Sami WunderCEO, Dating and Relationship Coach For Ambitious Women / 1200+ client success stories / Mum / Wife

He disappeared and she texted him ...

5 Jun 2026 · 1 min

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0:44

In this YouTube advice clip, relationship coach Sami Wunder recounts a case where a woman’s partner vanished for more than a week without explanation. After the disappearance, the woman sent a conciliatory text, assuming it would show her kindness and understanding. Sami challenges this assumption, arguing that such over‑availability signals low value to the man, reinforcing the idea that he can ignore her without consequence. He emphasizes that maintaining scarcity and boundaries, rather than constant accessibility, is more likely to increase a woman's perceived value in a romantic context.

Chapters

What actually happened was that the guy she's been dating for over 3 months completely disappeared on her for over a week. And then, without telling us, she sent this text. And so when she got on a call with me on one of our weekly calls, I said to her, don't tell me you sent this. She said, Sami, I did send this. I said, how do you think it was received by the man? Well, he probably thinks I like him and I am very understanding. I said, no, He thinks that he has you, and he thinks that it's okay to ignore you for a week in the name of, I've just been busy, and you are still there and still waiting and still kind and still accessible. Do you really think this increases your value in a man's eyes? It absolutely does not.