Susan DrummCEO Advisor & Executive Coach | Leadership Change Agent

Did Your Leadership Style Start in Childhood #shorts

7 Oct 2025 · 1 min

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1:07

A short, first-person reflection by Susan Drumm arguing that common leadership behaviors—staying calm, avoiding conflict, managing others’ emotions—often originate in childhood family dynamics. She recounts a memory (age ~6–7) of her father abruptly changing the TV channel and ordering her out, and explains she learned to anticipate and manage his mood; this coping strategy became both a leadership strength and a personal trap.

Chapters

So you think it's your leadership style, the way you take control and stay calm or avoid conflict or just power through. But for most of us, that move we perfected, it doesn't start in the boardroom. It started in childhood. I remember one day as a kid, Maybe I was 6 or 7, my dad came home in a mood, and he'd had a very long day and was pretty disgusted with his work. And when he walked in, he didn't even say hello. And I was watching tv, and he just came in and changed the channel without a word. And I said, hey, I was watching that. Well, he didn't say sorry. He just yelled, get out. That hit hard. Not because what he said, but because how invisible I felt. And that wasn't the first time. The rule in our house was manage Dad's energy at all costs. Read the room, keep it calm, don't ask for too much. So I learned to lead by anticipating, by managing emotions, by trying to stay one step ahead of conflict. And that became my superpower, but it also became my trap.