The Hidden Programming Running Your Life and Business

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I coached so many people that it's just like, I got to push, I got to strive, I got to power through, but they're burnt out. They're exhausted.

They're not doing the things that light them up because it's almost like a Band-Aid to some degree on really what the wounds that are— you almost could fake it for a minute if you can get yourself to that point. But ultimately, that history is going to find its way back in.

It always does.

So when talking to Heather, turns out about 100% of us have a messed up, effed up nervous system. We are not optimized. And I'm so excited to talk to her today because we're going to talk about what it takes to rewire our nervous systems, how to actually optimize it using Human Design, which I'm so excited to dig into, and ultimately get a better understanding of really the money patterns in our lives and allow us to make more money by just doing some things that Heather Esposito out of Charlotte is going to teach us today. I'm so excited to have you on. We're going to even demo my Human Design. You have it pulled up. We haven't looked at it. You have it ready to go. And I've been interested in learning more about how this whole thing works because I hear about it and I am pumped to have you. Welcome, Heather Esposito.

Oh my gosh, thank you. I'm so excited to be here and I'm so excited that you're like, yes, let's dive into Human Design because it's so freaking magical. But there's so much. So I'm going to warn you, we can't go over everything in 30 minutes.

All right. So you've been warned. We're going to do a little taste of Human Design in this episode. I mean, I love it when we say that 100% of us are effed up in something and you've seen that and you've learned that and your background, you know, if you're going to listen, we have some really cool stuff coming up here because Heather's also a TV superstar. Well, you know, I'll just say reality star as she was featured on Cupcake Wars and done some really cool stuff there. And she was also a coach and learned a lot under the Tony Robbins team and then built out your own consulting practice teaching the things you're teaching, have evolved and really found your lane and all things we're going to talk about today. So give me a little bit of the background. I mean, how did you get to the point you're at today? And we'll just spend a couple of minutes getting there so we can all kind of follow the path.

Yeah. So I love helping people. That has always been my mission and my passion. And once I understand my Human Design, I was like, okay, this all makes sense. But I got a master's in counseling and my first job out of there was working as a therapist at a group home. So dealing with teenagers with, you know, abandonment issues, sexual trauma, sexual abuse. And I very quickly realized that the system is not set up for healing. And that was really hard for somebody who's like all about wanting to heal stuff, help people heal. And I was having my own like dark night of the soul and I was talking to my dad. He was like, well, just quit. You can go back to like waitressing and substitute teaching till you figure out what you want to do. And I was like, I have a master's. That's humiliating. I can't do that. But it just got to the point where I was like, yeah, I really need to do that. And so I quit and it was Christmas time and I was doing what most people do around Christmas, which was eat a bunch of junk. And as I was eating the junk—

hold on, so just like give us time period. Like you're how old? Like you just graduated college?

I took the long route for college because I made some bad choices in college and I had to put myself through school. So it took me a long time to get through undergrad to grad school. So I was late 20s, I think, and I got to a point where I was so depressed that I couldn't get out of bed. And I lay in bed, I felt more tired getting up than I did the night before. My body felt like it had cement in it. And I, I decided that I want to die. And I thought about 5 different ways to take my life.

Wow.

It was really intense. But you know how these thoughts come through really fast, right? And so I was like, I'm going to take my own life. I just don't want to live like this. I have no hope. And then I thought about this book that I read that talked about how sugar caused depression. Now, I love sugar, so I did not like this book. But I also thought about— I have an aunt who took her life before I ever got to meet her, and I thought about how that impacted family, and I didn't want to do that to my nieces and nephews. So I made a deal with myself to not eat sugar for a week to see how I felt. And I said, if I, you know, felt better in a week, then maybe there was something I can explore. And if I didn't, then I gave myself permission to take my life.

Oh my goodness.

Obviously, I felt You know, better, better. I wasn't 100%, but it was like, I can feel this like fog lifting, you know? And I was like, there's something here.

I'm just going back to that. You think about life's choose-your-own-adventure stories and like big decisions in our life that like one path one way, one path the other. That, my goodness. And what you had to will yourself to do that. I mean, I can't imagine how hard that was, even day one, day two, and how many times you probably played the mental game of, well, maybe I'll just do one piece of sugar. Do you remember those days? How, how tough was that?

Yeah. Because it was over Christmas, it was exponentially harder, but I was just desperate. I was so desperate to— and I was like, I just can't do it anymore because I need a solution. And I grew up in a conservative Christian home, so it was like, if you just have Jesus, you'll be fine. And I'm like, I'm not effing fine. Yeah, yeah, I'm not. There is something else fundamentally wrong. And I also knew that it wasn't that I needed Prozac or whatever prescription they were handing out of the day. Like, I was like, there was something more internally. Needed to be done. And so I enrolled for health coaching school and didn't start until October. So I was reading all the pre-books that they were giving me and everything and just starting to make little changes. And when I went to school, it like blew my mind. Like, I had no idea how to eat. I didn't know anything how to care for my, like, human being, right? And so I started just like literally changing everything I was eating, and I started teaching cooking classes, and I had no idea what I was doing. Like, I had no idea how to hold a knife properly, but I was so excited about feeling good in my body again. So I've started working with clients, teaching cooking classes, and I was like, well, I need to learn how to actually cook if I'm going to teach cooking lessons. So I went to culinary school, and it's the only culinary school that focused on food and healing. So it was more about learning how to cook for heart disease, how to cook for diabetes, you know, that type of stuff.

So you're just inspired on your own. You're like, oh my God, I got energy and excitement. What can I do with this? And I don't even know what I'm gonna do yet, but I like this. What I found, maybe others can— so you have this natural ability, like you said, to want to heal. You just haven't realized that you'd love to do this.

Right. And also because I don't know how to cook, I need to teach people how, how to cook. Yeah. Because, and I really started to see that, okay, in therapy you can go for how long, right? And be talking and talking and talking and things don't change. I'm like, I changed my diet and in a very short time my thoughts were different. And it was just like, this is mind-blowing to me. So my parents started changing their diet and lifestyle. They were going off of medications and releasing weight. My clients that I was working with, my mom just kept referring her friends to me because they were like, what are you doing? And so it just kind of snowballed from there. And then when I was in culinary school, I went to this bakery in New York. That bakery was the first bakery that was a gluten-free, allergen-friendly bakery. It was really a big deal at the time, cuz this is back in like 2006, 7, 8. And so I was in the bakery and I remember standing there and having this— the best way I can say it is like a download, which sounds wacky, I get it. But it was literally like, I need to open a bakery. And I'm going to go a step further than what they did. And this is back in, again, like 2008 when I had the idea. We opened in 2010, but everything was free of gluten, dairy, eggs, soy, corn, and refined sugar. Whoa. Which now, not a big deal.

Yeah.

Then it was a big deal.

Yeah.

I was just hell-bent on having this bakery open. And so all of my 20s, I mentored high school kids. And so one of the kids, I was really close with her family, and this is going to tie into stories later, or probably remind me to tie it in later, but her dad was a multimillionaire. And So her brother and sister-in-law, we were on this foundation trip and I just kept talking about the bakery and the sister-in-law was like, we'll back you, you know, let's open the bakery. She had an interest in health and went to the same health coaching school that I did, but never really, you know, like, yeah. So we opened the bakery. Flash forward, we opened the bakery in 2010 and just like from the get-go, it was really popular. We were on, for anybody who knows Philadelphia, we were on South Street of Philadelphia and most people don't think of Philly as like health-conscious town. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah.

But we were down the street from CHOP, Children's Hospital of Pennsylvania. So we had so many parents come in where their kid had never had a cupcake for their birthday. And they come in and they're like, I can eat anything here. And just seeing their faces light up, like, it chokes me up.

Like, wow.

And at the end of the day, like, nobody really needs to have a cupcake, but, you know, we live in America. It's like, you know, we need to have something for your birthday. It's, you know, just, it just, it was so amazing seeing these kids be like, I was never able to eat this stuff and now I can. And so it just blew up, super popular. And my stuff was really good. And one night I go home from the bakery, I was exhausted, and I turn on the TV and I turn on the Food Network because I'm like, I just need something stupid to watch. And there's a show on, and it's this show Cupcake Wars where it's this competition. And I remember watching and being like, there's no way on God's green earth I would ever do this. Like, that is too stressful, no way. I go to the bakery the next day, I check the answering machine, and they're like, this is so-and-so from the Food Network, we would love to have you on, on Cupcake Wars. And I was like Frat. So I went back and forth because sugar, like, does so many things to our body. Like, we just don't need to have it. But one of the things that sugar does is feed cancer. And they asked us to come on for season 2— I forget number what episode it was, but it was for Hard Rock Cafe's, like, breast cancer awareness month. And I was like, I mean, here's conflict, right? Because it causes cancer, like, sugar. And even though our stuff is like coconut sugar, still, at the end of the day, your body doesn't need it, right? But we decided to go on because we're like, this awareness, blah blah blah. So we did not win. We got eliminated, thankfully. It is such a hard thing to do. Like, people don't realize all the things that go on behind the scenes. But I was glad that we got eliminated. But it was really fun to be on. And then we were on a couple of other shows that were on the Cooking Channel. And Eric, when I tell you my family has videos of me running away from the camera— like, when I was a kid, I was so incredibly shy. But, you know, I grew, I evolved, and now I have no problem. I love being on camera now, but that was so much fun. But one of the challenges with the bakery was that when I signed the deal with my partner, I am so trustworthy and I expect everybody would act the way that I do.

Yeah.

And so I let her have majority ownership because she was the one putting the money into it.

Sure. Yeah.

I was the sweat equity. I had already been working 2+ years on developing recipes and I was also the one working in the bakery and I'm looking back, there are so many things that we did wrong about it, but I let her have majority ownership and 2 years into it, she decided she didn't need me anymore. She tried to force me out and I was like, this was my baby, my idea. Like, why don't I buy you out? And, you know, and she was like, no, I thought about that, but the thought is unacceptable to me. I learned a lot of lessons.

Yeah. Good lesson to entrepreneurs listening, of course. Yes. Even these, these examples. Yep. We've all been there, done that early. So nothing worse than you getting pushed out of your own baby and all the hard work. I mean, it is such an emotional ride. I've been there.

It was, it was so hard and I fought back. So we ended up mediating and she bought me out, which was great. But going back into the whole money thing, like I didn't know what to do with it at the time. So I was going to open up some bakery with somebody else who also, he had a savory bakery in Philly and we were going to partner and do sweet and savory. And then when he would meet with a potential investor and he's like, you can handle the meeting, can't you? And I was like, no, I'm done. I'm not doing this again.

Yeah.

So that never happened. Didn't open up another one, which ironically, so the bakery was named Sweet Freedom. And on so many levels, like there's so many lessons, then I'm like, I got created the freedom for other people to have these baked goods, right? Was part of changing the industry. Like last night I was at this brewery that they have certain days where they shut the kitchen down, clean it all out, and they just have gluten-free stuff that day. And I'm like, I got to be a part of changing this trend.

Like, amazing.

It's crazy to think about. Once I sold the bakery, I didn't know what I was going to do. I was— started going to Tony Robbins stuff, and so I was like, well, I need help so he can have all the money. So I started going to all of his events, literally like in a year, like went to like pretty much every event. And then I started volunteering for them. And then I was going to volunteer at an event in New Jersey, and I remember before going there, I was like, I'm gonna go there and they're gonna put me at the coaching table, because you never know what you're going to do when you get there. They just tell you. And I was like, and then they're going to ask me to join the coaching team. And literally I get there and they're like, Heather, you're going to go to the coaching table. I was like, oh, okay, thanks. And then 3 days into it, the head of the coaching department at the time, he was looking at my DiSC profile and he was like, we really need like your DiSC profile, but in the feminine on our team. He was like, did you ever think about joining a team? I was like, oh, that's a great idea. Let me think about that.

Yeah.

So that's how that happened. And I coached for them for 3 and a half years. And you said therapy is like, let's talk about it over and over and over again. Half the time we don't get somewhere. Coaching in that environment is like, let's forget about the past and just move forward. But you can't because your past is all stuck in your nervous system.

Right.

And so it's always gonna show up.

Right.

And I coached so many people, you know, that it's just like, I gotta push, I gotta strive, I gotta power through, but they're burnt out. They're exhausted. They're not doing the things that light them up.

Right.

And I was like, there's something more than just change your state.

Right.

And at the end of the day, yes, it is change your state. Like when I changed my diet, that was changing my state. State, right? But a lot of times in the world of personal development, it's like, just change your state, just make them— just make a decision and do something different, and it's instantly going to happen, right? It doesn't work like that.

Yeah, it's a really good point. You're right, because it's, it's like, okay, that's almost like a Band-Aid to some degree on, on really what the wounds that are— you almost can fake it for a minute if you can get yourself to that point, but ultimately that, that history is going to find its way back in.

It always does. Yeah, yeah. So that then set me on this trajectory of like, I want to go something deeper. So then I got into energy healing and started doing energy energy healing with my clients that were like, all the tools that I got from, you know, Robbins wasn't working with those clients. And so we started doing energy work and started seeing shifts there. And I was like, okay, there's something deeper. And that got me into studying, you know, subconscious healing, hypnotherapy, like, you know, all these like, you know, different modalities, internal family systems and all these things. So I get to the deeper level of healing. So I incorporate all of those things. And so it's hard when people are like, what do you do? And I'm like, I change lives. I, there's so many different modalities that I bring into my work because There has to be, like everybody's different and everybody responds to things differently. So when I left Robbins, I was like, I'm just gonna figure it out. I'm just gonna figure it out. And I have, and I've stumbled along the way, you know, in many ways. What really made a big shift for me is, um, I have done so many of the tools, like I mentioned, I've done more plant medicine ceremonies than majority of, you know, people. But a friend was like, Heather, there's this protocol called the Safe and Sound Protocol that literally shifted things for me more than anything else.

The Safe and Sound Protocol. You said that fast. Make sure the other listeners get that. So the SSP, the Safe and Sound Protocol developed by Stephen Porges.

So he's the one who created the polyvagal theory, which is essentially, you know, we have our parasympathetic state, which is rest and digest. And then there's a sympathetic state where you go into fight or flight. Okay. Most entrepreneurs are in that fight or flight. Everything is constant reaction mode. Right. And it works every wire. So you're like, I got to constantly react. And so then when they have a day off, they're like, I don't know what to do with myself because they're nervous.

I always say, sometimes like vacation or sitting around doing nothing is stressful. Like it feels weird.

Yes. But then there's what we call the dorsal vagal state and that's a shutdown state. Right? And so we, we wanna have the ability to move through all of those, but most people are either stuck in this shutdown state or, you know, in that fight or flight. So like I have a client right now who he was referred to me because he's like, he's like, my nervous system is fried. And he's like, I keep having these business coaches tell me you need to do this, you need to do that. And he's like, I can't do anything barely right now. Right? So he's just so in that shutdown state. And sometimes we do want to shut down. Sometimes we do want to go in that fight or flight.

I want to make sure we really understand. When somebody says my nervous system is fried, how can, how do we relate to that? What does that mean? Because I wouldn't, that's not something I would normally say. What's another thing that I might say that's similar that actually really means my nervous system is fried? Is it stress? Is it anxiety? What is it?

Yeah, it could be like you just feel stressed all the time. You feel burnout. You feel like if just one more thing happens, like I'm going to explode.

Got it. You're just on the verge, you're on the verge of just losing it.

Yeah. I grew up with a dad who was an alcoholic and he, every time like you drop a pen and he's just like, oh my gosh. I'm like, dad, it's a pen drop. Right. But it's a big deal. Like everything just feels like it's like a big deal. Or you're so shut down that you're just like, I just can't even do anything. Okay. He's just, this guy's like, I can't even do anything. I don't have the capacity to do anything that these business coaches tell me to do because he's just been in shutdown for so long. And so we're working on getting his nervous system back up. But you wanna have, if you think about it like a car, like you wanna be able to step on the gas, 'cause sometimes like there's danger and you have to step on the gas. And then sometimes there's something in front of you and you need to pull the emergency brake up. But most people are either the gas pedal is stuck down or the emergency brake is stuck up. You wanna have the flexibility to be able to push on the gas, push on the brake, use the nervous system or use the emergency brake, you know, when you need it. So when my friend told me about this protocol, I was like, well, I'll try it, but I don't think— what could it do for me? Like, I'm pretty regulated. I've done so much work. But I want to go back to my story where I shared about how when I— before, like, when I was eating sugar and I was having suicidal thoughts, that still has carried with me even though I, I changed my diet and everything and I've done so much work. Whenever I eat sugar, instantly, within 24 hours, start thinking suicidal thoughts again. Wow. I wouldn't do anything because I always knew that it was the sugar talking, but it was there.

Right.

And nothing in my life changed, but it was still just there. So I'm going through this protocol and like, it's nice. I don't really notice big, big difference until Christmas time. Cause I started in November, but Christmas time I was like, wait a minute, I've been eating a lot of cookies and I have not had one suicidal thought. That to me, like, was mind-blowing.

Wow.

That is the biggest thing that I started to notice. And then there are so many things since then for me personally that I noticed that shifted and changed, just like letting myself be seen more in the world, like putting my work out into the world where, and where before I was like, no, I don't know. Like, I'm not that good. Like this. I'm like, no, like, I know my work is good. But when my nervous system was like fried, I was like, I'm just holding back, fearful of sharing myself with the world. That's how for me it's impacted. It's different for everybody.

So let's, so let's get into it. Now I'm curious. So what, what did you learn through this protocol? What are some tips and for us listening? And what are some good takeaways from, from this?

Well, So here's the thing about this protocol is that it is a listening therapy. So what it is, is 5 hours of music that is filtered, that sends signals of safety to your nervous system through your inner ear, your middle ear. And so where most nervous system things are like, here, tap on this, do this breathwork, you know, think these, reframe these thoughts, this literally, you don't have to do anything but listen to music. And as you're listening to it, it shifts your nervous system. And everybody has such different experiences. Like I have one of my clients, she's like, Heather, it feels like She's like, you remember the game Space Invaders? I'm like, yeah. Remember like the asteroids being blown up? It's like, yeah. Like, that's like— I feel like these things are popping off in my brain, and it's like these traumas are just being blasted off in my brain. Different people like are— say they're like, I don't really feel anything when I'm listening to it, but like I just have a deeper sense of safety or calm. I have a friend who also worked for Tony Robbins, so it's like we have all these tools, right, from work world. He's like, he just could not get himself to move forward. He's got a ton of birth trauma, and we've done a lot of subconscious, like hypnotherapy work around, like, you know, wound regression and all this kind of stuff, but it still wasn't moving the needle forward. Now he's like, oh my gosh, he's like, I never realized how, how protected I was and how, how much I was protecting myself. He's like, now he's like, I can see me doing these things and I actually want to move forward in business.

So, all right, so is this like a one 5-hour session or is this a progression of session?

It is, it is a progression. We titrate and work really slowly. I will— all my clients are remote, and so they have remote access to it. So you have to listen to through headphones, over-the-ear, non-noise-canceling headphones. And I start them off with a listening protocol, but we have to work together in adjusting because some people can get up to listening to 20 minutes and be fine. Some people, they'll listen 5 minutes and they're like, I need to take a break because stuff is happening. And so that's where the Safe and Sound protocol— the first foundation of it is safety, like feeling safety with the person that you're working with. It's because you have to have somebody to co-regulate with to talk about, hey, this is coming up for me, like, help me process through this, help me move through this, because it's not just like, oh, I listen to it, move on. It does bring up stuff.

So these sounds are literally reprogramming your brain. I mean, over time, and you just, like you said, and you're able to, like, you've done enough of these where you're, like, hearing what they're saying. And then how long, like, typically is a whole experience from start to finish?

5 hours for typically, it could be 6 to 12 weeks depending on, you know, the person. Okay. For me, it took like just under 2 months.

All right. So it's 5 hours total listening that's spread out over a period of time.

Yes. So literally we titrate it. We start listening to 1 minute and then we increase it to 2 minutes and then 3 minutes.

Wow. It's so weird. Like, like all these doses, you get a dose of sound, like that has to be slowly integrated. And then there's ways for you to see it's work, how it's working.

Yeah. Yeah. It's insane, Eric. It's crazy. It's crazy.

And so certainly somebody listening could say, oh, I want to call Heather and, you know, learn more about this. And others may just be curious about this. I want a couple of takeaways. Ways too for people that aren't ready yet to work with somebody like you that they can work on to help their, their nervous system, their stress, whatever it is. Any thoughts on that? Everything you hear on this show comes back to one idea: proximity. I wrote the book on it, literally. Proximity Pays, my best-selling book, available now at proximitypays.com.

Well, I would say, you know, we have all these tools to regulate us when we're dysregulated.

Yeah.

Um, and if you're like, I'm not ready to actually go and do the work, use a different— use any nervous system tools that you have already on a daily basis, and those can help shift. Like, and I'll give you one right now that's one of my favorites, and I'm gonna invite you to do it, but I'm gonna explain it first. I'm gonna take off my glasses. What it is is you're gonna have your face looking straightforward, and you're like, you have like a 90-degree, you know, from your chin and your neck, as much as 90-degree possible as most of us can, right? Eyes are going to be looking— your eyes are going to look up either way, whichever, right or left, whatever way they go. And then you're going to smell. So I like to act as if you have like something, you know, really beautiful smell underneath your nose. So you're going to smell and then you're going to swallow and then you're going to exhale as if you're exhaling like through a straw. And you're going to do that while you're looking up. So I'm going to invite you to do it. So put your head down, put your chin down.

Yeah. I'll look up.

Your eyes look up. Yep. And you're going to smell and then swallow and then exhale as if you're exhaling through a straw. And Eric, while you do that for like 2 or 3 more rounds, I'm just going to talk and explain why we're doing this. So when we look up, it helps to shift our perspective. 'Cause oftentimes when we look at something, we're looking at a problem we're trying to solve, we get so focused that we actually can't even see what is there. And so moving our eyes shifts our focus. And then the smell and the swallow and exhale, all those muscles are connected back to this big clump of vagus nerve that meet there, sending signals of safety to your nervous system. So how was that doing that for you?

I mean, good. I think one thing is it It got me away from thinking of all the million things in my head. So the hamster running the wheel in my head slowed down for a minute. And yeah, no, I feel kind of, I feel good. It's a good little exercise. Everybody should try that.

Yeah. And when you're trying it, if you notice that the swallowing is really difficult, that's an indicator, eh, that there can be like some tightness in your nervous system that needs to be released.

Got it.

So I recommend people to do that exercise for at least 5 minutes a day. And that can really help shift things.

I love it. I love it. Okay. How do you go from nervous system SSP protocol into human design and how do you tie them together?

Yeah. So we all have energy and how we're meant to move through the world.

Agree. I believe in that. Yep.

Yep. And our human design is the blueprint of who we be, right? It's the potential of who we can be, like our, what we're meant to do and be in the world.. And for me, and I'm gonna explain once we jump into your profile, because we have a type, which is how our energy is meant to move in the world. My energy, like, is, is fast moving, as you can see, right? And I can't do just one thing. And when I look at everything about my Human Design, it's like part of who I am is I see this bigger vision and bigger picture for things and how things work together. And for me, it's like, okay, yeah, we got our nervous system, but if you don't understand what your role is here for the world and you keep trying to do things the way that people tell you to do and you're like, why isn't this working for me? It's because it worked for him or her, but not for you. You got to work according to your energy.

Got it.

So we think about so much business coaching out there that's like, here, this is how I made, you know, 8 figures, go do this. And somebody's like, well, I tried it, it didn't work for me. Yeah.

Right. Or maybe the example would be, I was successful, I did this, this, but I'm not feeling right. I'm not happy. I mean, your energy is not in the right spot where it should be. You need to be psyched. That despite that, you might have had some monetary success, but you might not be happy and you're feeling off. Is that— would that be another example?

Yeah. Yeah.

So I'm going to screen share and we're going to guess before you're looking at it.

But okay. Well, when I— and the reason why we brought this up is that I mentioned to you before we started recording, as I was reading your book and I was like, oh my gosh, I'm like, I have to see his Human Design because stuff that you were talking about, about how, you know, you love sharing, you love connecting with people. I'm like, I think I can pretty much guess his at least at least his profile. There's so many other things, but like at least your profile. When I saw, I was like, okay, this makes sense.

We're going to put you on the spot and have you guess before you look at it to see if you're right.

Well, no, because we pulled it up and I was like, yeah, I was right. I was right. So let me— where is it? And I got a screen share. Of course. I'm like, oh, wait, my window.

So she's pulling up. So for Human Design, I essentially just gave you my name, birth date, time I was born, and birthplace. Those three elements. And all of a sudden you get this amazing chart which anybody could go— you can use AI and others. I think I cheated and just went to AI and it gave me a bunch of stuff, but she's going to do it the right way and explain what this means because I got a bunch of data and I had no idea what it means. Heather's the first one to actually— she'll explain this to me.

Okay, so again, anybody looking at this, I want to back up and say people are like, okay, just give my birth time, that's a bunch of woo stuff. I get it, totally get it. And the difference between Human Design and looking at something like Myers-Briggs, DISC, Enneagram, Strength Finders, right, all of those you answer questions from your mind, and they just explain to you like how your mind works. But a lot of times they're wrong because you may answer how you want them to be. Design— this looks at your mind and your body. It looks at how you see yourself and also how other people see you. Okay, so again, there's so much that we can go into here, but I'm just going to cover some of the basic stuff. Okay, so the first thing, whenever people talk about their Human Design, when you ask them, they're like, oh, what are you? And like you would say, oh, I'm a 4/6 manifesting generator.

Got —Okay. My profile says 4/6 for those not looking, and my type says Manifesting Generator. Yep. —Yep.

So your type, the Manifesting Generator, that's like— there are 4 types in Human Design, and some would say 5, but there's 2 types that basically have the same aura. The type explains your aura. And so the Manifesting Generator— I'm going to back up so we go high level. So there's manifestors in Human Design, and manifestors are the initiators. They are the ones who create the spark. And then we have the generators. And the generators— think about what a generator does. It generates energy. So when somebody in Human Design is a generator and they're doing what lights them up, it lights up everybody else around them.

You're saying it doesn't light up everybody else around them, just lights them up? It does. Okay.

And then we have projectors. And projectors are advisors. They're the ones who can see all the things that need to be done and then can tell people what needs to be done, but they're not the ones to actually do it. Do it. Okay, that's where the generators come in. Then we have what we call reflectors, and reflectors, it's like 1% of the population, they're super rare, but they're here to reflect back to us what we need to see. Okay, so a manifesting generator is a combination of a generator and a manifestor. Okay, you have the ability to spark ideas, inspiration, and you also have the energy, the life force energy to do it. Okay, so when we look at your body graph here, so people who are watching, they have this picture of like somebody's like kind of looks like airport terminal if you looked at it quick overview of it, right, where there's a bunch of shapes, there's a bunch of lines. All the shapes are— there's energy centers similar to like chakras, right? How chakras have their own energy, right? But similar to that. And we have some of those centers that are colored in and some that are not colored in. The ones that are colored in, each of those centers has their own function. And when it's colored in, that is your nature. It's your consistent energy. It's energy that you have consistent access to or constant access to, whereas these— the ones that are not colored in, they are ones that you don't have consistent energy to. It's more where you can be conditioned by other people. And so what makes you a manifesting generator is this brown center here is the throat center. Okay, that's colored in. And then this red square down here is your sacral center, and sacral is life force energy. Okay, it's like having that energy to go and do things. Both of those are defined, they're colored in. And then your throat center, it is directly connected to your sacral center. And as long as the throat center is connected to the sacral, or there's 3 other centers that can be connected to, that's what makes it a manifesting generator. So manifesting generators, like I said, they have, they have that life force energy of the generator. I mean, somebody who's a generator, they're the builders, right? Manifesting generator is an express builder. Generators like to do things more step by step. Manifesting generators are like, there could be 15 steps and you're going to be like, oh, I'm going to start at step 4 and then I'm going to go to 9. Hey, maybe I should start to go back to 1 and see what I should do at step 1. Right, right. Kind of all over the place. Yeah, your energy pivots a lot and you can't do just one thing. That's true. Hey, if somebody was like, you need to pick a niche, you need to pick this one thing, you would wither and Correct. So that's your type. Oh, and I talked about the aura. So the aura of a manifesting generator, and also generators because they share the same aura, is this warm enveloping aura. You know, people feel like this, like drawn into you. They feel comfortable in your energy. Where a manifestor's aura is closed off because if they're supposed to be the spark in the world, that has to come internally from them. So they have to block off all this energy coming at them. Makes sense. So that's when people are like, well, there's 5 types. At the end of the day, it doesn't really matter. But generators and manifesting generators can be similar, but there's those nuances that I mentioned. But the similarity, they have that same aura. So then the profile. So the profile is in Human Design, there's 6 profile numbers. And so you see, for people who are listening, on the right and the left of this body graph, there are 13 numbers on the right side and 13 numbers on the left side. Right. All of the numbers have a decimal point after and a number after that. And that number is either going to be a 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, or 6.

I see that. Yeah. Okay.

And those profile numbers, think of them like flavors. They give a different flavor to the first number there. And that first number there is in Human Design, they call them gates. I like to call them gifts, but there's 64 of those numbers. Those numbers all come from the each I Ching, which is an ancient Chinese text. It dates back to about 3,000+ years ago. And all of those 64 numbers have their own archetypes. It's energy. It's a frequency that we have access to. And when you look at your Human Design, you'll see that there are certain numbers that are highlighted, and those are the ones that are more accessible for you. Okay. All of the ones that are in the centers that are colored, they're ones that are that are more familiar to you. And then the centers that are not colored in, those are lessons for you to learn in life. So these two centers up here, up top, so I'm looking at Eric's bodygraph and his, we have two centers in our head and the rest of the centers are in our body. So going back to the nervous system stuff, 80% of our nerves run from our body to our brain, 20% run from our brain to our body. So this is why mindset stuff doesn't work. Because you can change your thought, but all that stuff's going to be hiding out in your body. Ah, all the way full circle. Okay. All right, so in Eric's case, he's got these two centers up top, and that's the crown center, which is all about inspiration, and then the one below that, the technical term of that is ajna, but that's conceptualization. And so for you, those being opened, it's like you, you filter other people's ideas, like, and you, like, ideas can come through and it's like everything's like, oh my gosh, this idea and this idea and this idea. And sometimes you may feel pressure to have all the answers because those centers are open. Yep, that's true, right? Creepy, right? Yeah. Wow, it's so creepy.

What does the 4-6 mean? So 4 is the left design, 6 is the personality.

So 4 is how you see yourself and the 6 is how other people see you. So I'm not going to go into explaining like all of them too much, but when I will say like the line 1, just to get a short understanding of the flavors of one, the line 1 is the investigator, the line 2 is what we call the natural, the 3 is the discoverer. I'm going to pause myself and let me go back, okay, just to get a visual. So imagine a house in front of you and you see somebody in the basement, basement researching. That's the line 1. The line 2 is the person in the living room strumming their guitar, just wanting to be left alone, exploring their passions. Don't call them out because they're not ready to, to show the stuff of the world, and they don't realize how good they are. The line 3 is running up the stairs, going off on their next adventure. They have a backpack full of stories. They have bruises to show that they have like fallen in life and gotten back down up and, you know, discovered things again. The line 4 is in the kitchen pouring coffee for everybody, connecting people, like getting people, you know, together and be like, oh, you guys would be, you know, great connections with each other, right? They're the networker. The line 5 is up in the attic window, and they are the ones that everybody's looking at, and they're like, oh, that person's gonna save the day. They're the solutioner, they're the savior, they're the one who could lead us out of this mess. And then the line 6, they're the ones sitting on top of the roof with binoculars in hand, seeing the big vision, and they're seeing the big picture of things, and they can see things that other people can't because for the first 30 years of their life, they were the person running up the stairs, discovering, learning through trial and error, failing forward. Wow. And then, so the first 30 years they're doing that, then from like 30 to 50, they're integrating stuff and just putting all those lessons together. And then 50 plus, they're that person on the roof being the wise sage of like Hey, I can help you because I've experienced this. Wow. Wow. Interesting. Right? So I'm guessing some of that lands for you.

Yeah, that definitely makes sense. Yeah. So you were reading my book and then you thought what?

Well, one of the things that you talked about in your book was how you loved connecting people and how you were always in different groups. Like you couldn't be pigeonholed into one group of people. Yep. Yep. And the line 4, right, is all about people. Okay. And the line 6, again, they're that leader and role model. And even though in your younger years you were in that trial and error thing, it's still that like, I am going to connect all these different people. And I see how these patterns work and I see how these things all fit together. Got it.

I love it. So, and then manifesting generators, what you would have guessed I was? Yes. Community builders. Community builders.

And also because like you couldn't, like you have multiple businesses. And not to say that somebody who's a generator, they can have multiple businesses and stuff too. But just like, again, when we were in San Diego, you and I never spoke, but just seeing your energy and your aura, I could just be like, oh, okay, yeah, he's not a projector. I could tell that. Things that you can just tell energetically from somebody.

Wow. Okay, so that's just cool. So if you haven't done Human Design, you just got a really, really cool a lot more than I have ever seen, uh, insight into that. Any last tips for anybody that wanted to do this on their own and/or hire somebody like you to help them through this?

Yeah, hire somebody. There's a lot of information. And can I show you one more thing about your, your design that is really— yeah, yeah. So when we have these centers that are colored in, you can see— and for somebody who's just listening, try to visualize a bunch of different shapes that are connected to each together. But you see, Eric, here that I'm circling, like this, this red triangle is connected to this triangle, which is connected to the square, right? Those three are connected to each other. And then when you look at these other ones, you see that there's all lines connecting those all together. Okay, does that make sense? So, but they're not connected to that other group, that first group that I talked about, right? So this is what's called— you see over here it says you have a split definition. Okay, what that means is that your energy needs something to bridge the gap to help it all connect. So for you, connecting with other people, when you're around the right people, will bridge that gap. So like, it's hard to see here, but there's this one line where there's half a line, it doesn't go all the way down. But if you're around somebody who has this other, one of these other gifts, it could bridge that energy together. And do you ever be, have you ever been around certain people and when you're like, man, things just click when I'm with them, right?

Right. Magic happens. Let's go build something.

—then it's because they're bridging those gaps for you. Really cool. Your design, going back to the whole, like, you connecting people and stuff, some of it is their connect helping you connect back to yourself fully and bridging that energy for you. Wow. And we won't even get into, like, I can look at your human design and tell you the best way for you to make decisions. And knowing that in business is so incredibly helpful. Wow. And there's 7 different ways to make decisions. And most people think, oh, you just got to do it this one way. But if you're not doing according to your design, you're going to make crappy decisions.

I love it. All right. I'm sold on this. Well, you and I could definitely go a long time on this, so I'm excited. I want to wrap up the last piece that we talked about, and this has been really cool, is you said first helping people rewire their nervous system using Human Design to even amplify and optimize what you just learned on the nervous side. And then ultimately, the last component is what you're finding in your clients and where you can help people and you've taught people is just understanding explaining how money has, you know, just money patterns and how people have made poor decisions. Walk through that sort of as a last piece here.

Yeah. So, how we do money is how we do everything. And our relationship with money shows up everywhere in life. And I had mentioned how I trusted my business partner and I was just like, "Hey, she'll be just like me." My money archetype is a nurturer and a connector. I am so trustworthy of people. And so, I effed myself out of a business, right? Because I was living in a disempowered state. Now that I understand this, like, I know how to still be a nurturer, still be a connector, but do it in a way that empowers both of us. But when we understand those patterns in our relationship with money, we can start to see how it shows up, and then we can live in a more empowered state. But it ties in and weaves in with our Human Design. And if our nervous system is dysregulated, we keep going to those old patterns over and over again. And so it's like, I'm going to go back to cupcake work. Yep. So when we were on Cupcake Wars, we were using an oven that we didn't know. We had recipes that we knew, but we didn't have an oven that we knew. And for anybody who's ever baked, you know that every oven is so completely different. And so Human Design is— and money archetypes is the, like, the— is the recipe. And having an oven that is regulated properly is the nervous system. We didn't— we weren't able to go past the second round because our cupcakes were weren't cooked evenly. Right. So it just makes a mess. We had the recipes, we knew exactly what we needed to do, but our quote unquote nervous system, right, our oven couldn't do it properly. Right. Right. And so the frameworks are great to have, but if your nervous system doesn't support it, it won't go anywhere. But you can have a great nervous system but not know the frameworks of how your energy is meant to move. So that's why I want, like, I love combining them all together.

So, if I'm optimized, my money patterns are optimized and I follow the steps, what does that look like? What's the end state if you're doing things efficiently?

Yeah. It looks like peace in your body. It looks like ease, like, "Oh, it does get to be this easy." Meaning, meaning making money or just money not stressing you out as much? Both. Because it depends because some people can make it and then they're just like, "Oh, I got to get rid of it right away." Right. Might have a harder time bringing it in. So everybody's, you know, different. So it just looks like more ease and more capacity to be able to earn more, to hold more, to feel safe with it.

Got it. So once you understand all the things, I get it. So once you understand the things, understand the space you should be playing in and how your body needs to react, your relationship with money completely changes because you're understanding what is it you really need, what's going to keep you safe, and then you're just optimizing across versus having money be a stressor. Stressor because you're probably not even doing the other things correctly. Exactly. Interesting. Well, it all comes together. Yeah. Very cool. Well, that's a good wrap. And I mean, it's interesting. I'm just thinking of an exercise I did with my EO forum and just thinking about everybody's relationship with money and the way they think about it and how different everybody is. It's just fascinating on that aspect. And that's a whole conversation in itself, the way people look at it.

It is. I'm right now doing a series of talks at a doctor's office. And understand this because how the conversations that they have with patients, like, some of them are just like, they're so afraid to share how much a treatment costs is of their own money stories. So we're uncovering all this, but then we dive into Human Design and understanding how some people, when they make decisions, they need more time. Some people need more information. Some people need, you know, all depending on their profile.

You just said a really important point I want to double down on. You know, the way we feel about money is the way we project. And oftentimes when we're going out there to sell and ask for the sale and close and all that. If we're not comfortable or we think it's a high price, you're right. That'll come up in the way we're even presenting certain things and we're not comfortable with it. Hard to ask for an order if you're not comfortable with money yourself and you're putting yourself in the client's shoes. So that's really interesting as you're talking through that. Yeah. Well, cool. Is there anything I didn't ask you that we should have talked about that I might've missed?

I think we covered a lot of the good stuff. I will say this. So one of the things that we were just talking about the money stuff is understanding the decision-making process is huge because when you can understand, like, and I'll go back to you, for you, your decision-making process. Well, do you want to know what your decision-making process is? Yeah.

I'm like, okay, what? Yeah.

So that red center that, that was highlighted, that's the sacral, that's the life force energy. So I'm going to give you a little exercise. I want you to notice, I'm going to ask you two questions and just notice how you feel with the questions. I don't care about the answer. Just notice how you feel with the questions. Okay, what do you want for dinner? Okay, question one. Now, do you want Chinese or Mexican for dinner? Right. So what did you notice the difference between those two questions?

You already know the answer to that question. You know which question I liked and didn't like.

What do you feel in your body?

More stress, more anxiety on the first one because it required me to be thinking and analyzing something that I just is not a major— I have too many other things to be making decisions on than dinner.

Yeah. So your design needs something to respond to. Do. Yeah, well, it needs like a yes or no, right? So anybody comes to you with open-ended things, be like, okay, give me a choice, right? So that's first part is you have to have a choice of something. But for you, your solar plexus is defined, which is your emotional part, which means you need to ride the emotional wave of something, which 53% of people have. And so when it comes to making big decisions, you're going to get that guttural yes or no. You listen to your gut, right? Your gut says yes or no to something, and you say, this sounds really great, give me 24 hours to feel into this. And then when the high emotional high is gone, then you can make a decision.

I get myself in trouble because I don't wait 24 hours. I just can make a decision quickly. I just move on.

Exactly. Yeah. And that is what so many people do. And so when high-pressure sales, like, you know, when I worked for Tony Robbins, they would be on the phone with people and be like, well, if you don't make a decision now, you're not serious about changing your life. That's not true. 53% of the people need time to process that. So, when I'm working with somebody and already our first conversation, I usually know the Human Design, I'm like, listen, this may feel great for you, but I don't want you to make a decision right now. I want you to go home and sleep on it. If you have more questions, come back to me. What about for a Jedi trick?

Get everybody's Human Design before you talk to them on sales and say, and they're going to love that when you're just like, don't want your money. You need to sleep on it. You make too many impulsive decisions based on your Human Design. They're like, So yeah, no, that's cool. So Heather, you've been changing topics. Just last note, I'm going to ask you a question. How has your experience so far been in Speakeasy Mastermind? What are you enjoying?

Oh my gosh. So when I left the Tony Robbins world, I kind of like took myself out of being in any type of networking, you know, or like worlds for many reasons. I'm a line 2 profile in human design and we like to hermit. And so I've been hermiting for a long time. Time. And I've had some crappy experiences. And so when I was introduced to Speakeasy Mastermind, I was like, ah, I don't know, I don't know, because I need time to think on things. And I was like still like, you know, unsure because I needed a little bit of time to warm up to some things. But especially going to San Diego and just seeing the authenticity of people, because there can be a lot of really like bro crap experiences, you know, with this, with this type of environment. And is not there at all. Like everybody that I've met has been really genuine because of my background, like, I want to be around people who are thinking about how they're taking care of themselves emotionally, physically, mentally, spiritually. And while I'm not— not everybody's going to meet that for me all the time, the majority of people that I met were high-level thinkers and can see things holistically instead of just like, how many sales do I have to get and have things be transactional. Like, nobody walked up to me and was like, here, here's my card. And I'm like, whoa, I don't even know your name. Yeah, so I've really like, I've been enjoying it and love the space that you guys have created and, and love that you have like, looking at your design, right, got to use your gifts to bring this into the world. And I would love to, you know, because you can look at people's designs together, and I would love to see you and Glenn's design together, you know, and see like, you know, what things you bring to each other. But I've really been enjoying it, and I think that if somebody's looking for a space that to come into that they want to grow and expand and serve, I think it's a great space.

Awesome. Well, I appreciate that. And I really appreciate your time. You gave me a lot of time today. So thank you for that. And all my personal lessons here on this. So I'm excited to take what you learned and dig in further. And thank you so much. I look forward to chatting with you more soon.

Yeah, you too.

Thanks, Eric. And that's a wrap from the Speakeasy Mastermind Podcast. If something sparked for you, don't keep it to yourself. Share it. Do it and pass it to the one person who needs to hear this right now. Want in on the real mastermind? Tap the link in the show notes to apply. Until next time, keep scaling, stay sharp, and don't be the smartest one in the room. Hello, I've been noticing you've been following along to Inside the Speakeasy Podcast and the conversations I'm having out there resonates with you, then I'd like to invite you to apply to learn more about becoming a member of Speakeasy Mastermind.