How to Be a HOT, CONFIDENT and Desirable Woman 🔥

Most people think that being hot is all about having a sexy body and looking amazing with a slim figure. But if that was all there was to hotness and being a desirable woman, then I wouldn't be working with celebrities and models who are struggling to attract great men and keep the passion and romance alive in their relationships. Now, in my world, being a hot woman is all about your ability to like and love yourself and to show up in Your authenticity without seeking validation or approval from the very men you like. Yes, when a woman can tap into the courage of showing up as her full, embodied, powerful self and not seek validation from that man she's dating that she likes, or from her partner, this is what totally ups her desirability factor and, counterintuitively, makes a man like you and feel desire for you so much more. This is dating and relationship coach Sami Wunder, and if you've just found me, make sure to subscribe to my channel, where I teach amazing, smart, successful women how to attract an empowered masculine man in record time. Now, when I look at any woman who is looking to up her hotness factor, the second piece of important advice I'm going to give her is to stop feeling the pressure to follow the trends. So when you look at the fashion industry, when you look at social media and magazines, you know, there's all these trendy bags, trendy dresses, how to dress to impress, how to have nails like this and drink your wine like that and eat your croissant like this. I don't think any woman who is looking to be authentic and hot needs to be following and keeping up with the trends. In fact, I have personally never followed the trends and I have great adoring husband and man in my life. I feel very secure in who I am without having ever felt the pressure to follow fashion trends. In fact, I think what really ups my confidence factor, my hotness factor, is my ability to like myself and show up the way I desire to show up and to wear the clothes that make me feel good, to wear the clothes and styles that may be even coming from the 1980s or 1990s. Who cares? But if I feel like a million bucks in that, if I feel good in my body, if I feel confident, that is the way I am going to be choosing to express myself. So I think if you're looking to up your hotness factor, stop putting the pressure to follow trends and start asking yourself, you know, who am I truly? And what is the kind of fashion and style that suits my body, that makes me feel like a million bucks? And then have the courage to go with that. Like, have the courage to wear that. I think when you're standing in a room, room, whether you're married or you're dating. I think what really catches people's attention and ups your desirability factor is your ability to hold your own power and your own personal self-expression. And I think fashion is one of the ways women can truly express themselves, but it only works for you if you're not following the trends, but actually following what makes you feel like a million bucks. Now, the 3rd piece of advice that I want to give every woman who is looking to up her Hotness factor is not being a people pleaser. I think so often women are rewarded for being overgivers, for sacrificing themselves, for putting their needs last, for putting their partner, their children, their careers on the top of their list and putting themselves at the bottom of the list. But here's the thing, girl: if you want to be seen as a desirable woman, if you actually want to be hot and you want your man to Come for you and throw you in the bed and make love to you like the Stone Age masculine man, or you're dating and you like all these great guys that you're meeting, but you feel like they keep fizzling out, there is a huge chance that you are not putting yourself at the top of the list. And if you want to be that desirable woman, you've got to stop people-pleasing, you've got to stop man-pleasing, you've got to attend to your own needs. And at some level, I think it feels selfish, but I I like to look at that level of selfishness as self-care and self-love. And when you show up as a woman who is in touch with her needs, who is in touch with what she wants, I think it really ups your desirability factor and your hotness factor. Now, another thing that really makes you, as a woman, hot is when you have boundaries. And when you are having the ability to say no. I think so often we confuse hotness with either just appearance or wearing skimpy clothes, but I think hotness is really an energy of self-worth and self-value. And so when a woman has boundaries and when a woman is able to say no, you know, this works for me, that doesn't work for me, or when a woman is able to say, can you drive to my side of the town? That would make my life easy, or when a woman is able to say, can we take it slow with the sex and the physical intimacy? I would like to know you a little more before we go in that direction. It makes you so hot and so desirable. And of course, this is not just true for women who are dating. This is also true for our relationships. Even though I've been married for over a decade to my amazing husband, I think one of the things that still keeps Chris on his toes for me and keeps his desire factor for me so alive is because I'm not afraid to draw my boundaries. I'm not afraid to say, no, I cannot sacrifice my evening with the children so that you can go play golf tonight. Maybe I would do it on a day when I am feeling more rested, but tonight, no, I need your support in the house, and I need you to be here because I am tired, and I need your support with the kids. And so I think Men may not always like your boundaries. People may not always like the fact that you can look after yourself and say no and advocate for yourself. But desirability and hotness is not about being liked. Desirability and hotness is not about being the person that pleases the other opposite sex. It's about the person who is able to hold on to their value in a way that it actually makes the opposite sex want them more. So, I know that even though drawing your boundaries, saying no to men, can be scary for women— I see that with my ELEVATE clients all the time. ELEVATE is my 6-month group coaching program where I help empowered, successful women to attract empowered, masculine men, or heal their marriages and relationships. We run 2 separate cohorts. But what I notice is that women are so often scared of drawing boundaries with men because it brings up a sense of fear within us. It brings up a sense of, am I going to lose the guy? Or is he going to think I'm too dramatic, too difficult, too high maintenance? And I'm just going to invite you to release those fears, because they are literally coming from that people-pleasing, man-pleasing version of you that we just spoke about in this video. Instead, own your boundaries and have the courage to be the woman who is not afraid to rock the boat, who is not afraid of conflict, who is willing to put her needs first, put her boundaries first, advocate for herself and her self-interest, because it actually makes you so much sexier to men and so much more desirable to men than you can imagine. So if you want to be a hot girl, if you want to be a desirable girl, today, after watching this video, I want you to go and think of the places where you've been stopping yourself from drawing boundaries with men, whether it be in dating or it be in relationships. Now, the next piece of advice that I'm going to give to every woman who is looking to up her hotness factor is to honor your body more deeply. And this can feel emotional, and this can feel triggering, because somehow we are all taught to think of hotness as being a particular body size, being Slim, having size 0. I'm not size 0, but I am very, very hot for my husband. And how do I know that? I know that because he shows it to me every day in the way he treats me, both in the bedroom and outside of it. So, I really want you to start treating your body as sacred, regardless of what body size you are, regardless of where you have the weight, regardless of how you have been getting all these messages about a hot woman is a woman who looks like X and Y. Because I think the more you develop a relationship with your body, and the more you treat it as sacred, firstly, it does help in releasing any excess fat that you may be carrying on your body for whatever reason. But also, because then you start to celebrate your body, and you give yourself permission to try different kinds of clothes, different kinds of fashion. And more than anything, when you love your body, You don't hide it. So you don't have to wear skimpy clothes to be hot. But I think, again, connected with what we spoke about, you know, fashion as a way of self-expression, I think when we don't like our bodies, we tend to hide them under baggy clothes. But if you really start loving your body and really start honoring your body, you may feel like the courage to be more playful with fashion and the courage to be more experimental with fashion. You can try different colors and you can be more bold with how you're expressing yourself. And that is totally going to up your hotness factor, because it just shows that you like yourself, you love yourself, and you're not judging yourself for the weight on your arms or the weight on your belly. And here's the second reason why I encourage every woman who wants to up her hotness factor to love her body more. I think when we love our body more, we can be so much more relaxed during physical intimacy if we are in a long-term partnership. When my kids were born, you know, and I had gained weight, which is, I think, the most normal natural thing. I think it deserves to be celebrated, given that we women create life. But let's just say that it really helped me love my body, even in that shape and form. And I was able to not judge myself when my husband was with me in the bedroom. And it really made me feel like I could still be myself and like myself, even though, you know, I may not be the optimal body size or whatever that means. So I think loving our body actually makes us show You show up with so much more relaxation and self-acceptance and love and play in the bedroom. And there's nothing hotter than a woman who likes herself. Just think of the energy of a woman, you know, it's Meghan Trainor in the I'm All About the Bass song. You don't judge her for her body size, you just love her energy. And imagine you could bring that level of self-acceptance and self-love by loving your body into the bedroom, because I really think that ups your hotness factor. And if you're single, loving your body can That will mean that you will have deeper and bigger boundaries around sex, because you honor your body, and your body is your sacred temple, and you're not just gonna let any man access this amazing body and access this amazing temple. So, I think you really up your hotness factor, and you really up your desirability factor, when you are treating sex as more sacred, and you're not afraid of a man leaving you or ghosting on you, just because you decided to take it slow with the sex part in dating, something that we talk a lot about in ELEVATE. So, if you're looking to be hot, what is most powerful is to understand that hotness is an energy you embody as a woman, and it does not come from your looks, it does not come from your clothes. And while those things can definitely contribute, clothes and fashion contribute to hotness, Your healthy body contributes to hotness. I think really what you're looking at is loving and liking yourself deeply, and having the courage to show up as authentic and as who you are, even if that means there are going to be men who won't like you for being who you are, and there are going to be people in the room who will not accept you for who you are. But that's cool, because you like Love, and accept yourself. And you're not living a life where you are trying to seek validation and approval from others, but you know how to take the space in any given room to show up as you are. If you're introverted, you're introverted. If you're extroverted, you're extroverted. But you don't keep changing yourself in order to be liked and desired. And I think owning that energy is what makes a woman truly hot. If this was helpful, make sure you If this video helped you, hit like, subscribe to my channel, leave a comment, and if you'd like to work with me inside ELEVATE to attract your Empowered Masculine Man in the shortest amount of time possible, make sure to get on the waitlist. ELEVATE is not a cheap program. It is a high-level, 4-figure investment, but our clients tell us it is worth every penny because of the amazing results it helps you create in your love life. The link to the waitlist is in the video description below. See you soon again! Bye!