In this video dating coach Sami Wunder denounces the rise of so‑called “masculinity schools” that teach men to attract women by ignoring, neglecting, and playing hot‑and‑cold. She argues that these tactics—rapid sex, rotational dating, double standards, and the belief that women secretly desire unattainable “alpha” men—lead many high‑achieving women into painful, unstable relationships. Wunder urges viewers to self‑reflect on why they chase men who withhold attention, to reclaim authentic feminine energy, set healthy boundaries, and prioritize men who are kind, consistent, and committed. She contrasts the seduction‑focused system with her own relationship philosophy centered on marriage, loyalty, and long‑term partnership, and promotes a free training called “The 5 Signs He’s a Keeper” plus her 6‑step Soulmate Attraction Method that has helped over 900 clients. The video ends with a call to action for likes, comments, and subscription.
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When a man removes his attention from you, you remove your attention from him. Do not let a man's lack of attention towards you become the reason why you find him attractive. Do not go about pursuing men, chasing men who are neglecting you, not responding to your texts, not calling you, not making the effort you know you deserve. I've recently felt a little appalled, disturbed, and shocked by some of the content I have been seeing emerging online, mind from toxic masculinity coaches who are literally teaching men that women desire to be submissive towards alpha males, that if you want to really have a woman who is gorgeous and a high-level woman in your life, make her work for you because secretly she desires that. Secretly, women desire men who don't care about them. Secretly, women desire men with status, with with money, with good looks, who they can respect and admire because of what these men have achieved. And if you know how to seduce such a woman by ignoring her, neglecting her, not giving her too many compliments, not pedestaling her, then you are going to get this top-quality woman. Now, this is BS advice, and it is the reason behind so many women ending up in painful relationships with men where these men have status, cars, money, and great jobs, but treat their partners, their girlfriends, their wives, as if they did not matter. And so, it was so important for me to make this video and remind every single woman to inquire and self-reflect: Are you attracted to men who are ignoring you, neglecting you, and not showing full interest in you? Do you find yourself getting sexually more aroused and seduced by men when they are not kind to you and are hot and cold towards you, whereas the nice guys, the good guys, the stable guys, the guys who also have good jobs, and the guys who also look good, but who show up more consistently in your life and on your dating apps, you don't find them attractive because they lack that edge, and they lack that mystery, and they lack that charm and seductive factor that is now being taught in schools of alpha masculinity. I find this very disturbing. Also because I feel like women do this whole Feminine Energy work with leaning back and learning how to let masculine men lead, but they forget that sometimes men will lead, and sometimes men will be very charismatic, and sometimes men will come for you in their full masculine energy, but only to get sex. In fact, what I read about these masculinity schools is that they are teaching men that you must sleep with a woman within the first 3 dates in order to conquer her, because that's when, you know, when she sleeps with you, that's when she starts to have feelings for you, and that's when she bonds with you. And then guess what? Within the next 24 to 72 hours, usually after sex, the woman is going to message you and she's going to share her feelings, and that's when, you know, you have the upper hand. And I was just sitting there wanting to cry, wanting to scream with anger, because This school of masculinity also talks about how you should never commit to a woman first. The woman should be the one committing to you. The woman should be the one asking you for the commitment. The woman should be the one chasing you down, pursuing you, because guess what? Women of today want this. That is what seduces them. They are bored of guys who are kind, who are nice, who are giving them compliments and wanting to do all the work. Now, I have to say that I was saddened not only to see this advice, but also to see that this advice truly works, because they would not be giving this advice to men if it did not work on women. And so I think it makes my mission even stronger, because after watching and reading all of this pure BS, it just made me go like, oh my God, it empowers me to go back into the world, make more videos for you ladies, to educate you that if you find yourself in ultimately abusive and toxic relationships, If you find yourself in intense relationships with men, if you find yourself in relationships where everything goes really well at the start, he's showing up in his masculine energy, he is planning the dates, texting, he is sexy, he's mysterious, he's charming, he's doing everything right, and then you let the intensity grow really fast and you sleep with him really quickly, and then you find yourself being one of his many choices 2-3 months down the line, and maybe he doesn't even pick you up to be his girlfriend. You're falling for seduction. Falling for seducer-type of men. And it is unfortunate that women don't understand that serious, healthy love, like marriage love, stability love, having children— you can't have children with a seducer-type of man. He's got so many options, and he's not really the committing type. And so I think it made so much sense to me today why so many amazing women are not able to break through their toxic relationship patterns, and it's because they keep choosing men from this place of being seduced— being seduced by his lack of attention, being seduced by his lack of effort. And if you're a high achiever, like most of my clients are, then this also means that you value what you work for. And so in these toxic masculinity schools, they are literally teaching guys teaching men that these women don't value you if you're nice. These women don't value you if you make the hard work. These women don't value you if you compliment them, if you tell them they're pretty. They get all of that all the time. These women are looking for a challenge. These women value men they work for, so make her work. Now, you have to ask yourself today if this is your truth. You have to really dig deep within yourself, and I'm inviting my entire community now to self-reflect if you are actually attracted to that. If you do not value men who come towards you, who are kind to you, who are available, who are making the effort, and you rather value men who are just charmers, seducers, very charismatic, and they know how to give you the right amount of attention to keep your interest hooked, But not too much. And I'll tell you, these men, they have a system, okay? They don't feel it for you. They may make you think they're feeling it for you, but they don't feel it for you. They are going on rotational dates. So they have a very elaborate system, and they go on rotational dates. So it's recommended in their systems to go on 2, 3 high-value women dates per week. And then basically, they're told to have sex fast, to seduce the woman, to brush up their communication skills, skills, to brush up their charm, to dress like a billionaire, even if they're not one, and all this game-playing that drives me mad. Completely opposite of the authentic relationships and the quality of authenticity that I teach my clients. And then they basically say, have an abundance mindset, sleep with these women, and then pick the best out of these 3, 4, 5, 6, 10 women you're sleeping with. And this is how you get to have the best woman. And they're not afraid to say that They have double standards because they think it's totally cool for men to rotational date, for men to even sleep with multiple women in the process of picking up a wife, in the process of picking up a girlfriend. But they talk about how a woman rotational dating is a low-quality woman, you know, because her job is not to be a mistress, but her job is to be a mother at some point. And all these double standards, they drive me crazy. I know we live in a society that is conditioned this way, you know, My husband is my one man. I'm a one-man woman, but I still do not believe that we can have such double standards about what is allowed for men and what is allowed for women. And I think if we are falling for these traps and we are falling for these seducers, it's not their fault. You know, they want sex and they want the best woman for themselves. I think it's time for us women to ask ourselves, why am I attracted to the man who neglects Why am I attracted to the man who seduces me through mystery, through intrigue, through not being so interested in me? And why then do I give my sacred body away so quickly to such a man? And then I get my heart broken, and then I blame the men, and then I basically keep repeating the same old patterns. So if you want to break out of this pattern, I'm going to go back to the start of the video, and I'm going to say once again what I said at the start, which is, If a man removes his attention from you, you remove your attention from him. No amount of learning about Feminine Energy, healthy boundaries, intimacy fears is going to break your cycle of painful relationships if you keep chasing men who are not into you, if you keep chasing men who are purposefully ignoring you, playing hot and cold on you, neglecting you, because they know it works on you. I think this is a slap in the face of the strong, successful woman who thinks she's come so far in her career, but who keeps running after the seducing type of man. And I think, ladies, divas, it's time we took our power back from these men. It's time to truly embody feminine energy, and truly embodiment of feminine energy is caring about how you feel and how a man makes you feel. And if you're feeling on edge about a man, if you're feeling like he's not really into you, if you're feeling like he's doing the bare minimum, to get you into bed, and that intrigue and that excitement is really seducing you, then it is your job to say no to that. It is your job to say, no, yes, you are seducing me, and yes, you're attractive, but you're not the kind of man I'm gonna give my body to. You're not the kind of man I'm gonna give my attention to. Because unless and until we break this right at the start, nothing is going to shift in the way we date, and ultimately the kind of relationships we end up attracting. On that note, I have a free, amazing training called The 5 Signs He's a Keeper. You can download it in the link in the video description below, and it's going to show you what are the 5 red flags you don't want to overlook, no matter what, no matter how high the connection or chemistry is. It's also going to show you the signs that a man is a true keeper, not these seduction boys, not these playboys, not these seducers who just come to get in your pants and play the game of and seduction. And finally, it's also going to give you my 6-step Soulmate Attraction Method that has led to 900+ client engagements. I stand for marriage. I stand for commitment. I stand for loyalty. I stand for you having the beautiful family and the love of a loyal, committed, empowered man. And trust me, I know it is hard as a woman in such a noisy dating and coaching industry to have all these conflicting ideas being thrown at you and to navigate the world of dating. But I'm here for you. My work is here for you. This is dating and relationship coach Sami Wunder. Thank you for joining me, and do make that self-reflection today on whether or not you are attracted to seducers who seduce you through hot and cold, neglect, mystery, and play. And let's together decide we're not going to let this happen to Like and comment if this video was helpful, if it made you think. Subscribe to my channel, and I will see you soon again.
