Sami WunderCEO, Dating and Relationship Coach For Ambitious Women / 1200+ client success stories / Mum / Wife

What to say to a man when things get serious #feminineenergy

20 Apr 2026 · 1 min

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In this short coaching monologue, Sami Wunder addresses women who reach the point where a romantic relationship becomes seriously committed. She warns against letting fear drive behavior, such as over‑functioning, over‑texting, or constantly seeking reassurance. Instead, she advises women to "surrender to the masculine"—to deliberately give up control, step back, and allow the man to choose to stay out of his own free will. By doing so, she argues, a woman retains the greatest influence because the man returns voluntarily, having thought through his desire to be with her. The advice is framed as a practical, emotionally mature approach for women navigating the transition to a serious, potentially long‑term partnership.

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Even with an emotionally mature man, you will get to a point where the relationship becomes really serious. Like, it's no longer just fun, joy, you know, we're having a good time. It's like, oh my God, she's actually wife material. Oh my God, she's actually saying that she's not going to sleep with me until we are engaged. Do I want a relationship like that? It's literally happening to one of our Elevate clients right now. And here's what I'm going to say is, it is so important that you don't get into fear. You don't get into over-functioning. You don't start sending texts like, what did I do wrong? Is it something I said? I'm so sorry. What happened? Do you want to talk. You take a deep breath, Sami Wunder style, and you surrender to the masculine. You give up control in this situation, and you understand that you actually have the most power and most influence in these situations when a man, out of his own free will, comes back to you, out of his own free desire, comes back to you, has thought through why he wants to be with you.