Coach Glaze shares how a player named Jason's late arrival to practice revealed why empathy matters more than assumptions. By asking questions and understanding teammates' real circumstances, leaders build the connection that actually wins games.
That's the second thing winning teammates connect to, not just a goal, but to each other. I want to tell you about Jason. Jason was a good basketball player, but every Saturday morning we had Saturday practices Jason was late. That happened in October, it happened in November, and when finally we got to December and he showed up late again, well, I was a little bit frustrated, and I blasted him when I probably shouldn't have, because I was a good coach, I had rules, rules were going to be followed, so when he came into practice 10 or 15 minutes late, I asked him, "Jason, are you serious? Do you not care about this team? Obviously this is not something that's important to you because you could be a starter and yet every single time when you have a chance to be here, you're not." He shrugged his shoulders, started running because that was the rule. Later that afternoon, one of his teammates came into my office. "Coach Glaze, do you still not know Jason's situation?" What situation? Coach, his grandma won't let him ride with anybody else, but she won't bring him until his little brother's taken care of. See, his little brother's a paraplegic. Whew, what an idiot I was. How bad did I feel? Because I made assumptions and punished instead of asking questions to understand. Winning teammates connect not just with a goal, they connect with each other. You know, one of the best days I had coaching that team was on a Sunday afternoon because Jason and his family were moving from one house to another. And I knew that his grandmother wasn't going to be able to move many boxes. So our coaching staff and our players and even a few parents got together that Sunday afternoon, we moved boxes and we moved furniture and we had a meal together and our kids connected and became closer teammates because they invested in themselves, in each other. Now, you don't have to help somebody move, You don't have to cater their wedding, but you do need to know and care about what's going on in their life.
