Unraveling the Mystery of Extraordinary Skills

Have you ever heard someone play a musical instrument and you sat there and thought to yourself, wow, they are really talented? Well, I have news for you. If you were to talk to that person that played the piano so amazingly or the guitar so fantastically, or whatever instrument it was that they played that impressed you so much, if you could talk to them personally, they would say, I'm not talented at all. I have spent a long, long time working at this. I have come to believe that real talent is 5% inspiration and 95% perspiration.

Welcome to Becoming Wiser with Dr. Robert A. Rohm, author and world renowned public speaker, as he shares stories involving his experiences and lessons learned in a good, spirited, positive and fun way. Here's Dr. Robert A. Rome. Hi, I'm Dr. Robert Rome. And what we're going to do today is put on our big boy pants, put on our big girl pants, and think about something that can really move you ahead in life. Someone once said that if it were simple, everybody would do it. And that could be applied to just about any situation. I mean, the reason gold is valuable is you have to dig for it. Nobody goes outside and just picks up rocks at random and takes them in their house and stores them because they're so valuable. I mean, they're everywhere. Our driveway has thousands of rocks in it. I'm not outside picking up those rocks. But all of a sudden, if we start digging and we hit gold, well, now that's going to be a different situation. But that requires effort and work and time and discipline and machinery and know how. What I want to say to you today is that let me coach you if I could. Just, if you don't mind. Not in an arrogant way, not in a know it all way, not in a I'm smarter than you or better than you way. No, no, no, no, no. None of that. But just as someone who's down the road, I'll be 74 very, very soon. Let me share with you, as a coach.

Some things that are going to have to take place in your life. If you really want to have a great life, if you want to have a successful life, if you want to have a life that you are proud of, it's going to require some change. It's going to require some effort. And I'm going to share with you in this particular podcast how to do that. I wish someone had shared with me what I'm sharing with you today, many, many years ago. And I hope I can do it in a way again that doesn't sound arrogant. Or boastful or know it all. But just as someone who's down the road a little further, that can give you some key insights to help you rearrange your thinking. So let's get started. One baseball player who's one of my all time favorites is Yogi Berra. Many of you remember Yogi. He was the catcher, number eight for the New York Yankees. And Yogi has all kinds of crazy things that he used to say. One time he was heard saying, if you don't go to other people's funerals, they won't come to yours. Well, you just have to think about that a little, little bit. One time, Mickey Mantle hit a home run right handed. And in the same game later, he hit a home run left handed. The people in the dugout were sitting there talking, saying, wow, he is really a great player. He's one of the greatest players of all time. Yogi Berra spoke up and said, well, he ought to be. He's amphibious. They all laughed. I think he meant ambidextrous. Yogi always was off a little bit in some of the things he said. One thing that he said that I thought was really great, and this is pertaining to what we're talking about today, hard work ain't easy.

I hope you'll think about that. I hope you smile, but I hope you digest that. It's the truth. Hard work ain't easy. That's why it's called hard work. You see, getting back to how we started today, if someone plays the piano, and I mean they can tickle those 88 keys and they can just tear that piano up from one end to the other and play just about anything you can imagine. It's because they did two things. They put forth some effort and they practiced. Now, I hope you'll, if you're taking notes or if you'll listen, we all remember E.T. the movie E.T. phone Home. Many of us remember that. Well, this is ep. You can remember it causes the same initials as Elvis Presley. EP Effort.

And practice. Even Elvis Presley spent a lot of time putting forth effort and practiced and practiced and practiced and practiced. His shows did not just magically happen. He had to practice and practice and spend time developing how he wanted things to look and sound. Whether it's a singer like Elvis or a piano player, like so many famous piano players of the past. And I want to be careful not to start naming names because everybody has a favorite. But I promise you, whether it's the cello, the flute, the violin, or 101 other instruments.

It required two things, effort and practice. The effort part may be the inspiration. It felt like something they were good at or they were talented at, or they felt like, I'd like to do that. So they put forth some effort. But they soon found out the perspiration was what practice was all about. Over and over and over and over. I'm sure you've heard that if you spend four or five hours a week on a project, that begins to add up and then you have think about this. I'm going to do a little math. Let's just say five hours a week, that's an hour a day, okay? Not even seven days a week, just maybe five days a week. That's five hours, okay? You put in five hours a week in any project and you do that not even all year, but just for 50 weeks. Okay? That's 250 hours.

Of something that you have learned. Let's say you really, really, really want to know it well. So you put in two hours.

A day for five days. That's 10 hours, 10 hours a week. And you don't even do it for 52 weeks, you just do it for 50. That's 500 hours. I'm just trying to show you how putting in one to two hours can be between 250 and 500 hours in one year. Now think about doing that for two years or three years, or five years or 10 years. I promise you, if you do not know how to do something now, but you get started and you learn a little bit, little bit. Little bit, little bit, little bit more, you're going to get better at it. Are you aware. Now listen carefully. This is some good stuff. Are you aware that you were born knowing absolutely nothing? Anything you know right now, you've had to learn it. You had to learn how to crawl, you had to learn how to walk, you had to learn how to eat, feed yourself, you had to learn how to. There's a time in your life, you had to learn how to dress yourself, you had to brush your teeth. Everything you know, everything you know, don't miss it. Everything you know, you have to learn. Now, I realize if you're younger and you're looking at those of us who are a little bit older, you probably think, oh, you're just good at that, or. Or are you just very talented at that? And again, I'm coaching you. That's not true. A person who has become an expert at something or is really, really good at something is because they spent a lot of time, effort, practice, energy, learning how to do it. And you can't go from I don't know how to do that to I'm an expert in that overnight. Now, let me give you a couple of examples as we begin to think about this and head towards giving you some great new insight into how to have a PMA positive mental attitude. Let's suppose many of you are in school and you're listening this today. If you're still of school age, I want you to understand something. School is about three things. Whatever class you're in, whatever it is you're learning, three things have to take place. Number one, you have to learn some new vocabulary. You have to learn some new vocabulary words. If you're taking a math class, if you're taking a history class, if you're taking a science class, you're going to have to learn some new words that you're not familiar with. So. So just recognize at the outset, well, I don't know what those words mean. Well, you can look them up. There are people who understand incredible amounts of linguistic words. They had to learn how to do it because nobody knows everything to start with. So the first thing is you have to learn a simple example in geometry. I remember in high school in geometry, the teacher said, today we're going to begin learning theorems. I had no idea what a theorem was, but I was afraid to raise my hand and ask, theorem, theorem, what in the world is a theorem? I know what a theory is, but I was afraid to ask. I should have back in those days. I'm not afraid anymore. But growing up, you know, somebody might laugh at us or we might get a bad grade. I didn't know what a theorem was. I had to learn some new vocabulary words. The second thing, if you're in school or if you're studying any topic, you're not only going to have to learn some new vocabulary words, you're going to have to learn some new systems. Some new systems. How does this work? How can I understand this better? It doesn't matter if you're learning a language, if you're learning geometry, if you're learning calculus, if you're learning English grammar, if you're learning anything, there's some systems that have to be in place. And if you're in school, your teachers have different systems. Some require a test every Friday, some require a midterm and a final. Some require no test, just a term paper. I have a friend, his name's Frank. Frank went to Auburn University. Some of you know Auburn University in Auburn, Alabama. Frank was telling me he Said, I went to class one day, the professor walked in and he said, before we start, you need to understand my attendance policy. If you miss one of my classes, I will fail you. I come to class, you come to class, miss one of my classes, you will get an F. You will not pass. And then he began to teach. The second time he came to class, he said, before we start, I want to explain to you my policy concerning class attendance. If I'm here, you have to be here. But if I'm not here, you. And 15 minutes past the hour comes, y' all can all get up and leave because I'm not coming. And all of that will be an excused absence. The third time he came to class, he said, before I start, let me explain to you what class attendance, the requirements. I don't care if you come or not. I don't care if you live or die. If you want to come to my class, come. If you don't, don't. I don't care. The next time he came to class, he said, let me explain to you class attendance. You can have three unexcused absences, and that's all. If you have a fourth unexcused absence, you will fail. The next time he came to class. You get the idea. Every time he came to class, he had a different policy concerning attendance. Frank told me nobody missed his class but the whole semester because we didn't know what the attendance policy was. And the last day of school, he said, by the way, have y' all noticed? This is so cool, too. I love stories like this. Frank said, the last day of class, he said, did y' all notice that I spent the entire semester changing the attendance policy every class? That was my methodology for getting y' all to come to class. Now, that's ingenious. That's just ingenious to me. I mean, the guy in my book gets a red star. Can you imagine how many different methodologies he had to come up with? He had to put forth, Are you ready? Some effort. And he had to practice this game he played with his class. Frank said it was one of the best classes in my whole experience at Auburn University. He said, I don't remember that much about what I learned, but I'll never forget. I. I need to get there so I can find out what the attendance policy is. The first thing, you're going to have to learn some new vocabulary words. The second, you're going to have to learn some systems. And here we go. The third thing, and we've talked about this in Other podcasts. And if you haven't heard them, you need to listen to the training I provide on personality information. You need to understand. If you have a D type teacher, they want results. If you have an I type, an inspiring type teacher, they want some recognition. If you have a S type, a supportive type teacher, you need to have some rec, some relationship with them. And if you have a C cautious type, then you need to have to be right. They focus on doing things right or correct. So remember again, all four of those personalities, the dominant, the inspiring, the supportive and cautious, and we have whole trainings on each one of those because the personality style of whoever you're dealing with is important. So learning how to put forth effort and to have practice in whatever you do requires learning some new skill sets, putting in some practice, putting forth the effort. From 1971 to 1981, I spent 10 years after I graduated from college, 10 years working. From 1971 to 1981, 10 years after I graduated from college, I was burned out. I had been a school teacher and I had been a school principal, and I did that for 10 years. And in 1981, I was just fried. And I didn't really want to keep doing what I was doing. I School works hard, being a teacher, but being a school principal is really challenging. And I was still young. I was 32 years old by that time. I just wanted to do something different. Are you ready for this? I lived in Atlanta, Georgia. I packed up a pregnant wife and three small children and moved to Dallas, Texas, where I furthered my education, graduated from two other colleges in universities. But. And it was hard. It was hard. Listen carefully. I'm not bragging. I'm showing you. I have put my feet where my mouth is. Moving to Dallas with a pregnant wife and three children was hard. We had to move across country, almost 800 miles from Atlanta to Dallas. Can I tell you something, friend? That took a lot of effort and it took a lot of practice to go to school every day and kind of start my life over. But it was through that that I met Zig Ziglar. It was through that that I met some of the most wonderful people in my whole life. That everything changed for the better. If I have gotten good at being a motivational speaker and trainer and teacher, it's because I had to put forth some effort. I had to put some effort in my feet. Anybody can talk about anything, but putting forth effort and practice is important. Just know this. Success is a journey. It's not a destination. Doing the work is more important than the outcome. Do you hear me? Doing the work is more important than the outcome. Because if you do the work, the outcome will come as a byproduct of doing the work. One more quick story as we wrap our time up together. One of my favorite people that I have read and studied is a medical doctor. His name, Scott Peck. Scott Peck has passed away now. He wrote a book called the Road Less Traveled back in the early 70s. It sold over 5 million copies. Not a bad print run. He wrote a second book that I think is one of the best books I've ever read in my life, called Further along the Road Less Traveled, where he began as a psychiatrist to analyze what life is all about. In that book, he says, life is all about two things, learning and growing. He says, as long as you're learning and growing, you're doing what life was designed to teach you to do well. He tells the story in one of his chapters. He tells the story about his lawnmower breaking. He's cutting the grass and his lawnmower breaks. So he pushes it to his next door neighbor and he says, hey, I know you're good at fixing things. He said, can you take a look at my lawnmower? Dr. Scott Peck said, we picked the lawnmower up, we put it on his workbench. He said, my neighbor began to take it apart. He began to find out what was wrong with it and fix it. And then it happened. Scott Peck said, I looked at my neighbor and said, I've never been very good at fixing things like this. His neighbor said.

Excuse me, aren't you a psychiatrist? And Dr. Peck said, yes. He said, how long have you been lying to yourself about that?

Friends, when's the last time you said to a psychiatrist, how long have you been lying to yourself about that? Scott Peck said, it caught him off guard. He said, what are you talking about?

He said, you just told me I'm not very good at fixing lawnmowers. Is that what you just said to me? Scott Peck said, well, I'm not.

His neighbor said, do you know why you're not very good at fixing lawnmowers? You've never taken the time to learn how to fix a lawnmower. If you can graduate from medical school and become a medical doctor, I want you to know something. I believe with all my heart you can learn to fix a lawnmower. Now, you see, that's what this whole podcast has been about. Scott Peck said, I was shocked. I thought I have been lying to myself. He said, you know why I don't know how to fix the lawnmower. I've never taken the time to learn, but if I can get through medical school, I could probably learn how to fix a lawnmower, he said. That conversation opened my eyes to the truth that I'm sharing in this podcast today. Anything you know how to do, you've had to learn how to do it. Whether it's go to medical school and become a medical doctor or repair a lawnmower, he said. I'm so grateful my neighbor opened my eyes and helped me to see. I'm lying to myself to think, get this, get this. I'm wrapping my arms around you. I'm giving a hug. You can do anything you want to as long as you put forth some effort and as long as you practice. Now let me be one more PS and then we're done. I do believe there's some things you'll enjoy more than others. I do believe there's some things you'll be good at or better at than other things. I understand that. I get it. But whatever it is you want to pursue, whether it's music or sports or public speaking or education.

Whatever it might be, realize I don't know how to do that right now. But neither does anyone else know how to do that when they first started until they got good at it. Zig Ziglar used to say this. Anything in life worth doing at all is worth doing poorly until you can learn how to do it better. And one day you'll learn how to do it good. I hope today's encouraging thoughts have helped you. Don't be so down on yourself. Realize, hey, there are things I don't know, but I can learn them. If I put forth some effort and I practice. You'll be glad that you did. I look forward to our next time together. Thank you so much. God bless you. For more information about this podcast, please visit www.becoming wiserpodcast.com.