How To Let Him Go Gracefully? What To Say To A Man When You're Not Feeling It
In this video, dating expert Sami Wunder addresses women who have been on a few dates with a man they find kind and compatible on paper but lack physical chemistry. She emphasizes that physical attraction is essential and cannot be forced, and advises women to be truthful to themselves and the man. Wunder recommends giving a man at least three dates to assess attraction, after which, if the spark is still missing, the woman should end the dating relationship. She provides a verbatim, respectful script for breaking up with a man, including an optional invitation to remain friends. The video also covers how to handle potential negative reactions, maintain personal boundaries, and manage guilt. Throughout, she frames the advice as a short‑term discomfort that leads to long‑term happiness. The latter part of the video promotes her 6‑month group coaching program, ELEVATE, outlining its modules, live coaching calls, and Facebook support community, and invites viewers to enroll.
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How to let go of a man gracefully. Have you tried to give a man a chance to date you, but you're just not feeling it for him? Maybe he's a really nice guy, but you don't feel the chemistry, you don't feel the spark, and now you're wondering, how can I get out of this situation while doing minimum damage to his feelings and not feeling like a horrible person myself? Well, if that's your situation, you are going to love this video because I'm going to give you the exact script you can say to a man in order to let him go gracefully and maybe even end up winning a friend at the end of it. So keep watching. This is dating and relationship expert Sami Wunder, and I specialize in helping smart, strong, successful single women find and keep amazing love in their lives. And I'm pretty good at what I do, with a terrific record of helping hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of my clients walk down the aisle and say, I do, to the man they love. All right. So if you're new to my channel, don't forget to hit the subscribe button, because I'm going to be giving you amazing content on how to navigate modern-day dating without playing small, without dumbing down, and still embodying your soft feminine energy that is so magnetic to empowered, healthy masculine men. All right, so let's look at the situation that you are finding yourself in with this person. My guess is that you most likely decided to give him a chance because, on paper, he looks great, he meets a lot of your non-negotiables, he meets your minimum standards, and maybe you've just noticed that he's a kind and generous and gentle man that is worth giving a chance to. And yet, after a few dates, you are finding that you're just not feeling it. He is doing everything right on paper, but you just don't feel that level of attraction. You don't feel that chemistry. And now you are in this dilemma where, number one, you don't want to hurt his feelings by rejecting him. Number two, you feel like a bad person because you're judging yourself for being too difficult, being too high maintenance. You're telling yourself that you can never find the right guy and never feel attracted to anybody, and so something must be wrong with you. And so you're judging yourself, and you're maybe even doubting yourself. Am I right? Now, if this is happening for you, I want to give you a few reminders, my dear Wounded Diva. The first reminder is that, yes, it is really important to have compatibility with a great guy and find somebody you can actually build a long-term relationship with in terms of character and values and generosity. But physical attraction is also a really important part of the romantic equation, and you cannot force it. You cannot force yourself to feel physical attraction for a guy. And so a guy may look great on paper and may actually be a really good person, but if you are not feeling it, then it is not fair to you to keep carrying on with this relationship. And so I'm going to give you the script very soon, but I think it's so important that you understand the reason behind why it is so important to be true to yourself and to be honest to yourself, because I know if you're like me, or if you're like one of my clients, you probably self-doubt. yourself, and you judge yourself for not wanting to be with this person. So it's really important to remember, you can't force physical attraction, and if you're not feeling it, you owe it to him and you owe it to yourself to be truthful about the situation. Now, in my work inside ELEVATE, which is my 6-month live group coaching program, I teach women to give at least 3 dates to men before they make up their mind. Now, this is because sometimes that physical attraction may not be there on the first date. The guy may be nervous, you may be nervous, and just give it a little time is my invitation to my clients, because very often when a man starts to get comfortable around you and you start to get comfortable around a man, you are able to see that the physical attraction is actually However, if you don't feel that attraction after 3 dates, even in my method, it is absolutely essential that you let the guy go. Because if you don't do that, then you are wasting your precious time dating somebody who you will probably never end up marrying or being together with, and you're also wasting his time. Even he deserves to know the truth of what your feelings are, so that he can also not get more attached and not get more invested in this relationship. So 3 dates is what we say is really the magical number to get to know somebody. And if you're still confused after that, maybe a 4th date or a 5th date, but no more, because after that, it becomes really a time-wasting activity. for both parties. And last but not the least, I think what is most important for you to remember as a woman is that you get to have a relationship not just with a man who is kind and generous and, you know, a great giver and provider, but also somebody you are deeply sexually satisfied by. And if that is missing, then you are literally walking into a situation that is going to make you miserable for the rest of your life. And that is a cost I am not going to allow you to be willing to pay, just because you're feeling so bad about hurting his feelings right now, or just because you feel like a really mean person rejecting him right now, despite how good and wonderful he's been to you. So remember, this script that I'm going to give you now may cause some slight discomfort for you to speak in the moment, because of course you're a kind person, you're a good person, and you don't want to hurt his feelings. It is truly for the good of all. It's for your good, and it's for his good. So this is momentary discomfort in the short term, so that you can be happier in the long run and be with the person you are meant to be with. Okay, so on that note, what is the script? The script is as follows: Hey, name— Robert, Tom, Harry. It has been such a joy getting to know you, and you have been so wonderful and so kind to me that I believe a man like you deserves to know the truth. And after feeling into it, I realized that while you would make a great friend, I do not believe we are a match. At a romantic level. I do wish you all the best, and I hope you will find your person. Now, when you give this really respectful, really kind script, if you still want to be friends with this person, you can always say, If you're open to it, I would still love to be friends, but if not, I would understand. And believe it or not, so many times my ELEVATE clients tell me that men have gotten back to them and said, Thank you for sharing your feelings, and of course, it's not pleasant to hear, but I really still appreciate your honesty. And yes, I'd love to continue being friends. So this is the script, and remember that some men may not have a positive response to this script. I think this is what makes my clients feel uncomfortable sometimes, because some men will just get angry, they'll get They'll be upset at you. They'll be like, oh, I spent all this money dating you, and now you just want to not see me anymore? This is so wrong. This is so unfair. And remember, his feelings are not your responsibility. You're not a little girl who's going to get scared of Daddy's anger and get intimidated by a man and walk into a relationship that is not right for you, that is not authentic for you, that is not real for you. And so you owe it to yourself to be brave, to be courageous. And if a man gets disrespectful at this point, just feel free to say, I'm sorry you feel this way, and I wish you all the best. I must be true to myself. And if craziness starts, give yourself permission to block and delete. You see, we have to learn as Wunder Divas that we get to be kind, but we also get to be firm in our truth and in what we know to be true about how we what kind of relationship we desire to have in our life. And this is why I am all about intentional creation of our romantic relationships, because so many women will just keep walking into something that is wrong for them, and their heart will keep telling it to them that this is not right for you, you don't feel it, but they will not bring up the courage to say no and to say stop. This is where my work is so powerful, and this is why my clients get such amazing results with us inside the ELEVATE program, where I teach you my 6-step Love Success Framework. Basically, within that framework, there is everything you need to know and everything you need to do to go from single, point A, to engaged, loved, married, adored, whatever that version of love and commitment looks like for you. I would love, at this point, to invite you inside ELEVATE. It is currently enrolling. And it is my 6-month live group coaching program, where together with my team, myself, and 3 other amazing coaches trained by me, we are going to be helping you to learn the skills, the mindset, the tools, the strategies that you need to go from single to adored in record time. Now, inside ELEVATE, when you sign up, there are 3 main components that you get. The first one is the core content of 8 modules, which is the Love Success Framework. So you will have a lot of material to study, and I will be transmitting all my tools, tips, and knowledge and wisdom to you through those 8 modules. Now, the second element that you get inside ELEVATE is weekly live coaching calls. So yes, for the entire 6-month period, you have weekend live coaching calls with me, with the coaches, and this is where you get to ask your questions. You get highly individualized and personalized support. We are interested in getting to know you. We ask you questions back. So ELEVATE is not a cookie-cutter program, and that's why we have such great results for our clients, because we actually care about getting to know you and giving you advice and giving you recommendations that are suitable for you, your background, your age, the place you live in. And this is why the live coaching is so powerful inside ELEVATE, because it is so tailored and customized to the person sitting in front of us on the Zoom calls. Now, the 3rd element, and this is a very popular element of ELEVATE, is the Facebook group support. So inside the Facebook group, there is Daily support for the 6-month period, except of course if it's Christmas and Easter, but there is daily support otherwise in between the calls. So if things come up, if you're dating somebody and you don't know what to say, or you don't know how to navigate a given situation, you don't know how to get him to notice you, or call you, or text you, or take things to the next level, then me and the coaches are present on the Facebook group. So basically, there is a lot of amazing bespoke, customized, intimate support, live coaching that is available for you inside ELEVATE. Now, ELEVATE is a constantly evolving program. Almost every year, we are enhancing the content and we are enhancing the client experience. And the group is not a mass enrollment program. So this is not about entering a group and feeling like a number. You know, ELEVATE is a very intimate community, and we usually cap the number of participants at 100 inside the group so that we ensure that, you know, between myself and the coaches, you know, we are making you feel seen, heard, understood, and really helping you get over those blind spots that you may not be able to figure out by yourself. Now, most women who are inside ELEVATE, They come from all diverse backgrounds. In the current edition of Elevate, we have women from over 25 countries participating, which is amazing. And there are women usually between the ages of 30 to 70. More 65+, you know, very few women. And, you know, younger than 30, again, very few women. But the majority of women are between the age groups of 30 to 65, and diverse professional backgrounds as well. So you have doctors, engineers, celebrities, some amazing you-know-who people inside ELEVATE, and single mothers, and teachers, and students, and basically every woman who is coachable, who is willing to do the work, who is ready to attract her dream guy, and really do it in a very focused kind of way, you are welcome inside ELEVATE. ELEVATE is currently enrolling, and if this is exciting for you, if this is interesting for you, if it piques your curiosity, I would love for you to check out the program. It's in the link below. It's a mid-level 4-figure investment, so it's a meaningful investment in yourself, but Given the results our clients get, and given the results you will get from this program, the investment is actually feeling very small for our clients when they make the big wins inside ELEVATE. So my invitation to you is to book a call with us, have a conversation to see if we are the right people for you, to support you in attracting your dream man, your dream relationship, your dream husband. And you are more than welcome to also send me a DM or get in touch with me at support@samiwunder.com if you have questions about the program. Thank you so much for watching. I love you, and I'm gonna see you soon again.
