Cedric's story reveals why people who constantly fix others end up trapped in a martyr loop. The pattern starts with a wound that says you're not enough, so you rescue others to feel worthy. Breaking it requires healing that wound and actually practicing self-care, not just talking about it.
And something I had to tell Cedric that I tell all of my clients is that self care is never selfish. Because the thing is, is that in the short term, he feels purposeful, like he's honoring his pain by turning it into something beautiful. But in the long term, he becomes the martyr. The man who fixed everyone else but couldn't fix himself and he couldn't enjoy the fruits of his labor. And that's the fixer loop. How does Cedric have these loops? It's because of a wound. A wound that says I was not enough to keep.
