In this personal‑development video, Dr Shiny Unsal, creator of Neuroshine technology and a Neuroshine coach, explains why listening is a two‑way street and outlines five clear behaviors that indicate someone is not listening effectively. She describes each sign—interrupting, changing topics, treating conversation as a debate, playing with devices (multitasking), and repeatedly asking the speaker to repeat themselves—explaining the mental habits behind them and offering concrete, actionable steps to stop each habit (e.g., pause before speaking, ask permission before shifting topics, focus on being present rather than “winning,” put devices away, and give full attention). Unsal emphasizes that good listening builds respect, reduces communication problems, and helps both parties feel heard. The video ends with a motivational call‑to‑action to practice these habits, share the video, and subscribe for more content on communication, NLP, coaching, and leadership development, reinforcing the broader goal of creating more loving, “shiny” minds.
Chapters
My name is Shiny Unsal. I am the proud creator of Neuroshine technology and your Neuroshine coach. Today we're going to talk about 5 signs you are not listening. Don't you feel annoyed when you feel like you're not heard or listened to? It's the same for others. People are going to feel annoyed if you're not listening to them and if they don't feel heard and appreciated, and that can create big communication problems. And you may not even realize you may not be a good listener. And I want to remind you, communication is a two-way street. You may be a master when you're selecting the right words and delivering your message effectively with your body language and tonality, and still yet you may be as good of a listener. Here are 5 signs that you're gonna understand you are not a good listener. Ready? Here's the first one: interrupting. If you are interrupting people before they are done with their sentences, if you cannot wait for until you make your own point, which means you're not a good listener. Interrupting also means that you have this agenda that is so inside of you, so burning for you to get it out, so it is making it hard for you to focus on what they are saying because you're just so lost in your mind. So if you ever catch yourself interrupting, Pause and don't say anything. Give them some silence and some quiet time, some space. Okay, number 2: changing topics. If you ever find yourself, you are changing topics when people are talking about something else, which means you're not a good listener. It might not be a very effective, attractive, or interesting topic for you, and still, you need to give them respect. You need to be present for them. At least you can ask them, are you done talking about this topic? Because I would love to discuss something else, right? Complete what you're talking about, put an end to it, and then move on. Otherwise, you are going to be looked at as somebody who doesn't respect and who is not a good listener, which you don't want to be. Number 3, this one is an interesting one. Debating. Communication is not a debate and you're not trying to be right. You're not trying to win the argument over somebody else. Ah, or maybe that's something you're doing in your mind, which is not a good sign. You need to stop that urge to be right and you need to focus your attention to listen to what is being said so that you can be present and you can show respect. And you can really understand what they're trying to say. If you catch yourself trying to make your own point, remember, you're not a good listener. Number 4, playing with devices. Aren't we all kind of guilty of this these days? You know, we live in a modern era and we have the iPhone, iPad, computer. We want to be busy. We want to be productive. We want to listen and we want to also create this, you know, that's kind of like effectiveness. and maybe multitasking. And hear me out, there are so many studies that have already proven multitasking is a myth. Your brain can only focus on one activity at a time. Therefore, if you find yourself and then trying to listen, just know that you're not a good listener. Therefore, please cut playing with devices and be an adult and show up respectfully and so that you can be a good listener. Number 5, asking them to repeat. Well, this is very obvious, right? If you keep asking the person you're communicating with, 'What did you say again?' 'Can you repeat that again?' 'Come again?' Well, that's an obvious sign that you are not listening and you're focused is not there. You are in another place in your own mind. You are thinking about something else. You're absolutely not listening to them. So that's why these are very, very obvious signs, and I need you to understand you can stop these, and you can definitely reverse engineer all of these signs and create a great effective listener out of yourself. Why is it important? Because you want to be heard, don't you? That's why it's important. I hope you liked this video. I hope it served you, and I hope you can improve your listening skills and become a great listener. If you liked it, please share it with your friends, and they can also become great listeners so that you can have greater, deeper conversations from now on. Also, subscribe to my channel to watch more videos about communication, neuro-linguistic programming, coaching, and leadership development to become more and achieve more so that we can create a better world with more love and shiny minds.
She'll give you her love. I love and give you her time. 'Cause she's the shiny one, shiny one, shiny one. You know she's lots of fun, lots of fun, lots of fun. We're making fun. 'Cause she's the shiny one, shiny one, shiny one. Change is awesome. And you'll have lots of fun, lots of fun, lots of fun.
