Ramit Sethi argues that calling weddings, nails, and massages "frivolous" while accepting man caves and trucks as normal reveals a gender bias in how we judge spending. He questions the invisible scripts that make feminine purchases seem wasteful.
Frivolous in America is something that is coded as feminine. For example, weddings are often talked about as being frivolous. Nails frivolous, getting a massage frivolous. And yet men's interests, such as building a man cave or having a big ass truck, you would simply never hear that described as frivolous. And what is the most frivolous expense of all in American culture, at least the way it's talked about weddings? What I really want you to do is to start to question these beliefs that we invisibly accept. They're so deeply held. I call them invisible scripts. For example, I spent a lot of money on our wedding. I loved it. I don't think it was frivolous. I think it was some of the best money that I ever saved for it and that we, my wife and I, and our entire families got to experience. So just because you think something is frivolous, think deeper. Ask yourself why you are using that word and ask if you would use that same word to describe some of your male coded purchases.
