SHAMSUDIN HAKIMI help you break the Love Pattern that keeps choosing the wrong person.

4 Signs You’re a Fixer in Your Relationships

1 Jan 2026 · 1 min

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In this concise self‑help monologue, the speaker outlines four characteristic signs that indicate someone is a "fixer" in romantic relationships. A fixer is defined by a pattern of seeking to improve or heal a partner rather than simply being present. The four signs are: (1) being attracted to a partner’s potential rather than who they currently are; (2) taking on the role of therapist and processing the partner’s past trauma; (3) making excuses for the partner’s problematic behavior; and (4) feeling personally responsible for the partner’s healing and wellbeing. The speaker suggests that recognizing these signs can help individuals understand their own relational dynamics and consider stepping out of the fixer role.

Chapters

Here's four signs you're a fixer. Sign number one is you're attracted to people with potential. You don't date who they are, you date who they could be. Sign number two, you become their therapist, not their partner. You're processing their childhood trauma at 2am in the morning rather than just being with them and being present and enjoying who they are. Sign number three, you make excuses for their behavior. They're just going through something, or they've been hurt before, or this is the way that they deal with it. And sign number four is you feel responsible for their healing. If they don't get better, then it's your fault. Now, if this is you, then you're a fixer.