Ramit Sethi shows Chris how his vague, hesitant phrasing makes agreement sound like disagreement. When Chris says things like "I agree... if... what?" instead of stating his position clearly, his partner Gabriella hears doubt even when he means to support her. The delivery matters as much as the words.
What in the hell is happening? Chris, why are you overcomplicating this? I'm getting so frustrated just listening to you. Do you know what you are saying right now?
Yeah.
What are you saying to her in one sentence?
I agree with you and I'm prepared to make that my reality. I mean, if— What? Make what? Be specific. So if Gabby's the primary breadwinner and if she requires me to be home on the weekends and she needs certain things for me to accommodate, I'm happy to do that.
You are not communicating effectively, Chris, because you were actually just agreeing with Gabriella, and it was so frustrating the way that you were presenting it that even I got frustrated, and I do this for a living. Do you see the problem that even when you are agreeing and you're saying like, yeah, I'm willing to stay home on the weekends, that it comes across like you are disagreeing? That's a major problem.
