What feels like chemistry with an emotionally unavailable partner is actually your anxious nervous system in a chase loop. When they pull away, you pursue, prove yourself, and obsess. Red flags include slow responses, frequent cancellations, deflecting emotional questions, and blaming poor communication skills.
While they're dangerous for chasers, this is your Kryptonite. The emotionally unavailable person activates your chaser pattern. When they pull away, your nervous system says, chase. Prove your worth. Win them back. And before you know it, you're right back in the loop. Anxious, Obsessing, losing yourself, trying to make them choose you. Here's some of the red flags. They take days to respond, then act like nothing's wrong. They cancel plans frequently with vague excuses. They deflect when you ask about feelings or the future. They're great at beginnings, terrible at consistency. They say, I'm just not good at communication. Like that's an excuse. The hard, true.
