Sami WunderCEO, Dating and Relationship Coach For Ambitious Women / 1200+ client success stories / Mum / Wife

This Texting Mistake is Ruining Your Chances

31 Mar 2026 · 1 min

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1:07

In this segment, Sami Wunder warns that sending texts such as “did you miss me?” places a man on a pedestal and signals insecurity. She explains that these messages reveal a need for emotional reassurance, give the man power over the woman's emotions, and kill the polarity essential for attraction. Wunder frames dating as an evolutionary activity where both sexes aim to attract high‑value partners, and argues that constantly seeking validation prevents a woman from projecting herself as a prize.

Chapters

You are literally placing a man on a pedestal when you send him the text, did you miss me? Because it communicates to him that you are looking for emotional security, that you are still significant to him, that you are still emotionally important to him. And of course, this kind of text will also only be sent by a woman when she is feeling some kind of insecurity or anxiety in her body, not feeling sure about his level of interest in her. Now, chasing reassurance from men is a bad idea. It immediately kills the polarity. It immediately makes him feel like he has power over your emotions. And this is not about playing games. This is about understanding that dating is ultimately an evolutionary activity, where both men and women are looking to attract the most high-value mate. And you do not project yourself as the prize. You do not project yourself as the high value mate when you are constantly chasing validation from men and seeking emotional comfort in their choosing you.