Talking Too Fast During Job Interviews, with Ramit Sethi
Ramit Sethi coaches a job-seeker on slowing down during interviews. Speaking fast signals uncertainty; high-status people speak slowly and deliberately. Slowing to 50% speed and adding pauses transforms how you come across.
Chapters
Compare the difference between a 22 year old who's just got their first job out of college with the President of the United States. What's the difference in their communication styles? Just think about it for a second. The President is going to speak much, much slower. Every word he says is full of meaning and no one would dare interrupt him. Versus the 22 year old who doesn't know what they're saying. They're going to talk really, really fast. They're not sure. Oh my God. What do you think? Do I think? You look fine. They're talking so fast and oftentimes rambling and people look at them and they say, all right, you can almost guess how old someone is by how fast they talk. It's a huge red flag when you're trying to communicate and convey experience. If you're busy talking this fast a million miles an hour. So I brought one of my students into studio and you'll quickly discover as I did, that they were talking way, way too fast. Watch the before and after. Watch what happens as they walk in and they're speaking at a million miles an hour. And watch what happens after. I do a little bit of tweaking and notice the difference in how powerful their communication is. Take a look. Alright, so what we're going to do today is we're going to do some role plays.
Great.
Alright. And then we're going to analyze what you did and how you could maybe improve them. Do you have a couple of stories from your story toolbox? Like any interesting things you could share?
Yes.
You do?
Yeah.
Just give me the quick like one sentence description of a story.
Okay. Well, when I was applying for a job before dream job course, I had emailed the hiring manager and when I came to the phone interview before. Sorry, let me back up. When I was emailing back and forth, we had developed a great relationship. It seemed like it was going very well. But then when it came to the phone interview, I kind of got really nervous and I was rambling on. I just knew that it didn't go well.
Great.
Yeah.
All right, so I want you to tell me this story and I'm going to set up a little scenario.
Okay.
Let's pretend that actually let's just make it this situation. You came here for some career advice. You trust me and I asked you to share a story about a time when something didn't go the way you planned it. Okay? So why don't you share that story with me?
Okay. So I saw this dream job posting on one of the job posting Websites. And when I applied to it, I spent so much time trying to tailor my resume and make sure that my cover letter was very appealing. And when I had been talking to the hiring manager through email, I know I made her laugh, and it was a very good relationship. And when it came time for the phone interview, I was so confident and I was ready because of the email exchange that we had done. But when it came to the phone interview, I started to ramble and I wasn't doing so well. And I knew that she was tuning out. And I knew from there that I had lost the job and that it was over. And.
Yeah, great pause there. Okay, how did you feel about that story?
It was okay.
Okay, tell me more.
I think it started off with a great start, and then after a while, I kind of just went. Went downhill.
Okay, and do you remember how you ended it?
I said, yeah, I'm so bad at that. Yeah, I recognize that.
We're gonna talk about that. It's good that you know it.
Okay.
Most people don't even know that they're terrible ending stories. I was horrible at it until I actually got media training one time, and this was because I asked my publisher to pay for it. And it was miraculous. They forced me to go on camera, and they taught me how to convey key messages very succinctly. And at the end, we spent hours watching me on video. And then we did it again and again and again. And I learned how to take. You know, I can stretch a story out for five minutes, or I can compress it to 30 seconds. But one thing I learned is how to end that story. Like, with that kind of concision, with that kind of focus, instead of saying, so, yeah, which is something we all struggle with. Okay, I want you to tell me the same story, but I want you to slow it down by 50%. Okay, so just to show you an example, instead of me going and telling a story about how I went to the store and talked like this, I'm going to tell a story about how I went to the store and I talked like this. Okay, same thing, same story, everything the same. 50%. Slower.
Okay, so I found my dream job on a job posting website. And I was super excited about it. It was everything I wanted. It was in the food industry.
Stop, you're going too fast.
Damn.
Try it again. 50% is really slow. Try it again.
Okay. I found my dream job on a job posting website. And I was really excited because it was everything that I ever wanted in an industry that I loved. And with a Company that had a great product. When I applied for the job, everything went well. I was emailing the hiring manager back and forth. She seemed to really like me. I really opened up to her, and we had a great conversation. Finally, when it was time to go into the phone interview, I was so nervous. I had rambled on. I had put that company on a pedestal. And because of that, I got really nervous and. And kind of really lost the interview that way.
How'd you feel about that one?
Much better.
Why?
Because I ended it better.
Yes, you did.
And it was slower. It was slower.
Way slower. Did it feel weird to you?
A little at first, because I'm used to talking fast, but yeah.
So Basically, the number one challenge for you, which I've discovered in 0.5 seconds of talking to you, is you talk really fast.
Yeah.
And that's fine when you're with your friends. Yeah. But if you study people who speak with high competence triggers, men in particular. Watch the president speak. Watch any athletes speak. Actors. They speak extremely slowly. Why? Because I know if I have high status, you're gonna listen to me for as long as it takes.
Right.
And by the way, I can speed up my conversation when I need to, but other times, I'm happy to take my time.
See what I mean? Got it. Yeah.
You're listening to every single word I'm saying because it's impactful. And one other thing. When I'm speaking this slowly, it gives me time to plan the. The next 10 sentences in my head.
Right.
Okay.
Got it.
You were able to do a way better job with that. When I first started speaking much more slowly and intentionally, it felt fake. What am I doing here? As if there's a traffic jam in my brain going out of my mouth. All these things, I want to get them out, but I started watching the reactions, and people actually do react better when you speak in a slow, intentional way because they can't keep up with you. You speak very quickly.
Right.
And it just loses its impact. So I want you, from now on, right now, starting now, to focus on speaking more slowly and more intentionally. Telling someone to just slow down doesn't really change behavior. One thing you can do is explain the why. And now if you go on YouTube, for example, one thing I like to recommend is go on YouTube or look at the Today show website and watch the Today show videos. If there's Matt Lauer or somebody interviewing someone, these are pros, right?
Right.
They speak very, very intentionally. Now, sometimes they'll speed it up because they got a 15 second segment, but they're always very crisp and clear in how they communicate.
