Forget the Funnel — This Is What Solopreneurs Use to Grow With Intention!

All right, welcome everyone to this month's deep dive workshop. We're gonna be talking about the conversation engine. Uh, you are here because you have signed up and indeed have showed up as Circle or Inner Circle members to see this live or in replay. You are in the right place if you are ready to take the philosophy and principles that we talked about as part of Be a Blessing Marketing and the strategy, the ecosystem that we created in the last workshop, and apply some tactics and some tools so that you can figure out what you're going to do and how you're going to do it to get the conversations going that are going to help naturally lead the right people to an eager yes. What you should do next is if you are an Inner Circle member, you should definitely pull up the worksheet. And if you are a Circle member, go ahead and just be ready to take some really, really good notes. And when we are all done, the replay will be immediately made available to everyone and The edited enhanced replay, the presentation notes and the worksheet and any GPTs or GPT prompts will be part of the Inner Circle All Access Vault sometime probably this weekend. For those that are in the circle, you'll have access to the complete replay when it is released as a podcast episode. So unless there are any questions about any of that, we're gonna go ahead and dive in. So let's just do a quick review about where we're at in this whole Be a Blessing marketing approach to building a business that funds and fits the life you actually want. Several weeks ago, we talked about posture. We talked about the philosophy and principles behind Be a Blessing marketing. And what we talked about is that philosophically speaking, what we are asserting and trying to prove is that we can build a business that funds and fits the life we want on our terms without any digital marketing BS by cultivating preeminence. If you become the best in the world at doing what you do and the way only you can do it, then you will have a sustainable business for the foreseeable future. You will have all the prosperity that you could possibly want along with the fulfillment, and you'll be able to have a business that's built entirely based on your personality preferences, on your terms, and you won't have to compromise doing any of the kind of things that you don't want to do. Because when you are preeminent. And as you are on the path to preeminence, you are creating gravity that is attracting the right people instead of pushing them or forcing them and using pressure with a digital marketing funnel. You are creating gravity that is naturally pulling or drawing the right people to you through your generosity and earned goodwill, earned allegiance capital. Principally, the principles that are in play with Be a Blessing Marketing is you don't need any digital marketing BS. You don't need any online tools or tactics. You don't need any social media platform. All you need to have a successful business are the 3 things that have been true of any successful business ever in the history of business, which is you need an offer that's irresistible enough to the people that are eager enough for the aspiration you can help them achieve or the problem you can help them solve. And you need a way of putting that offer in front of that audience in a way that leads them to decide for themselves to increase their desire for greater exposure, proximity, and access to you and the difference that you can make for them. So if you, when you have the presentation notes, you'll be able to click on this link and get to that workshop distillation. It's in an article that it probably will take you less than 10 minutes to read, and you'll have all the understanding you need of the philosophy and principles. Last week we talked about the strategy, the ecosystem, the Be a Blessing marketing web. And what we talked about is that again, we don't need to rely on extremely inefficient and ineffective funnels that require a huge investment of time, attention, money, and effort that prevent us from becoming the best in the world at doing what we do in the way that only we can do it, that prevent us from preeminence because we have to spend all our time, time on digital marketing BS. Instead, we can create a very simple ecosystem that allows us to share our insights, our inspiration, that allow us to show up as we are with what we have, do what we can with and the people that are around and trust that the right people will continue to seek us out. And we can do that on just the necessary platforms, the platforms that align with our personality and preferences. And that if you build this ecosystem that allows you to get the word out, share the difference that you can make in the only way that you can make it with— in the places where the people that you seek to serve already are, that is how you will initiate the conversations that we're going to talk about here today that will connect you with the right people and naturally lead the people that are ready to seek greater proximity and access to you. And so this is— the ecosystem allows us to demonstrate the value that we have, that we can deliver, our inherent virtue, our ability to make and keep promises, and the viability and the alignment of our offer as a means to help the people that we want to help achieve an aspiration or solve a problem, deliver on, on the promise that they're trying to accomplish. And the ecosystem article came out last Friday. The link will be here in the notes. Today is all about the tactics and tools. What are we going to do once we have the, the posture of preeminence and the ecosystem that'll, that provides the strategy? What are we going to do and how are we going to do it? That's what we're going to talk about today, and we call this the conversation engine. Why conversation? The fundamental principle here is that content opens loops and conversation cultivates consideration. We are using content to introduce our innovative ideas as information that initiates a crack in the right people's belief system that leaves room for a better belief to be inserted and considered. Conversation inserts these better ideas. And these better solutions, the solutions that better align with the people that you're serving. And through empathetic antagonism, presenting this insight and information in a way that gets under their skin just enough to get them interested to take the next step into possibility and their potential with you. So what we are doing is using conversation to create curiosity and consideration for your offer. And we are not relying on any of the dramatics or gymnastics associated with digital marketing BS. All we're doing is applying care and consideration to the conversation that we're in right now with the people that whose lives will be enhanced by colliding with the difference only you can help them make in the way only you can help them make it. Content earns exposure, them becoming aware and paying attention to what you can do for them, and proximity, them becoming trusting of you and giving you permission to have direct, personal, relevant conversations with them. Conversation earns that trust and permission and creates interest, enrollment, and leads to investment, which is all sales stuff. Awareness, attention, permission, trust, that's all marketing stuff. We want to cross the bridge into interest, enrollment, and investment through this conversation engine. The governing principle here, it's often called conversation is the fastest path to cash. When you hear Nick Peterson or Laurel Portier talk about it, that's what they say. I'm not big on pursuing cash as an end in and of itself. I think cash is a naturally occurring effect or side effect of doing meaningful work with the right people. And so conversation is the fastest path from awareness to investment is the way that I think about it. A lot of you are familiar with Stealth Influence. This is a Nick Peterson approach to content generation. It's part of the R3 manual that some of you have bought in the past. It's now available in a new format on Amazon. I highly recommend it. I'm not going to go into a lot of detail about this. It's just a way of thinking about generating content that allows you to take one idea and present it through 4 lenses so that you can reach the 4 different kinds of people. There are people that make decisions based on their aspirational desires. There are people that make decisions based on their analysis of relevant data. There are people that make decisions based on taking intentional action with insight that they've received to test its, uh, uh, viability. And there's people that are attracted to the, the, the, the wonders of human behavior. So aspirational, analytical, actionable, anthropological content is what Stealth Influences teaches. You can take one post and turn it into 4 posts through presenting it through each of these lenses. You should never try to jam it all into one post. You want to reach the right person at the right time with the right kind of content. And so if you are interested in that approach, I encourage you to check out Stealth Influence. My honest-to-goodness take is, I, although I, I love the idea, I personally am big on writing, uh, I, I'm not big on the analytical content. I always struggle with that, so I just pretty much don't do it. I write a lot of aspirational content. I write a lot of actionable content. I write a lot about the wonders of human biases and beliefs. So I use the other 3 lenses just kind of naturally. I've never actually systematically gone through this approach, but something to think about if you're struggling with generating content consistently and reaching more of the right people. The Mirror Principle is, I think, the more important principle here. What we're talking about here is the idea that you're gonna be better served by making the difference that you can make in the way only you can make it and building a business that funds and fits the life that you want on your terms without compromise by looking in the mirror. And the people that you seek to serve are going to be better served by looking in the mirror. Because ultimately, your ability to succeed in business and their ability to succeed in whatever it is that you help them succeed in is dependent upon the three virtues of any human endeavor. And that is restraint, receptivity, and responsibility. They have to be open, to the possibility. They have to have restraint about doing all the things they don't need to do and actually doing the one or two things they need to do. And they have to take responsibility for their own adventure in accomplishing whatever they want to accomplish. And that is also true of you. If you are a purpose-driven person running a purpose-driven business, your job is not to persuade or influence people, and it's certainly not to manipulate them with digital marketing BS. It's to hold up a mirror precisely enough to the person that you're in conversation with so that they see themselves and their own situation more clearly, that they see the possibility of accomplishing what they want to accomplish. They see the limitlessness of their potential, and they are arriving at their own truth and taking their next best step into their potential and possibility of their own volition. Through your ability to use empathetic antagonism to hold the right mirror up to that person at the right moment. So the Conversation Engine is entirely based on helping people reach their own conclusions and take action of their own volition. Not pressure, not force, not tricks, hacks, or manipulation. They have to own their journey, and they have to decide and take the next step of their own accord. That's what we're talking about when we talk about inception. That is what the art of the eager yes is all about. Not how do you engineer the result that you want, but how do you help them get clear about and closer to what they want, and over time have them arrive of their own accord that they want to continue to work with you to get more clarity, to get more confidence, and to close the gap with greater ease and velocity. All of this Conversation Engine stuff boils down to 4 key moves. I would have called them steps, but I love the idea of thinking of them as movements. It's, you know, we have some musicians in the room that understand that music often happens in movements. I love that idea. The first movement you should all already be familiar with, but this is what is called the icebreaker phase. I call it the Catalyst Exchange of my own icebreaker sequence. But just think of it as an icebreaker is just how you start a conversation, how you initiate a connection that gets people to start to speak with you about their dreams, hopes, desires, aspirations, problems, whatever it is. You're helping people through the icebreaker phase. You're helping them clearly identify their most immediate goal and their most immediate constraint. The actual goal and constraint, not the ones usually that they come in at you with in the first place. But how do you have these— how do you initiate conversations that get people to open up to you about what they're trying to accomplish and what is currently in their way. This is not about asking qualifying questions. This is not about scripts and templates and perfect 9-word email questions. This is about you showing up to— go back to the first workshop— with the posture of someone who is genuinely curious about helping someone accomplish what they want to accomplish. So, The 4 steps of the icebreaker phase are helping you assess the identity of the person that you're speaking to. What excites them most? What gets— what, what do they truly want? How do they truly see themselves? Direction: what are they trying to figure out right now? Constraint: what's the thing that is presently the biggest obstacle in their path? What's the thing that is harder than it needs to be because they are making it harder, or maybe they don't even see it? And how do you create traction? How do you help them not only see what they're trying to accomplish but start to make a little progress so that they see that it can be made clear and they can earn confidence that they can actually accomplish the thing that they want to accomplish? Those are the 4 steps of the icebreaker phase. When I talk about the Catalyst Exchange, that is the, the mechanism that I used to initiate conversations through my content, usually through a call to action within the post or a call to action in a direct message or outreach by email. It's not an offer. It's something I do for absolutely free. It's just the way that I show up in the world as a curious person that is interested in helping other people get clear about closer to they— what they want, which means that first, We have to define what it is that they actually want, where they are and what they're starting with and how they're going about getting there, what's in their way. So it's the step that earns the diagnostic. So the icebreaker is not part of the diagnostic sequence or the diagnostic questions. The identity questions that we're asking help us define whether someone is a good fit now, good fit later, or not a good fit. For the difference that we can help them make in the way only we can help them make it. I have constructed kind of two different pathways for the people that I talk to. There's people that are building a business, doing work that matters, and then there's people that are pursuing the next chapter of their life. They're trying to figure out how they can live a life of more meaning and fulfillment, and maybe that is outside the realm of building a business. So I have the work that matters path or the art of living path. I'm gonna be giving examples of these as we go. Within each of those paths, there are people that are a good fit now because they're ready, they understand the problem that they have or the aspiration that they seek to achieve, and they see me as a possible means to that end. And then there's people that are a good fit later. Maybe they don't have enough clarity right now. And so how can I, how can I help them become a good fit now by helping them get clear about what they're actually trying to accomplish? And then there's the people that are not a good fit. We don't align on values, we don't align on taking responsibility for our, our own approach. And maybe I can turn those people into a good fit later. Maybe I need to be— show up with kind of generous polarization and encourage them to move along and find the help that they need from someone that is more aligned with who they are and what they're trying to accomplish. I'm just going to mention the Grada format here as a useful structure for having these conversations. I'm not going to unpack it here. Those of you that are clients are very familiar with this because it's the only way that you are allowed to communicate with me in Boxer. I want to know what you're trying to accomplish, what your goal is, what resource you're currently using, what action you're currently taking, what you've discovered by your most recent action, and then ask the question that will help you get— take the next step into possibility in solving your, your current problem or achieving your current aspiration. But all of you that are inner circle members that participate in the monthly calls. This is the same format you use. I'm sharing the Grotto format as just something that's worthy of your consideration as you are having these conversations for yourself. So an example of an icebreaker from my perspective, from the Creative on Purpose example, is I often will get to the question, what are you working on right now? Or what are you working through right now? Just one simple question that helps us start to define a vector where that— what they're trying to accomplish, where they are, and what they're starting with, and what the path might look like. That one question, and maybe the questions that leading up to that, maybe a few of the questions after that, help me define their fitness. Are they a good fit now? Good fit later? Good? Not a good fit? Their readiness to engage in additional conversation. And I'm able to do those things simultaneously through the icebreaker phase. The Catalyst Exchange is the next step beyond the icebreaker for those that are ready to go a little bit deeper. So if at this point you're already starting to think, well, that all sounds good, but I don't really know how to start these kind of conversations, what icebreaker conversations would I use or questions would I ask? Feel free to reach out to me. Uh, I'm happy to talk about ways that we can start to help you. Maybe the first step is even just setting up your ecosystem, but if you're ready to start engaging these conversations but don't know how to begin, let's talk about how we can help you start to get those conversations going. The whole point of the icebreaker is to lead to what we call the diagnostic. We don't call this a diagnostic when we're sharing it with other people because we're not doctors. We should not be diagnosing or prescribing anything to anybody. It's just a helpful way to think about it. The diagnostic is simply how you are clarifying the vector, where they are and what they're starting with, what they are trying to accomplish and what that looks like, and the 2 or 3 things they need to do to get closer to what they're trying to accomplish. The whole point of a diagnostic is to create— and this is Nick Peterson language from R3— the HFM, the holy fuck moment, where you provide an insight, an epiphany, a revelation that so shocks and pleases them that they can't help but become desirous of getting more proximity and access to you. So when I am in an icebreaker conversation and it's time to either invite someone or someone is asking how they can take the next step,