A financial counselor explains how childhood shapes whether you're a spender or saver, and why that mismatch causes fights in marriages. Crown teaches couples to talk about money and set goals together instead of letting money stress destroy the relationship.
So we all know some spenders in our life, we all know savers in our life. They all originate from usually their childhood, there's been an event, or usually their parents have shaped the way they think about money and their money blueprint, so to speak. So if you are in a position where you are a saver and you're in a relationship with a spender, or vice versa, it's going to be volatile. You're going to have issues. I think the marriage Statistics are about 60% of marriages break up, and of those 60% that breakup, 70% are because of money. Seven in 10 marriages that are breakout are because of money. That's because spenders are marrying savers and vice versa. So the very first thing to do if you are a spender and you're married to a saver, or you are a saver and you're married to a spender, is sit down and find out why and how did you come up with this money blueprint? Why are you a saver? What happened as your childhood? What were your parents like with money? Where did you get this from? There's obviously an underlying element there which is causing them to think and act that way. And same goes for spenders. Why are you a spender? Well, because my dad died early. He didn't get to enjoy all of his money. He was saving, saving, saving, but he actually never got to experience everything. And I don't know how long I'm going to be here for. I want to spend it now and enjoy it now. Those mindsets are so different and they're framed in certain ways, but that conversation needs to be had for the sake of your marriage or for the sake of the relationship there. What we really focus on at Crown is helping this person who is a saver see the other side of the story and also helping the spender see the savior side of the story. And we really become the umpire and we take out the stress, we take out the friction between the couple, and we help them do what they do best, which is live and go back to a happy relationship. And we take on all that money stress. We take on all the issues around money, whether we should be saving enough or spending enough. And we've got a set system there where, where we set some goals and targets so the spender is satisfied as well as the saver. And when you start hitting goals and targets, for example, let's pay $60,000 off our mortgage over the next three years, we hit that spender. You can then blow money on any holiday, anywhere in the world so they've got something to look forward to. There's some light at the end of the tunnel. What a saver hates is when a spender is just blowing money left, right and center without any look at the consequence of those decisions there. So the conversation's the first part. We can then help give you some structure and strategies on how to deal with your spender saver partner. Because if you can sort that out, your relationship just goes to another level.
