me an email when you sell your house. I'm, like, waiting.

So happy.

I cannot wait. Amen. You asked about my texting me. If you have questions, let me give you my number right now. You can text anytime. Matt, feel free to text anytime as well with any questions. So let me give you this number. You know, if you have questions that come up, we spent so much time together. Of course I'll be happy to answer them. So just text me anytime. All right. Honestly, that was awesome to catch up with Matt and Amani. I haven't seen them since the last scene, the last time we filmed. And just to see the two of them smiling and talking is completely different than the first time I met them. And I remember they were actually the first couple, the first day, who I shot with. And I remember sitting on their couch and they were arguing in front, and I was like, this really happening. It's really different than seeing in my office and doing my podcast. So I just want to reflect on a few lessons that I took away from Matt and Amani. First off, I see lots of better communication. You know, they're actually talking to each other. They're asking questions. Now, of course, they have work to do. I think Amani can delegate a little bit more effectively. She can assume positive intent. I think Matt can be more specific with what. What he wants and why. And I think both of them can create a vision together. That's really what's lacking in Matamania. And many couples, in fact, almost no couples, have a joint, rich life vision. But that can be fixed, right? They have a vision. What do we want to do? Date night? And they've started to get little elements of that. I want more for them. The second lesson is that having a high income actually does solve most financial problems, but not all. I want to emphasize this. A lot of times, you know, when you look at people with financial problems, one of the most obvious things is that there's a limit to how much you can cut, but no limit to how much you can earn. And if you're making $35,000 a year, it's going to be very, very difficult to get ahead.

And.

And that's why I'm such a fan of more affordable housing and affordable health care and all those things. But at a certain point, like I said, there's just a limit to how much you can cut. In this case, Amani has a very high income, hundreds of thousands of dollars, and she's young, so incredible in her career. That helps a lot. And the fact that Matt is now generating income through that Airbnb and managing it, also fantastic. The problem is they have not adjusted their spending. Okay. And as Amania admitted, she goes, well, I never thought I'd be making this much and having these kinds of problems. They need to tighten this up. And that brings me to my third point, which is they have to become intentional with their money. A lot of the things that I see happening are something in front of Matt and Amani, and then they jump on it, like, oh, we saw this house. We should buy it. Oh, we got to sell this house. We should sell it. Credit card debt, 401k, et cetera. It's like jumping from one thing to another. It's financial whack, a mole. And what I encouraged them to do was like, when you break glass in the kitchen by dropping something, you just stop, freeze, make a plan before you take your next step. That's exactly what I want for them, because we have a lot of numbers floating around. Hundreds of thousands of dollars, even millions in the long term. And what I would like for them to do is to become much more intentional. Here's the percentage we're going to be putting towards X, towards.

Towards why.

Here's how many vacations we're going to take. If I make more than I projected in the conscious spending plan, I'm going to take 75% and put it towards investments and 25% and use it for fun. That's the level of intentionality I want. Now, whether or not you're making $350,000 a year or whether you're making $100,000 a year or 40k, you can use those same principles. Better communication, increasing your income by negotiating your salary or starting a side business or getting more intentional with your money. I really enjoyed talking to them. And as I mentioned to them, they were so honest. I mean, they were arguing they were telling me how they felt. Amania was telling me about her childhood, so was Matt. And to be able to reconnect with them.

Just.

It feels awesome to see that. So, Matt Mania, I want to thank you for coming on the show and.

Sharing your follow up story with all of us.

And I want to encourage you to watch Matt Anan's full story. It's actually unbelievable when you see it on my Netflix show, How to Get Rich.

Sam.