Sami WunderCEO, Dating and Relationship Coach For Ambitious Women / 1200+ client success stories / Mum / Wife

Controlling your neediness

20 Jan 2024 · 0 min

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0:24

In this segment, Sami Wunder explains that when you miss someone and feel a strong desire to hear from them, failing to emotionally self‑regulate leads you to act on that neediness—by texting or calling. He argues that such impulsive contact diminishes testosterone levels and undermines the natural pursuit instinct that fuels attraction. The core message is to control these urges, maintain emotional balance, and preserve the chemistry that keeps the other person interested.

You are missing a guy and you want to see him more often, missing hearing from him. If you're not emotionally self-regulated, if you can't control your neediness and feelings of, oh, I miss him, oh, I really want to hear him, then you're going to act on those feelings. You're going to start texting, calling, and you are going to kill the testosterone. You are going to kill the pursuit instinct.